~A Once and Again Series~
Where Do We Go From Here?
Chapter 16//From the Top
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Grace picked up her pencil once again and stared down at the blank page in front of her. With a heavy sigh, she positioned the pencil over the first line... but no words would come to her. She couldn't think of what to say to him, to Coop. Grace dropped the pencil, and turned around, looking at her computer... maybe an email would be better?
Grace shook her head, knowing that it wouldn't work. She couldn't call him, write him, or email him... because she just didn't know what to say.
* * *
Eli lay on his bed motionless. He didn't understand why Grace had gotten mad... Eli had been asking a very important question. What if the baby was actually Coop's? What would that mean for him and Grace? After every up and down they've been through... could they make it through that...? They had been through worse, though. That was for sure.
* * *
[[[[Start of memory flashback....]]]]
"I think we should tell them, Eli," Grace said as Eli held her in his arms. They lay on his bed, ignoring the Sunday afternoon noises coming from the house. It was like they were in their own little world... no sisters around to bug them, no parents around to nag them... they were free. They were together.
So, why was Grace bringing up such a 'kill the mood' topic? Eli sighed, and Grace wiggled out of his arms, turning around to look him in the face. "I'm serious, Eli."
"I know you are," Eli said, looking away. "But, I also know that telling them is only going to make things hard..."
Grace sighed, "You think we can't handle 'hard'? We'll get through it together..."
Eli shook his head, "No, I don't want to, Grace."
Grace frowned, almost a pout really, and Eli had an urge to change his mind, and agree with her. But instead, he looked away. He just couldn't tell everyone. It would make things difficult, and there was even a chance that their parents would try to disallow them to see each other. Anyway it went; Eli knew it would be messy.
"I've got homework," Grace said, getting off the bed.
"Grace..." Eli pleaded, but Grace was already leaving his room.
Eli sighed, covering his face with his hands. Why couldn't Grace see that telling their parents would only make things more difficult on them? Why couldn't she just let a good thing be?
* * * (still memory flashback...) * * *
"Hi, Eli," Deanna said with a curious smile. "Whatcha doing out here?"
Eli pulled a pack of cigarettes from his coat pocket. He looked at Deanna, who was watching him with interest. "Don't tell anyone, okay?" Eli said, as he lifted one from the pack.
Deanna nodded, and offered her already lit cigarette to help Eli lit his. They then both put their cigarettes to their lips and took a drag. "I won't," Deanna promised as she exhaled smoke. "But, you know these things will kill ya."
"Actually, I'm more worried about my father killing me... or Lily," Eli added, thinking of what might happen if he and Grace told their parents about their involvement.
Deanna smiled, but didn't press him on explaining. That was something Eli really liked about her... she was easy-going. She didn't have to know everything. She was happy just being.
They were silent a few moments. It was a comfortable silence.
Deanna stubbed out her cigarette on the ground, and looked at Eli with a smile. "I heard you're in a band."
"Yeah," Eli said, taking another drag. He let the smoke billow on his tongue and down his throat. He exhaled it just as smoothly. "We actually have a gig on Friday."
"Cool," Deanna said, looking intently at him.
Eli looked back, seeing her beautiful green eyes wrapped in thick black eyelashes. His gaze dropped, as he finished up the last of the cigarette, running over her ample chest, her tiny waist, her curvy hips, and her long legs shown off by her tiny skirt. Eli dropped his cigarette as his gaze came back upwards running up back to her face.
Her smile for him at that moment was overwhelming. Eli wasn't conscious of anything but her beauty, even though his body remained in action, crushing the stub of the cigarette into the pavement. "Deanna," Eli said, as if really saying her name for the first time. It was a pretty name.
"Eli." Deanna said, her voice a mixture of amusement, joy, and sensuality. She knew he had been checking her out. She wondered what had taken him so long to see what was in front of him all this time.
"Did you want to come to our gig?" Eli asked, blinking. He fought to gain control of his thoughts. He tried to remind himself of Grace... but she seemed like a lost echo. So distant, so not here.
