This story is a sequel to Yuki and the Beast. Please read that first so
this will make more sense (not that it makes any even if you read it
after). I co-authored it with Vesha; go look at her stuff too. I command
you. Happy reading.
* * *
Sleeping Yuki
Once again, everyone's favourite white-haired teen was in Hong Kong with his beloved husband, Toya. Sakura had come along too, and Toya had tricked her into taking her shoes off on the airplane again.
That evening at dinner, Toya was wearing his best tuxedo and Yuki with his favourite tutu.
'Oh, this is simply WONDERFUL!' Yuki said with delight, drooling over the menu. Sakura sniffed.
'I can't believe I fell for that again!' she said. Yuki laughed a hearty-beef laugh and then started to sing-laugh. 'Doo doo doo doo! Ah ha ha ha ha!' he got up and expected everyone to join in like they do in the movies, but they just stared at him oddly. Abu pushed him back into the chair, straightening his tie.
'I don't want you messing this up for me.' He said, then taking a chance to wink at one of the dead fish on the other table.
So, the waiter came and Yuki ordered fifty-million-ZILLION of everything on the list!
'Will that be all?' the waiter asked in a fake French accent.
Yuki laughed and slapped the man on the back. 'For now, garkon!'
Suddenly!! Sakura picked up a piece of chicken, and then decided that she didn't want it and put it back.
'Hey! You can't do that!!' Toya whined. 'Its got your cooties now!!'
Sakura stuck her tongue out at him.
'Nooo!! Now the air has your cooties!!' Toya screamed and tried to stop breathing, but he just fainted.
'Easy come, easy go Toya!' Yuki said stupidly.
'You are so cute Sakura!' Tomoyo said, but everyone ignored her like they usually do.
Yuki brought out his pocket-powder and started to slap it onto his face to hide the hives from when he had eaten Belgian Waffles in the morning. The waiter came over and tapped him on the shoulder.
'I am sorry sir-'
'Sir?!' Yuki screamed, offended.
'Sorry, ma'am, I just assumed that since you looked like a wall, that you were a man. I was going to say, that this isn't a powder room.'
Yuki stared at the man. 'What isn't?'
'This room.'
'This room isn't what?'
'A powder room, ma'am.' The waiter was starting to get very annoyed.
'Why not?'
'Because it is a restaurant.'
'What is?'
'THIS IS THE RESTAURANT ROOM AND IF YOU WANT TO PUT POWDER ON YOUR UGLY FACE YOU HAVE TO GO INTO THE BATHROOM!!!!!!' the waiter yelled and turned red and walked away to serve the young boy at the bar.'
'Well, I never!' Yuki said, stuffing food into his face. As Yuki was pigging out, the waiter went over to take the boy's order.
'I want you to get that white haired boy over there some of your cheapest scotch. I saw this in a movie once. And give him my bill.' Yamazaki said.
'He said that he was a girl.'
'Debatable. Now do as I say!' Yamazaki said, and pulled on his black cloak so that he would look mysterious.
The waiter sighed and poured a small glass of the cheapest scotch he had, and it was called Josh Brew. He brought it over to Yuki who momentarily stopped the steady flow of food to his mouth to drink it without even asking who sent it. The waiter cleared his throat.
'Sir, or ma'am, or whoever you are, the little boy over there sent this drink for you. He says that you will pay for his dinner too.' He said, and pointed at Yamazaki who was sitting on the stool, eating peanuts from the bar, his legs swinging back and forth because he was too short to touch the ground. He waved his hanky at Yuki.
'Yoohooo!!' he called. Yuki didn't even look over. He just drank the scotch and then his face turned purple. He then preceded to faint just as Toya was coming to.
'Yo, guys, what's up?' he asked, and then saw Yuki. 'Oh, boy.'
Someone called the ambulance and rushed Yuki to the hospital. In an hour, the doctor came out of the room to a worried and anxious Toya, a peeved Sakura, an ignored Tomoyo, and a cloaked Yamazaki.
'What is the news doctor?' Toya asked.
'I am afraid that Mister Tsukishiro is in a coma.' He said. 'And Yamazaki is breaking up with Chiharu to be with Alex, who also loves Xellos.' He told them all.
