So here it is- "Smoke"! Sorry it took me a while to write this part up- I wasn't exactly sure how I would go about this… I really don't think it's mushy at all- I just think Bakura is definitely in for an interesting time when he has to finally speak to Ryou in the next part ("Pigeons and the Crumbs"). Um… I also don't think the rape scene is that graphic or anything… hopefully I don't get any complaints about that side of it… [looks at the readers threateningly] And yes- I understand that it's horrible to have Ryou-chan be rapped and all… but I would really have to say that it would HAVE to be something big for Bakura-chan to finally do something for his hikari!

Disclaimer: Read the first track!

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*…*: song lyrics   '…': thoughts

Left of the Middle: Smoke
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*My lullaby… hung out to dry…
What's up with that? It's over…
Where are you dad? Mom's looking sad…
What's up with that? It's dark in here…*

The man sat silently, elbows resting on his knees, finger tips touching- making a triangle of his hands. Bakura's dark brown eyes were starring straight ahead into the street; the rain's scent filling his lungs with each breath.

'Six months…' The man felt as if any strength of his former self had disappeared. 'I can't blame him, though…' A gust of wind made the rain fall hard for a few seconds. 'He looked like he might really be happy with that girl he was with…' A flash of lightning illuminated his calm face. 'Who was I trying to kid anyway? Thinking that maybe I might be able to undo everything I did before..?'

For the entirety of the time he was with Tea, it seemed that Bakura had always tried to hold onto a shred of what could be ignited between Ryou and himself once again. But he had no hope anymore. Ryou had moved on- and it seemed as if he should as well. But somehow, he couldn't let go. Wet dreams that didn't involve anyone but Ryou were frequent; he imagined his hikari in Tea constantly. It was as if the drug that was his hikari was disappearing and he was trying to hold onto it longer and longer.

'But I was so cold to him today…' Bakura sighed, closing his eyes. The look on the young man's face materialized in his mind. 'Such an interesting thing to do after I haven't seen him in so long… I miss him…' He frowned. 'Miss him?'

"Yeah right…" His words aloud tried to convince his mind of a fake truth. He smirked at it- but then his face slid back into seriousness. "I do miss him…"

A hand touched his shoulder, making Bakura look up; Tea bending over to look at him. "What's the matter, hun?" She smiled lightly, sitting down next to him on the cold stoop. The woman shivered a bit, hugging her knees. "Thanks for taking me out to dinner tonight." Bakura stayed silent, starring ahead at the puddles of water that rippled with falling rain drops. "You saw Ryou- and you didn't say anything. I'm proud of you." At this, the man glared straight ahead.

"I don't want your praise." His voice was harsh.

"Hmph… well- I'm happy that you didn't. I don't want you to leave me." Her hand touched his shoulder lightly, he pulled back.

"What should it matter to you if I talk to him?" Bakura finally looked at her.

"You don't have to hate me because of him, ya know? I take care of you better than he ever did." Tea spoke in a tone of self appraisal, looking up at the dark clouds.

'Shut up…' Bakura didn't want her near him at the moment. 'Shut up…' Then suddenly he felt heavy- as if a weight was being pushed down upon his shoulders. 'What?' He glanced around- everything looked blurry for a few seconds- then returned back to normal. Tea was caressing his back. 'What was…?'

"Let's go back inside, baby… unless you wanna do it in the rain…?" The girl giggled, fingers running down one of his thighs.

*Why… bleeding is breathing…
You're hiding- underneath the smoke in the room-
Try… bleeding is believing…
I used to…*

Biting his bottom lip, Bakura reached his pinnacle, slumping down onto the woman underneath him. His body was covered in fresh sweat of not only his body, but Tea's as well. It was as if every time he climaxed, he was trying to rid himself of the pain he felt for imagining a different person with whom he was with. The girl giggled, fingers caressing the area at the base of the back of his neck, her calves wrapped around his legs as she hugged him. Bakura felt empty- like he was about to be swallowed by some sort of pain that he couldn't rid himself of.

"God… you're so good at this… no wonder I don't wanna let you go…" She licked her lips, Bakura closing his eyes. She kept rubbing it in, huh?

Ringing made Tea look to her left at the phone on the glass coffee table. Reaching out, she picked it up and brought it to her ear.

"Moshi moshi. Malik?" Bakura turned to face her, she was starting to sit up. "Bakura? Oh- he's right here…" She handed the phone to him. "Something about him calling from the hospital or what not." Tea slid off the couch, reaching for her scattered clothing.

"Hello?" Bakura sat up, running his hand through his light hair.

"You need to get down here." The male's voice was hurried.

"What? Why?" He massaged his temple.

"Ryou's in trouble." Bakura lifted a brow.

"What happened?"

"I don't know if I should say this over the phone…" The voice sounded both nervous and hesitant.

"What the hell happened, Malik?" He started reaching for his boxers, a slow sort of moving. It couldn't be anything serious, right?

There was a pause. "Ryou was attacked… some guys beat and rapped him." Bakura stopped moving, starring straight ahead. "The doctors also found out he's bulimic and he's been cutting himself." Bakura opened his mouth as if he was to say something- then suddenly just turned off the phone, flinging it across the room, rushing to pick up his clothing.

