CREDITS!: This story makes no sense
****************************************************
SHIFT SCENE TO TIFA'S BAR.........
Sephiroth: Welcome to another eppisode of Sephy's World! Since I was banished from this story, you will all feel the wrath of the mighty Sephiroth!! bwahahaha.... wait, that expression has been said WAY too much in this story... ummm, hold on now...You will reep the rewards of my revenge! YES! hahahahaha! well anyway, here I grace the presence of Tifa's Bar with the losers of Avalanche. I demand that you tell me what you thought of the story, you pathetic mortals!
Nanaki: Such an epic tale of heroism speaks with --
Sephiroth: *rolls eyes* yeah, and watching paint dry would be more interesting. *performs Super Nova on him and he dies*
*A cheer rises throughout the land*
Yuffie: *grins showing many lost teeth* I caught 5 materia orbs!!! FIVE!! *laughs hysterically*
Reeve: my poor Cait Sith... how I miss him! *bawls* WHAT KIND OF SADISTIC AUTHOR WOULD KILL OFF SUCH AN EXCELLENT CHARACTER?????
Sephiroth: ...I dont even know where to begin on how wrong that statement was.
Reeve: I HATE THIS STORY!!!! *runs out of the room bawling*
*no one seems to care*
Sephiroth: ....so... how bout you?
Tifa: *pissed* I only got one line!!! what kinda F*cking story is this without Tifa?! This story is shit! *stomps out of the room*
*Cid starts laughing for no apparent reason*
*..and Cloud suddenly runs across the screen like a chocobo*
Cloud: AHHHHHHHHBOOGALALALCHA!
Barret: I pity da mofo dat struts up forgettin' ma bling bling! YO! You down wit da east side? You representin'?
Sephiroth:....jah?
Barret:...........foo'
Sephiroth:.......loser
Cid: hehehehehehehhehehehhhe!
Cloud GOOBAHBOOBAHGAH!
Sephiroth:... and thats my cue!
***************************************************
Sephiroth: And we're back! Say hello to the halls of Shinra! ....awww... such childfilled memories... aww... that's where I got probed for the first time *smiles* and that's where Hojo chased me with the hypodermic syringe *holds microphone close to his heart* what a kodiac moment that day was! *sheds a tear*... oh well, enough remenissing... talk to me shinra!
Reno: yo man! want a refressment?
Sephiroth: are you mad? i am above such human weaknesses! ach.. what fools these mortals be!
Rude: pass one this way buddy *sniff* i really need it *starts crying*
Reno: *pats rude on the back* Its okey man, you had a rough day.
Sephiroth: didnt like the story huh?
Rude: I HAD HAIR! BEAUTIFUL HAIR! EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN YOUR'S!
Sephiroth: Watch it Mr Kojack Clean! you're treading on some pretty dangerous territory!
Rude: *eye twitch* He put the two of them into one!! Kojack... Mr Clean! AHHHHHHH!! Ill get you, and your little puppet too! ah ahahaha!! *runs towards Sephiroth*
Sephiroth: yeah, how bout no? *puts his masamune to work*
Reno: *passes out from all the liquor intake he sustained in every fanfic story*
Sephiroth: well how about that? he does have a breaking point!.*laughs at his joke* now here is the lard bucket himself. Palmer! Youve never looked....uh... well, actually, u look just as fat as you did when i last saw you. hmm, maybe fatter.
Palmer: *in the process of being reconstructed from cans of lard by nameless Shinra soldiers* MHPPHK SFOMS GON!
Sephiroth: whats that?
Shinra soldier: he said he's hungry.
Sephiroth: hungry?
Palmer: *takes a bite out of his arm which is lard* please! save me from myself! *takes another bite*
Sephiroth: *shudders* thats just disturbing and i am leaving.
*sephiroth walks down the hall till he comes across dear old dad*
Sephiroth: DAD! how's it going!?
Hojo: ahh its you. come here son, i have imperitive news to tell you.
Sephiroth: yeah?! goodie! I get a secret! I get a secret! *dances over to Hojo*
Hojo: now with you're help, I have a plan that could make us take over the w-- *looks at camera* what the hell is that doing here?!
Sephiroth:... its Sephy's World! Dont you remember my tv show?? YOU DONT EVEN WATCH IT DO YOU?!?
