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"Jack, run away to Alaska with me!" Jack frowned.

"Alaska?"

"Yes! We'll see those moose you mentioned, and no one will ever think to look for us there!" Jack nodded thoughtfully.

"Let's go see the meese! We can get an igloo and sit there and just watch meese all day!" Irina smacked her forehead.

"Let's go, Jack. We can talk about animals on the way…" Hand in hand, they walked out, with Jack excitedly rambling on about 'meese' while Irina rolled her eyes.

Suddenly, the meese conversation died down, and they stopped walking. Irina stole a quick glance at Jack—he was deep in thought, and obviously troubled. It was his usual look.

"Ah, Jack? Is something bothering you?" she asked, unsure if there was really something wrong or if he'd just realized that it really is moose and not meese. His gaze met hers, his eyes filled with uncertainty.

"Are there any sporks in Alaska? I'm not sure I can go if there aren't."

"Jack Bristow!! I cannot believe this!!"

"What??" he asked defensively. "You know I've only used sporks ever since that… incident with the fork!!"

Irina cringed. She didn't want to remember the fork incident. There were just too many bad memories that were bound to resurface if she let her self think about that.

"I'm sure they have sporks in Alaska, Jack."

"Then I guess I have no choice but to go with you. But Irina, how do we get there?"

"You see Jack, these washing machines all use the same amount of laundry detergent. Now if you replace two thirds of the detergent with this," Irina stated, holding up a bottle of super- high-strength Mr. Clean, "you have yourself one high-powered laundromatmobille."

"Are you sure this will work?"

"Yes, of course it will work. I've spent three months on a steel mattress. It will work." Jack wasn't sure how the mattress had anything to do with getting to Alaska, but Irina was usually right.

"And you're absolutely positively sure they have sporks there?"

Before he knew it, Jack was helping Irina hack into the laundromat's main server.

Irina had already convinced the manager on duty that it was a new safety regulation and she was sent by the Board of Health to safe-tize their system.

Teenage boys are so gullible, she thought to herself as she entered the final codes allowing her to gain unrestricted access into the central soap and cleaning solution regulation database.

"We're done," Irina proclaimed. "Get in."

"Get in? Where?" Jack really was hoping she didn't want him to climb into the washer.

"Where do you think Jack? Just climb in, there's plenty of room in here." Jack stood there staring at Irina who was motioning for him to climb into the same washer she had already squeezed herself into.

Jack turned and looked out the large front window as he heard the screeching of breaks. Kendall jumped out of his car and stomped into the Laundromat.

"Good morning Jack."

"Kendall, what brings you here?"

"That's none of your business but when I find who has been messing with the coffee maker... oooh boy, they're gonna get it." Jack nodded not quite knowing what he was talking about until he glanced down at the large stain on Kendall's shirt.

"And what, may I ask, are you doing here Jack?"

"Um, I'm just doing some laundry. See, look it's already done!" Jack said nervously as he climbed into the washing machine-turned-laundromatmobile and slammed the door behind him.


"Let's get out of here!" he shouted.

"Jeez, Jack you really don't need to yell. I'm sitting about two inches from your face."

Well, this should make for one interesting ride, thought Jack, who was trying his hardest not to grin.

Kendall, on the other hand was just downright confused. Did he really just witness Jack Bristow climb into a washing machine, and how the heck did it start flying?
Kendall made a note of remembering to lecture Jack on how that might blow his cover.

A little while later, Jack and Irina's laundromatmobile was somewhere over Canada. Or maybe Oregon. Or perhaps even Washington. Either way, it was somewhere, and they were certainly on their way to Alaska… or so they hoped.

"Just how fast can this thing go?" Jack asked. Irina shifted slightly.

"Very," she said quickly.

"Can you be a bit more precise?"

"Ok… it can really go very fast."

"A number, Irina. How many miles per hour can it go?"

"Well… more than 5, I'm sure…" Jack looked at her curiously.

"You don't know!"

"What? Jack, don't be absurd! Of course I know! I just told you, it goes faster than 5 miles per hour!"

"True, but you can't give me an exact speed."

"Yes I can. I simply choose not to." Jack rolled his eyes at the statement.

"Sure Irina."

"Well, it's true!!" Irina whined. Jack blinked in surprise.

"Irina… I've never heard you make that noise before." Suddenly, Irina's whole demeanor changed as she wiggled her eyebrows.

"There are plenty of other noises you HAVE heard me make…" Jack raised one eyebrow calmly but suggestively.

"Well, that's certainly true… are there any other noises I have yet to hear?"

"Well, there's only one way to find out…" Irina purred, very glad that the laundromatmobile had an auto option…