A/N: oki doki… another chappy… this one's a bit longer (at least to me because I have to do all the typing… yes, that's right… it's my job once again) this one starts in on the shippier stuff….. Again, this is still sickbay… but NO WORRIES… this is the LAST sickbay chappy!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! Before my sis read this scene I told this: RED ALERT: MAJOR CHEESY SHIPPY-NESS STARTS THIS CHAPPY: PROCEED WITH CAUTION… she agreed, so I'm telling you and you can decide whether that fits or not…. And NO this isn't the SHIPPIEST chappy, but this is where it all begins (basically) oh, and this is a BIT (ok, a lot according to both me and several readers) long-winded.... i REALLY don't like this chappy.... but i wrote it several times and was never happy with it, so this is what i stuck with cuz it was the best one... that's right folks... there were WORSE drafts........ anyway read up
Chapter 31
"Hey," Trip said as he walked into sickbay. "Ya ready t' leave yet?"
She seemed confused.
"Doc told me ya woke up, so I decided t' come see ya. My shift ended 'bout an hour ago," he clarified. "An' I was jokin' about leavin'," he added, which ended her confusion.
"I see," she said, showing that she now understood.
"So…" he began. Noting that she was still lying down, he asked," How ya feelin'? Side still botherin' ya?"
"Yes. However, the pain is slowly subsiding," she told him.
"Want somethin' t' eat or something?" he asked, changing the subject.
She curled her nose at this. "You have personally served me more food than most humans consume in a week. I certainly don't need any more."
Noting the subtle anger in her statement, he quickly took it back. "Sorry. I was just offerin'. I don't think I need t' remind you again that you're eatin' for--"
"No, Commander. You don't," she interrupted.
Noting the embarrassment and animosity in her voice, he suddenly felt terrible. 'Why the hell did I say that?' he asked himself silently. "Look… I'm sorry, T'Pol. I know ya don't like t' think about it or talk about it… 'specially with me. I just--"
"I accept you apology, Commander," she interrupted for the second time. "And you are correct. I prefer not to discuss my condition with anyone except when necessary."
A long silence followed. This had happened on many occasions over the last week. They would argue, apologize, and stare at a wall or a ceiling, watching every speck of dust and every tiny crack or scratch… doing anything to avoid the other's gaze. This time, though, neither of them was busy counting imperfections in the metal. Instead, they were merely staring at each other, just as they had done so many times over the past week.
They were practically in a trance, not even realizing that they were gazing into each other's eyes almost distantly. They did it almost subconsciously. They had done it before that week, also subconsciously, on several occasions, albeit not as often or prolonged. And normally there was nothing special about it. They were usually just string across the bridge and happened to catch each other's eyes. But the past few days had been different. Their gazes weren't normal. It hadn't been random, and it had been different.
There was no way to even describe it. They didn't even notice it most of the time, which was odd because they did it so often for such long periods of time that one would assume they noticed but merely didn't want to stop. Nevertheless, they continued without even perceiving their actions.
"So… anyway," Trip said at long last, only detecting subconsciously that time had passed.
Once they realized what they had just done, both were fairly uncomfortable and T'Pol had to collect herself quickly in order to respond to his sudden comment. "Yes, Commander?! She asked, obviously having even less to speak about than he had.
"So… when d'ya think you'll be ready t' get outta here… seriously. Ya can't lay in sickbay for the rest of your life…"
"I am aware of that, Commander," she said, making certain to look confident even though her voice betrayed her uncertainty. "And I do believe I will be able to… face my parents… tomorrow. I don't know when I can face Koss' parents. I already insulted them by canceling my wedding plans. This would only increase their… agitation."
"Well I'm sure you'll find a way t' tell 'em sooner or later," he told her reassuringly.
Unfortunately, his attempt didn't appear to work. "Perhaps," she replied coolly.