"Yeah, that'd be cool," Deanna said with a smile.
"Uh," Eli searched through his pockets and found a crumpled flyer for the show. "Here."
Deanna took it from him, their fingertips brushing as the paper switched between them. She studied the flyer and put it in her purse. "I'll be there."
"Great," Eli said, and his thoughts of Grace were growing stronger. He began to resent inviting Deanna to the gig... but what harm had he done, really? Grace would be there too...
"I think my ten minutes are up," Deanna said with a sigh. She turned to open the back entrance to Booklover's, but stopped and smiled at Eli.
Eli found himself smiling back, and then Deanna stepped inside, and out of his sight. Which was a good thing, right? Right... because Eli didn't want to do anything that could end up hurting Grace. He loved her too much.
* * * (still memory flashback)* * *
Grace burst out laughing as Coop tried to run after her, but tripped over a misplaced couch cushion.
"That's so not fair!" Coop cried, as he scrambled back up.
Grace skirted around the backside of the couch, maintaining her distance from him. "Hey, I can't help it if you're a klutz!"
Coop dodged around the back of the couch, but Grace was pretty quick, and was already half way across the small basement room.
"Grace!" Coop called, laughing. "I'll get you yet."
Grace had backed into the wrong corner... it being overrun by boxes of who-knows-what. Grace lost her advantage over Coop, and had to scurry away with him just inches behind her. Grace felt his hand graze her back and she quicken her pace, running smack into a wall....
Grace blinked in surprise, and laughed as she saw she hadn't run into a wall, but into Eli. Eli looked at her curiously, and Grace tried to explain, but was laughing too hard. She looked down, and her laughter continued as she saw Coop had fallen down to the floor. He was laughing too.
"Hey," Mark and Todd, the other two members of the band, said as they descend the stairs to Eli's basement room at his mom's house. They looked over at the two hysterically laughing people with interest. Eli shrugged, showing he didn't know what was up with them either.
"Coop!" Grace cried, when she had finally caught her breath, "You are so bad!"
Coop rolled over on the floor, his laughter fading away, and he looked up at her, "You asked for it."
Grace kicked him lightly with her foot. Coop tried to tickle her feet, but Grace danced away. She still wasn't exactly sure how the whole running/chasing thing had started. She and Coop had been left alone in the basement while Eli was upstairs talking to his mother, and suddenly they were both up, running around the room.
"Uh, practice, Coop," Eli reminded his friend, who was crawling after Grace on his belly. Grace was giggling. Eli looked at both of them like they were crazy, and helped Coop to his feet.
Grace sunk down onto the couch. She was like a silent partner of their band... she gave them input, and helped with lyrics and such. Eli tried over and over to coerce her into singing on a couple songs, but Grace wasn't ready for public humiliation.
The boys got everything set up, and launched into the first song.
Grace watched, and listened intently. She felt eyes on her, and she looked over at Coop. He smiled at her, and Grace smiled back, a little puzzled, but also liking in the way his eyes moved over her. Their gaze on each other held.
"Coop!" Eli cried, as the playing came to an abrupt stop. "Are you even with us?!" Eli asked in annoyance.
Coop pulled his eyes away from Grace, "Uh... sorry."
Eli grimaced and nodded, "From the top."
Grace looked down at her hands with discomfort. She felt... she didn't know what she felt, but that look in Coop's eyes.... it had been.... nice to have someone look at her like that.
* * * (Still memory flashback)* * *
"Hey," Deanna said, as she found Eli out back in the alleyway, smoking a cigarette.
Eli made to hide the cigarette, but saw it was only Deanna. Deanna stole it from his fingers, and took a drag. "I've got more," Eli said, reaching for the pack in his pocket.
Deanna shook her head, "I'm trying to quit." She handed back Eli his cigarette, and he took a drag.
"So, are still coming on Friday?" He asked, looking at Deanna out of the corner of his eyes. She was wearing a sexy little black dress today that showed off her body to its best.
