In
Alaska not too far away…
Jack and Irina had safely arrived in Alaska by Laundromatmobile although
it had not been an entirely problem-free trip. It had been a difficult ride, to
say the least, since their faces were inches apart for the duration of the
flight. It had been hard for them to avoid pressing their bodies even closer as
there had been a lot of turbulence in the air caused by an unexpected large
gaggle of geese. On occasion you could even say that they were enjoying themselves
entirely too much and behaving like two sporks in a pod.
Once they arrived they decided that buying a luxury RV camper would be a
good way to lay low for a while and avoid Irina being captured by the CIA. Jack
knew he could get into big trouble for what he was doing but it didn't matter
to him any more. He had Irina and that was all that mattered although if you
had asked him I doubt he would have directly admitted it, as of yet anyway.
While exploring their options for the RV, Irina happened to glance over
her shoulder and see Sydney and Vaughn climbing into their own RV. She
immediately turned to Jack and said, "Darling, I need you to do something for
me." He looked at her curiously as she continued.
"I need you to slowly turn around and not overreact when you realize what
you are looking at."
Jack, now with curiosity threatening to kill the cat, turned just in the
nick of time to see Vaughn leaning very close to Sydney as if whispering sweet
nothing's in her ear. Jack nearly froze from shock but managed to turn back
around to Irina.
"What are they doing here?" He asked her in a hasty whisper. "How did they
know we would be here looking at RV's?"
"Jack, your guess is as good as mine, dear. Perhaps we should go talk to
them and see what is going on. You know they must be here for a reason, most
likely having nothing to do with me escaping." Jack seriously doubted Irina's
logic on this but had quickly learned that she was right most of the time. They
walked as nonchalantly as possible over to the RV that Syd and Vaughn were
entering.
"Ahem." Jack coughed. "Sydney Anne Bristow, what are you doing here and
why are you doing it with him?" A shocked and stunned Sydney and Vaughn both
turned to see Jack and Irina standing before them.
"Uh. Dad… Mom… We, uh, we… Wait a second, what are YOU doing here?
Kendall said that you flew away on a washing machine. He called you a fairy.
And mom, I thought you escaped?" Sydney raised her eyebrow at Jack and
Irina while Vaughn stood beside her, nodding.
"Don't change the subject, young lady… Kendall did what? Why that
little shiny bowling ball bald headed… Agent Vaughn, get your hands off my
daughter!" Jack glowered at Vaughn. Vaughn ducked behind Sydney but didn't
remove his hands from Sydney's waist.
Irina put a hand on Jack's arm and said, "Calm down, dear. Sydney, I
have escaped, obviously. I am simply being escaped with your father. Now, would
you kindly explain to us what is going on here?"
Vaughn
popped out again from behind Sydney and said, "Well, after you escaped, we
found out what happened with the coffee maker!"
Jack frowned, "Uh, yes, what does the coffee machine have to do with
why you are here?"
"It's simple, really: we found out that Sloane unplugged it."
"So? How did you know Irina was here?"
"So? Don't you get it? Sloane unplugged the coffee maker!"
"So? Wait, why wasn't Sloane arrested?"
"For unplugging the coffee maker? It's not a felony, it's just
rude." Vaughn had a very confused look on his face.
"No, no, Agent Vaughn. Sloane is a wanted criminal. If he had been
inside the Joint Task Force, wouldn't somebody have arrested him? Is the whole
world incompetent?" Jack waved his arms around to make his point.
Irina and Sydney watched in amusement as Vaughn tried explaining further,
"Oh. Yeah. I mean, he didn't unplug it from the INSIDE, he unplugged it
from the outside."
"How did he do that?"
"He hacked into the servers and messed up the wiring. That caused the
coffee maker to become unplugged."
"How did he do that?"
"I don't know, stop asking. I only know what I know. But, I mean, can
you imagine what would happen if Sloane hacked into the White House and
unplugged the TV?"
"Why would he do that?"
"Because!" Vaughn stomped his foot. "Chaos would ensue!!! I
mean, meese could take over! Our nation would… you know what? Stop asking me. I
don't know." Sydney patted him on the arm and gave him a comforting smile.
"Fine, then." Jack huffed. "Why are you here?" Vaughn
gave Jack a look, to which Jack raised his eyebrow. Vaughn sighed heavily.
"We came here in search of Irina after Kendall told us that she'd
escaped." Irina frowned.
"What made you look here?"
"It just made sense," Sydney said dramatically, once again looking deep
into Vaughn's eyes. Vaughn began to lean closer, and they each shut their eyes…
until Jack stepped between them. Vaughn's eyes snapped open, and he jumped
away. Jack looked about ready to kill him with just a handful of snow and a
blue pixie stick, until Irina stepped forward.
"We need to do something about this," she stated. Jack nodded vigorously.
"Yes, we do! So here's the plan: Agent Vaughn, if you so much as look at
my daughter one more time during this mission, I will rip your heart out, impale
you upon the antlers of some meese, and…" Sydney interrupted.
"Wait- do meese- I mean, moose- have antlers?" Vaughn stared at her.
"Syd, that's completely irrelevant!"
"That is not what I was talking about Jack Bristow, and you know it!"
Irina stated. Jack gave her a confused, wounded look.
"I meant, we need to do something about Sloane." Everyone fell silent for
a moment.
"You mean, like find him and Sark and take them into custody and put a
stop to their evil plottings?" Sydney asked. Irina nodded.
"Yes, in a nutshell."
"Ok.
So, let's do that. We can start… hmm… here!" Sydney suggested.
"Here? Who would come here?" Vaughn asked. Irina, Jack, and Sydney all
stared at him.
"Oh… right. We would. Ok, so here it is." They all looked around.
"I don't see them," Vaughn noted a moment later. Jack glared at him.
"Let's go. We can look for them elsewhere." They all started walking away
from the RV's.
"Hey! You rented those, you have to pay!" A little man came chasing after
them.
"But we're not using them," Sydney pointed out.
"So? They're rented to you. You have to pay for them."
Irina frowned and reached for her gun. Sydney stopped her quickly.
"Mom! You can't do that!" Irina pouted.
"Fine." She slowly put the gun away and leaned down. A moment later, she
came up with a handful of snow, which she launched at the owner of the RV's. It
hit him square in the face, knocking him out cold. Irina grinned triumphantly
and led the way out.