"Ya know, I can go with ya when ya tell your parents. If it'll help I mean. or even if ya don't think it'll help, there's always just bein' there for moral support. Ya know, but if ya--"
"Thank you, Commander," she said sincerely. "I would appreciate your… moral support. However, if you were to become angry, it would only escalate a delicate situation."
He held his hands up defensively. "I know. I'll try not t' let 'em rattle my cage too bad. I don't wanna make this any worse. This is all my fault in the first place-- like you've told me 'bout half a dozen times. I guess I just--"
"Commander!" she interrupted again. "You're rambling out of nervousness. Please stop."
'Ramblin'?' he thought. 'Damn, guess I was ramblin.' "Didn't mean t' make ya uncomfortable or anything, but well… here I go again…"
"Perhaps we should change the topic of conversation," she suggested.
"Yeah. Sounds like a good idea. What d'ya wanna talk about?"
Neither of them really had any thoughts, and Trip was about ready to suggest that he leave and return later. T'Pol realized this, and she didn't want him to leave her alone. She quickly came up with a topic. "Perhaps you could tell me about the crew's activities over the past week." He looked confused at her topic choice, so she decided to clarify." I've been incapacitated for the last five days, and therefore have no knowledge of the events which have taken place beyond the… unfortunate events in my own life."
Trip, not wanting to return to their previous topic of discussion, decided that he could settle for that reasoning. "Well…" he began. "I guess I could start with the Cap'n and work my way down." She nodded and he considered where to begin. Well, the Cap'n's been tryin' t get ya outta this, so he hasn't really been doin ' much else." Once again feeling an uncomfortable shift in his topic, he continued. "And, well, I guess I don't need t' tell ya about you or me…so, well--"
"Commander," she stopped him, sounding much stronger than she looked.
"Yeah?"
"I would like to hear what you have done." This surprised him visually and T'Pol could see that he didn't wan to tell her what he'd done, but she refused to let him avoid it. She wanted to know why he'd been in sickbay so often, why he'd gazed at her for many uncomfortable minutes, and why he was suddenly so protective of her, yet defensive at the same time. She knew that if he didn't answer her questions this subtle way, she would be willing to ask him more directly, even though she hoped inwardly that she didn't have to. It would most likely elevate the ever-present tension levels between them to possibly unimaginable levels. She certainly wasn't prepared for that, and knew that he wasn't either.
"Whad'ya mean, T'Pol?" he asked, obviously rattled. "Ya know exactly what I've been done practically every minute over the past week! I've been with you!" he was more surprised than anything, but was also slightly agitated. About what she didn't know.
She replied, her usual Vulcan calm holding even after his many emotional remarks. "That is incorrect, Commander. You have left on several occasions. First, you left me in my quarters several times. Then we left each other in the corridor." he winced slightly at this remark, though he tried to hide it. "And you told me yourself that you have reported for duty at the regular time each day, only coming here after your shifts are complete."
Obviously ready to protest, he pointed his finger angrily at her. But his face immediately changed into a relinquishing sigh and he dropped his hand back down. But instead of going back to hi lap where it had been. He used collected her right hand in his left, not daring use his right hand now. The Doctor had placed a brace over it a few hours after the mess hall talk.
Trip placed his elbow on the edge of the bed, his hand still holding hers.
"Alright," he said with a sigh at last. "Whad'ya wanna know?"
"I've told you. I would like to know what you have done when I was… not present," she told him, not to even trying to free her hand as he expected her to.
"Well, I don' know where t' start, but I guess…" he paused, not knowing exactly where she was coming from or why she was inquiring about his personal life. He stared off into a space, in a thoughtful daze again.
"Commander!" she said for the second time.
"Oh sorry. I was just thinking'. Ya know, so I know what t' say an' all…" 'An' so I can make sure I don't tell 'er everything like I would if I just started ramblin'. "Anyway, where was I… oh yeah. Well, I'll just start when ya ditched me in the corridor." At this, she decided that a more appropriate listening position would be helpful ao that she could watch him for subtle changes which could help explain his strange actions. Not to mention the reason for his holding of her hand. It didn't make sense to her, but somehow she appreciated it. She wasn't sure why.
