"Stephanie today we are going to do something different, instead telling your story, I want you to write about how you felt the day that you tried to kill yourself"
"You want me to relieve that day that got me in here in the first place"
"I want you to feel like you are getting better, depression is a sad thing and by me making you do this you learn in days, weeks, months to come that you are not that weak, scared little girl that first came into my room and told me that you had a drug problem, when to be honest, you were lying to yourself, drugs are an issue but if your honest that is a cover up of what is really eating you up inside. I want you to release it. Fight your demons don't let them win"
_________________________________________________________________________________________
The day of reckoning was a pawn me the sunshine was towering the day was just beginning.
My life was becoming reckless; it was spiralling out of control. I had no control over what was said and what was done, my misery and suffering was near and life was running away from me I had become this shadow of my former self, but back then it was more my mothers' shadow rather than my own. I had know-one, I was alone in the world, know-one loved me, know-one even acknowledged me I was a loner in the planet we call Earth.
What I'm saying is that my life is not the be all and end all that some like to make out; no one else will miss me. That theory that everyone is here for a reason is a load of shit. What a difference I would make if I wasn't here I don't think. I would like to think that one day when this is all been said and done that someone may feel a bit of remorse for me as I am not one for wanting, I would still like some gratitude for living I didn't ask to be born, if I knew what would happen when I was, then I would sorely disagree with the person that made the decision that I had to be. So much so that I'm righting a wrong, of that misguided person's judgement.
I will be gone by the time you read this but my love for one will never die
_________________________________________________________________________________________
"Stephanie, you wrote that in present tense, do you still feel that way?"
"You asked me too, I only did what you asked of me"
"There is still a long way for you to go in your recovery, I understand everyone has a different recovery rate but for you to write that in present tense makes me think that you're not willing to help yourself"
WITH THAT STEPHANIE STORMS OUT THE ROOM IN FLOODS OF TEARS!