He knew the story now, of the orphan boy who went to the finest military academy in the world to become a mercenary. The boy had great potential, but wasted it on a power hungry sorceress and empty promises. Quistis had told him everything about himself, or rather, about Seifer Almasy, and the only parts he remembered were the ones regarding Ultimecia. These other sorceresses that Quistis spoke of, Adel, Edea and Rinoa, Street Rat could not recall them. Nor could he recall any of the people from the 'Orphanage Gang,' and he found it a little upsetting. Perhaps he wasn't this Seifer Almasy after all, and a little part of him hoped that he really was just a street rat, and not this man who'd done horrid things in the name of glory.
"We're nearly to Balamb," Quistis informed him, and she gave him a light squeeze on the shoulder.
Street Rat was drawn to her eyes as he'd been so many times over the last few days. There was a cool professionalism there that masked a deep vulnerability which he understood she wished to keep secret from the world. Her fragility was easy enough to read, should one care to look beyond the surface, and Street Rat could see how her businesslike demeanor hid what was really going on. He was curious, but he knew better than to ask, for she was the kind of woman who would hide her true self from everyone but the man she gave her heart to. It wasn't his place to inquire upon it anyhow, and a woman like this would never be interested in a man like him. He was street trash, and maybe, if he truly was Seifer Almasy, he might also be called a murderer.
"Sure this is a good idea?" he asked as he shifted in his seat and forced himself to tear his eyes away from hers.
"No, I'm not," she said. "But I can't think of any other way for you to remember."
"Maybe it's best if I don't. Doesn't sound like I was a very nice guy."
"You weren't," she said with a chuckle. "But part of you must have been good for you to be as you are now."
Street Rat didn't have any reply to that. He couldn't exactly say he was good, for he'd made his living as a thief. To eat, he'd had to steal. Wallets, mostly. And he had served Ultimecia, that Hyneforsaken bitch who'd raped his mind and made him promises she'd never meant to keep.
"Besides, as your instructor, I had high hopes for you," she continued. "Maybe, I still do."
"Why?"
Quistis cocked her head to the side and gave him a warm smile. "Because you have potential."
He didn't know what to make of that. Maybe Seifer had potential, but what of Street Rat? Did he have potential? The only way to find out, he supposed was to go along with her, though it made him nervous. He already knew that whomever Quistis had spoken to on the phone was not happy about having him around, and he anticipated a lot of hostility, and for good reason. What Seifer had done was wrong, and if what Quistis said was correct, he had a lot of apologizing to do.
When the train arrived, Street Rat followed Quistis to the exit, and he watched her long, slender legs beneath the peach colored skirt of her dress. He found it difficult to believe that this beauty was an ex-mercenary, and even harder to fathom that she was Lt. Commander of SeeD and one of the Fated that had taken down Ultimecia. She seemed so frail and so young to have such a history, but he knew from experience that appearances were often deceiving.
He followed her out of the station and had to smile at her delight as they discovered nearly two feet of snow covered the tiny village of Balamb. "It's never snowed here before," she said, as if she had to explain herself. "I hope they sent a car for us."
Garden had not sent a car, due to the weather, and to further complicate matters, the car rental offices were closed. "I suppose we'll just have to walk it. You don't have a weapon, though."
"Do I need one?"
"Of course," she said. "There are a lot of monsters outside of town. They're not tough, but there are enough of them out there that we'll eventually have to fight."
Quistis purchased a funny looking sword that had a revolver as a handle at the local junk shop, and she gave it to him with a smile. It was a smile full of expectance, but Street Rat didn't understand what it was that she expected.
"What the hell do I do with this?" he asked as he fingered the trigger. The blade had a certain familiarity about it, and he was sure he'd seen one before, but wasn't sure where.
"You're supposed to . . . never mind," she said, and her disappointment was evident in her eyes. "It's called a gunblade."
"Gunblade," he mumbled and he ran his finger along the edge of the blade. It was sharp enough to draw blood and he nodded his approval.