She tried to sit up. But realized that it was far too painful and laid back down. He noticed her trouble and decided to help her. "Here, maybe I can lift up the back of this thing so ya can sit up without it hurtin' so bad." At this idea, she gratefully nodded and he released her hand gently so that he could raise the back of the biobed enough for physical comfort. Once he had risen it about 45o upward, she indicated that he could stop and he went back to his seat.
Once again, he grabbed her hand, although this time he was gazing at her again and she didn't know why. She only knew that, for some reason, she was staring back at him. She tried several times, unsuccessfully, to break their, but nothing worked.
They just sat there, Trip not continuing his story, until they realized that nearly fifteen minutes had passed. Trip, suddenly unsure of himself, finally broke shared near-unblinking gaze. She expected him to also release her hand and walk out of the room based on his obvious level of embarrassment, but he didn't, to T'Pol's surprise. She certainly didn't mind his presence, even if she acted as though she did. Her acting fooled everyone, to her relief. Everyone, that is, except Trip. He knew that they were friends, and that they always helped each when the other was in trouble. And T'Pol was definitely in trouble now. 'He attempted to help me as a friend, yet I fought with him. I allowed my emotional control to falter and argued angrily with him,' she thought.
"So," Trip said at last. "Where was I?"
"In your story or your romantic advances?" Even as the words left her mouth, she could not believe that she'd just asked him that question. She'd let a possibly offensive attempt at humor slip out. Perhaps she was spending too much time with him. After all, he wasn't actually making advances, was he?
Trip couldn't believe it either, as his face turned a distinct shade of red and he dropped her hand, backing away a few inches reflexively. "Well which would ya rather I continued?" he asked her playfully. Was he implying that he *had* been making romantic gestures? She couldn't be sure. He could, after all, be joking.
Realizing not only her own stupidity, but his embarrassment as well, she quickly responded. "I apologize, Commander. I was not implying that you were actually--"
His face reddened further, he stood up, and he walked away so that she couldn't see him. "Actually, you're right. I didn't notice 'til ya said somethin', but I was. So I'm the one who should be apologizin.' You had every right to accuse me of that. I guess I kinda deserve your criticism an' all. I mean, what kinda friend an' gentleman grabs a lady's hand an' starts starin' all googly-eyes at 'er like that. No one that I ever--"
"Commander!" she scolded for what seemed like the hundredth time that day. "You claimed that you would stop rambling. However you are now doing it once again." Although her voice had an air of strict criticism, inwardly she was simply surprised at his complete and utter embarrassment about such a topic, not to mention his out-and-out confession. She was surprised that he would admit to such accidental accusations. She knew that he didn't actually have any romantic interest in her, nor did she in him. But humans, she'd found, tended to act on instinct and their subconscious-- even if consciously they would never act in the same manner. She'd concluded that he had been acting in that way several minutes earlier. Usually humans denied any action which they carried out when this occurred. However, Commander Tucker, one of the most defensive and irrational that she'd met, was now admitting to such things. The confusion was enough to make her head spin, and it nearly was.
The Commander simply stood there and hung his head for what seemed like hours, but was only a few minutes. He wanted to look at everything but her and his face was still red from embarrassment and his hands where shaking from his nervousness.
T'Pol sat there staring at him unblinking and said in a much softer tone than before, "Commander?" This startled Trip enough to knock him out of his daze.
"Yeah," he said, appearing to find part of the floor very intriguing.
"Would you like to talk about something else?"
He looked overjoyed at this prospect, jogging back to his seat and plopping down.. "Sounds great. Whad'ya wanna talk about?"
"Perhaps something that does not involve either of us, so as not to return to another… uncomfortable conservation."
"That's the best idea I've heard all day," he said in relief. "How 'bout… uh… you know of any good singer?"
"No."
"How 'bout actors?"
"No."
"Artists?"
