Disclaimer: Yes, I own Inu Yasha. I also own Trigun, Kenshin, Yu Yu Hakusho, Star Wars, and Scully, no not Mulder, just Scully :) What can I say I'm a very productive person ne?
Rating: Still PG -13 I think
Author's Note: Wow thanks for the wonderful reviews you guys!!! ::waves to the ecchi group:: You really made my day. I'm sorry that this chapter is so late, but sadly I have fallen victim to school :( I had a Japanese written midterm on Tuesday (the oral's tomorrow yikes!) And this morning I had a paper due on Keats. BTW if anyone can pick out the influence of negative capability in this fanfic I'll give them a chocolate covered Miroku lol :-D I hope this chapter doesn't seem too rushed since I wrote most of it today. As always I love to know what you think and I hope you enjoy!!! ~Queen of Nowhere
The Edge Chapter 1: Hold Me Now
Night had overtaken feudal Japan, and though all was still in the field where
Kagome and Miroku lingered, the nearby forest was teeming with all manner of vile
creatures. News traveled quickly through the demon community. Soon, all would learn
of Naraku's death and the shikon no tama's completion. When that happened, all the
demons that had been hiding in fear of Naraku were sure to come looking for the jewel.
Some demons could already sense the absence of Naraku's evil presence. It was only a
matter of time before they made their move.
Kagome was startled when she felt something touch her shoulder. She looked up
quickly, eyes wide with fear, but it was only Miroku. His pale face seemed to glow in the
moonlight. He had lost a lot of blood from the gash in his chest where Kohaku had
struck him.
"Kagome, we must gather the shards quickly. I can sense many demons nearby,
and I fear that they will be coming here soon. We need to leave as fast as possible," he
said as gently as he could under the circumstances. Kagome knew they were in no
condition to fight off demons right now, even weak ones, but she found herself reluctant
to go. Leaving this place would be the first step in a long road of moving on. She didn't
think she was ready to do that yet. She didn't know if she would ever be ready.
Miroku saw her hesitation, understood it, but could not allow it to hinder them.
He couldn't lose another friend today. He wouldn't. "Please, Kagome," he said taking
her chin in his hand and forcing her to meet his eyes. She saw the look of pain there, so
vast and intense and knew that it must be mirrored in her own eyes. She couldn't refuse a
look like that; there had been too much heartache today already. Instead, she nodded
without a word and untangled herself from Inu Yasha. She laid him gently on the
ground, pausing over him momentarily before she turned away. She could not begin to
describe her feelings as she looked at him lying there. Grief? Pain? All were just words
for something so much more, something that transcended them all. A sorrow so pure and
overwhelming that if she dwelt on it too long she knew it would consume her.
Kagome tried to push her thoughts away and keep her mind blank as she gathered
the shards. Miroku walked beside her, a source of silent comfort. She stopped when she
came to Kohaku's body lying next to that of his sister. She kneeled down and tenderly
removed the shard from his back. The poor boy had been through so much in his short
life. He'd been killed and revived only to be manipulated by the most wicked and
depraved demon ever to draw breath. This once sweet boy had become little more than
an instrument for evil.
A vivid memory flashed through Kagome's mind as she held the shard in her
hand. Kohaku had caught Miroku off guard and the blade had slashed his chest fairly
deep and knocked him unconscious. Kohaku was going for the killing blow when Sango
had shoved Miroku out of the way and took the hit herself. The mighty exterminator's
eyes squeezed closed at the sudden pain in her chest. The sickle had struck her directly in
the heart. She fell to her knees stunned and then collapsed on the ground.
Even with his powers amplified by the many shikon shards in his possession,
Naraku could not fully control a heart as strong as Kohaku's. No matter how hard he
tried, Naraku would never be able to completely erase the part of his mind that held his
memories. Upon seeing what he had done to his sister Naraku's hold was finally broken,
and Kohaku fell down beside her crying. Sango pulled her brother to her and embraced
him. She told him that she had forgiven him for everything, that it was not his fault.
Sango stroked his hair and told him that everything was going to be all right. With the
last of her strength she pulled out her hidden knife, and with tears flowing freely stabbed
her younger brother in the back. He would never hurt Miroku or the others again.