Once on the road, it wasn't long before they encountered their first monster, a bite bug. Street Rat drew the blade and lunged at the creature. Instinct took over, and he slashed the blade downward before it could attack. He depressed the trigger at the correct moment, just as the tip of the blade made contact with it's body, and the bite bug shuddered and fell to the ground.
"Nice," Quistis said as she put away her custom whip, which she called "Queenie," short for Save the Queen. "Seems you remember how to use that thing."
"It's the damnedest thing, instructor. I can't remember anything of my past, but I remember how to use this frickin' thing," he said and scratched his chin.
Quistis smiled broadly at him and shook her head.
"What?"
"You called me instructor."
The pair arrived at Garden's front gate two hours later, and both were cold, tired and hungry. Since they'd arrived, Quistis had seen a faint improvement in Seifer's memory. They were little things he remembered, but at least it was progress. In these last three days, she'd decided it would be her goal to bring Seifer back to Garden and reform him. She'd seen a side of him that she'd never dreamed existed. She wouldn't exactly say that he was kind, but he was at least humble and reserved, with only a hint of the biting sarcasm she remembered from before. She suspected that this was the real Seifer, and that the pride and sarcasm she'd seen in him before was merely a front for the person he really was. She hoped this was true, and she prayed that she wasn't making a mistake.
"Recognize it?" she asked as she stood beside the tall young man. He stood gazing up at Garden with a hint of a smile upon his face.
He nodded slowly and bit his lip.
Quistis was pleased as she lead him up the steps and pushed open the gate. What she saw there on Garden's front lawn, which was covered in snow, was nothing short of comedy. Two snow forts hand been erected on either side of the walkway, and behind each, people were busying firing snow balls at the other side. As Quistis drew closer, she noticed that behind the fort on the right was the bulk of Garden Staff. Behind the one on the left were SeeDs and Cadets. Her friends were all on the left, and they laughed and cheered each other on as each side hurled snowballs at the other.
"Take that!" Headmaster Cid cried as he tossed a snowball at Zell, which hit the boy in the chest. Cid threw his hands in the air in victory and Quistis had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. The very idea of a Garden wide snowball fight was something she found quite funny. She'd never seen Cid so carefree before, and the sight of him acting like a kid made her want to join them. If Seifer hadn't been with her, she would have. There were several people she would have loved to peg with a ball of packed ice.
"I'll get you for that," Zell called back as he retrieved a freshly made snowball from the pile. The threw it with all his strength, but it missed Cid by a mile.
"Serves you right," Cid said and thumbed his nose at Zell. "You guys should be over here, you know!"
"Never!" Zell cried and threw two more, this time at the lunch lady. "Hey! Order more hotdogs or pay the price!"
Seifer laughed out loud at this and shook his head. "Chickenwuss," he said and scooped up a handful of snow.
Quistis saw what he was about to do and stopped him, even though she recognized that Seifer remembered something else. "I would advise against that. Zell is likely to come after you," she said.
She noticed that Squall, too, was there, and he seemed to be enjoying himself as much as anyone else. A snowball smacked him upside the head, and Xu called out, "Hey Squall, shouldn't you be over here with the staff?"
"Article 44-2A: SeeD commander must at all times be prepared to stand behind his operatives. At any given time the commander may be required to take part in battle." Squall quoted and hurled a snowball at her.
It hit her in the breast, and she scowled at him. "Traitor!" she cried and flung another one his way.
Quistis took Seifer by the arm and lead him toward the melee, though she very much didn't want to ruin their fun. She didn't exactly want to stand out in the cold any longer either, so she forced herself to keep walking. The closer they got, the more eyes she noticed upon them. Fewer and fewer snowballs crossed the divide until there were none at all, and every pair of eyes were upon them. The silence was uncomfortable, and Quistis couldn't help but notice how tense Seifer had become.
"What the hell are you doing here?!" Zell said in anger. His voice shattered the quiet that had stolen over the group, and it sounded harsh against the silence . He glared at Seifer and appeared as though he was ready for a fight.