Hojo: ahh... yes... well..... Sephy's World is just gonna have to be put on hold *shoots the camera man*
*camera falls to the ground and breaks and the screen goes fuzzy*
*******************************************************
Sephiroth: well, after an hour of travelling and a new camera man, here we are at the master suite in the honey bee inn! It is my honor to present to the audience, the author of this story, Kimmie!
Author: *Bows* thank you all! now would you excuse me, we're kinda busy here!
*screen shows kimmie in the hot tub with various men... vincent, janus, legolas... ect*
Vincent: i dont know how u convinced me into this.
Janus: I am not even in this game. let alone this time period! Do you know that you're interrupting my search for Shala????
Author: *rolls eyes* face it janus! shes dead!
Janus: *puts head down and starts crying* SHAALLLAAAA!!!
Legolas: i havent had so much fun in 10 000 years!
Author: damn you and your immortallity!
*Theres frantic knocking on the door*
Dark_Angel666 and Skurvey Kat: LET US IN!!!
Dark_angel666: Ill give you a cookie!
Skurvey Kat: Ill give you my brain!
Author: Nope! No dice! everyone, out!.....wait, not you Sephiroth, you can stay!
Sephiroth: *shrugs* okey!
***************************************************
Sephiroth: Well, I hope you liked this Eppisode of Sephy's World! Btw, dont bother telling me, I know there was nothing to do with credits. but we well get to that! In closing, here are a few of the random characters that are pointless to the plot! Let us remember these brave souls!
Shera: F*CK YOU CID! F*CK YOU AND UR DAMN MEDS!
Innocent bystanders: Oh get ready for that class action suit you B*STARDS!
Really dumb hicks of neibleheim: It was a vampire it was! Deese peepers dont lie!
Nurse from the insane assylum: *singing* Puff the magic dragon lived by the sea... OH! didnt see u there! WHO WANTS SUM MORPHINE?
The tumbleweed: *rolls by and bows to its loyal fans*
Sparkling soda vending machine: *Just stands there-- what do you expect it to do?*
Cait Sith #34957439574394: *Is shot down by vincent*
Sephiroth: And so ends a magnificant story. See you all on the other side! bwhahaahahahahha! *disapears into a *POOF!* of smoke*
**********************************
Actual credits:
Cloud: became a millionaire selling collectable underware on E-bay
Cid: Stays up late listening to Jimmy Hendrix and Pink Floyd while taking his meds. he was cured in a week, but that doesnt stop him, no siree!
Shera: eventually joined Cid, and has mastered the art of Zen.
Vincent: is still tanning, keeping the dream alive!
Nurse: has become a drug lord selling morphine, all the while keeping her day job!
Reno: eventually admitted himself into the Betty Ford clinic, became friends with the Nurse, and hasn't thought about beer since!
Rude: spends all of his time trying on wigs, and bicotting Mr Clean because of harmfull stereotypes.
Hojo/Blowjo: is finishing his plans to take over the world, but his plans are foiled my triple Q who has turned the other cheek to evilness.
Palmer/Triple Q: Lard salesman by day, super hero by night.
Naniki: has successfully cured insomnia.
Yuffie: Has recently appeared on "Ripley's: Believe it or Not", making the world record of catching 100 materia orbs in her mouth in 60 seconds!
Barret: has become a full-time impersonater of Mr T, performing 1-800- COLLECT commercials, with his new "pal" Carrot Top!
Tifa: has mastered the art of Tai-Bo, and is currently Palmer's personal trainer.
Aeris: Lives on in the Lifestream, occasionally scaring little kids in the church as a ghost for kicks.
Reeve: is in the process of building Cait Sith #124323523453465436
Skurvey Kat: is still an author recovering from rope burn.
Dark_angel666: still writes poems, and is currently spending her wheelbarrow of money on getting the rights of Vincent.
Rufus: Has mysteriously vanished after getting hit by the can of lard. Some say he has gained an interest in lard, and weighs over 500 pounds!
Author: is still alive, believe it or not, writing and happy!
******************************************
A/n: Thanks to all those who read my stories, reviewed, or just read the first chapter and thought it was crap! This story took 6 or 7 months! it is done! hurrah! please, review, and tell me what u thought of the whole story!
