Dexter's Laboratory is copyright (C)1996 by
Hanna-Barbera Productions and Cartoon Network.
Sailor Moon is the property of Takeuchi Naoko and some other folks
such as D.I.C. and Cloverway.
jlfenton65@yahoo.com
I don't own Dexter's Laboratory, I didn't make the characters, and I'm not trying to make money on this, so please don't sue me. Ditto for Sailor Moon.
Many thanks to my pre-reader, Ben Oliver.
Author's Notes: This is a typical Dexter's Lab style parody. See chapter one for full rant.
Last time on Dexter's Laboratory, Sailor-D had confronted the Evil Man-Dark General from the Negaverse. Using her super powers, she naturally prevailed. However, the Man-Dark General escaped. What evil does he plan for our heroes? Will Sailor-D find the other scouts? Will Dexter be mortally embarrassed before the end of the chapter? Stay tuned for the next exciting chapter!
Dee Dee bit her tongue, thinking again. "I need to find the other Scouts!"
Dexter started pushing her towards the exit. "They are obviously not in here. Go play your little game elsewhere. I have much work to accomplish after the little skirmish you and Mandark precipitated in my laboratory."
Dee Dee stepped to the side, allowing Dexter to fall on his face. "I'll need some help to defeat my evil foe!" She grabbed Dexter, held him high off the ground, and shook him. "Oh, Dexter! You have to help me!"
"E-e-e-e-nough! S-s-s-s-top s-s-s-s-haking m-m-m-m-e!"
Dee Dee dropped him abruptly.
Dexter stood and brushed off his lab coat. "I did what you asked of me. I made you a stupid moon princess. I have no time to participate in your little girly games." He made some shooing gestures. "Go play elsewhere while I attend to the reconstruction of the damaged sections of my laboratory."
Dee Dee turned her nose up as she folded her arms across her chest. "I'm not going anywhere until you agree to help!"
Dexter pulled a remote from his lab coat, aimed it at his sister, and pressed the large, red button on it. A robot grabbed Dee Dee by the collar and dragged her off.
Dexter mopped his brow. "Whew! Now to start the repair droids." He turned around and ran into Dee Dee's legs.
"Pleasssssssse, Dexter? I really need your help!"
Dexter fumed a few moments, then stomped over to a nearby control panel. "No!" He pressed a button and a large tube descended from the ceiling over Dee Dee. His sister was sucked up into the tube to be deposited in the living room.
He looked around, expecting to see Dee Dee. After a few moments, he turned back to the control board and entered the sequence to begin activating the repair droids. One rolled to a stop in front of him.
"Why are you not repairing the facilities? There is much work to be done."
It pulled off its faceplate to reveal Dee Dee underneath. "I need to find the other Scouts! You're the only one who can help me!"
Dexter gaped for a long moment, then closed his eyes. He knew he was going to regret this. "I will assist you in your endeavor - but -" he cut off Dee Dee's squeal of delight, "if I am to participate in this farce, I shall choose my own role!" He produced a cape with a flourish and spun once. He was now wearing the cape over an elegant tuxedo. The frames of his eyeglasses had expanded into a makeshift mask. He produced a top hat and set it atop his head.
"Behold! The dashing hero, Tuxedo Glasses!!" He struck a silly pose.
Dee Dee bit her tongue and placed her hand on her chin. "Hmm, I don't know, Dexter. I think I need my trusty advisor, Luna."
Dexter stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Luna? I am afraid I am not familiar with that particular character."
"She's my trusty cat advisor!" Dee Dee struck Dexter atop the head with her moon scepter. In a flash of light, Dexter was dressed in a black ninja outfit, complete with cat ears and a tail.
Dee Dee nodded once. "That's better! Okay Luna, where do we start looking for the Scouts?"
Dexter glowered at the girl. "Don't call me Luna!" He struggled to remove the cat-outfit. "I refuse to be a stupid cat advisor! I am the debonaire hero and will be treated with the appropriate respect or you can find someone else to play your stupid game!"
Dee Dee waited until Dexter had fully extricated himself from the suit, then struck him with the scepter. A glitter of magical sparkles faded leaving him once more clad in the offending suit. "Whatever. So Luna, do you think the other Scouts are nearby?"
"AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" Dexter vented his rage, then took a moment to calm himself. "I can see that I will be incapable of resuming my interrupted schedule until we resolve the current dilemma." He took a deep breath. "Say Dee Dee! I'll bet your little friends Mee Mee and Lee Lee would like to play!"
"THAT'S IT!"
The shout knocked Dexter off his feet.
Dee Dee smiled, the grin reaching from ear-to-ear. "They'll know where the other Scouts are!"
Dexter slapped a hand to his face. "Yeah, yeah. Just go!" He stabbed a finger towards the exit, and breathed a sigh of relief when Dee Dee finally zipped off. "Finally!" He peeled off the costume, pulled his trusty wrench from his back pocket, and started to work on the lab.
