A/N: Sorry about the delay in updating this story. I'm sure u guys would
understand coz I KNOW u are in the same situation as I am. Why do they have
to prepare us for the SATs a year before it actually happens? And not to
mention that the SAT test is sorta stupid. Anyway, I'm tied up with school
work right now, so it may be a while before I update again!
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone.
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3. Forgive me
Abby's POV
The platform was bare, deserted at midnight. There were no people to speak of. After all, it's not like many people will go out or return home this late. I leaned against a pole and waited for the El to come.
"Abby." A low and husky voice called out to me. For a moment I thought it was Carter. But it couldn't be; he's already gone. Besides, it wasn't even a man's voice, it was just my subconscious mind playing tricks on me.
"I thought you're in for the graveyard shift." I told Susan, who was coming up the stairs.
"Switched shifts with Luka. I'll be on at seven. I really need some sleep." She yawned, not bothering to cover her mouth.
"Oh."
"Did you guys talk?" Susan asked, skillfully keeping an eye on me, watching how I would respond. Suddenly, I feel like one of the patients, ready to get examined.
"Who?" That's right, play dumb.
"Abby." Susan climbed the final step and looked at me squarely in the eye.
I sighed and looked away. I'm not going to get away with this. After all, it's Susan. She's not going to leave this topic alone, not without my answer. "No."
Susan looked uncomfortable, as if she was deciding on whether to pursue on the topic or not. I might as well save her from the trouble.
"Look Susan, I don't want to talk about it." I groaned when I heard my stomach growling.
She looked at me quizzically and cocked an eyebrow. I ignored her and wished for the El to come. Stupid railway.
"Look, Abby."
I cut her off. "Susan, I really don't want to talk right now."
She furrowed her brows, as if something was troubling her. I knew she had something to tell me, but I have a feeling that it's not something I'd want to know.
"Abby, listen." I turned my head to look at her and found her green eyes looking at me, so intense that it literally burned a hole through me.
"There's something that I need to tell you, something that I've been keeping it as a secret for a couple of weeks now. I know you're not going to like this, but I've got to tell you. There's no other way." She shrugged her shoulders helplessly.
I turned my head away, craving for a cigarette. Better yet, why don't you give me a drink? I wasn't sure if I'd want to hear what Susan have to say.
"Does it have something to do with John?"
She hesitated, as if she didn't know who was John. Finally, she answered. "Yes."
I let out my breath shakily. "Tell me." I said quietly into the air.
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Carter's POV
I walked up the stairs leading to Kristy's apartment. What is it that she wanted to talk about? What was wrong with her? I knocked on the door and stepped back, waiting for her to answer the door.
"John?" a meek voice behind the door asked. "Is that you?"
"Yes, Kristy, let me in."
The door flung open and Kristy rushed into my arm. She pushed her lips against mine and kissed me passionately. I pushed her away.
"What is it?" I wanted to get over with it. I have to talk to Abby tonight. There's no time for me to linger here.
Kristy stumbled to keep her balance. "What is what Johnny? We're in no hurry." She slurred, gradually advancing on me, like a predator hunting for its prey. I've got no time for games. She's drunk, I noticed. Her blue eyes, normally bright, were bloodshot.
"Kristy." I warned, as she got closer and closer to me. "Don't."
"Are you scared of me?" She teased, swaying dangerously. "Have you forgotten about the passion we shared that night? Don't you want to give it another try?" She struck out her arm for me to take it. I pushed her away.
"I'm going." I announced, stepping back into the corridor. "Call me when you're ready to talk." I began to close the door behind me, when Kristy collapsed onto the floor, tears flowing down her cheeks, "I'm pregnant John, with your child." She whispered.
I froze, not able to believe what I just heard. Then, being the perfect gentlemen that I am, I slammed the door and ran, running away from the truth. When did my life get so complicated? I needed someone to talk to, I thought as I slid into the car. I looked over to the empty seat at my right. Abby.
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Abby's POV
I stared at the blank screen of the television, my feet hugged to my chest. How could he do this to me? I found myself asking. I thought he loved me. Then, I wasn't being the best wife in the whole universe either, but how could he cheat on me? I couldn't believe I had to find this out through Susan.