"Yeah," Deanna's hand reached over and snuck the cigarette from his lips. She took another drag, relishing the feeling of the smoke filling her body. She looked at Eli guiltily, "I'm not good at this quitting thing, I guess."
Eli smiled. "There are worse things," He said with a sigh.
Deanna was silent, not pushing him for details. For that reason, Eli found himself telling her what was on his mind. "See, I have a girlfriend..." He started.
"You do?" Deanna said, and Eli found himself oddly pleased that she sounded disappointed... so Deanna WAS interested in him.
"Yeah, but I'm not sure if it's working out," Eli said, frowning. "She seems to want too much from me."
"That sucks," Deanna said, finishing off Eli's cigarette. Eli took out another one, lighting it.
"It does," Eli said, taking a drag. "And the thing is... she's been a big part of my life, and I love her, I do..."
"But..." Deanna said for him.
"But she just wants too much from me... and when I can't give that to her, she's hurt," Eli sighed.
"Maybe she's not the one for you?" Deanna said with a suggestive look.
Eli was silent, hashing over her words. He loved Grace, he did... but maybe their relationship was just TOO complicated.
"Or maybe you just need some fun," Deanna said, stealing the cigarette from his hand. She took a long drag and then... pushed her lips against his. Eli's mouth opened a bit automatically and he felt smoke wafting into his mouth from hers.
Deanna drew back, and Eli released the smoke into the air. He stared at her with surprise.
Deanna stared back. "Will your girlfriend be at your gig?"
"I think so," Eli said, although at that moment he wasn't sure of anything, but the way her lips had felt against his... soft, smooth, fiery.
"Try to get her to stay home," Deanna said with a wink, and then she was gone.
Eli stood there, his mouth slightly ajar as he tried to comprehend what had just happened.
* * * (still memory flashback)* * *
"Eli..." Grace said, as she paused in the doorway to the kitchen. Things between them lately hadn't been that great. Grace felt bad for pressuring him to tell everyone about them, but she just hated lying and sneaking around all the time.
"Hey," Eli said with a distracted smile.
Grace walked closer. The two of the studied each other awkwardly for a few moments.
"I'm sorry," Grace finally said. "I've been kind of on you a lot about telling our parents."
"I'm sorry too," Eli said. Grace smiled, relieved.
"Gracie!" Lily cried happily, coming in from the side door. She had forgotten Grace's request last year of not calling her Gracie anymore, and had resorted back to her old ways. She clutched a stack of envelopes. "You got a letter from Edgewood!"
"Really?" Grace said, curiously. She had applied to the small liberal arts college in Madison, but hadn't expected to hear back so soon. She took the envelope from her mother who was practically beaming.
Grace opened it, knowing her mother would settle for no less than Grace reading it in front of her. Grace scanned the letter, "I got in."
"I knew you would!" Lily hugged her enthusiastically.
"Isn't that college in Madison?" Eli spoke up.
Lily finally released Grace, and Grace smiled, "Yeah it is."
"Oh," Eli said. Grace was going to college in Madison?? It was the first Eli had heard of this.
Rick and Jessie came into the room, and Lily told them the news.
"That's great, Grace!" Rick said.
"I still don't know if I want to go there, though," Grace hedged. "I mean, I haven't even visited the campus."
"You haven't?" Rick said in surprise. A smile spread across his face, "Why don't we go on Friday? You could even miss school for it..." Rick turned and looked at Jessie, "You too."
"Me?" Jessie said in surprise.
"It's never too early to check out colleges," Rick said, wrapping an arm around his daughter. "Besides, you get to miss school."
"I do like missing school," Jessie agreed. "Okay, I'll go!"
Eli faded into the background as they began making plans of their trip. He was still shaken about the idea of Grace going to college in Madison. He hadn't expected that... he probably soon have seen it coming, but he just didn't think of it. He had assumed she'd go to State, which was only minutes away, and still live at home, and they could continue their secret relationship right under everyone's noses....
But it looked like things weren't going the way he had planned.
