Ch.6 up and running! Hurah for
me! Sorry for the long time between chapters. I've been very busy lately.
^grabs her computer and throws it out her window^ STUPID PIECE OF-- (the
following sentence had been censored for your protection). And I have exams
too. Yay
for me. Excuse me while I go do my dance of joy. Oh yeah, there is a lot
of sexual innuendo and junk like that in this chapter. Just thought I'd warn
you. On with the fic!
"You've got to be kidding me." Ratchet stared at Optimus.
"No I'm quite serious." Optimus said.
"Don't you think you're…"
"I'm what?"
"Pushing it a little?" Ratchet offered.
"No way! This is war man. War." Optimus stressed.
Ratchet snorted. "Yeah, whatever."
"You have to do it!"
"I already did it once! You're pushing your luck."
"Well, wasn't the first time funny? Look at all the money
you made!"
"Good point…but still no."
"Aghhhhh fine, be that way!"
Optimus roared and stalked out of the Magnus' office.
Ratchet shook his head. "Honestly, these three never stop!"
he said, looking down and the prone Magnus lying on the floor. He gave him an
experimental kick in the head. Magnus sparked a bit, but didn't move. Ratchet
sighed, and walked over to Magnus' desk. He pressed the Blurr
button on the intercom and waited for a response.
"ThisisBlurrwhatdoyouneed?" came his speedy reply.
"Errr this is Ratchet. Could you
bring down a cart or something? I need to get Magnus to the medical bay."
There was a short pause and something that sounded
suspiciously like a choked scream. "YeahsureI'llberightdown."
He answered. There was a click as the intercom shut off.
Ratchet checked his internal clock.
"Whoops, it's almost time. Better
get a move on." He muttered to himself. Stealing Magnus' stapler, he hurried
out of the office giggling. "I love staplers!"
~~~A Random Room~~~
Ratchet hurried to the Random Room. Several dozen bots were
scattered outside the room, talking idly and carrying popcorn.
"Your late!" somebody yelled.
"Aloha, sorry 'bout that. Had some Magnus
trouble." He said. Someone sniggered.
"Well hurry up!"
"Yeah yeah I'm going." He mumbled
and stepped up to the door and unlocked it. "Hand me your tickets as you walk
in. No ticket equals no admission." He said. One by
one the bots filed into the room, each of them handing Ratchet a ticket before
walking in. When everyone was inside, Ratchet went in and locked the door
behind him.
"Ok ladies and gentlemen--"
"Ladies? Where?!" quite a few bots yelled and looked frantically
around the room.
"Errr sorry, my
bad. Didn't sell any
tickets to women." Ratchet said apologetically.
"Why not?"
"Dunno. They said something about
a party at Blurr's place and some Fritos."
Everyone was silent.
Ratchet cleared his throat. "One can only imagine what
they're doing."
"Just get on with it!"
"Alright, I'm going." He said and walked over to a large
screen TV against the wall. He picked up the remote and pressed a few buttons.
The TV turned on but the picture was all fuzzy. Ratchet frowned at it and gave
it a good solid kick. It sparked, then the picture
cleared, showing someone walking down a hallway from a very low height.
"Is that Rodimus?" someone called out.
"Yeah, that's him. I put a hidden camera on him when
Optimus opened a can-o-whoop-ass and sent him to the medical bay."
Jazz nudged Blaster who was standing next to him. "Three
guesses where Ratchet put that camera." He whispered.
Blaster eyed the screen. "Well from the looks of it, he put
it… oh." He trailed off, staring at the TV in wide eyed astonishment.
Jazz sniggered. "Makes you wonder what Ratchet does in his
free time. Rodimus seems to show up at medical bay quite often."
"Just what are you insinuating?" Blaster asked.
He snorted. "Ratchet is gay. Just like Rodimus! Don't tell
me you haven't noticed!" Jazz said incredibly. Blaster shifted around
nervously. Jazz looked at him closely, then backed
away. "Your gay too!" he exclaimed.
Blaster glared. "So? What's wrong with that?! It's not like
I'm not allowed to be gay."
"Yeah, but then why the hell are there female Transformers?