What if Susan hadn't been there when Carter did it? What if she hadn't overheard the disgusting sounds that I couldn't believe they made? Will Carter tell me? Will Carter ever confess to me? For the first time in my life, tears flowed down my cheeks, never ending. I lowered my head between my knees and sobbed. I remembered the chaos theory that Carter and I once shared. My life, no, our lives are truly in chaos now.
The door creaked. Someone had entered the room. I barely looked up. There's only one other person who held the key's to my apartment. Carter.
"God, Abby." He took notice of my tear stained face and rushed over to me to pull me into a hug. I peered at him through my tears. His face was drawn in, little lines suddenly appeared on his face, making him look older than he is. Something was bugging him, and I had a feeling that this was more than what I had thought. There's something more that he's hiding. Something else had happened since that night. My tears had stopped and an infinite silence seemed to have fallen over us. The air turned chilly despite the intense heat radiating from the heater.
Carter looked up at me, his eyes trying to search through me. Those eyes that had seemed to talk to me before now seemed to be a bottomless pit. It no longer held it's magic. The bond between us is broken. Maybe this is good. Maybe Carter and I were never meant for each other.
"I'm sorry Abby." He said softly, kissing me lightly on my neck. I winced at the feeling of his lips against my skin. It was too much to think that this same pair of lips had been on another woman's body sometime ago. I pushed him away. I could barely look at him, let alone let him touch me.
"No." I said, my brain preoccupied with the thoughts of Carter betraying me. Is there something wrong with me? Why does it seem that all my marriages fall apart? There's no way I'm going to get over this. No way that I'm going to forgive him.
He stood up too, as if sensing what I'm thinking. "You know." He said, looking down.
"Damn right I know." I said coldly. I had to do it this way, I had to be cold and hostile, or else, those tears will come again, and I will breakdown. Now, although my heart is dying inside, at least the tears won't come. Why? I asked him silently. Why did you do this to me?
"He walked over and tried to hold me, but I wouldn't let him. "It's not like a hug could erase what you did, Carter." It came out a little harsher that I meant it to be.
He was still holding my wrists, afraid that I'd be gone if he let go of my hands. He sank down onto his knees and buried her face into my waist, inhaling the scent of my clothes and sobbing uncontrollably. I forced myself to look forward, to not look at him.
"I'm so sorry for everything, forgive me Abby." He looked up hopefully, willing me to look at him. But I can't, it hurt too much. When did everything become so wrong? There's no turning back now.
"You did too much, John."
"What about the baby?"
"It'll be okay."
"Forgive me, Abby. For the baby's sake."
I had completely forgotten about the little life inside me. God, I'm a terrible mother. Am I going to kill my own child once more? Either way, it couldn't help the situation now.
"No, John. This isn't about the baby, this is about us. About the fact that our relationship is over for good." No! I screamed to myself. Don't let him go! But I remained silent. There's nothing more that needed to be said.
He stood up, gazing into me for one last time. As much as I'd hate to admit it, I could still feel the bond. still feel his gaze reaching into my soul. I broke the gaze and held open the door for him to leave. "I want you to leave." I told him.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked, his expression pained.
"Go." I said quietly, unable to make myself look at him.
He walked out of the apartment slowly, not taking his eyes off me. "Abby, look at me." His voice was of such force that my eyes couldn't help but travel to his body. I stood at the door, transfixed. "I love you, Abby." He whispered. The words echoed through the hallway, mocking me. I slammed the door shut, blocking out the rest of the world. Abandoning the only man that I had truly ever loved.
"I love you too, Carter." I murmured and sank to the floor. Maybe this will work out someday. Maybe there's still hope for us. I closed my eyes and let the tears flow, allowing the earth to swallow me up. There's still hope..
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Phew. That's it. The 3rd chapter. Hope you guys liked it. R AND R PLZPLZ!!!!
Thanks for those who reviewed.
Becky ------ Why????? Why why why won't you be adding any new chapters?? I thought u said there was more? Hehe. Sorry for that outbreak. that's just the same ol' typical MOI!! Thanks for reviewing.
CARBYfan --- Hehe. Thanks. even I myself don't know if it is the baby before. I think this is a totally new story though....... I think the baby don't have enough of a part in this fic. Hmm. maybe I gotta make the baby more important. What do u think? Thanks for reviewing.