* * * * * *
Where Do We Go From Here?
Chapter 16//From the Top
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Grace picked up her pencil once again and stared down at the blank page in front of her. With a heavy sigh, she positioned the pencil over the first line... but no words would come to her. She couldn't think of what to say to him, to Coop. Grace dropped the pencil, and turned around, looking at her computer... maybe an email would be better?
Grace shook her head, knowing that it wouldn't work. She couldn't call him, write him, or email him... because she just didn't know what to say.
* * *
Eli lay on his bed motionless. He didn't understand why Grace had gotten mad... Eli had been asking a very important question. What if the baby was actually Coop's? What would that mean for him and Grace? After every up and down they've been through... could they make it through that...? They had been through worse, though. That was for sure.
* * *
[[[[Start of memory flashback....]]]]
"I think we should tell them, Eli," Grace said as Eli held her in his arms. They lay on his bed, ignoring the Sunday afternoon noises coming from the house. It was like they were in their own little world... no sisters around to bug them, no parents around to nag them... they were free. They were together.
So, why was Grace bringing up such a 'kill the mood' topic? Eli sighed, and Grace wiggled out of his arms, turning around to look him in the face. "I'm serious, Eli."
"I know you are," Eli said, looking away. "But, I also know that telling them is only going to make things hard..."
Grace sighed, "You think we can't handle 'hard'? We'll get through it together..."
Eli shook his head, "No, I don't want to, Grace."
Grace frowned, almost a pout really, and Eli had an urge to change his mind, and agree with her. But instead, he looked away. He just couldn't tell everyone. It would make things difficult, and there was even a chance that their parents would try to disallow them to see each other. Anyway it went; Eli knew it would be messy.
"I've got homework," Grace said, getting off the bed.
"Grace..." Eli pleaded, but Grace was already leaving his room.
Eli sighed, covering his face with his hands. Why couldn't Grace see that telling their parents would only make things more difficult on them? Why couldn't she just let a good thing be?
* * * (still memory flashback...) * * *
"Hi, Eli," Deanna said with a curious smile. "Whatcha doing out here?"
Eli pulled a pack of cigarettes from his coat pocket. He looked at Deanna, who was watching him with interest. "Don't tell anyone, okay?" Eli said, as he lifted one from the pack.
Deanna nodded, and offered her already lit cigarette to help Eli lit his. They then both put their cigarettes to their lips and took a drag. "I won't," Deanna promised as she exhaled smoke. "But, you know these things will kill ya."
"Actually, I'm more worried about my father killing me... or Lily," Eli added, thinking of what might happen if he and Grace told their parents about their involvement.
Deanna smiled, but didn't press him on explaining. That was something Eli really liked about her... she was easy-going. She didn't have to know everything. She was happy just being.
They were silent a few moments. It was a comfortable silence.
Deanna stubbed out her cigarette on the ground, and looked at Eli with a smile. "I heard you're in a band."
"Yeah," Eli said, taking another drag. He let the smoke billow on his tongue and down his throat. He exhaled it just as smoothly. "We actually have a gig on Friday."
"Cool," Deanna said, looking intently at him.
Eli looked back, seeing her beautiful green eyes wrapped in thick black eyelashes. His gaze dropped, as he finished up the last of the cigarette, running over her ample chest, her tiny waist, her curvy hips, and her long legs shown off by her tiny skirt. Eli dropped his cigarette as his gaze came back upwards running up back to her face.
Her smile for him at that moment was overwhelming. Eli wasn't conscious of anything but her beauty, even though his body remained in action, crushing the stub of the cigarette into the pavement. "Deanna," Eli said, as if really saying her name for the first time. It was a pretty name.
"Eli." Deanna said, her voice a mixture of amusement, joy, and sensuality. She knew he had been checking her out. She wondered what had taken him so long to see what was in front of him all this time.
"Did you want to come to our gig?" Eli asked, blinking. He fought to gain control of his thoughts. He tried to remind himself of Grace... but she seemed like a lost echo. So distant, so not here.