Kohaku's face didn't register anger or even shock. Instead, he looked oddly at peace.
Kagome had watched the proceedings with a kind of stunned horror. Miroku had
been unconscious for most of it, but he had awoken in time to see Sango slipping away.
He had called her name and made to go to her, but it was already too late. The siblings
died side by side by their own hands.
Time seemed to stand still as Kagome relived this scene. It could not really be
called a memory because it was too new, too real. She took a moment to move beside
Kohaku's body and over to Sango. Tears ran down her cheeks and rained on the ashen
face of her fallen companion. Kagome felt like she had lost her own sister. She kissed Sango's cool forehead before getting up to resume her quest. She turned to see Miroku watching her, but his expression was unreadable at best, indefinable at worst.
Kagome now held all of the shikon jewel except that which was in Naraku's own
possession. Kouga had been injured pretty badly by Kagura during the fray. His
underlings had taken him away from the battle to treat his injuries, but before he left he
had insisted upon giving his shards to Kagome. His injuries were severe but Kagome had
no doubt the resilient wolf would make a full recovery in time. All she had left to do was gather the final pieces of the jewel from Naraku and complete it once and for all.
She approached Naraku's foul body with Miroku trailing close behind. She
stopped a few paces before the actual corpse, where the grass had withered and only a
dead brown remained. She felt Miroku's hand on her shoulder once again, giving her
courage and assurance. She shut her eyes for a moment and could feel her mind getting ready to play Inu Yasha's death scene in her internal theater once again. She forced them open before the image could fully take form, and stepped forward quickly. Most of the shikon no tama was clutched in his dead hand. Greedy even in death, Kagome had to pry his fingers off the sacred jewel.
Miroku watched in awe as Kagome's mere touch turned the tumultuous red into a
demure pink. Fear, anger, avarice, all such negative emotions would taint the jewel, and
yet, it remained untouched by sadness. Even a sadness as profound as Kagome's now did
nothing to taint the fragment or prevent her from purifying it. Kagome placed all the
shards together in her hand and for a moment it was if the sun had sudenly decided to shine at night. The surrounding area was illuminated by a light so pure and searing that they had to shield their eyes or else be blinded. And then it was done. The jewel, now complete, rested neatly in Kagome's palm. She closed her fist around it and turned to look at Miroku. He acknowledged her with a small smile. After all this time and grief, their
quest was finally done.
"Well if they didn't know before I'm sure they do now," she said. Her words
were light but they carried such a weight. "We better get back to Kaedae's." And now,
they came upon a problem; they would have to transport the bodies of Inu Yasha and
Sango by themselves. Miroku was hardly in any condition to get back himself, let alone
carrying someone else. His wound remained untreated, and though the bleeding had
stopped for now, she feared that strenuous labor would cause it to start again. "I'll carry Inu Yasha," she said. Before Miroku could voice a protest she continued. "I'm not a weak little girl anymore, and you're injured and..." her voice trailed off and she lowered her head. When she raised it there were tears in her eyes. "And I want to."
"Ok," came Miroku's simple reply. There was no need to say more.
Kagome gave him a grateful look for not forcing her to explain further. She lovingly trailed her hand along the contours of Inu Yasha's face one last time before hoisting him up on her shoulders as best she could. So many times he had carried her on his back effortlessly, and now it was her turn to try and do for him what he had so often done for her. Perhaps Kagome was not the physically strongest girl, but there was no way in hell she was going to leave Inu Yasha's body behind to be desecrated by demons. She finally got him settled into a position she thought she could manage. She looked to see how Miroku was progressing. She was shocked to see not only the body of Sango clasped tenderly in his arms, but Kohaku's body slung over his shoulder as well. "Miroku?" she questioned.
"I cannot bring myself to leave him behind. I know this is what Sango would have wanted," he said. He looked haggard but determined.
"Are you sure you'll be able to manage it?" Kagome asked, concern lacing her voice. "You're injured and we haven't even had a chance to treat it."
"There's no need to worry about me; I will be fine, but we should hurry." That was her stoic Miroku, brave to the last. She almost found it in her to smile.