"No." Trip sighed. This was going to be a long night.
A/N2: I don't have anything to say… just R&R as always… thank you for reviewing so far BTW….. Oh, and just because I feel like making an official count, this story has a total of 103 reviews!!!! YAY!!!!! I know, that DOES NOT mean that this is the best story ever, but I DO appreciate how many people are reading this and enjoying it, even if it IS just the same people reviewing over and over again…. Thank you all!!!!!!
Chapter 31
"Hey," Trip said as he walked into sickbay. "Ya ready t' leave yet?"
She seemed confused.
"Doc told me ya woke up, so I decided t' come see ya. My shift ended 'bout an hour ago," he clarified. "An' I was jokin' about leavin'," he added, which ended her confusion.
"I see," she said, showing that she now understood.
"So…" he began. Noting that she was still lying down, he asked," How ya feelin'? Side still botherin' ya?"
"Yes. However, the pain is slowly subsiding," she told him.
"Want somethin' t' eat or something?" he asked, changing the subject.
She curled her nose at this. "You have personally served me more food than most humans consume in a week. I certainly don't need any more."
Noting the subtle anger in her statement, he quickly took it back. "Sorry. I was just offerin'. I don't think I need t' remind you again that you're eatin' for--"
"No, Commander. You don't," she interrupted.
Noting the embarrassment and animosity in her voice, he suddenly felt terrible. 'Why the hell did I say that?' he asked himself silently. "Look… I'm sorry, T'Pol. I know ya don't like t' think about it or talk about it… 'specially with me. I just--"
"I accept you apology, Commander," she interrupted for the second time. "And you are correct. I prefer not to discuss my condition with anyone except when necessary."
A long silence followed. This had happened on many occasions over the last week. They would argue, apologize, and stare at a wall or a ceiling, watching every speck of dust and every tiny crack or scratch… doing anything to avoid the other's gaze. This time, though, neither of them was busy counting imperfections in the metal. Instead, they were merely staring at each other, just as they had done so many times over the past week.
They were practically in a trance, not even realizing that they were gazing into each other's eyes almost distantly. They did it almost subconsciously. They had done it before that week, also subconsciously, on several occasions, albeit not as often or prolonged. And normally there was nothing special about it. They were usually just string across the bridge and happened to catch each other's eyes. But the past few days had been different. Their gazes weren't normal. It hadn't been random, and it had been different.
There was no way to even describe it. They didn't even notice it most of the time, which was odd because they did it so often for such long periods of time that one would assume they noticed but merely didn't want to stop. Nevertheless, they continued without even perceiving their actions.
"So… anyway," Trip said at long last, only detecting subconsciously that time had passed.
Once they realized what they had just done, both were fairly uncomfortable and T'Pol had to collect herself quickly in order to respond to his sudden comment. "Yes, Commander?! She asked, obviously having even less to speak about than he had.
"So… when d'ya think you'll be ready t' get outta here… seriously. Ya can't lay in sickbay for the rest of your life…"
"I am aware of that, Commander," she said, making certain to look confident even though her voice betrayed her uncertainty. "And I do believe I will be able to… face my parents… tomorrow. I don't know when I can face Koss' parents. I already insulted them by canceling my wedding plans. This would only increase their… agitation."
"Well I'm sure you'll find a way t' tell 'em sooner or later," he told her reassuringly.
Unfortunately, his attempt didn't appear to work. "Perhaps," she replied coolly.
"Ya know, I can go with ya when ya tell your parents. If it'll help I mean. or even if ya don't think it'll help, there's always just bein' there for moral support. Ya know, but if ya--"
"Thank you, Commander," she said sincerely. "I would appreciate your… moral support. However, if you were to become angry, it would only escalate a delicate situation."
He held his hands up defensively. "I know. I'll try not t' let 'em rattle my cage too bad. I don't wanna make this any worse. This is all my fault in the first place-- like you've told me 'bout half a dozen times. I guess I just--"
"Commander!" she interrupted again. "You're rambling out of nervousness. Please stop."