"Yeah, that'd be cool," Deanna said with a smile.
"Uh," Eli searched through his pockets and found a crumpled flyer for the show. "Here."
Deanna took it from him, their fingertips brushing as the paper switched between them. She studied the flyer and put it in her purse. "I'll be there."
"Great," Eli said, and his thoughts of Grace were growing stronger. He began to resent inviting Deanna to the gig... but what harm had he done, really? Grace would be there too...
"I think my ten minutes are up," Deanna said with a sigh. She turned to open the back entrance to Booklover's, but stopped and smiled at Eli.
Eli found himself smiling back, and then Deanna stepped inside, and out of his sight. Which was a good thing, right? Right... because Eli didn't want to do anything that could end up hurting Grace. He loved her too much.
* * * (still memory flashback)* * *
Grace burst out laughing as Coop tried to run after her, but tripped over a misplaced couch cushion.
"That's so not fair!" Coop cried, as he scrambled back up.
Grace skirted around the backside of the couch, maintaining her distance from him. "Hey, I can't help it if you're a klutz!"
Coop dodged around the back of the couch, but Grace was pretty quick, and was already half way across the small basement room.
"Grace!" Coop called, laughing. "I'll get you yet."
Grace had backed into the wrong corner... it being overrun by boxes of who-knows-what. Grace lost her advantage over Coop, and had to scurry away with him just inches behind her. Grace felt his hand graze her back and she quicken her pace, running smack into a wall....
Grace blinked in surprise, and laughed as she saw she hadn't run into a wall, but into Eli. Eli looked at her curiously, and Grace tried to explain, but was laughing too hard. She looked down, and her laughter continued as she saw Coop had fallen down to the floor. He was laughing too.
"Hey," Mark and Todd, the other two members of the band, said as they descend the stairs to Eli's basement room at his mom's house. They looked over at the two hysterically laughing people with interest. Eli shrugged, showing he didn't know what was up with them either.
"Coop!" Grace cried, when she had finally caught her breath, "You are so bad!"
Coop rolled over on the floor, his laughter fading away, and he looked up at her, "You asked for it."
Grace kicked him lightly with her foot. Coop tried to tickle her feet, but Grace danced away. She still wasn't exactly sure how the whole running/chasing thing had started. She and Coop had been left alone in the basement while Eli was upstairs talking to his mother, and suddenly they were both up, running around the room.
"Uh, practice, Coop," Eli reminded his friend, who was crawling after Grace on his belly. Grace was giggling. Eli looked at both of them like they were crazy, and helped Coop to his feet.
Grace sunk down onto the couch. She was like a silent partner of their band... she gave them input, and helped with lyrics and such. Eli tried over and over to coerce her into singing on a couple songs, but Grace wasn't ready for public humiliation.
The boys got everything set up, and launched into the first song.
Grace watched, and listened intently. She felt eyes on her, and she looked over at Coop. He smiled at her, and Grace smiled back, a little puzzled, but also liking in the way his eyes moved over her. Their gaze on each other held.
"Coop!" Eli cried, as the playing came to an abrupt stop. "Are you even with us?!" Eli asked in annoyance.
Coop pulled his eyes away from Grace, "Uh... sorry."
Eli grimaced and nodded, "From the top."
Grace looked down at her hands with discomfort. She felt... she didn't know what she felt, but that look in Coop's eyes.... it had been.... nice to have someone look at her like that.
* * * (Still memory flashback)* * *
"Hey," Deanna said, as she found Eli out back in the alleyway, smoking a cigarette.
Eli made to hide the cigarette, but saw it was only Deanna. Deanna stole it from his fingers, and took a drag. "I've got more," Eli said, reaching for the pack in his pocket.
Deanna shook her head, "I'm trying to quit." She handed back Eli his cigarette, and he took a drag.
"So, are still coming on Friday?" He asked, looking at Deanna out of the corner of his eyes. She was wearing a sexy little black dress today that showed off her body to its best.
