How Far?

Chapter Fifteen: Feel

Notes: Now, instead of Melina's POV, it's going to be in 3rd person.

Gordo just stood there in complete silence and astonishment. He stood in front of Melina's lifeless body which lay on the floor. He tried so hard to keep from having a panic attack right then and there. He tried to absorb everything that had just happened. Melina had come into his house, nearly missed killing him, confessed feelings for him, and shot herself, which most definitely killed her. He bent down and ran his hand down her arm and felt her smooth skin. He ran to the phone that hung on the wall and dialed a number.

"Hello? 911?"

~*~*~

Jo McGuire, Matt McGuire, and Lizzie McGuire sat in a blue van, watching the road pass by. Jo carefully steered the van as Matt listened to his CD player and Lizzie was reading "The Crucible".

Matt was lost in the sounds of the guitars and male singers as he stared out the window. He had been deep in thought of what he was going to do. He wanted to surprise Melina by bringing over some of her favorite movies, which consisted of "Cocktail", "Punch Drunk Love", "XXX", and "Chicago". He knew Melina had been depressed the last few days and wanted to make her feel better.

Lizzie, on the other hand, wanted to try and mend things up with Gordo. She was going to lie to him, telling him that she wasn't seeing Ethan anymore.

"Mom, can we go to McDonald's? I want to get Melina some chicken mcnuggets. She loves those things," Matt asked his mother.

"Ooh! And I can get Gordo some fries," Lizzie squealed happily.

"Fine, Fine," she chuckled. "As long as I can get myself a McFlurry."

~*~

"And that's what really happened," an African American police officer asked as he cocked an eyebrow at Gordo.

"Yes, sir," he sighed. "I swear that it's the truth. My parents only own one gun, and that's a stun gun, for self defense, in case of a break in."

"Uh huh, I see young man. I'm really sorry about this. Do you know anything about her parents?"

"Her dad died when she was younger and she has a sister named Kelly. My friend Miranda, has a friend named, Parker, used to baby-sit her sister. I'm sorry I don't know anymore sir."

The man shook his head and muttered something as he went over to the television and watched it for a minute.

"The Royal Tenebaums, huh? My favorite movie of all time. I loved the collaboration between Wes Anderson and Owen Wilson," he smiled.

"I personally liked Bottle Rocket, which inspired me to watch this," he chuckled.

Gordo nodded at the man and looked down at the floor where Melina's body once was a short time ago. The scene of her shooting herself flashed before his eyes again and again. As much as he tried to clear that horrifying image out of his memory, he just couldn't, it was burned in his brain.

"Are you okay, kid," the officer said as he looked at Gordo who had a horrified look on his face.

"What's your definition of okay," he said as he stomped off towards his room.

~*~

Matt took a sip of his soda as he switched his Simple Plan CD with his Bowling for Soup one. He smiled that in a few minutes he was going to Melina's house to try and cheer her up.

"If you were me then you'd be screaming someone shoot me, as I fell miserably, trying to get the girl all the bad boys want," he sang along to the rock song. Besides watching movies, he was also going to ask Melina to homecoming. His face gleamed with happiness.

Lizzie stared out the windows and caught sight of the flashes of red and blue flashing lights in the distance. Her heart skipped a beat and her mind only focused on one thing. Gordo. What if something had happened to Gordo? She would lose the one person who even cared about her. Ethan didn't care about her. Ethan cared about getting laid. She gritted her teeth and sighed angrily at herself for being such an idiot for even thinking of the idea of cheating on Gordo. Sometimes, you just *don't* think.

"Um, honey, aren't those flashing lights near Gordo's house," Jo asked worried.

"Y-yeah, I think they are," Lizzie said nervously as she twirled her hair nervously around her finger.

"Who cares," Matt asked sarcastically. "I have more important things to worry about!"

"Kids," Jo sighed. "Please stop fighting. Matt, you're going to get to Melina's house eventually and Lizzie, stop making a mountain out of a mole hill."

The kids sighed and looked out separate windows. The funny thing about it was that Lizzie wasn't making a mountain out of a molehill.

~*~

Gordo sat on his bed with his head in his hands, thinking about what he had done. Guilt consumed his body as he curled up in a ball and stared at the plain white wall. His parents would find out eventually about the whole thing and talk about death and guilt and lots of psycho babble bull shit.