'Ramblin'?' he thought. 'Damn, guess I was ramblin.' "Didn't mean t' make ya uncomfortable or anything, but well… here I go again…"
"Perhaps we should change the topic of conversation," she suggested.
"Yeah. Sounds like a good idea. What d'ya wanna talk about?"
Neither of them really had any thoughts, and Trip was about ready to suggest that he leave and return later. T'Pol realized this, and she didn't want him to leave her alone. She quickly came up with a topic. "Perhaps you could tell me about the crew's activities over the past week." He looked confused at her topic choice, so she decided to clarify." I've been incapacitated for the last five days, and therefore have no knowledge of the events which have taken place beyond the… unfortunate events in my own life."
Trip, not wanting to return to their previous topic of discussion, decided that he could settle for that reasoning. "Well…" he began. "I guess I could start with the Cap'n and work my way down." She nodded and he considered where to begin. Well, the Cap'n's been tryin' t get ya outta this, so he hasn't really been doin ' much else." Once again feeling an uncomfortable shift in his topic, he continued. "And, well, I guess I don't need t' tell ya about you or me…so, well--"
"Commander," she stopped him, sounding much stronger than she looked.
"Yeah?"
"I would like to hear what you have done." This surprised him visually and T'Pol could see that he didn't wan to tell her what he'd done, but she refused to let him avoid it. She wanted to know why he'd been in sickbay so often, why he'd gazed at her for many uncomfortable minutes, and why he was suddenly so protective of her, yet defensive at the same time. She knew that if he didn't answer her questions this subtle way, she would be willing to ask him more directly, even though she hoped inwardly that she didn't have to. It would most likely elevate the ever-present tension levels between them to possibly unimaginable levels. She certainly wasn't prepared for that, and knew that he wasn't either.
"Whad'ya mean, T'Pol?" he asked, obviously rattled. "Ya know exactly what I've been done practically every minute over the past week! I've been with you!" he was more surprised than anything, but was also slightly agitated. About what she didn't know.
She replied, her usual Vulcan calm holding even after his many emotional remarks. "That is incorrect, Commander. You have left on several occasions. First, you left me in my quarters several times. Then we left each other in the corridor." he winced slightly at this remark, though he tried to hide it. "And you told me yourself that you have reported for duty at the regular time each day, only coming here after your shifts are complete."
Obviously ready to protest, he pointed his finger angrily at her. But his face immediately changed into a relinquishing sigh and he dropped his hand back down. But instead of going back to hi lap where it had been. He used collected her right hand in his left, not daring use his right hand now. The Doctor had placed a brace over it a few hours after the mess hall talk.
Trip placed his elbow on the edge of the bed, his hand still holding hers.
"Alright," he said with a sigh at last. "Whad'ya wanna know?"
"I've told you. I would like to know what you have done when I was… not present," she told him, not to even trying to free her hand as he expected her to.
"Well, I don' know where t' start, but I guess…" he paused, not knowing exactly where she was coming from or why she was inquiring about his personal life. He stared off into a space, in a thoughtful daze again.
"Commander!" she said for the second time.
"Oh sorry. I was just thinking'. Ya know, so I know what t' say an' all…" 'An' so I can make sure I don't tell 'er everything like I would if I just started ramblin'. "Anyway, where was I… oh yeah. Well, I'll just start when ya ditched me in the corridor." At this, she decided that a more appropriate listening position would be helpful ao that she could watch him for subtle changes which could help explain his strange actions. Not to mention the reason for his holding of her hand. It didn't make sense to her, but somehow she appreciated it. She wasn't sure why.
She tried to sit up. But realized that it was far too painful and laid back down. He noticed her trouble and decided to help her. "Here, maybe I can lift up the back of this thing so ya can sit up without it hurtin' so bad." At this idea, she gratefully nodded and he released her hand gently so that he could raise the back of the biobed enough for physical comfort. Once he had risen it about 45o upward, she indicated that he could stop and he went back to his seat.