Toya gasped and everyone turned around to look at Yamazaki who had shifty eyes.
'They warned me this would happen if this turned into a soap-opera!!' he yelled and ran away crying.
Toya went into Yuki's hospital room to talk to him. He sat down on one of the hospital chairs and started to blink really fast.
'Well, Yuki. it seems you're in a coma. I don't know if you can hear me.'
'I can.' Yuki said, but Toya thought it was in his head.
'I don't know how I can go back to Tomoeda now, with you in a coma, and Yamazaki with his personal life being revealed.'
'I'm fine.' Yuki rasped.
'Oh, I can just hear your sweet voice now. I have to leave this room Yuki, good bye.' Toya said, and ran awee crying.
'Hee?' (Pronounced héé?) Yuki asked, but no one heard him. Maybe because he was now... A HUMAN VEGETABLE!! BWA HA HA!!
Since this is Easy Come, Easy Go World, instead of just crowing in the morning, the Rooster sings "Easy Come, Easy Go!" and it is the ONLY song that the radio stations ever play.
The next morning, after the Easy Come, Easy Go rush was over, Yamazaki came by with a shot of scotch for Yuki.
'Hey buddy.' Yamazaki said. 'I smuggled this in for you!'
Yuki looked up. 'No! Scotch bring pain!' he said. Yamazaki screamed in horror and took one of Yuki's pillows and suffocated him until he really WAS in a coma, like Barney did on The Simpsons. Then he jumped out of the window and ran away.
Later on, Fujitaka came by with some food that he cooked. Because he cooks food.
'Hey, Yuki, I know you are a human vegetable now, but I brought you some food anyway. It is petrified health food!' he said and danced around until he collapsed and had to be dragged out by the nurses, who were actually Toya and Yamazaki dressed in nun-costumes for some reason.
'Lets get him outta here.' Toya said to Yamazaki, suspiciously. Yamazaki nodded and they put Yuki in a duffle bag and ran out of the hospital. They then brought him to one of those hippie-natural remedy people who tried to bring him back to consciousness by putting rose- petals on his eyes and doing the rain dance. When that didn't work and they asked her to try something else, she said that her chi was low, and that she needed to recuperate.
'I know another place we can bring him.' Yamazaki said and they set off to the other place, which was even stranger than the last.
'Wait here.' Yamazaki said, and ran into the back room. Then he came out again, wearing pink and purple robes with big gaudy fake-pearls around his neck.
'Welcome children, to the house of Madam Yamazaki Shabooboo!' he said, and then he fell to the ground, going into a psychic trance thing. Then he got up. 'What is it you need help with? Oh, wait, the spirits are telling me! You need. to bring your friend in the bag there out of a coma!'
Toya stared. 'H-how did you know?' he asked stupidly.
'I know many things, but what the spirits won't tell me is your credit- card number!' he said in a strange voice. Toya handed him his credit card, health card, bankcard, AND library card!
'There ya go!' he said.
'Very well.' Yamazaki sat down on the floor and started to sing Easy Come, Easy Go to himself. Then he ate his clogs in anger.
'This one is heavily intoxicated! We will have to have a séance!!' Yamazaki said and they all sat in a circle and started to hum Easy Come, Easy Go to themselves.
'Ohhhh, great spirits of the wild blue yonnderrrr!' Yamazaki chanted. 'Pleaaaase get me a burger and frieeesss!!!'
SUDDENLY! A burger and fries appeared on Yuki's face and he ate it hungrily.
'YUKI!! YOU'RE CURED!!' Toya yelled happily.
'I suppose I was just really hungry!' Yuki said, and they all laughed, laughed, laughed the night away.
The next day, they were on the plane home.
'I'm sorry I ruined our honeymoon, Toya.' Yuki said sadly.
Toya smiled. 'That's okay, Yuki, we can always have fun in "My Big Fat Anime Life!" as a television series!'
'We sure can, Toya. We sure can!' Yuki said ate some Belgian Waffles in triumph.
Then, the fight attendants came out and started to sing Easy Come, Easy Go, and soon the whole plane had joined in.
"Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah! Doo doo doo doo doo! EASY COME, EASY GO!"