"Zell, cool it," Squall said and he approached Quistis, his expression serious. "Welcome back," he told her, and then nodded to Seifer. "You're here on good faith. Quistis has explained the situation, and as long as you behave, you may stay."
"Squall!" Zell protested.
"Quiet!" Squall commanded without looking at Zell. "Quistis. I trust your judgment. But if you're wrong . . . ."
"I'm not wrong," she insisted. Seifer stared at his feet, and Quistis gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. She knew that he was nervous, and to have them talk about him as if he wasn't even there must have been terribly uncomfortable.
"But if you are . . ."
"Squall, could we discuss this in your office later?" She asked, eager to get inside where it was warm, inside where there post full of coffee and cozy beds with soft blankets.
"Of course," Squall said. "We haven't prepared a room, but I suppose you wouldn't mind putting him up in your spare room, would you?"
Quistis shook her head and looked at him gratefully. "We won't
let you down, Squall."
Street Rat was painfully aware of the eyes on him as they passed between the two forts. He could feel their cold, angry stares, and he was certain, if any one of them possessed the power to make him spontaneously burst into flames, they would have done so. Their hatred was so intense, his ears burned, and he wanted to run as far away from this place as he could.
The thing was, the moment he'd looked up at Garden, he'd known he was home. He knew it was the only home he'd really ever known, and he knew both his past and future revolved around this place. He could feel it deep inside him. As they entered the building, Quistis held on tight to his arm. Hazy, distant memories teased at his mind. All were too brief to mean anything, but everything he saw triggered something akin to familiarity.
As he walked, he realized that the young man she'd spoken to earlier had a scar between his eyes. A scar, just like his own. He reached up and rubbed it thoughtfully. Though he could not remember how it had happened, he heard for a brief second the sound of metal striking metal, the sound of blade against blade. And then, he heard the voice of Ultimecia whisper inside his head. He shook it off and continued walking at Quistis' side.
The hallways were thankfully empty, since the majority of Garden was still on the lawn, but he noticed the few they did happen to pass also glared at him with venomous hatred. One young woman even dared to call him a bastard as they passed, and she spit at his feet in disgust.
"Shiana Zant!" Quistis cried as she let go of his arm and confronted the girl. "I insist you apologize immediately."
"Forgive me instructor, but" the girl said as she threw daggers at him with her eyes, "this man is responsible for the death of my brother. I'm afraid I can't apologize."
"You can and you will or I'll see to it that you spend the next two weeks in detention," Quistis said and she placed her hands upon her hips.
"I'll take the detention, then," the girl said indignantly. "I won't apologize."
Street Rat once again stared down at his feet. He couldn't explain the terrible guilt he felt at hearing he was to blame for killing the girl's family. How could he tell her that he'd acted against his will?
"I'll see you in my office, first thing tomorrow," Quistis told the girl, then led him to the elevator, and on up to a room where she fitted a key into the lock.
The space behind the door was large, more like a small apartment than a room, and he noted it was decorated in tasteful shades of tan and cream. There was a cream couch and love seat made of a fine, soft leather, and a natural wood coffee table with a smoky glass top with end tables and lamps to match. The place was clean and organized, save the tiny kitchen table, which was covered in file folders, books and stacks of paper. It was obvious that she did not take her meals there, rather, it was used as a desk, though he supposed she had an office somewhere in the building. He guessed that once she left her office, she came directly here to continue her work.
What kind of life was this? he wondered to himself as he pulled the door closed behind them and eyed the table again. He wondered if her work even left her time for romance or fun.
And then, he remembered something.
Something.
About a romantic dream.
Quists poured two cups of coffee and carried them to the couch, where Seifer sat staring at a photograph of them when they were children, at the orphanage. His eyes moved from one face to the next, and she swore she saw a little bit of recognition in his face as she sat down and placed one cup in front of him.
"Thank you," he murmured as he picked up the cup. His eyes did not leave the photo as he took a sip.
"Does that help any?" she asked and nodded towards the framed photograph in his hands.
"The lighthouse in the background," he said and pointed to it. "I remember something about fireworks."