"What's the matter, honey?" Tea walked into the living room with a mug of steaming tea in her hand. She stood at the doorway, watching as he yanked on a black T-shirt. Bakura looked at her for a second.

"Don't call me 'honey'." The man snarled out, he was pulling on a jacket. With a quick stride, he walked past her, going to the front door.

"What the hell happened to you?!" Tea snapped back, glaring at him. "If it was Malik- I bet it has something to do with Ryou, huh? I don't want you to go see him."

"URUSAI!" Bakura boomed out, opening the door and stepping out.

"I don't want you to see him!" She was trying to command him.

"BAKA NA BAITA!" And he slammed the door, taking off at a run through the rainy streets.

*My mouth is dry- forgot how to cry…
What's up with that? You're hurting me…
I'm running fast- can't hide the past…
What's up with that? You're pushing me…*

The sight of the pail young man attached to wires and massive beeping machines caused the man to take a sharp intake of air. Ryou's eyes were closed peacefully, arms resting over the stiff cotton sheets. Just from what could be seen- there were cuts scattered along his cheeks- a bruised eye- writs slit in several places, bruises adorning them from where he'd been held. There was a clear tube attached to his arm- he'd been drugged for sleep that may not even be full of rest. Bakura stood at the foot of his bed, starring at the young man's abused face.

'How…?'

"I found him in the city when I was taking a walk. Apparently he'd at least tried to put up a good fight." Malik leaned against the wall behind him, arms crossed. "The strap to the Millennium Ring is ripped- they tried to steal it." Bakura stayed silent, hands were now gripping the foot rail. "He was holding it when I found him."

Standing upright, the other male sighed, turning to face the exit. "Please don't hurt him while you're in here. He's been beat up too much tonight." And he walked to the wooden door, stepping out into the fluorescent lighted hallway. Bakura knew that Malik wasn't serious in that he'd hurt his hikari right then- but he resented that he'd make a comment like that when Ryou was so weak.

Sighing, he pulled a chair up next to the hospital bed, taking the young man's hand in his- it was cold. 'I'm so sorry, Ryou…' His eyes never flinched from the serene face. 'Nothing like this is ever supposed to happen to you…' The young man opened his mouth slightly- breathing. 'I never thought-' Bakura grimaced.

"That's right- I never thought…" The yami closed his eyes. Flashes of all the beatings flooded back to him at once- the pushing, the yelling, the spitting in his hikari's face. It was all coming to him plainly: he'd been the source for Ryou's self torture. He was the one who was making Ryou starve himself and cut himself repeatedly. Bakura shook in anger at what he'd done before.

'Look at you now… this would have never happened if I had been nice to you from the start…' With a trembling hand, he reached out and ran his fingers through the young man's silver hair; it felt soft against his touch. But Bakura could remember when he pulled it roughly, treating the thin strands like pieces of rope.

Breathing in a tremendous amount of courage, Bakura leaned down and kissed the young man's forehead. He knew that his hikari would know nothing of it, but feeling the gentle skin pressed against him at least calmed the man a little. Sitting up again, Bakura shivered, his eyes falling upon a silver clipboard- the doctor's report.

*Why… bleeding is breathing…
You're hiding- underneath the smoke in the room…
Try… bleeding is believing-
I used to… I used to…*

Bakura closed his eyes, opening them slowly as his fingers traced the edges of the silver clipboard. He opened it slowly, looking over the first sheet, the doctor's notes scribbled what medication he'd been given and when he'd come in. Flipping the page, the dark eyes narrowed in anger. Everything the doctor had examined was listed.

'Extensive bruising along back, hips, shoulders, wrists, face and neck. Anal penetration cause of internal bleeding- attributed to no lubrication- STD tests pending. Excessive cuts along ankles, upper thighs, abdomen, and wrists. Mild stages of bulimia nervosa (mild teeth deterioration, gastrointestinal fluids lacking in potassium).'

The man flipped through the pages- there were pictures. Pictures of all the bruises, and the scars- how Ryou looked when he'd been brought in. Lip bleeding, eyes closed- bruise starting to show around his eye, hair in disarray.  Bakura set the clipboard on the bed stand; he wasn't there to protect his hikari like he was supposed to.

'I'm a failure… a-'

"Failure." He stared down at the young man's face once again. "I'm a failure, Ryou." There seemed to be no way of denying it anymore, everything was stacked against him- all of his pride was the root of his actions. "Gomen nasai… Ryou…" He took the young man's hand in his once again, kissing the knuckles with gentle lips. Bakura knew that once the hikari woke up, he'd never be able to act the same- but he'd never know, right? He could be as emotional as he wanted, finally pour his heart out. But that wasn't like him.

His chocolate eyes were empty in their longing stare at the young man. He'd dreamed about him so much- about being able to hold him close and kiss his lips gently- whispering his name. But now Ryou was lost in his dreams; body abused and literally rapped. Bakura didn't know what to do anymore- was there even anything he could do?

He leaned forward, head resting atop Ryou's bed, eyes watching his gentle hand. He closed his eyes, sleep starting to take even him.

