CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
The front door of the house on Revello Drive was thrown open by a very proud new father. It'd been two days since Daya and Nathan had been born and Spike had hardly left Buffy's side in the hospital.
"Nice of Dawn to come with us an' help." Spike said struggling with numerous bags, to giant teddy bears and a new baby balloon.
"She thought we might want some time alone with them, you know she's talking about moving out." Buffy said walking into home with two baby carriers.
She noted the look of shock horror on Spike's face, she knew that Spike had become even closer to Dawn since he'd been back but she didn't think he'd have a problem with her moving out.
"The Nibblet?" He questioned
"Come on you know that's she's not you little Nibble any more, she's in her thirties." Buffy said sitting down like she hadn't sat down in years.
"Yeah but, the Nibblet? She doesn't have to go because of us, she knows that doesn't she." Spike said now that he had started to pace.
Buffy watched him, there had always been something between Spike and Dawn that she never understood, when they were together it was like she was fifteen and he was twenty. Sometimes in made her feel a little jealous that she would never get to have that sort of connection with Spike, but then she looked at Daya and Nathan and her jealousy lifted she had a different connection with him.
Spike sat on the arm of the car that Buffy was sat at, their two children placed in their baby carriers on the floor, this was happiness.
"You looked tired honey." Spike said as he planted kisses on to the top of Buffy's head. He felt Buffy snuggle up against his body.
"I am, but they're going to need a feed in half an hour so I'm going to stay awake until then." Buffy said trying to push back the yawn that was escaping.
When Joy had been born Nicola was still alive so both and Spike shared the care of their little girl, Spike looked at Buffy yawning wondering how she ever managed when she had William.
"You need to sleep now pet, I can take care of them you go to bed."
Buffy noted that it wasn't a suggestion it was an order, what was he thinking? Since when did Buffy take orders for Spike? He might be right but she wasn't going to let him now that, and if she went to bed before the twins had their feed she wouldn't sleep anyway.
"Nope I'll mess up the system and I won't sleep without you honey." Buffy said using naked cuddling to keep him from carrying her upstairs and locking her in their bedroom.
Spike eyed her with suspicion, he knew that she was trying to do. He'd let her get away with it, not that he had much choice in it anyway. Fine she wanted to stick to the system then he would make sure she helped and didn't just fall asleep on the sofa.
~*~
All the things she'd seen in her time as a Slayer and all the things she battled nothing compared to this. She held her wriggling baby girl close to her chest as she fed her the last of her bottle. Spike was just finishing changing Nathan's nappy.
"They wriggle so much for me they just seem to stay calm for you it's not fair." Buffy said with a little pout on her face.
"That's just cuz they're so excited to be close to you love, just like I always am." Spike replied wiggling his eyebrows. He was glad to see that the blatant flattery was making Buffy smile.
"All done." Buffy told Spike as she handed Daya over to him and reached out for Nathan.
Spike sat Daya up in his arms and rubbed her back trying to bring up any trapped wind, he almost laughed at himself when he thought about how ridiculous the whole situation was. An ex-vampire and his ex-slayer lover tending to their children together.
Buffy held a new bottle up to Nathan's mouth and watched with pure fascination as he sucked it into his mouth.
"I love you." Spike said.
"I love you too." Buffy replied.
Spike felt the urge to ask again, she had warned him to leave it but Spike had never listened to her warnings in the past and with this being so important he wasn't going to start.
"Buffy, Slayer, I want you to marry me." He blurted the words so fast that she couldn't stop him and now they were out there.
She looked at him noting the grin on his face. He knew that if he asked her then she wouldn't be able to shout and scream at his because the children were there. Maybe it was time to talk about it, get her feeling out in the open then hopefully he'd leave it alone for a while.
"Explain to me why you want to marry me." She asked shocking him by the tone of her answer, no shouting no changing the subject.
"For a start it's only proper now that we have the children, and I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my time on this earth." Spike explained his eyes a wash the honesty.
He watched Buffy for her reaction, it wasn't pleasing he saw the anger start to boil in her eyes. She knew that she had to keep calm and that made her even angrier.