Quistis laughed out loud. Of all things for him to recall! She moved to sit next to him so that she could see the photo better. "Matron caught you and Irvine setting off bottle rockets inside. You wanted to see if they'd blow the roof off."
Seifer laughed too, and shook his head. "What a brat I was," he said and he pointed to the picture again. "This one," he said. "He's your commander now?"
Quistis saw that he pointed to Squall and she nodded. Unlike the rest of the children in the photo, Squall stood apart from the group without a trace of a smile on his face. "Do you remember him?"
"Only that he cried a lot, after Matron turned the lights out," he said. "Hard to believe that little crybaby became a commander."
"That little crybaby kicked your butt on a number of occasions," she said and she let a hint of a smile play across her lips. She recalled the rivalry that had been born there at the orphanage. Seifer would pick at Squall all day long, just to start a fight. Most of the time, Squall would ignore him, but sometimes, when Seifer had gone too far, Squall would fight back. Quistis remembered the respect she'd felt at seeing that quiet little boy stand up for himself when he needed to. And, she remembered her annoyance with Seifer for being so antagonistic. This was the basis for their rivalry at Garden, though the two never realized it.
"He gave me this scar, didn't he," Seifer said and he fingered the slender, puckered scar between his eyes. It wasn't a question, but a statement.
"And you gave him his," she said. Her coffee cup was empty and she rose to refill it. "You two were enemies, so to speak," she said as she filled her cup. "The thing is, I always thought you two could have been the best of friends, if either you had ever dared to let down your guard."
There was more to it than that, but Quistis was tired and wasn't up
to explaining. Perhaps, now, the two could become friends.
That is, if Squall would let him in. Squall hadn't been happy about
her bringing Seifer back to Garden, but she refused to take NO for an answer
in this case. Most of the time, she didn't mind his veto because
he was usually right. But this time, Quistis knew Squall had let
his feelings get in the way, and she could feel in her bones that he was
wrong. Seifer was part of the orphanage gang, like it or not, and
he belonged with them.
Late that night, long after Quistis had retired, she woke to the sound of a man's voice screaming. For a moment, she was unsure of who it was, or where it was coming from, but as she sat up, she remembered Seifer was in the next room. She threw off the cover and cringed as her bare feet hit the cold floor. With a yawn, she pulled on her robe and headed to the spare room to find out what the problem was.
Seifer was still screaming as she entered the room, his face contorted in what looked like pain, and Quistis rushed to his side. She shook him to bring him out of it, but he continued to scream until his voice gave out and he could only utter small whimpers and groans. His body was slick with perspiration, and he trembled as he fought away her hands that reached out to provide comfort. Something had spooked the hell out of him.
"Get her out of my head," he said in a choked, hoarse voice. "Make her go away!"
"Make who go away?" she asked as she reached out once again to stroke his arm.
"Make her go away," he pleaded, his eyes full of fear and panic.
Quistis found it sad and pathetic to see him like this. He was like a child, really, in this state, and she couldn't help but wrap her arms around him and draw him to her breast as if he were a frightened little boy. There, he sobbed against her nightgown as she tried her best to soothe him with soft words.
A boxer shorts clad Squall burst in, his face full of alarm. A sleepy eyed Rinoa stood behind him. "Quistis, what's going on in here? I heard screaming."
"Everything's fine," she said quietly and nodded towards the living room, "I'll be out in a minute."
Quistis had forgotten that this spare room of hers was right next to Squall and Rinoa's bedroom and that the walls were painfully thin. She remembered that when she'd first moved in, she'd initially chosen this particular room for her own, only to discover that she could hear everything through the walls. After three nights of listening to bedsprings creak as she tried to fall asleep, Quistis decided it best to switch rooms. It was too much of a reminder of what everyone else was doing that she was not.
"It was only a bad dream," she whispered to Seifer after Squall had closed the door.
Seifer shuddered and pulled her into his lap. "Just make it stop. Please."