Mee Mee and Lee Lee were sprawled in front of the Pony Puff Princess Prancing Pony Parade Park and Pavilion. Dee Dee popped up behind the girls.
"Hi Mee Mee! Hi Lee Lee! You'll never guess what just happened!"
Both girls jumped, then gasped as they took in Dee Dee's outfit.
Mee Mee pointed. "You - you're -"
Dee Dee struck a heroic pose. "Sailor-D! Champion of Love and Justice! In the name of the moon, I will right wrongs and punish evil-doers everywhere!"
Mee Mee and Lee Lee jumped up with arms high, "aaaaaaaaAAAAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhh!!!!! We want to play too!"
Dee Dee thought it over. "Eh - okay!" She shrugged.
The trio flitted on the tips of their toes back into Dee Dee's house.
Dexter stared into the ocular image enhancer - again. The adjustments were very delicate. He mumbled under his breath in a tense manner, "gently... this is very delicate and fragile... just one more modification and I will finally have my lab back together..."
Dee Dee, Lee Lee, and Mee Mee popped up behind him.
"Hello!"
"Hello!"
"Hello!"
Dexter jumped a foot in the air as the isolinear optic process chip snapped in half. Dexter gave it a sad look. "Why do I even bother..."
He rounded on the girls. "Dee Dee, Mee Mee, Lee Lee!" He pointed to each one in turn. "I have no time for your stupid shenanigans! How am I to finish these delicate repairs while you stupid girls prance around and destroy my laboratory?!"
Mee Mee leaned over, propping herself up on his head. "Yo, Dex-man! Fix us up like Dee Dee here!" She hooked a thumb at where Dee Dee was demonstrating her powers to Lee Lee by destroying a newly repaired bank of database storage units.
Dexter winced in horror as an explosion enveloped the units. He slapped his hands on either side of his face. "My laboratory!"
He tried to charge toward the pair, but found his legs kicking uselessly as Mee Mee hoisted him off the ground.
She looked him in the eyes. "You know what to do if you want us to leave."
Dexter laughed nervously. "Right. Two transformation devices, coming right up." He grumbled as he stomped over to the main computer console. After pushing various buttons for a minute, the matter transduction unit glowed a brilliant white. The light faded and Mee Mee knocked Dexter over as she rushed forward, screaming in delight.
She grabbed one of the rods, then thought a moment. She raised it above her head and yelled, "MARS! PLANET! POWER!"
Mee Mee spun slowly on one leg as a bright light surrounded her. Her leotard changed to white like Dee Dee's, while the tutu formed into red pleats. Red bows grew at the back and neck of the outfit. A red choker with a gold star formed around her neck, and a gold tiara with a red gem formed around her forehead. White, elbow-length gloves trimmed in red at the elbows sprang into being.
Dexter groaned in dismay as the computer again provided the appropriately corny music for the transformation sequence.
Lee Lee jumped up and down. "My turn! My turn!" She grabbed the other transformation rod.
"MERCURY! POWER! MAKEUP!"
A bright light surrounded her as she pirouetted. Again, the leotard changed to white, while her pleated skirt changed to blue. Blue bows formed, along with a blue choker. Blue trimmed white gloves adorned her arms. The tiara held a blue gem this time.
Dexter writhed in agony as yet more corny music blared throughout the lab. "Make it stop! Make it stop!"
Dee Dee and Mee Mee confronted Lee Lee as the sequence ended. "Mercury Power Makeup?!"
Lee Lee blushed in embarrassment as she swiveled one foot back and forth on its toes behind her. "It sounded more feminine."
Mee Mee rolled her eyes, then rubbed her hands together. "All right! Time to see what super powers we got!"
Dexter whimpered from where he lay on the floor. "My poor lab!"
Maniacal laughter suddenly rang through the lab. "HA, HA HA! HA, HA HA, HA HA!" Mandark flourished his black cape. "It is I, Mandark!" He brandished a large weapon. "With my new and improved Matter Transmogrifier Gun, I shall make a monster that cannot be stopped! Then I, Mandark, Master of Evil, shall -"
He broke off as Dexter clung to his leg. "Please, Mandark! You must get them to leave my laboratory!"
Mandark shook his leg, trying to extricate it from Dexter's hold. "Let go, fool! No one may touch the grandeur that is Mandark!" He stopped shaking his leg, leaving it stuck straight out from his body as he saw Dee Dee. "Except the perfection of beauty that graces our otherwise black and dismal universe." Hearts swirled around the boy. "Sailor Deeeeeee!"
Dexter let go of Mandark's leg. "Hm, I can see that Mandark, my long-time rival, will be of no help in the extrication of the girls from my laboratory as long as my stupid sister Dee Dee is present. My only hope now is to assist the girls in defeating Mandark and hope they take their silly game elsewhere."