"Yeah," Deanna's hand reached over and snuck the cigarette from his lips. She took another drag, relishing the feeling of the smoke filling her body. She looked at Eli guiltily, "I'm not good at this quitting thing, I guess."
Eli smiled. "There are worse things," He said with a sigh.
Deanna was silent, not pushing him for details. For that reason, Eli found himself telling her what was on his mind. "See, I have a girlfriend..." He started.
"You do?" Deanna said, and Eli found himself oddly pleased that she sounded disappointed... so Deanna WAS interested in him.
"Yeah, but I'm not sure if it's working out," Eli said, frowning. "She seems to want too much from me."
"That sucks," Deanna said, finishing off Eli's cigarette. Eli took out another one, lighting it.
"It does," Eli said, taking a drag. "And the thing is... she's been a big part of my life, and I love her, I do..."
"But..." Deanna said for him.
"But she just wants too much from me... and when I can't give that to her, she's hurt," Eli sighed.
"Maybe she's not the one for you?" Deanna said with a suggestive look.
Eli was silent, hashing over her words. He loved Grace, he did... but maybe their relationship was just TOO complicated.
"Or maybe you just need some fun," Deanna said, stealing the cigarette from his hand. She took a long drag and then... pushed her lips against his. Eli's mouth opened a bit automatically and he felt smoke wafting into his mouth from hers.
Deanna drew back, and Eli released the smoke into the air. He stared at her with surprise.
Deanna stared back. "Will your girlfriend be at your gig?"
"I think so," Eli said, although at that moment he wasn't sure of anything, but the way her lips had felt against his... soft, smooth, fiery.
"Try to get her to stay home," Deanna said with a wink, and then she was gone.
Eli stood there, his mouth slightly ajar as he tried to comprehend what had just happened.
* * * (still memory flashback)* * *
"Eli..." Grace said, as she paused in the doorway to the kitchen. Things between them lately hadn't been that great. Grace felt bad for pressuring him to tell everyone about them, but she just hated lying and sneaking around all the time.
"Hey," Eli said with a distracted smile.
Grace walked closer. The two of the studied each other awkwardly for a few moments.
"I'm sorry," Grace finally said. "I've been kind of on you a lot about telling our parents."
"I'm sorry too," Eli said. Grace smiled, relieved.
"Gracie!" Lily cried happily, coming in from the side door. She had forgotten Grace's request last year of not calling her Gracie anymore, and had resorted back to her old ways. She clutched a stack of envelopes. "You got a letter from Edgewood!"
"Really?" Grace said, curiously. She had applied to the small liberal arts college in Madison, but hadn't expected to hear back so soon. She took the envelope from her mother who was practically beaming.
Grace opened it, knowing her mother would settle for no less than Grace reading it in front of her. Grace scanned the letter, "I got in."
"I knew you would!" Lily hugged her enthusiastically.
"Isn't that college in Madison?" Eli spoke up.
Lily finally released Grace, and Grace smiled, "Yeah it is."
"Oh," Eli said. Grace was going to college in Madison?? It was the first Eli had heard of this.
Rick and Jessie came into the room, and Lily told them the news.
"That's great, Grace!" Rick said.
"I still don't know if I want to go there, though," Grace hedged. "I mean, I haven't even visited the campus."
"You haven't?" Rick said in surprise. A smile spread across his face, "Why don't we go on Friday? You could even miss school for it..." Rick turned and looked at Jessie, "You too."
"Me?" Jessie said in surprise.
"It's never too early to check out colleges," Rick said, wrapping an arm around his daughter. "Besides, you get to miss school."
"I do like missing school," Jessie agreed. "Okay, I'll go!"
Eli faded into the background as they began making plans of their trip. He was still shaken about the idea of Grace going to college in Madison. He hadn't expected that... he probably soon have seen it coming, but he just didn't think of it. He had assumed she'd go to State, which was only minutes away, and still live at home, and they could continue their secret relationship right under everyone's noses....
But it looked like things weren't going the way he had planned.
* * * * * *