He remembered the look in Melina's eyes. Her face gave off an angry expression, while her eyes looked very different. Her eyes were filled with hurt and loneliness and a cry for help. His hands started shaking and his stomach was tied in many knots. He told himself to get a grip. The words weren't soothing like a mother's warm touch; they just made him feel even worse. He had always had a clean conscience when he was younger, even if he lied about not eating his vegetables or anything very minute, he would feel so guilty. The difference was, eating your vegetables wasn't really that life shattering, but knowing that maybe he could have taken the gun away from Melina or prevented her death in any other way; he would have done that in a split second.

Maybe no one could have prevented it, except for Melina. Gordo didn't know she wasn't wrapped too tight, in fact he didn't really know her that much. Yeah, she was his girlfriend's brother's best friend, but that's like saying that Adam Sandler is your brother's professor's wife's second cousin. You know *of* them, but you really don't know them. Sure, he had said they were mutual friends, but he wanted to make her feel important. He knew that when he was a freshman, the best thing was to have a connection with an upperclassman.

"Maybe I shouldn't be so nice anymore," he mumbled to himself.

Ring.

Gordo heard the doorbell ring and got up clumsily and stretched. He walked tiredly towards the door and opened it up.

He saw Lizzie, Matt, and Jo standing on the porch, drenched in rain. The vision of Melina standing sadly and wet in the doorway flickered into his mind.

"Gordo, are you okay, we saw flashing lights and we were wondering if you were alright," Jo said nervously.

"Can we hurry up here? I want to go to Melina's," Matt exclaimed impatiently.

Gordo put his hand against his face and looked away from the McGuire's.

"You better sit down," he sighed.

Lizzie and Jo scurried over to the couch while Matt sat in the black leather chair. They all looked Gordo as if he were the most interesting person in the world.

He sighed, "This is going to sound unbelievable, but here it is anyway. Melina came to my house, saying that she got into a fight with her mom, so I let her in. At the time I was watching a movie, and I went up to get a drink. The next thing I know, Melina's standing there pointing a gun at me and she ends up shooting a vase. She then proceeded to tell me that she was in love with me, and then she started going on about something. Then, she picked up the gun that she had dropped and shot herself. According to the paramedics she died from the self inflicted wound to the head."

Matt's face had no expression. He tried to absorb everything from Melina being dead to Melina being in love with Gordo. The name stung his tongue when he said it. If Gordo wasn't alive, Melina wouldn't be in love him and she'd be alive. He blamed Gordo. Everyone just loved Gordo. His sister loved him, along with Melina and other girls. Gordo was great. Gordo could do no wrong. Gordo was perfect, especially to Melina.

Lizzie looked at her hands and sighed. She felt sorry for Gordo. She kind of figured Melina would go psycho, but she didn't expect her to go psycho on Gordo.

"Is there anything we can do to help," Jo asked sympathetically.

"Yeah, go to hell and rot," Matt said scornfully as he walked towards the door.

"Matt," Jo reprehended.

"I'm sorry mom, how would you feel if your best friend got murdered and was in love with her murderer," he asked sarcastically.

"Matt, Melina committed suicide, it's not like Gordo told her to go shoot herself or even pull the trigger. It just happened. It's no one's fault," Lizzie defended.

"If Gordo wasn't alive, my best friend would be. Isn't it strange how things can work out like that," Matt said as he turned the doorknob. "I'll be in the car."

Matt slammed the door angrily as Gordo, Lizzie, and Jo stared at the door.

"Gordo, I'm really sorry, he's just lying," Jo reassured him.

"He's right though, if I wasn't alive, Melina would be," he trailed off.

"Gordo—

Lizzie was cut off by his words, "Can you just do me a favor and go? I need to deal with this by myself."

Lizzie held out the McDonald's bag, "We brought you food. If you want, you can have Melina's. They're chicken McNuggets."

"I'm not hungry. If you want to help, just leave me alone," He said madly.

"C'mon honey, let's go," Jo said as she laid a hand on her daughter's shoulder.

"Mom-

"He needs to be alone," she said as she opened the door.

They walked out together and Gordo closed the door.

He looked up at the ceiling and sighed, "Why couldn't I have not been born?"

[A/N: Did you like this? Is it still okay with the third person POV? Tell me your thoughts in a review, thank you.]