Okay, it's the second time that this had happened. I've noticed that the second chapter of the fics usually have less reviews than the fist. WAY LESS. If This happens again, then it's the third time. Aha. What a charm.
Peace out, *~JeSS~*
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++
3. Forgive me
Abby's POV
The platform was bare, deserted at midnight. There were no people to speak of. After all, it's not like many people will go out or return home this late. I leaned against a pole and waited for the El to come.
"Abby." A low and husky voice called out to me. For a moment I thought it was Carter. But it couldn't be; he's already gone. Besides, it wasn't even a man's voice, it was just my subconscious mind playing tricks on me.
"I thought you're in for the graveyard shift." I told Susan, who was coming up the stairs.
"Switched shifts with Luka. I'll be on at seven. I really need some sleep." She yawned, not bothering to cover her mouth.
"Oh."
"Did you guys talk?" Susan asked, skillfully keeping an eye on me, watching how I would respond. Suddenly, I feel like one of the patients, ready to get examined.
"Who?" That's right, play dumb.
"Abby." Susan climbed the final step and looked at me squarely in the eye.
I sighed and looked away. I'm not going to get away with this. After all, it's Susan. She's not going to leave this topic alone, not without my answer. "No."
Susan looked uncomfortable, as if she was deciding on whether to pursue on the topic or not. I might as well save her from the trouble.
"Look Susan, I don't want to talk about it." I groaned when I heard my stomach growling.
She looked at me quizzically and cocked an eyebrow. I ignored her and wished for the El to come. Stupid railway.
"Look, Abby."
I cut her off. "Susan, I really don't want to talk right now."
She furrowed her brows, as if something was troubling her. I knew she had something to tell me, but I have a feeling that it's not something I'd want to know.
"Abby, listen." I turned my head to look at her and found her green eyes looking at me, so intense that it literally burned a hole through me.
"There's something that I need to tell you, something that I've been keeping it as a secret for a couple of weeks now. I know you're not going to like this, but I've got to tell you. There's no other way." She shrugged her shoulders helplessly.
I turned my head away, craving for a cigarette. Better yet, why don't you give me a drink? I wasn't sure if I'd want to hear what Susan have to say.
"Does it have something to do with John?"
She hesitated, as if she didn't know who was John. Finally, she answered. "Yes."
I let out my breath shakily. "Tell me." I said quietly into the air.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------------
Carter's POV
I walked up the stairs leading to Kristy's apartment. What is it that she wanted to talk about? What was wrong with her? I knocked on the door and stepped back, waiting for her to answer the door.
"John?" a meek voice behind the door asked. "Is that you?"
"Yes, Kristy, let me in."
The door flung open and Kristy rushed into my arm. She pushed her lips against mine and kissed me passionately. I pushed her away.
"What is it?" I wanted to get over with it. I have to talk to Abby tonight. There's no time for me to linger here.
Kristy stumbled to keep her balance. "What is what Johnny? We're in no hurry." She slurred, gradually advancing on me, like a predator hunting for its prey. I've got no time for games. She's drunk, I noticed. Her blue eyes, normally bright, were bloodshot.
"Kristy." I warned, as she got closer and closer to me. "Don't."
"Are you scared of me?" She teased, swaying dangerously. "Have you forgotten about the passion we shared that night? Don't you want to give it another try?" She struck out her arm for me to take it. I pushed her away.
"I'm going." I announced, stepping back into the corridor. "Call me when you're ready to talk." I began to close the door behind me, when Kristy collapsed onto the floor, tears flowing down her cheeks, "I'm pregnant John, with your child." She whispered.
I froze, not able to believe what I just heard. Then, being the perfect gentlemen that I am, I slammed the door and ran, running away from the truth. When did my life get so complicated? I needed someone to talk to, I thought as I slid into the car. I looked over to the empty seat at my right. Abby.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Abby's POV
I stared at the blank screen of the television, my feet hugged to my chest. How could he do this to me? I found myself asking. I thought he loved me. Then, I wasn't being the best wife in the whole universe either, but how could he cheat on me? I couldn't believe I had to find this out through Susan.
What if Susan hadn't been there when Carter did it? What if she hadn't overheard the disgusting sounds that I couldn't believe they made? Will Carter tell me? Will Carter ever confess to me? For the first time in my life, tears flowed down my cheeks, never ending. I lowered my head between my knees and sobbed. I remembered the chaos theory that Carter and I once shared. My life, no, our lives are truly in chaos now.