They made the long trek back to Kaedae's in silence. Both were lost in their respective thoughts and grief. As the miles wore on, their minds became as exhausted as their bodies, but neither uttered a word of complaint. Somewhere along the way blood had begun to trickle from Miroku's wound again. If he noticed, he gave no outward sign. As dawn began to release it's first fragile light, Kagome and Miroku reached the outskirts of the village. With their destination in sight they picked up the pace and slightly. Sensing their auras approaching, Kaedae exited the hut and waited apprehensively. In the distance, she saw two figures approaching. She didn't have to ask them what happened. The truth was written in the sadness of their eyes and the bodies in their arms.
Catching a whiff of Kagome's scent, Shippou awoke and bounded out to greet her. Kirara wasn't far behind. When it became apparent that they were losing the battle, Sango had instructed Kirara to take Shippou out of harms way and remain at Kaedae's until it was over. They exited the hut and took in the gloomy faces around them. Shippou stopped midstep looking uncertainly from each member of the group and the bodies they were carrying. "Kagome?" he questioned on the verge of tears. Suddenly he was a blur flying through the air and landing on Kagome's chest. He clung to her with fierce desperation. "Inu Yasha!!!! Sango!!!" he wailed. His tears stained Kagome's uniform. "Are...are they de..dead?" His eyes big teary eyes lifted to Kagome's seeking reassurance that all was not as bad as it seemed, but she had none to offer him. Kirara let out an anguished howl that was both beautiful and terrible in its raw emotion.
It was not long before they had the bodies laid out inside the hut. Kagome took a few minutes to rock Shippou back to sleep. He was exhausted from crying and fell quickly into a sound sleep. Kirara did not leave Sango's side. She kept a mournful vigil, guarding her even in death. Kaedae began to prepare the bodies for burial. Kagome didn't think that she could remain in the crowded hut much longer. She stepped outside, letting the cool morning air envelope her like a shroud. It seemed like death was everywhere, even on the winds of spring. In her hands, however, she held the power of life. She stared down into the shikon no tama. Such a small thing, yet so powerful. Could this really bring Inu Yasha and Sango back to life? Could she, a 17 year old girl from Tokyo, really possess the ability to reverse the most powerful act of nature? Did she dare?
Miroku found her like this a few moments later. Staring intently into the jewel, searching for an answer. His wounds had been cleaned and bandaged, most likely by Kaedae. He moved slowly as if he was still in some pain. "Kagome?" he questioned softly while kneeling down beside her.
"Do you think it would work?" she asked him without looking up. He didn't have to ask her what she meant by this. The very same thought had crossed his mind.
"Yes."
"Do you think I should then?" she asked with uncertainty. He had as much to gain or lose from this as she did, and she valued his opinion greatly.
"Kagome, I can't answer that. The decision is entirely up to you, but...."
"Yeah, it's that 'but' that's stopping me. I was thinking of Kikyou of all people. She was at peace before she was resurrected. I wouldn't want to take that away from Inu Yasha and Sango. They deserve that much."
"That they do," Miroku agreed.
"And then I thought about Naraku. How he had used the shikon shard to revive Kohaku for his own sinister purposes. But Miroku, if I use the jewel to revive Inu Yasha and Sango for my own selfish reasons, that would make me almost as bad as him. I don't think I could live with myself if that ever happened," she looked at him tearfully, willing him to understand.
"Kagome, I know that. And I know things seem like they couldn't get any worse right now, but I have to believe that everything happens for a reason. Their death must serve a purpose, as must our life." Miroku waited to see how she would take these words. While he was holding Sango in his arms on that long walk home, he had been tempted to ask Kagome to use the shikon himself, but ultimately he had thought better of it. Messing with the very flow of nature itself was not something to be taken lightly and even the best intentions could pave the road to hell when great power was involved.
Kagome's mind was made up. In a way, it had been all along. She knew in her heart that it would not be right to bring them back to life, but love can lead one down dangerous paths. "Miroku, you're right. It's just that, I don't know how to live without them either."
"That I understand perfectly," Miroku said quietly looking down. Kagome heard her own pain echoed in his voice and could hold back her tears no more. Once they broke loose they brought with them all the images she had been repressing and all the emotion she had be denying. She let the jewel fall from her hands, finally letting go of the last thing that could bring Inu Yasha back to life. Finally accepting that she would have to let go of him. Miroku encircled her with his strong arms and let himself cry with her.