FIN.
.Little did they know that Kaho was on the wing of the plane.
* * *
Sleeping Yuki
Once again, everyone's favourite white-haired teen was in Hong Kong with his beloved husband, Toya. Sakura had come along too, and Toya had tricked her into taking her shoes off on the airplane again.
That evening at dinner, Toya was wearing his best tuxedo and Yuki with his favourite tutu.
'Oh, this is simply WONDERFUL!' Yuki said with delight, drooling over the menu. Sakura sniffed.
'I can't believe I fell for that again!' she said. Yuki laughed a hearty-beef laugh and then started to sing-laugh. 'Doo doo doo doo! Ah ha ha ha ha!' he got up and expected everyone to join in like they do in the movies, but they just stared at him oddly. Abu pushed him back into the chair, straightening his tie.
'I don't want you messing this up for me.' He said, then taking a chance to wink at one of the dead fish on the other table.
So, the waiter came and Yuki ordered fifty-million-ZILLION of everything on the list!
'Will that be all?' the waiter asked in a fake French accent.
Yuki laughed and slapped the man on the back. 'For now, garkon!'
Suddenly!! Sakura picked up a piece of chicken, and then decided that she didn't want it and put it back.
'Hey! You can't do that!!' Toya whined. 'Its got your cooties now!!'
Sakura stuck her tongue out at him.
'Nooo!! Now the air has your cooties!!' Toya screamed and tried to stop breathing, but he just fainted.
'Easy come, easy go Toya!' Yuki said stupidly.
'You are so cute Sakura!' Tomoyo said, but everyone ignored her like they usually do.
Yuki brought out his pocket-powder and started to slap it onto his face to hide the hives from when he had eaten Belgian Waffles in the morning. The waiter came over and tapped him on the shoulder.
'I am sorry sir-'
'Sir?!' Yuki screamed, offended.
'Sorry, ma'am, I just assumed that since you looked like a wall, that you were a man. I was going to say, that this isn't a powder room.'
Yuki stared at the man. 'What isn't?'
'This room.'
'This room isn't what?'
'A powder room, ma'am.' The waiter was starting to get very annoyed.
'Why not?'
'Because it is a restaurant.'
'What is?'
'THIS IS THE RESTAURANT ROOM AND IF YOU WANT TO PUT POWDER ON YOUR UGLY FACE YOU HAVE TO GO INTO THE BATHROOM!!!!!!' the waiter yelled and turned red and walked away to serve the young boy at the bar.'
'Well, I never!' Yuki said, stuffing food into his face. As Yuki was pigging out, the waiter went over to take the boy's order.
'I want you to get that white haired boy over there some of your cheapest scotch. I saw this in a movie once. And give him my bill.' Yamazaki said.
'He said that he was a girl.'
'Debatable. Now do as I say!' Yamazaki said, and pulled on his black cloak so that he would look mysterious.
The waiter sighed and poured a small glass of the cheapest scotch he had, and it was called Josh Brew. He brought it over to Yuki who momentarily stopped the steady flow of food to his mouth to drink it without even asking who sent it. The waiter cleared his throat.
'Sir, or ma'am, or whoever you are, the little boy over there sent this drink for you. He says that you will pay for his dinner too.' He said, and pointed at Yamazaki who was sitting on the stool, eating peanuts from the bar, his legs swinging back and forth because he was too short to touch the ground. He waved his hanky at Yuki.
'Yoohooo!!' he called. Yuki didn't even look over. He just drank the scotch and then his face turned purple. He then preceded to faint just as Toya was coming to.
'Yo, guys, what's up?' he asked, and then saw Yuki. 'Oh, boy.'
Someone called the ambulance and rushed Yuki to the hospital. In an hour, the doctor came out of the room to a worried and anxious Toya, a peeved Sakura, an ignored Tomoyo, and a cloaked Yamazaki.
'What is the news doctor?' Toya asked.
'I am afraid that Mister Tsukishiro is in a coma.' He said. 'And Yamazaki is breaking up with Chiharu to be with Alex, who also loves Xellos.' He told them all.
Toya gasped and everyone turned around to look at Yamazaki who had shifty eyes.