"Just as I thought, you only want to be my husband because we've got kids together. I thought you of all vampires moved with the times but no those Victorian values just keep coming back to bite me in the arse." Her words harsh but the tone soft and soothing.
"Sorry did I miss something happening in this conversation, since when did my date of birth come into it?" Spike said, honestly confused.
Buffy felt like ringing his neck, he understood her better than anyone else she'd ever known but he never could see her true feelings when it came to him.
"Me and you we're good together, we're happy why do we have to get married to be together for the rest of our lives?" She asked.
"We don't have to, but don't you think it'd be nice for us and for the kids, not just these to but Joy and Will as well? I want us all to be happy." Spike said getting more and more frustrated with the conversation.
Buffy started to bite her lip, part of her felt her that Spike was right, if he continued he'd convince her but that wasn't the way it should be, it should happen because they both wanted it.
"Spike stop, please, I love you but this isn't how I want it to be." She said hearing a little growl for him.
"I thought I understood you but now I'm thinking that I never did and never will." Buffy watched his Spike the words. He couldn't even look up into her eyes, he reminded fixed on Daya who was happily burping away.
"We had two children that we never thought we'd have thrust upon us, don't get me wrong I love them and I'm glad we've got them but we shouldn't use them as a reason to jump into getting married. Would you have asked me if I wasn't pregnant?"
"Yes I would have. Maybe not then at that moment, but I would have, I want to be with you." Spike said on the verge tears, Buffy was always with the rejection.
"Please Spike I love you."
"Do you? Do you really love me? All you ever do is reject me." He said the tears flowing freely now.
It struck her, even after all they had gotten thought together he still thought that she thought he was beneath her. That was the worst thing she had ever said to him and no matter how much love she gave him now she could never make up for it. "I do love you, so much I love you with all my heart, but when we get married I want it to be because I want to and the moment takes us." She said handing Nathan over to him after he put Daya back into her carrier.
"When we get married." The tears had stopped and Buffy saw a flicker of hope in his eyes.
"Yes when. You can carry on asking me and I'm sure one day I'll say yes just not yet." Buffy said leaning over to kiss Spike.
Hope. There was hope Spike thought, one day she would say yes.
TBC..
The front door of the house on Revello Drive was thrown open by a very proud new father. It'd been two days since Daya and Nathan had been born and Spike had hardly left Buffy's side in the hospital.
"Nice of Dawn to come with us an' help." Spike said struggling with numerous bags, to giant teddy bears and a new baby balloon.
"She thought we might want some time alone with them, you know she's talking about moving out." Buffy said walking into home with two baby carriers.
She noted the look of shock horror on Spike's face, she knew that Spike had become even closer to Dawn since he'd been back but she didn't think he'd have a problem with her moving out.
"The Nibblet?" He questioned
"Come on you know that's she's not you little Nibble any more, she's in her thirties." Buffy said sitting down like she hadn't sat down in years.
"Yeah but, the Nibblet? She doesn't have to go because of us, she knows that doesn't she." Spike said now that he had started to pace.
Buffy watched him, there had always been something between Spike and Dawn that she never understood, when they were together it was like she was fifteen and he was twenty. Sometimes in made her feel a little jealous that she would never get to have that sort of connection with Spike, but then she looked at Daya and Nathan and her jealousy lifted she had a different connection with him.
Spike sat on the arm of the car that Buffy was sat at, their two children placed in their baby carriers on the floor, this was happiness.
"You looked tired honey." Spike said as he planted kisses on to the top of Buffy's head. He felt Buffy snuggle up against his body.
"I am, but they're going to need a feed in half an hour so I'm going to stay awake until then." Buffy said trying to push back the yawn that was escaping.
When Joy had been born Nicola was still alive so both and Spike shared the care of their little girl, Spike looked at Buffy yawning wondering how she ever managed when she had William.
"You need to sleep now pet, I can take care of them you go to bed."
Buffy noted that it wasn't a suggestion it was an order, what was he thinking? Since when did Buffy take orders for Spike? He might be right but she wasn't going to let him now that, and if she went to bed before the twins had their feed she wouldn't sleep anyway.
"Nope I'll mess up the system and I won't sleep without you honey." Buffy said using naked cuddling to keep him from carrying her upstairs and locking her in their bedroom.