THE END (for real this time)
****************************************************
SHIFT SCENE TO TIFA'S BAR.........
Sephiroth: Welcome to another eppisode of Sephy's World! Since I was banished from this story, you will all feel the wrath of the mighty Sephiroth!! bwahahaha.... wait, that expression has been said WAY too much in this story... ummm, hold on now...You will reep the rewards of my revenge! YES! hahahahaha! well anyway, here I grace the presence of Tifa's Bar with the losers of Avalanche. I demand that you tell me what you thought of the story, you pathetic mortals!
Nanaki: Such an epic tale of heroism speaks with --
Sephiroth: *rolls eyes* yeah, and watching paint dry would be more interesting. *performs Super Nova on him and he dies*
*A cheer rises throughout the land*
Yuffie: *grins showing many lost teeth* I caught 5 materia orbs!!! FIVE!! *laughs hysterically*
Reeve: my poor Cait Sith... how I miss him! *bawls* WHAT KIND OF SADISTIC AUTHOR WOULD KILL OFF SUCH AN EXCELLENT CHARACTER?????
Sephiroth: ...I dont even know where to begin on how wrong that statement was.
Reeve: I HATE THIS STORY!!!! *runs out of the room bawling*
*no one seems to care*
Sephiroth: ....so... how bout you?
Tifa: *pissed* I only got one line!!! what kinda F*cking story is this without Tifa?! This story is shit! *stomps out of the room*
*Cid starts laughing for no apparent reason*
*..and Cloud suddenly runs across the screen like a chocobo*
Cloud: AHHHHHHHHBOOGALALALCHA!
Barret: I pity da mofo dat struts up forgettin' ma bling bling! YO! You down wit da east side? You representin'?
Sephiroth:....jah?
Barret:...........foo'
Sephiroth:.......loser
Cid: hehehehehehehhehehehhhe!
Cloud GOOBAHBOOBAHGAH!
Sephiroth:... and thats my cue!
***************************************************
Sephiroth: And we're back! Say hello to the halls of Shinra! ....awww... such childfilled memories... aww... that's where I got probed for the first time *smiles* and that's where Hojo chased me with the hypodermic syringe *holds microphone close to his heart* what a kodiac moment that day was! *sheds a tear*... oh well, enough remenissing... talk to me shinra!
Reno: yo man! want a refressment?
Sephiroth: are you mad? i am above such human weaknesses! ach.. what fools these mortals be!
Rude: pass one this way buddy *sniff* i really need it *starts crying*
Reno: *pats rude on the back* Its okey man, you had a rough day.
Sephiroth: didnt like the story huh?
Rude: I HAD HAIR! BEAUTIFUL HAIR! EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN YOUR'S!
Sephiroth: Watch it Mr Kojack Clean! you're treading on some pretty dangerous territory!
Rude: *eye twitch* He put the two of them into one!! Kojack... Mr Clean! AHHHHHHH!! Ill get you, and your little puppet too! ah ahahaha!! *runs towards Sephiroth*
Sephiroth: yeah, how bout no? *puts his masamune to work*
Reno: *passes out from all the liquor intake he sustained in every fanfic story*
Sephiroth: well how about that? he does have a breaking point!.*laughs at his joke* now here is the lard bucket himself. Palmer! Youve never looked....uh... well, actually, u look just as fat as you did when i last saw you. hmm, maybe fatter.
Palmer: *in the process of being reconstructed from cans of lard by nameless Shinra soldiers* MHPPHK SFOMS GON!
Sephiroth: whats that?
Shinra soldier: he said he's hungry.
Sephiroth: hungry?
Palmer: *takes a bite out of his arm which is lard* please! save me from myself! *takes another bite*
Sephiroth: *shudders* thats just disturbing and i am leaving.
*sephiroth walks down the hall till he comes across dear old dad*
Sephiroth: DAD! how's it going!?
Hojo: ahh its you. come here son, i have imperitive news to tell you.
Sephiroth: yeah?! goodie! I get a secret! I get a secret! *dances over to Hojo*
Hojo: now with you're help, I have a plan that could make us take over the w-- *looks at camera* what the hell is that doing here?!
Sephiroth:... its Sephy's World! Dont you remember my tv show?? YOU DONT EVEN WATCH IT DO YOU?!?