The door creaked. Someone had entered the room. I barely looked up. There's only one other person who held the key's to my apartment. Carter.
"God, Abby." He took notice of my tear stained face and rushed over to me to pull me into a hug. I peered at him through my tears. His face was drawn in, little lines suddenly appeared on his face, making him look older than he is. Something was bugging him, and I had a feeling that this was more than what I had thought. There's something more that he's hiding. Something else had happened since that night. My tears had stopped and an infinite silence seemed to have fallen over us. The air turned chilly despite the intense heat radiating from the heater.
Carter looked up at me, his eyes trying to search through me. Those eyes that had seemed to talk to me before now seemed to be a bottomless pit. It no longer held it's magic. The bond between us is broken. Maybe this is good. Maybe Carter and I were never meant for each other.
"I'm sorry Abby." He said softly, kissing me lightly on my neck. I winced at the feeling of his lips against my skin. It was too much to think that this same pair of lips had been on another woman's body sometime ago. I pushed him away. I could barely look at him, let alone let him touch me.
"No." I said, my brain preoccupied with the thoughts of Carter betraying me. Is there something wrong with me? Why does it seem that all my marriages fall apart? There's no way I'm going to get over this. No way that I'm going to forgive him.
He stood up too, as if sensing what I'm thinking. "You know." He said, looking down.
"Damn right I know." I said coldly. I had to do it this way, I had to be cold and hostile, or else, those tears will come again, and I will breakdown. Now, although my heart is dying inside, at least the tears won't come. Why? I asked him silently. Why did you do this to me?
"He walked over and tried to hold me, but I wouldn't let him. "It's not like a hug could erase what you did, Carter." It came out a little harsher that I meant it to be.
He was still holding my wrists, afraid that I'd be gone if he let go of my hands. He sank down onto his knees and buried her face into my waist, inhaling the scent of my clothes and sobbing uncontrollably. I forced myself to look forward, to not look at him.
"I'm so sorry for everything, forgive me Abby." He looked up hopefully, willing me to look at him. But I can't, it hurt too much. When did everything become so wrong? There's no turning back now.
"You did too much, John."
"What about the baby?"
"It'll be okay."
"Forgive me, Abby. For the baby's sake."
I had completely forgotten about the little life inside me. God, I'm a terrible mother. Am I going to kill my own child once more? Either way, it couldn't help the situation now.
"No, John. This isn't about the baby, this is about us. About the fact that our relationship is over for good." No! I screamed to myself. Don't let him go! But I remained silent. There's nothing more that needed to be said.
He stood up, gazing into me for one last time. As much as I'd hate to admit it, I could still feel the bond. still feel his gaze reaching into my soul. I broke the gaze and held open the door for him to leave. "I want you to leave." I told him.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked, his expression pained.
"Go." I said quietly, unable to make myself look at him.
He walked out of the apartment slowly, not taking his eyes off me. "Abby, look at me." His voice was of such force that my eyes couldn't help but travel to his body. I stood at the door, transfixed. "I love you, Abby." He whispered. The words echoed through the hallway, mocking me. I slammed the door shut, blocking out the rest of the world. Abandoning the only man that I had truly ever loved.
"I love you too, Carter." I murmured and sank to the floor. Maybe this will work out someday. Maybe there's still hope for us. I closed my eyes and let the tears flow, allowing the earth to swallow me up. There's still hope..
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++++++++++++
Phew. That's it. The 3rd chapter. Hope you guys liked it. R AND R PLZPLZ!!!!
Thanks for those who reviewed.
Becky ------ Why????? Why why why won't you be adding any new chapters?? I thought u said there was more? Hehe. Sorry for that outbreak. that's just the same ol' typical MOI!! Thanks for reviewing.
CARBYfan --- Hehe. Thanks. even I myself don't know if it is the baby before. I think this is a totally new story though....... I think the baby don't have enough of a part in this fic. Hmm. maybe I gotta make the baby more important. What do u think? Thanks for reviewing.
Okay, it's the second time that this had happened. I've noticed that the second chapter of the fics usually have less reviews than the fist. WAY LESS. If This happens again, then it's the third time. Aha. What a charm.
Peace out, *~JeSS~*