'They warned me this would happen if this turned into a soap-opera!!' he yelled and ran away crying.
Toya went into Yuki's hospital room to talk to him. He sat down on one of the hospital chairs and started to blink really fast.
'Well, Yuki. it seems you're in a coma. I don't know if you can hear me.'
'I can.' Yuki said, but Toya thought it was in his head.
'I don't know how I can go back to Tomoeda now, with you in a coma, and Yamazaki with his personal life being revealed.'
'I'm fine.' Yuki rasped.
'Oh, I can just hear your sweet voice now. I have to leave this room Yuki, good bye.' Toya said, and ran awee crying.
'Hee?' (Pronounced héé?) Yuki asked, but no one heard him. Maybe because he was now... A HUMAN VEGETABLE!! BWA HA HA!!
Since this is Easy Come, Easy Go World, instead of just crowing in the morning, the Rooster sings "Easy Come, Easy Go!" and it is the ONLY song that the radio stations ever play.
The next morning, after the Easy Come, Easy Go rush was over, Yamazaki came by with a shot of scotch for Yuki.
'Hey buddy.' Yamazaki said. 'I smuggled this in for you!'
Yuki looked up. 'No! Scotch bring pain!' he said. Yamazaki screamed in horror and took one of Yuki's pillows and suffocated him until he really WAS in a coma, like Barney did on The Simpsons. Then he jumped out of the window and ran away.
Later on, Fujitaka came by with some food that he cooked. Because he cooks food.
'Hey, Yuki, I know you are a human vegetable now, but I brought you some food anyway. It is petrified health food!' he said and danced around until he collapsed and had to be dragged out by the nurses, who were actually Toya and Yamazaki dressed in nun-costumes for some reason.
'Lets get him outta here.' Toya said to Yamazaki, suspiciously. Yamazaki nodded and they put Yuki in a duffle bag and ran out of the hospital. They then brought him to one of those hippie-natural remedy people who tried to bring him back to consciousness by putting rose- petals on his eyes and doing the rain dance. When that didn't work and they asked her to try something else, she said that her chi was low, and that she needed to recuperate.
'I know another place we can bring him.' Yamazaki said and they set off to the other place, which was even stranger than the last.
'Wait here.' Yamazaki said, and ran into the back room. Then he came out again, wearing pink and purple robes with big gaudy fake-pearls around his neck.
'Welcome children, to the house of Madam Yamazaki Shabooboo!' he said, and then he fell to the ground, going into a psychic trance thing. Then he got up. 'What is it you need help with? Oh, wait, the spirits are telling me! You need. to bring your friend in the bag there out of a coma!'
Toya stared. 'H-how did you know?' he asked stupidly.
'I know many things, but what the spirits won't tell me is your credit- card number!' he said in a strange voice. Toya handed him his credit card, health card, bankcard, AND library card!
'There ya go!' he said.
'Very well.' Yamazaki sat down on the floor and started to sing Easy Come, Easy Go to himself. Then he ate his clogs in anger.
'This one is heavily intoxicated! We will have to have a séance!!' Yamazaki said and they all sat in a circle and started to hum Easy Come, Easy Go to themselves.
'Ohhhh, great spirits of the wild blue yonnderrrr!' Yamazaki chanted. 'Pleaaaase get me a burger and frieeesss!!!'
SUDDENLY! A burger and fries appeared on Yuki's face and he ate it hungrily.
'YUKI!! YOU'RE CURED!!' Toya yelled happily.
'I suppose I was just really hungry!' Yuki said, and they all laughed, laughed, laughed the night away.
The next day, they were on the plane home.
'I'm sorry I ruined our honeymoon, Toya.' Yuki said sadly.
Toya smiled. 'That's okay, Yuki, we can always have fun in "My Big Fat Anime Life!" as a television series!'
'We sure can, Toya. We sure can!' Yuki said ate some Belgian Waffles in triumph.
Then, the fight attendants came out and started to sing Easy Come, Easy Go, and soon the whole plane had joined in.
"Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah! Doo doo doo doo doo! EASY COME, EASY GO!"
FIN.
.Little did they know that Kaho was on the wing of the plane.