Hojo: ahh... yes... well..... Sephy's World is just gonna have to be put on hold *shoots the camera man*
*camera falls to the ground and breaks and the screen goes fuzzy*
*******************************************************
Sephiroth: well, after an hour of travelling and a new camera man, here we are at the master suite in the honey bee inn! It is my honor to present to the audience, the author of this story, Kimmie!
Author: *Bows* thank you all! now would you excuse me, we're kinda busy here!
*screen shows kimmie in the hot tub with various men... vincent, janus, legolas... ect*
Vincent: i dont know how u convinced me into this.
Janus: I am not even in this game. let alone this time period! Do you know that you're interrupting my search for Shala????
Author: *rolls eyes* face it janus! shes dead!
Janus: *puts head down and starts crying* SHAALLLAAAA!!!
Legolas: i havent had so much fun in 10 000 years!
Author: damn you and your immortallity!
*Theres frantic knocking on the door*
Dark_Angel666 and Skurvey Kat: LET US IN!!!
Dark_angel666: Ill give you a cookie!
Skurvey Kat: Ill give you my brain!
Author: Nope! No dice! everyone, out!.....wait, not you Sephiroth, you can stay!
Sephiroth: *shrugs* okey!
***************************************************
Sephiroth: Well, I hope you liked this Eppisode of Sephy's World! Btw, dont bother telling me, I know there was nothing to do with credits. but we well get to that! In closing, here are a few of the random characters that are pointless to the plot! Let us remember these brave souls!
Shera: F*CK YOU CID! F*CK YOU AND UR DAMN MEDS!
Innocent bystanders: Oh get ready for that class action suit you B*STARDS!
Really dumb hicks of neibleheim: It was a vampire it was! Deese peepers dont lie!
Nurse from the insane assylum: *singing* Puff the magic dragon lived by the sea... OH! didnt see u there! WHO WANTS SUM MORPHINE?
The tumbleweed: *rolls by and bows to its loyal fans*
Sparkling soda vending machine: *Just stands there-- what do you expect it to do?*
Cait Sith #34957439574394: *Is shot down by vincent*
Sephiroth: And so ends a magnificant story. See you all on the other side! bwhahaahahahahha! *disapears into a *POOF!* of smoke*
**********************************
Actual credits:
Cloud: became a millionaire selling collectable underware on E-bay
Cid: Stays up late listening to Jimmy Hendrix and Pink Floyd while taking his meds. he was cured in a week, but that doesnt stop him, no siree!
Shera: eventually joined Cid, and has mastered the art of Zen.
Vincent: is still tanning, keeping the dream alive!
Nurse: has become a drug lord selling morphine, all the while keeping her day job!
Reno: eventually admitted himself into the Betty Ford clinic, became friends with the Nurse, and hasn't thought about beer since!
Rude: spends all of his time trying on wigs, and bicotting Mr Clean because of harmfull stereotypes.
Hojo/Blowjo: is finishing his plans to take over the world, but his plans are foiled my triple Q who has turned the other cheek to evilness.
Palmer/Triple Q: Lard salesman by day, super hero by night.
Naniki: has successfully cured insomnia.
Yuffie: Has recently appeared on "Ripley's: Believe it or Not", making the world record of catching 100 materia orbs in her mouth in 60 seconds!
Barret: has become a full-time impersonater of Mr T, performing 1-800- COLLECT commercials, with his new "pal" Carrot Top!
Tifa: has mastered the art of Tai-Bo, and is currently Palmer's personal trainer.
Aeris: Lives on in the Lifestream, occasionally scaring little kids in the church as a ghost for kicks.
Reeve: is in the process of building Cait Sith #124323523453465436
Skurvey Kat: is still an author recovering from rope burn.
Dark_angel666: still writes poems, and is currently spending her wheelbarrow of money on getting the rights of Vincent.
Rufus: Has mysteriously vanished after getting hit by the can of lard. Some say he has gained an interest in lard, and weighs over 500 pounds!
Author: is still alive, believe it or not, writing and happy!
******************************************
A/n: Thanks to all those who read my stories, reviewed, or just read the first chapter and thought it was crap! This story took 6 or 7 months! it is done! hurrah! please, review, and tell me what u thought of the whole story!
THE END (for real this time)