Quistis didn't know what he meant, but she bent her head down and rested her forehead against the top of his head. Her long golden hair spilled down across his shoulders and back, and she felt him tremble as it touched his bare skin. She didn't know what else to say to him that might bring him comfort, so she merely sat there in his lap with her arms around him and his around her.
She felt like crying, too, though she had no reason to do so. Whatever he'd been through had stolen away the pride he'd once possessed, had stripped him bare and left him a tortured shell of a man. It broke her heart to think he'd once been so confident, so sure of himself, and she hoped that he'd soon find his stride again. She missed certain little things she thought she'd never miss about him, and his cocky confidence was one of them.
When his breathing had slowed, and he no longer shook in her arms, she covered him with the blanket. "Go back to sleep," she said gently.
He shook his head and stared back at her with tormented eyes.
"I'll be back to check on you in a while," she told him and she left the room to speak with Squall.
Squall sat on the couch beside Rinoa, who looked as if she would much rather be in bed. "Sorry he woke you," Quistis said as she took a seat. "It was just a nightmare."
"Some nightmare," Squall said. "It sounded like he was being murdered."
Quistis could only nod. "Once, again, I apologize."
Squall sighed and looked at Quistis with his crystal blue eyes. "Quistis, why are you doing this?"
Quistis lifted her chin and returned his stare. "Because I have a heart," she said. "I couldn't just leave him there."
"I would have," Rinoa said. Her face was hard, and Quistis understood why. Seifer had mercilessly thrown her at Adel's feet in the Lunatic Pandora two years ago, and Quistis knew it would be a long time before Rinoa could even begin to forgive him.
Quistis sighed and rubbed her eyes. "I know you don't understand," she said. "But whatever he went through, it was bad, and I don't think his actions were entirely his own. From everything he's told me, Ultimecia controlled his every move, his every thought and every word he said. Ultimecia was the only thing he remembered when I found him. He didn't know me, or any of you. He couldn't remember anything but her."
Rinoa's expression did not thaw. "It's not my problem." Quistis thought she sounded exactly Squall, and she wondered if she'd done it on purpose, or if it was that she'd spent so much time with him, she'd started to pick up some of his habits.
"Think back, Rinoa," Quistis said. "What was it like for you when she controlled your mind?"
Rinoa blanched and she looked away.
"That's what I thought," Quistis said. "Now, multiply that feeling
by a thousand. That's what he had to deal with, so don't be too harsh
when you judge him, Rinoa. You, of all people, should understand
the most."
After Quistis sent Squall and Rinoa on their way, she poked her head into Seifer's room to see if he'd fallen asleep yet. She was dismayed to see that he had not, and she made her way to his bedside. "You need anything?" she asked as she knelt beside the bed and took his hand.
"No thanks," he replied.
She gave his hand a squeeze of reassurance. "If you don't need anything, I'm going back to sleep," she whispered and got to her feet.
"Quistis," he said and he propped himself up on one arm. "Stay with me."
She was uncertain as to what he was asking of her and she could only stare back at his vulnerable eyes.
"Please," he said. "I don't want to be alone tonight."
She nodded and took a seat across the room in an arm chair, though she knew she wouldn't get any sleep there. As exhausted as she was, she was nevertheless willing to stay if he needed her to.
"Not there," he said. He patted the empty space beside him and said, "Here."
For a second, she hesitated. Was this a come-on or did he just need the comfort of her arms around him while he slept? What would Squall think if he found her there in bed with Seifer? And Rinoa, she'd tell absolutely everyone.
But then, Quistis realized she didn't care what they said or thought. She would be much warmer and much more comfortable in the bed and she knew it. She might even be able to catch a few hours of sleep if she was lucky.
As she slipped into the bed beside him, she wondered what it would be like to have someone beside her every night, like all of her friends did. They were all so fortunate to have found someone to share their lives with, while Quistis had only herself. She couldn't deny that she found the idea of laying next to Seifer a comfort, it was just too bad it was only for the night, and too bad it was Seifer, and not someone who loved her.
