Chapter 8 - Second Name Change And A Mongoose Or Two
"Cousin hWilfred!" Louisa trilled, catching his arm before he could take to his heels.
"hIt's so hLOVELY to see hyou! Who's the hlucky damsel?"
"How did you know I was getting married?" Wilfred said weakly, resigned to his fate.
"Oh, hMummy hwrote hme," Louisa giggled, marching forward. "Is this the hway to the cathedral?"
"Garden," he mumbled.
"hPardon?"
"The ceremony is being held in her father's garden," he replied miserably.
"hWhat a hluffly hidea! hIsn't hit, hLadies?"
"Oh, yes."
"Quite, quite."
"Will there be champagne?"
Louisa suddenly stopped in the middle of the street, swinging the still walking Wilfred of his feet. She spun around. "hYou haven't hmet my hnewest Ladies, hWilfred!" she cried.
Wilfred and Tomiyo waited through the lengthy, suggestive introductions under twin clouds. "hAnd this is Tomiyo," Louisa said finally. Tomiyo lifted an arm miserably, and sent Wilfred a Man Message in Eyebrow Morse Code.
"They're all very... charming," Wilfred managed, a fixed grin occupying most of his horrified face. Louisa had added that Theodora was a fine catch, if hyou catch her drift, hmm-hmm. "Er... is there something wrong with the Auriental one?"
"Oh, hno, she's just hnew," Louisa tittered. "hNot hused to the hlifestyle hyet."
There was an uncomfortable pause.
"Ah," said Wilfred, distantly, witnessing things in his head that no man should ever be forced to see, unless of course his tastes ran that way and in that case by all means. But please, get a room.
"And hyour hwife to be?"
"Wilfred!"
They all turned. A quite lovely, delicate young lady was picking her way toward them, a nurse trailing after her wailing things about bad luck. "Wilfred, who these women?" she asked, as she reached them. The nurse appeared to have given up, and stood behind her mistress sullenly.
"A-a-a-ah! Darling!" Wilfred squeaked. "This... is... my... cousin! Yes! My, um, cousin, Louisa." Louisa curtsied.
"And the others?" his fiancee asked, her almond-shaped eyes narrowing.
"Louisa's, um, friends," Wilfred managed.
There was a pause.
"Is there something wrong with the Auriental one?" she asked.
Tomiyo had been staring at her the entire time, trying to ignore the proof his eyes were laying before him. "Blast," he said. "You're Two Delicate Mongooses, aren't you?"
Two Delicate Mongooses stared at her brother. "One Strong Tulip," she said after a moment, her voice strained, "what are you doing in a dress?"
The silence was deafening.
"Have some more tea."
"Thank you."
"Is the tea spiked?"
"hNO, hWilhelmina."
"Pity."
Pause.
"So!" Two Delicate Mongooses said brightly, setting down her teacup. "How have you been, One Strong Tulip?"
"When we met her she was a cabin boy under the name of Tokidoki," Wilhelmina interjected, sloshing her tea a bit.
One Strong Tulip winced. "I'm a HE," he said, for the third time since coming into Muntab.
"It was the only way to get him off the boat," Theodora commented. "We're sort of blackmailing each other."
Pause.
"Blackmailing?" Wilfred asked.
"He's got some dirt on us, and we" -Wilhelmina gleefully patted her bag, which contained a dozen iconographs of Tokidoki transforming into Tomiyo- "now have some dirt on him."
"Dirt," said Two Delicate Mongooses, looking at her brother with brows raised. "Father will be so glad to see you again."
One Strong Tulip smiled, horrified. "Wilfred!" he squeaked. "Do you have any spare clothing?"
"Cousin hWilfred!" Louisa trilled, catching his arm before he could take to his heels.
"hIt's so hLOVELY to see hyou! Who's the hlucky damsel?"
"How did you know I was getting married?" Wilfred said weakly, resigned to his fate.
"Oh, hMummy hwrote hme," Louisa giggled, marching forward. "Is this the hway to the cathedral?"
"Garden," he mumbled.
"hPardon?"
"The ceremony is being held in her father's garden," he replied miserably.
"hWhat a hluffly hidea! hIsn't hit, hLadies?"
"Oh, yes."
"Quite, quite."
"Will there be champagne?"
Louisa suddenly stopped in the middle of the street, swinging the still walking Wilfred of his feet. She spun around. "hYou haven't hmet my hnewest Ladies, hWilfred!" she cried.
Wilfred and Tomiyo waited through the lengthy, suggestive introductions under twin clouds. "hAnd this is Tomiyo," Louisa said finally. Tomiyo lifted an arm miserably, and sent Wilfred a Man Message in Eyebrow Morse Code.
"They're all very... charming," Wilfred managed, a fixed grin occupying most of his horrified face. Louisa had added that Theodora was a fine catch, if hyou catch her drift, hmm-hmm. "Er... is there something wrong with the Auriental one?"
"Oh, hno, she's just hnew," Louisa tittered. "hNot hused to the hlifestyle hyet."
There was an uncomfortable pause.
"Ah," said Wilfred, distantly, witnessing things in his head that no man should ever be forced to see, unless of course his tastes ran that way and in that case by all means. But please, get a room.
"And hyour hwife to be?"
"Wilfred!"
They all turned. A quite lovely, delicate young lady was picking her way toward them, a nurse trailing after her wailing things about bad luck. "Wilfred, who these women?" she asked, as she reached them. The nurse appeared to have given up, and stood behind her mistress sullenly.
"A-a-a-ah! Darling!" Wilfred squeaked. "This... is... my... cousin! Yes! My, um, cousin, Louisa." Louisa curtsied.
"And the others?" his fiancee asked, her almond-shaped eyes narrowing.
"Louisa's, um, friends," Wilfred managed.
There was a pause.
"Is there something wrong with the Auriental one?" she asked.
Tomiyo had been staring at her the entire time, trying to ignore the proof his eyes were laying before him. "Blast," he said. "You're Two Delicate Mongooses, aren't you?"
Two Delicate Mongooses stared at her brother. "One Strong Tulip," she said after a moment, her voice strained, "what are you doing in a dress?"
The silence was deafening.
"Have some more tea."
"Thank you."
"Is the tea spiked?"
"hNO, hWilhelmina."
"Pity."
Pause.
"So!" Two Delicate Mongooses said brightly, setting down her teacup. "How have you been, One Strong Tulip?"
"When we met her she was a cabin boy under the name of Tokidoki," Wilhelmina interjected, sloshing her tea a bit.
One Strong Tulip winced. "I'm a HE," he said, for the third time since coming into Muntab.
"It was the only way to get him off the boat," Theodora commented. "We're sort of blackmailing each other."
Pause.
"Blackmailing?" Wilfred asked.
"He's got some dirt on us, and we" -Wilhelmina gleefully patted her bag, which contained a dozen iconographs of Tokidoki transforming into Tomiyo- "now have some dirt on him."
"Dirt," said Two Delicate Mongooses, looking at her brother with brows raised. "Father will be so glad to see you again."
One Strong Tulip smiled, horrified. "Wilfred!" he squeaked. "Do you have any spare clothing?"