Aren't they there for the sex?"
Blaster shook his head. "In case you haven't noticed,
nobody here has ever had sex with a fem before. Fems
don't have sex with us guys. Have you ever heard anyone talking about havin' sex with a fem?" he pointed out.
Jazz paused and thought about it. "Now
that you mention, no."
"See?"
"Yeah, but I've heard fems
talking about how 'great it was last night' and junk like that. Who were they
talking about?"
Blaster stared at him. Jazz stared back. Blaster raised his
eye ridges. Jazz's eyes widened. "You mean…that they…just
them…females…together?"
Blaster nodded.
"I think I'm going to be sick."
"Why?"
"I just had this thought about Moonracer
and Arcee. Excuse me a moment." Jazz said, and raced
away.
Blaster sighed. "Honestly, you'd think he was created
yesterday!"
"EVERYONE QUIET!" Ratchet yelled and the room fell silent. All eyes focused
on the TV.
~~~The Bar~~~
Rodimus opened the door to the bar room, and stepped
inside. It was full of drunken bots and the place reeked of high grade energon. Discreetly, all the patrons looked up at him, and
whispered when he walked past and took a seat at the bar.
"Is that him?"
"Yeah. He's the guy after Magnus."
"He's gay then?"
"Yup."
"Hehehe. Twenty dollars says you can't get that gay group in the
corner over there to hook up with him."
"You're on!"
After a heated discussion with the gay group in the corner
and the exchanging of money, a plan was formed. MUAHAHAHAHA!
Rodimus looked over as a bot sat
down next to him at the bar. It was Bumblebee. He watched as Bumblebee looked
very openly up and down his form and grinned at Rodimus. Rodimus hurredly turned away. Oh my god, I think Bumblebee
is hitting on me he thought frantically.
"Wow Rodimus, did you get a new paintjob? You look very
sleek…" Bumblebee purred.
Rodimus looked at him in shock. "Excuse me?"
"You look very sexy, if you catch my drift." He said,
looking slyly at him.
"Errr thanks…I think." He said
and turned away, only to come face to face with another bot
who he didn't even know.
"Hey there Rodimus. I heard you used to be called Hot Rod." He said, looking
sidelong at him.
Rodimus stared at him wearily. "Yeah,
so?"
The strange bot smiled at him. "I
was wondering if that name had any reality to it."
"What do you—" Rodimus started,
but stopped as he watched the stranger's optics look down. Down
where he really didn't want people looking.
"Excuse me, I have to go." He declared, and practically ran
away from the bar and into the bathroom. As soon as he entered, every guy
looked up from what they were doing and stared at him. He pointedly ignored
them and walked over to a stall. He pushed open a door and was about to walk
inside when he noticed that there was someone already in there.
"Oh I'm sorry! I didn't think anyone was in here! My bad!"
he said quickly and was about to back out when the bot
grabbed his arm. The bot looked suspiciously like Kup, but he probably was just seeing things.
"Need some help?" he said suggestively, his thumb rubbing
Rodimus' arm. Rodimus looked at him in alarm.
"No, no I'm fine. I'll just be going now." He said and
threw himself out of the stall. He tripped over his feet and crashed to the
floor.
"…ow." He muttered, then stared around
suspiciously as the bots in the bathroom surrounded him and started to talk
amongst themselves.
"Looks like he could use some help."
"He could use some help with a lot of things."
"Looks like he's bored. Maybe we should show him a good time."
"Yeah that's a great idea. Let's take him to my place."
"Cool, lets all go! I'm sure Rodimus would be glad to have
our… help."
The bots giggled and heaved Rodimus to his feet. He pulled
back and tried to get away.
"No thanks, really! I'm fine!" he said frantically.
"Nonsense! You're coming with us. Tie him up boys,
we've got a live one!" The group cheered and tied Rodimus up with ropes that
they pulled out of Primus knows where. They lifted him up and carried him out
the back door of the bathroom.
"NO NO I DON'T WANNA GO!" he
screamed. The group just grinned wickedly at each other.
"Oh boy, we're gonna have some fun
tonight!"