His arm slid around her narrow waist and pulled her close. She could feel his breath against her neck as she closed her eyes, and she felt something stir inside her, a faint fluttering in the pit of her stomach. She didn't understand what it meant, or even what it was, and that was disconcerting. Quistis had built her life upon remaining in control of her emotions, and she found it disturbing that lying close to him caused such an upset in the carefully constructed fortress she called self-control.
Quistis realized then, as he nuzzled her hair, that if she were to ever find love, she would be required to let down her guard, or else she'd never be loved. The very idea of that made her afraid. What if she did let her guard down, only to be cruelly hurt? She finally understood what Squall had gone through when Rinoa came into his life. Squall had been lucky, she thought. Lucky that Rinoa had never given up on him. Quistis wasn't a stranger to dating, but all the men she'd gone out with had given up on her after a date or two.
Would she end up spending the rest of her life alone and unloved? Hyne, she hoped not. She didn't want to believe that was her destiny, to die an old maid.
Still, she couldn't help the excitement that coursed through her just to have a man's body next to hers. Something about that electrified her senses and made her cheeks flush with heat. She wanted him in the worst way. She wanted to feel his lips and hands on her, but she didn't dare make a move in that direction.
A handful of times in the past, she'd gone to bed with a random man she'd met at a bar, and each time she'd done it, she'd felt lousy about giving away what should only be given in love. But she was hungry for love, hungry for someone to look at her the way Squall looked at Rinoa. She wanted someone who looked at her the way Irvine looked at Selphie, not a meaningless roll in the hay with someone just because it was convenient.
This forced her to question what she wanted from Seifer. Did she
want him because he was there? Or was it that she saw a desperate
need for love in his eyes too?
Seifer, who could no longer think of himself as Street Rat, was grateful for Quistis' presence beside him. The warmth of her body next to his took his mind off the nightmare, and he hoped having her there would ward off more dreams. This last one was the worst yet, and he was reluctant to fall asleep again, just in case it came back.
So much had happened today. He'd remembered so many things, more than he dared tell Quistis, and he decided that it was important that he make it up to everyone somehow. They'd been kind enough to take him in again, and though there was hostility from most, he hoped he could change that. And as for Quistis, he wanted to do something special for her, since she'd cared enough to be there for him when he was at his most vulnerable. He didn't know what yet, but he'd think of something.
Despite the dream, he was feeling more confident in himself, less broken and more human. Pride was something he'd have to wait on, he supposed, but at least he didn't feel like he belonged in the gutter any more. He still felt quite uneasy being in Garden, but that too would take time. But he didn't want to go back to being the insidious bastard he'd been before. All he wanted was to be normal, to have friends, and Hyne willing, a family somewhere in his future.
As he lay there with his face buried in her neck, he remembered how he used to imagine her naked as she stood at the front of the classroom lecturing about the rules of engagement. He smiled at this. He'd had such a crush on her then, though he never dared show it. Besides, if he had, nothing would have come of it. She'd always been against breaking the rules, and screwing around with students was a big no-no at Garden. Even now, he couldn't help but be attracted to her, but he didn't dare hope that she was to him as well. There was a reason she was referred to as the 'Ice Queen' by many at Garden.
Beside him, Quistis sighed, as if she were doing some heavy thinking herself, and he propped his head up on his hand and looked down at her in the darkness. "Can't sleep?"
"I was just thinking, that's all," she said and she stared up at the ceiling.
"Me too," he said and he reached out to brush a few strands of hair from her face so that he could see her lovely eyes. His thumb grazed her bottom lip by accident as he did so, and caused her to jump a little at the sensation. He wondered what it would be like to feel her lips on his, then he scolded himself for thinking that she'd even be interested.
In her eyes, he saw confusion and frustration, as if she were fighting a battle inside her mind. "What are you thinking about?" he asked.
"My life," she replied, and she turned her eyes to him, and her expression he could not read.
"Feel like discussing it?"
"No," she said and sighed again.
"Hey," he said and he traced her jawline with his finger tips. She trembled and closed her eyes. "Talk to me. I won't bite."