Spike eyed her with suspicion, he knew that she was trying to do. He'd let her get away with it, not that he had much choice in it anyway. Fine she wanted to stick to the system then he would make sure she helped and didn't just fall asleep on the sofa.
~*~
All the things she'd seen in her time as a Slayer and all the things she battled nothing compared to this. She held her wriggling baby girl close to her chest as she fed her the last of her bottle. Spike was just finishing changing Nathan's nappy.
"They wriggle so much for me they just seem to stay calm for you it's not fair." Buffy said with a little pout on her face.
"That's just cuz they're so excited to be close to you love, just like I always am." Spike replied wiggling his eyebrows. He was glad to see that the blatant flattery was making Buffy smile.
"All done." Buffy told Spike as she handed Daya over to him and reached out for Nathan.
Spike sat Daya up in his arms and rubbed her back trying to bring up any trapped wind, he almost laughed at himself when he thought about how ridiculous the whole situation was. An ex-vampire and his ex-slayer lover tending to their children together.
Buffy held a new bottle up to Nathan's mouth and watched with pure fascination as he sucked it into his mouth.
"I love you." Spike said.
"I love you too." Buffy replied.
Spike felt the urge to ask again, she had warned him to leave it but Spike had never listened to her warnings in the past and with this being so important he wasn't going to start.
"Buffy, Slayer, I want you to marry me." He blurted the words so fast that she couldn't stop him and now they were out there.
She looked at him noting the grin on his face. He knew that if he asked her then she wouldn't be able to shout and scream at his because the children were there. Maybe it was time to talk about it, get her feeling out in the open then hopefully he'd leave it alone for a while.
"Explain to me why you want to marry me." She asked shocking him by the tone of her answer, no shouting no changing the subject.
"For a start it's only proper now that we have the children, and I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my time on this earth." Spike explained his eyes a wash the honesty.
He watched Buffy for her reaction, it wasn't pleasing he saw the anger start to boil in her eyes. She knew that she had to keep calm and that made her even angrier.
"Just as I thought, you only want to be my husband because we've got kids together. I thought you of all vampires moved with the times but no those Victorian values just keep coming back to bite me in the arse." Her words harsh but the tone soft and soothing.
"Sorry did I miss something happening in this conversation, since when did my date of birth come into it?" Spike said, honestly confused.
Buffy felt like ringing his neck, he understood her better than anyone else she'd ever known but he never could see her true feelings when it came to him.
"Me and you we're good together, we're happy why do we have to get married to be together for the rest of our lives?" She asked.
"We don't have to, but don't you think it'd be nice for us and for the kids, not just these to but Joy and Will as well? I want us all to be happy." Spike said getting more and more frustrated with the conversation.
Buffy started to bite her lip, part of her felt her that Spike was right, if he continued he'd convince her but that wasn't the way it should be, it should happen because they both wanted it.
"Spike stop, please, I love you but this isn't how I want it to be." She said hearing a little growl for him.
"I thought I understood you but now I'm thinking that I never did and never will." Buffy watched his Spike the words. He couldn't even look up into her eyes, he reminded fixed on Daya who was happily burping away.
"We had two children that we never thought we'd have thrust upon us, don't get me wrong I love them and I'm glad we've got them but we shouldn't use them as a reason to jump into getting married. Would you have asked me if I wasn't pregnant?"
"Yes I would have. Maybe not then at that moment, but I would have, I want to be with you." Spike said on the verge tears, Buffy was always with the rejection.
"Please Spike I love you."
"Do you? Do you really love me? All you ever do is reject me." He said the tears flowing freely now.
It struck her, even after all they had gotten thought together he still thought that she thought he was beneath her. That was the worst thing she had ever said to him and no matter how much love she gave him now she could never make up for it. "I do love you, so much I love you with all my heart, but when we get married I want it to be because I want to and the moment takes us." She said handing Nathan over to him after he put Daya back into her carrier.
"When we get married." The tears had stopped and Buffy saw a flicker of hope in his eyes.
"Yes when. You can carry on asking me and I'm sure one day I'll say yes just not yet." Buffy said leaning over to kiss Spike.
Hope. There was hope Spike thought, one day she would say yes.
TBC..