*Why… bleeding is breathing…
You're hiding- underneath the smoke in the room….
Try… bleeding is believing- I saw you- crawling on the floor-*

The dark walls echoed his steps as he made his way to the single door, starring at the knob.

'Do I really want to do this?' Bakura closed his eyes- imagining the sleeping face of his hikari in the hospital room. Blindly, he turned the knob in front of him- light seeping into his dark soul room. His dark eyes opened, starring at the white door in front of him- he'd never seen it before in his own stubbornness.

With slow steps, he walked in front of Ryou's soul room, starring at the silver knob.

"Ryou?" Bakura whispered lightly. He really had no idea what he was doing- all he knew is that he really only wanted to cry at his hikari's feet- he'd been the reason for all of the young man's pain. "Ryou…?" He reached out to knock- but the door slid open slowly. The yami's eyes widened as he looked inside. The walls were painted in white and pale green- pictures lined the walls. Yuugi- Yami- Joey- that girl he was with in the restaurant. But pit in his stomach was reached when he saw the picture of himself. The image wasn't mad or upset, it was smiling lightly.

Bakura took a step forward into the room- it was silent. The items scattered around included a deck of duel cards, a stack of books, a CD player- the millennium ring. He reached down and picked it up, memories flooding back to him.

*Why… bleeding is breathing…
You're hiding- underneath the smoke in the room…
Try… bleeding is believing- I saw you- crawling to the door-*

"Let go of me!" He pulled his arm away, only to be pushed against the wet brick wall of the alley.

"Aw… why would we let you go?" One of the males whispered into his ear. "You're a pretty catch…" His wet tongue licked the young man's cheek, causing him to try and pull away once more.

"Don't flinch, pretty one!" A hand gripped onto the back of his neck, shoving him harder against the wall. Ryou moaned in pain, yet it seemed nothing like what Bakura would have done; the feeling of the sandpaper hurt his skin. His pants were ripped down- they were all ready soaking wet from the rain and they felt cold as they grazed his skin with wet knives. "And a nice ass, too! Gentlemen- I have first choice since I picked him out!" The men laughed- their voices were hurting Ryou's ears.

His hands were pegged against the wall tightly, the back of his neck being squeezed, a tongue was tracing circles along his exposed areas. 'Bakura… Bakuraaa…' Ryou could feel tears starting to form at the corners of his eyes. 'Please… Bakura…' He whimpered- the strange man had penetrated and it was sending shocks up his spine; the young man's body wanted to collapse in pain.

"Ah… he looks so tight!"

"Hmph… he is!" Ryou's hips were hurting from the strong hands against his skin. And it seemed that the man behind him couldn't control himself- he climaxed quickly; their positions changed- another man holding his head to the wall- and they commenced once again.

"Uh…" The young man could feel the man's breath against his neck as he came as well.

"You guys better have left me with at least some blood!" The positions changed again. "Ah…" The final man penetrated- he was moving quickly with the fresh blood spilling from the young man's body. Ryou closed his eyes tightly.

'Bakura… Bakura….' He was crying uncontrollably as the man climaxed; they turned him around, still pushing him against the wall.

"Yes- a good one…" One licked his neck- trailing down to his collar. He spotted the strap of the Millennium Ring. "Look at this!" The man pulled the ring out from under his shirt; it's color gleamed even in the cloudy sky.

"I wanna keep that as a souvenir!" The one who had just spoke pulled hard, it ripped off Ryou's neck. They let go of his body, they were turning to leave.

"No…" Ryou's body slump to the ground. With clumsy hands, he pulled his pants up; he could feel liquid running down his legs. "No… Bakura…" The young man struggled to push himself up, eyes starring after the three men only a few feet away. 'I can't let you…. Take… Bakura…' The pain he felt was making it hard even to move his arms. Reaching out quickly, he grabbed onto the raincoat of the man with the ring, punching him in the nose- he caught the ring as the man let go in order to hold onto his bleeding face. The three began shouting- one punched Ryou in the face, causing him to finally collapse in complete pain- another kicking him in the stomach.

"Fuckin' BITCH!" The bleeding man shouted.

"What's going on?!" A voice called from the opening of the alley. The three men looked up, then ran in the opposite direction. Ryou was barely conscious long enough to see a familiar pair of shoes run up to him.

*Why… bleeding is breathing…
You're hiding- underneath the smoke in the room…
Try… bleeding is believing- I saw you… falling to the floor…*

Bakura let the ring fall soundlessly to the ground. His knees gave out, the man falling to the ground- eyes and expression both blank at what he'd seen. Ryou had been crying for him- for protection. And he'd been having sex with Tea at the same time as his hikari cried for his help. He'd let the woman seduce him- he'd felt the change when the ring was ripped away- yet he did nothing but go and sleep with Tea.

"Ryou…" He put his head in his hands. "Ryou, I-" Tears started to run steadily down his face. He'd seen his own downfall- he wasn't worthy of being anyone's yami- he couldn't even protect the one person he had fallen in love with.

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All of your reviews are great- thanks everyone! (and thank you so much for not killing me because of the last track…!)