Quistis brushed his hand away and looked at him once more. "Please don't do that," she said, and she sat up against the headboard.
"Quisty, tell me what's on your mind."
She smiled a bit at his use of her childhood nickname and she began to talk. "I was just thinking about how all I do is work, and about how all my friends have paired up. Everyone is either married or about to get married, and I'm still alone. It's depressing to think that they're all going to be starting families soon, and I'm not even dating anyone."
Seifer sat up and leaned against the headboard beside her. "You'll meet someone eventually," he said.
Quistis shook her head and tears sprang to her eyes. "I don't think so. There's something about me men find repulsive. I don't think anyone will ever love me," and with that she began to sob into her hands.
"Come here," Seifer said as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his lap for the second time in less than three hours. She leaned her head against his chest and sobbed. Seifer hadn't considered that the frailty he sensed was due to a lack of love, and he was baffled, especially when she deserved it more than anyone. "Quistis, any man lucky enough to be with you would be a fool not to see what you have to offer, so don't you dare think you're repulsive or unworthy. You hear me? Don't even think it."
His words made her cry harder and he realized he'd probably just made the situation worse. He felt like an idiot for opening his mouth, but he couldn't deny that he was already half in love with her, and he'd been about to tell her so but the words wouldn't come out. Instead, he merely kissed the top of her head and stroked her back lightly with his fingertips. "Quistis, please don't cry," he whispered and he rocked her gently in his arms.
"I'm sorry," she said as she looked up at him. "It's just that . . . that's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me."
Despite himself, he laughed and hugged her. "You know, you forgot about the Trepies," he remarked. "They adore you."
"The Trepies all became Squallies," Quistis told him and she laughed through her tears.
Seifer groaned. "Hyne help us!" he cried and chuckled. Then he became serious and ducked his head so that he could see her face. "Quistis, don't sell yourself short. You are beautiful, and you are worth caring about. You just haven't found the right guy yet."
"Tell me, where do I start looking?" she asked softly.
Seifer suddenly knew what he could do for Quistis Trepe to repay her kindness. He could give her the one thing she wanted most. That was, if she'd have him. "Maybe you've already found him," he replied.
Then, he cupped her face with both hands and kissed her with the kind of roughness brought on only by passion. He heard her soft cry of surprise, and she responded in kind, with the same intensity.
It was only when his lips found her neck that she protested and pushed him away. "Seifer," she said sadly as she climbed from the bed. "I'm sorry. I can't."
"Please don't leave," he said.
"I have to before I do something I'll regret," she said as she turned for the door. "I like you too much to risk it."
"If you want me too, why leave?" he asked. He could tell she wasn't leaving because she didn't want to be with him, but out of fear, and he didn't understand why she'd be afraid.
"Because you don't love me," she said to the door.
"What if I do?" he asked.
She hesitated and looked back at him. "I promised myself a while back that never again would I sleep with someone I don't love, Seifer. As much as I may want you right now, I don't love you."
You will, Seifer thought to himself. One day soon, Quistis
Trepe you will love me.
**Notes**
You said you wanted more, so I delivered. Hope you like this chapter. It took me a long time to write it because I wasn't sure where I was going with it. I've been sick most of the week with strep throat, so I'm posting a little later than I would have liked. I know that this chapter is really long....and I tried to figure a way where I could break it up a bit, but nothing worked, so you get the whole thing. And this story does have a definite direction, the problem will be finding the time to do it with two other active fics here.
If you didn't read the notes at the bottom of the first chapter, this is a Prequel of sorts to another ongoing story here, which is nearly finished, called "the Devil's Playground." I would love for you to read it, as I've worked very hard on it, but be warned. It is a VERY different story than this one, though the two will eventually coincide as far as events go.
I realize that Seifer is OOC, and had he been his normal self, this scene would have been much different. You will see a bit of the old Seifer in upcoming chapters, for those of you who love his sarcastic nature, so don't worry. Oh, and the rating may change due to a possible lemony fresh scene somewhere in the future.......
So please...review, flame, spam....whatever.