Once again, he grabbed her hand, although this time he was gazing at her again and she didn't know why. She only knew that, for some reason, she was staring back at him. She tried several times, unsuccessfully, to break their, but nothing worked.
They just sat there, Trip not continuing his story, until they realized that nearly fifteen minutes had passed. Trip, suddenly unsure of himself, finally broke shared near-unblinking gaze. She expected him to also release her hand and walk out of the room based on his obvious level of embarrassment, but he didn't, to T'Pol's surprise. She certainly didn't mind his presence, even if she acted as though she did. Her acting fooled everyone, to her relief. Everyone, that is, except Trip. He knew that they were friends, and that they always helped each when the other was in trouble. And T'Pol was definitely in trouble now. 'He attempted to help me as a friend, yet I fought with him. I allowed my emotional control to falter and argued angrily with him,' she thought.
"So," Trip said at last. "Where was I?"
"In your story or your romantic advances?" Even as the words left her mouth, she could not believe that she'd just asked him that question. She'd let a possibly offensive attempt at humor slip out. Perhaps she was spending too much time with him. After all, he wasn't actually making advances, was he?
Trip couldn't believe it either, as his face turned a distinct shade of red and he dropped her hand, backing away a few inches reflexively. "Well which would ya rather I continued?" he asked her playfully. Was he implying that he *had* been making romantic gestures? She couldn't be sure. He could, after all, be joking.
Realizing not only her own stupidity, but his embarrassment as well, she quickly responded. "I apologize, Commander. I was not implying that you were actually--"
His face reddened further, he stood up, and he walked away so that she couldn't see him. "Actually, you're right. I didn't notice 'til ya said somethin', but I was. So I'm the one who should be apologizin.' You had every right to accuse me of that. I guess I kinda deserve your criticism an' all. I mean, what kinda friend an' gentleman grabs a lady's hand an' starts starin' all googly-eyes at 'er like that. No one that I ever--"
"Commander!" she scolded for what seemed like the hundredth time that day. "You claimed that you would stop rambling. However you are now doing it once again." Although her voice had an air of strict criticism, inwardly she was simply surprised at his complete and utter embarrassment about such a topic, not to mention his out-and-out confession. She was surprised that he would admit to such accidental accusations. She knew that he didn't actually have any romantic interest in her, nor did she in him. But humans, she'd found, tended to act on instinct and their subconscious-- even if consciously they would never act in the same manner. She'd concluded that he had been acting in that way several minutes earlier. Usually humans denied any action which they carried out when this occurred. However, Commander Tucker, one of the most defensive and irrational that she'd met, was now admitting to such things. The confusion was enough to make her head spin, and it nearly was.
The Commander simply stood there and hung his head for what seemed like hours, but was only a few minutes. He wanted to look at everything but her and his face was still red from embarrassment and his hands where shaking from his nervousness.
T'Pol sat there staring at him unblinking and said in a much softer tone than before, "Commander?" This startled Trip enough to knock him out of his daze.
"Yeah," he said, appearing to find part of the floor very intriguing.
"Would you like to talk about something else?"
He looked overjoyed at this prospect, jogging back to his seat and plopping down.. "Sounds great. Whad'ya wanna talk about?"
"Perhaps something that does not involve either of us, so as not to return to another… uncomfortable conservation."
"That's the best idea I've heard all day," he said in relief. "How 'bout… uh… you know of any good singer?"
"No."
"How 'bout actors?"
"No."
"Artists?"
"No." Trip sighed. This was going to be a long night.
A/N2: I don't have anything to say… just R&R as always… thank you for reviewing so far BTW….. Oh, and just because I feel like making an official count, this story has a total of 103 reviews!!!! YAY!!!!! I know, that DOES NOT mean that this is the best story ever, but I DO appreciate how many people are reading this and enjoying it, even if it IS just the same people reviewing over and over again…. Thank you all!!!!!!