"Just hold me now," she whispered.
"I will," he answered. "I will."
Rating: Still PG -13 I think
Author's Note: Wow thanks for the wonderful reviews you guys!!! ::waves to the ecchi group:: You really made my day. I'm sorry that this chapter is so late, but sadly I have fallen victim to school :( I had a Japanese written midterm on Tuesday (the oral's tomorrow yikes!) And this morning I had a paper due on Keats. BTW if anyone can pick out the influence of negative capability in this fanfic I'll give them a chocolate covered Miroku lol :-D I hope this chapter doesn't seem too rushed since I wrote most of it today. As always I love to know what you think and I hope you enjoy!!! ~Queen of Nowhere
The Edge Chapter 1: Hold Me Now
Night had overtaken feudal Japan, and though all was still in the field where
Kagome and Miroku lingered, the nearby forest was teeming with all manner of vile
creatures. News traveled quickly through the demon community. Soon, all would learn
of Naraku's death and the shikon no tama's completion. When that happened, all the
demons that had been hiding in fear of Naraku were sure to come looking for the jewel.
Some demons could already sense the absence of Naraku's evil presence. It was only a
matter of time before they made their move.
Kagome was startled when she felt something touch her shoulder. She looked up
quickly, eyes wide with fear, but it was only Miroku. His pale face seemed to glow in the
moonlight. He had lost a lot of blood from the gash in his chest where Kohaku had
struck him.
"Kagome, we must gather the shards quickly. I can sense many demons nearby,
and I fear that they will be coming here soon. We need to leave as fast as possible," he
said as gently as he could under the circumstances. Kagome knew they were in no
condition to fight off demons right now, even weak ones, but she found herself reluctant
to go. Leaving this place would be the first step in a long road of moving on. She didn't
think she was ready to do that yet. She didn't know if she would ever be ready.
Miroku saw her hesitation, understood it, but could not allow it to hinder them.
He couldn't lose another friend today. He wouldn't. "Please, Kagome," he said taking
her chin in his hand and forcing her to meet his eyes. She saw the look of pain there, so
vast and intense and knew that it must be mirrored in her own eyes. She couldn't refuse a
look like that; there had been too much heartache today already. Instead, she nodded
without a word and untangled herself from Inu Yasha. She laid him gently on the
ground, pausing over him momentarily before she turned away. She could not begin to
describe her feelings as she looked at him lying there. Grief? Pain? All were just words
for something so much more, something that transcended them all. A sorrow so pure and
overwhelming that if she dwelt on it too long she knew it would consume her.
Kagome tried to push her thoughts away and keep her mind blank as she gathered
the shards. Miroku walked beside her, a source of silent comfort. She stopped when she
came to Kohaku's body lying next to that of his sister. She kneeled down and tenderly
removed the shard from his back. The poor boy had been through so much in his short
life. He'd been killed and revived only to be manipulated by the most wicked and
depraved demon ever to draw breath. This once sweet boy had become little more than
an instrument for evil.
A vivid memory flashed through Kagome's mind as she held the shard in her
hand. Kohaku had caught Miroku off guard and the blade had slashed his chest fairly
deep and knocked him unconscious. Kohaku was going for the killing blow when Sango
had shoved Miroku out of the way and took the hit herself. The mighty exterminator's
eyes squeezed closed at the sudden pain in her chest. The sickle had struck her directly in
the heart. She fell to her knees stunned and then collapsed on the ground.
Even with his powers amplified by the many shikon shards in his possession,
Naraku could not fully control a heart as strong as Kohaku's. No matter how hard he
tried, Naraku would never be able to completely erase the part of his mind that held his
memories. Upon seeing what he had done to his sister Naraku's hold was finally broken,
and Kohaku fell down beside her crying. Sango pulled her brother to her and embraced
him. She told him that she had forgiven him for everything, that it was not his fault.
Sango stroked his hair and told him that everything was going to be all right. With the
last of her strength she pulled out her hidden knife, and with tears flowing freely stabbed
her younger brother in the back. He would never hurt Miroku or the others again.
Kohaku's face didn't register anger or even shock. Instead, he looked oddly at peace.