He hopped behind a conveniently placed power conduit. When he sprang back out from behind it, his cape and tuxedo were back.
"It is I! The great Tuxedo Glasses!" He pointed to where Mandark floated in his dreamlike state. "It is time to put out the garbage, and that means you!"
The girls finally noticed the commotion and gasped as they saw their mortal enemy.
"The Man-Dark General from the Negaverse!"
Lee Lee jumped forward. "I'll take care of him!" She spun around and flung out an arm. "MERCURY AQUA BUBBLE!"
A large sphere of water shot towards Mandark, missing the boy and splashing against a row of computer servers. Large arcs of electricity sparked across the racks as the water shorted out the electronics.
"AAAAHHHHHHH!!!! My computers!!" Dexter fell to his knees in horror as rack after rack turned to slag as they shorted out in a flurry of arcs of electricity.
Mee Mee took a step forward. "I'll handle this!" She spun as her arms swung around in a circle. "MARS PLASMA BURST!"
A sphere of ionized air shot from her palms and raced off into the distance, not coming anywhere close to Mandark. The explosions and smoke rising in the distance told everyone the power of the attack.
Mee Mee scratched the back of her head. "Oops!"
Dee Dee raised her moon scepter. "This is a job for Sailor-D!"
She was stopped by a screwdriver embedding itself in the floor by her feet.
"STOP!" Tuxedo Glasses confronted the would-be heroine. "You can't do it, Sailor-D! You know you are too incompetent to confront Mandark! Leave it to someone who knows what he is doing!"
Dee Dee frowned at her brother. A snap of her wrist and the cat costume was back. "Luna! What do we do?! Sailor Mercury and Sailor Mars have already failed to stop the Man-Dark General!"
Dexter fumed. "Just toss him in the transporter chamber." He muttered under his breath, "Assuming it is still working." He spun around and shook a fist at his sister. "And don't call me Luna!"
Dee Dee nodded at Mee Mee and Lee Lee. "You heard Luna! We must drive him into the transporter chamber with our attacks!"
Dexter jumped in shock. "That is not what I said!! No!! Wait!!"
Lee Lee turned to Mandark. "MERCURY AQUA BUBBLE!" This one struck home, drenching the boy as it knocked him off his feet. It also splashed the Laboratory Laser Lathe controls. The high-powered laser spun completely out of control, the laser beam cutting rows of equipment all around the lab.
One beam shortened Dexter's tail a few inches. "My laser! My laboratory!!" He pulled at his cat ears.
Mee Mee took her turn. "MARS PLASMA BURST!"
The ionized sphere of gas sent the wet boy into convulsions as arcs of electricity danced about his form. It also finished shorting out the laser's control panel. The laser abruptly ceased firing.
Dexter wiped his brow as the laser beam about to bisect him flickered and vanished. "Whew! I can't believe one of the girls actually did something right for a change!"
Dee Dee stepped forward. "Now it's my turn!"
Dexter turned pale. "When will I learn that the fates are not to be tempted in such a flagrant manner?"
Dee Dee pirouetted and then spun her moon scepter through a full circle at arms length. "MOON SCEPTER ELIMINATION!"
Mandark gained consciousness only to see a giant beam of destructive force bearing down on him. "AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" He teleported out at the last second, not even pausing for a last flippant remark.
The beam continued on to destroy the transporter chamber, the Laser Lathe, the Tridimensional Chess Simulator, and everything else along the path of the beam. Dexter stood transfixed in horror at the destruction wreaked upon his precious lab.
The girls high-fived at their victory.
Dee Dee addressed her pals. "Good going Scouts! We won the battle! Unfortunately, the Man-Dark General escaped! We must increase our vigilance to catch him when he returns. We won't leave this lab until he is no longer a threat to the coming of the Crystal Pony Puff Palace!"
Dexter finally fainted in shock upon hearing his sister's proclamation.
Downstairs in the kitchen, Dexter and Dee Dee's mom frowned at the commotion going on upstairs. She poked her head into the living room and yelled up the stairs, "Dexter! Dee Dee! What is all that noise?!"
Dee Dee poked her head out through the hole in the wall and waved at her. "Hiiiii Mom! Me and Mee Mee and Lee Lee are protecting Dexter's secret laboratory from the Dark Forces of the Negaverse!"
Their mom returned to the kitchen. "That's nice, Dee Dee! Just keep the noise down! Lunch is almost ready."
Dee Dee waved one last time. "Okay Mom! We'll be right down!" She grabbed Dexter by the tail. "Okay, Scouts! It's lunch time!"
Mee Mee and Lee Lee started jumping up and down in glee. "YEA!!" They raced for the exit.
Dee Dee followed rapidly, still dragging Dexter by the tail.
That's it for chapter 2; see you next time as Sailor-D and the Scouts face off one last time with the Man-Dark General!