Kagome had watched the proceedings with a kind of stunned horror. Miroku had
been unconscious for most of it, but he had awoken in time to see Sango slipping away.
He had called her name and made to go to her, but it was already too late. The siblings
died side by side by their own hands.
Time seemed to stand still as Kagome relived this scene. It could not really be
called a memory because it was too new, too real. She took a moment to move beside
Kohaku's body and over to Sango. Tears ran down her cheeks and rained on the ashen
face of her fallen companion. Kagome felt like she had lost her own sister. She kissed Sango's cool forehead before getting up to resume her quest. She turned to see Miroku watching her, but his expression was unreadable at best, indefinable at worst.
Kagome now held all of the shikon jewel except that which was in Naraku's own
possession. Kouga had been injured pretty badly by Kagura during the fray. His
underlings had taken him away from the battle to treat his injuries, but before he left he
had insisted upon giving his shards to Kagome. His injuries were severe but Kagome had
no doubt the resilient wolf would make a full recovery in time. All she had left to do was gather the final pieces of the jewel from Naraku and complete it once and for all.
She approached Naraku's foul body with Miroku trailing close behind. She
stopped a few paces before the actual corpse, where the grass had withered and only a
dead brown remained. She felt Miroku's hand on her shoulder once again, giving her
courage and assurance. She shut her eyes for a moment and could feel her mind getting ready to play Inu Yasha's death scene in her internal theater once again. She forced them open before the image could fully take form, and stepped forward quickly. Most of the shikon no tama was clutched in his dead hand. Greedy even in death, Kagome had to pry his fingers off the sacred jewel.
Miroku watched in awe as Kagome's mere touch turned the tumultuous red into a
demure pink. Fear, anger, avarice, all such negative emotions would taint the jewel, and
yet, it remained untouched by sadness. Even a sadness as profound as Kagome's now did
nothing to taint the fragment or prevent her from purifying it. Kagome placed all the
shards together in her hand and for a moment it was if the sun had sudenly decided to shine at night. The surrounding area was illuminated by a light so pure and searing that they had to shield their eyes or else be blinded. And then it was done. The jewel, now complete, rested neatly in Kagome's palm. She closed her fist around it and turned to look at Miroku. He acknowledged her with a small smile. After all this time and grief, their
quest was finally done.
"Well if they didn't know before I'm sure they do now," she said. Her words
were light but they carried such a weight. "We better get back to Kaedae's." And now,
they came upon a problem; they would have to transport the bodies of Inu Yasha and
Sango by themselves. Miroku was hardly in any condition to get back himself, let alone
carrying someone else. His wound remained untreated, and though the bleeding had
stopped for now, she feared that strenuous labor would cause it to start again. "I'll carry Inu Yasha," she said. Before Miroku could voice a protest she continued. "I'm not a weak little girl anymore, and you're injured and..." her voice trailed off and she lowered her head. When she raised it there were tears in her eyes. "And I want to."
"Ok," came Miroku's simple reply. There was no need to say more.
Kagome gave him a grateful look for not forcing her to explain further. She lovingly trailed her hand along the contours of Inu Yasha's face one last time before hoisting him up on her shoulders as best she could. So many times he had carried her on his back effortlessly, and now it was her turn to try and do for him what he had so often done for her. Perhaps Kagome was not the physically strongest girl, but there was no way in hell she was going to leave Inu Yasha's body behind to be desecrated by demons. She finally got him settled into a position she thought she could manage. She looked to see how Miroku was progressing. She was shocked to see not only the body of Sango clasped tenderly in his arms, but Kohaku's body slung over his shoulder as well. "Miroku?" she questioned.
"I cannot bring myself to leave him behind. I know this is what Sango would have wanted," he said. He looked haggard but determined.
"Are you sure you'll be able to manage it?" Kagome asked, concern lacing her voice. "You're injured and we haven't even had a chance to treat it."
"There's no need to worry about me; I will be fine, but we should hurry." That was her stoic Miroku, brave to the last. She almost found it in her to smile.
They made the long trek back to Kaedae's in silence. Both were lost in their respective thoughts and grief. As the miles wore on, their minds became as exhausted as their bodies, but neither uttered a word of complaint. Somewhere along the way blood had begun to trickle from Miroku's wound again. If he noticed, he gave no outward sign. As dawn began to release it's first fragile light, Kagome and Miroku reached the outskirts of the village. With their destination in sight they picked up the pace and slightly. Sensing their auras approaching, Kaedae exited the hut and waited apprehensively. In the distance, she saw two figures approaching. She didn't have to ask them what happened. The truth was written in the sadness of their eyes and the bodies in their arms.
Catching a whiff of Kagome's scent, Shippou awoke and bounded out to greet her. Kirara wasn't far behind. When it became apparent that they were losing the battle, Sango had instructed Kirara to take Shippou out of harms way and remain at Kaedae's until it was over. They exited the hut and took in the gloomy faces around them. Shippou stopped midstep looking uncertainly from each member of the group and the bodies they were carrying. "Kagome?" he questioned on the verge of tears. Suddenly he was a blur flying through the air and landing on Kagome's chest. He clung to her with fierce desperation. "Inu Yasha!!!! Sango!!!" he wailed. His tears stained Kagome's uniform. "Are...are they de..dead?" His eyes big teary eyes lifted to Kagome's seeking reassurance that all was not as bad as it seemed, but she had none to offer him. Kirara let out an anguished howl that was both beautiful and terrible in its raw emotion.
It was not long before they had the bodies laid out inside the hut. Kagome took a few minutes to rock Shippou back to sleep. He was exhausted from crying and fell quickly into a sound sleep. Kirara did not leave Sango's side. She kept a mournful vigil, guarding her even in death. Kaedae began to prepare the bodies for burial. Kagome didn't think that she could remain in the crowded hut much longer. She stepped outside, letting the cool morning air envelope her like a shroud. It seemed like death was everywhere, even on the winds of spring. In her hands, however, she held the power of life. She stared down into the shikon no tama. Such a small thing, yet so powerful. Could this really bring Inu Yasha and Sango back to life? Could she, a 17 year old girl from Tokyo, really possess the ability to reverse the most powerful act of nature? Did she dare?
Miroku found her like this a few moments later. Staring intently into the jewel, searching for an answer. His wounds had been cleaned and bandaged, most likely by Kaedae. He moved slowly as if he was still in some pain. "Kagome?" he questioned softly while kneeling down beside her.
"Do you think it would work?" she asked him without looking up. He didn't have to ask her what she meant by this. The very same thought had crossed his mind.
"Yes."
"Do you think I should then?" she asked with uncertainty. He had as much to gain or lose from this as she did, and she valued his opinion greatly.
"Kagome, I can't answer that. The decision is entirely up to you, but...."
"Yeah, it's that 'but' that's stopping me. I was thinking of Kikyou of all people. She was at peace before she was resurrected. I wouldn't want to take that away from Inu Yasha and Sango. They deserve that much."
"That they do," Miroku agreed.
"And then I thought about Naraku. How he had used the shikon shard to revive Kohaku for his own sinister purposes. But Miroku, if I use the jewel to revive Inu Yasha and Sango for my own selfish reasons, that would make me almost as bad as him. I don't think I could live with myself if that ever happened," she looked at him tearfully, willing him to understand.
"Kagome, I know that. And I know things seem like they couldn't get any worse right now, but I have to believe that everything happens for a reason. Their death must serve a purpose, as must our life." Miroku waited to see how she would take these words. While he was holding Sango in his arms on that long walk home, he had been tempted to ask Kagome to use the shikon himself, but ultimately he had thought better of it. Messing with the very flow of nature itself was not something to be taken lightly and even the best intentions could pave the road to hell when great power was involved.
Kagome's mind was made up. In a way, it had been all along. She knew in her heart that it would not be right to bring them back to life, but love can lead one down dangerous paths. "Miroku, you're right. It's just that, I don't know how to live without them either."
"That I understand perfectly," Miroku said quietly looking down. Kagome heard her own pain echoed in his voice and could hold back her tears no more. Once they broke loose they brought with them all the images she had been repressing and all the emotion she had be denying. She let the jewel fall from her hands, finally letting go of the last thing that could bring Inu Yasha back to life. Finally accepting that she would have to let go of him. Miroku encircled her with his strong arms and let himself cry with her.
"Just hold me now," she whispered.
"I will," he answered. "I will."