Title: I'm Ok
Author: Jackiwi jackiwi2002@yahoo.com
Spoilers: Frozen and Abyss (season 6)
Set: straight after abyss
Rating: PG13
Pairing: Sam and Jack
Achieve: Fanfiction.net - anywhere else please ask before taking.
Disclaimer: The usual. I don't own any of the characters or any of the
stargate franchise. This story is purely to entertain, and no copyright
infringement is intended. This story is my own original work based on
stargate owned by MGM, double secret and Gekko corp.
Authors note: Just a little story, with some nice angst. Hope you like it!
Let me know what you think. (
I'M OK
" Ok, Ok! I'm getting sick of your complaining anyway. You can go home."
"Yes, thanks doc. You know it makes sense!"
"Yes, well. There is one condition though."
"I knew it was to good to be true." Jack mutters as he jumps of the bed in the infirmary. The same bed he'd spent the last two weeks lying in. Doctor Faiser ignores his comment and hands him a bottle of pills, along with her best, 'do what I tell you or else' look. There isn't a single person on the base who would dare challenge that look.
"Take one of these pills everyday until there gone," Ok, he can handle that! "And." Hey! She said ONE condition, " I'm sending Major carter home with you." Huh! "She's got some down time, and she's agreed to keep an eye on you. I'm still not 100% sure I should even be letting you leave yet."
"Doc!" the sound of his mock annoyance came out in a short outburst, but he didn't make a big deal out of it. Inside he was grateful that Carter would be there. Not really the keeping an eye on him part, because he didn't think he needed that, but just the whole being there part made him feel better.
"Hey, just be grateful it's not syler" She called back as she left to take care of another unfortunate victim of some mission.
**
"Are you sure your alright, sir. You look a little.pasty."
"Will ya stop fussing? I'm fine."
Sam looks at him suspiciously; she knew he'd be a difficult patient. Two hours after they left the infirmary and had stopped for a few papers and some supplies from the grocers, they arrive back at Jack's house. Now, after a little dinner, made up of odds and ends from the cupboard, Sam was getting worried. She knew he'd been though a lot, but she also couldn't even begin to imagine the pain it had caused.
Jack knew that he wasn't fine. Every time he closed his eyes he still sees the knives flying towards him. The face of his torment, laughing with glee as he slowly drifts away from life only to be pulled back to face the same fate again and again.
Night falls over the house like a blanket, and Jack and Sam bid each other goodnight, but neither really wants to turn their back and walk away. However, the situation, as it stands, leaves them little choice, and so they turn and enter their separate bedrooms.
Ironic that Sam had promised to take care of Jack while it seemed, at least to her that she was in a worse state than him. Jack never was one to make his feelings known and therefore came across as being fine. Sam knew otherwise. It had to be otherwise. If the mere thought of what he had gone though could make her hands shake and her skin crawl whilst leaving a burn in the pit of her stomach, actually having gone though it, Jack must be suffering. And that's why she decided to leave the door ajar; so she could be there if the night brought the terrors she suspected it would.
** Trapped. He is trapped. Inside a coffin, and there is no air. He can't breath. He's banging on the lid and the sides, shouting as loud as he can, but no one can hear him. No one comes. His lungs burn and everything is black.
Hearing shouts she sits bolt upright, and immediately remembers where she is and why she's there. She shoots out of bed and runs the short distance out the door and across the hall.
His head is filled with a laugh so loud it almost feels like his ears are going to bleed. Suddenly the lid splits and a bright light blinds him. With a sharp intake of breath he sits up, but everything is dark again, and it's gone quite.
"Colonel! Jack?"
It takes him a minute to realise his awake, let along take in the fact that Sam is sitting on the bed next to him, with her hand on his shoulder.
"Jack?" She asks again, in a softer tone.
"Wh.what?"
"Are you ok, sir? You where shouting."
"Was I? Sorry." He apologises, rubbing his hand over his face and though his hair.
"Don't be. I know what its like." Sam said, rubbing her hand peacefully over his arm, " Do you need anything, water, a hot drink.?"
"No, no, I'm fine." He turns to look at her, her blue eyes reflecting only the sliver of light coming though the door, "I think I just need to get some sleep." He leys down, leaving Sam alone, not quite knowing what to do, but knowing she doesn't want to leave. Not now. Not like this.
Not seeing any other way, she decides to just tell him the truth.
"Jack, Can I. is it ok if I.. Stay?" Looking down at her hands she is thankful when his agreement comes. She moves to lay behind him, ever conscious of the rules and therefore insuring there's a good distance between their bodies. The two of them lie in silence for a minute or so, before Carter loses her grip on any self-control she had over what comes out of her mouth.
Somehow, the fact that she wasn't looking him in the eye made it easier. She needed to tell him this, and he needed to hear it.
"From the second you went though that gate, I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't say anything, I didn't want to risk you changing your mind, and not having the Tok'ra implanted, and I knew that if that happened, the disease would kill you. There was no way I could have handled that." Her whispers almost fill the room as Jack listens attentively.
" When I heard what that Tok'ra had done, I was physically sick. I just wanted to get to you, somehow, and bring you home. Baal, what he did to you, I can't even imagine going though that, and I'm so sorry." her voice breaks, but she fights it, "I am so sorry that you had to go though that. It was my fault! I should never have let that happen to you." Shocked at what he's hearing, he turns over to face her, taking her face in his hands, and wiping away a tear with his thumb.
"No matter what happened, it was not your fault. I don't blame you for any of this."
"But. I should have gotten to you sooner, I ."
"Hey! I don't want to hear that, is that clear. It was not your fault, there was nothing you could have done differently."
"I talked you into taking that tok'ra." She raises her voice with a renewed determination. "You ended up in that situation because of me, because I was selfish, because I knew that I couldn't live with out you." Her voice trails off into silence and hot tears flood her face, catching his fingers; still lightly resting on her face.
"No, Sam. Don't do this. Don't beat yourself up over this. Its over now. I'm here, alive and kicking, and I'm Ok. I'm ok."
He pulls her into a hug, and there she stays, so close to him, she can hear his heat beating, steady and strong. A sound that fills her, reassures her. A sound that she'll never forget.
THE END
I'M OK
" Ok, Ok! I'm getting sick of your complaining anyway. You can go home."
"Yes, thanks doc. You know it makes sense!"
"Yes, well. There is one condition though."
"I knew it was to good to be true." Jack mutters as he jumps of the bed in the infirmary. The same bed he'd spent the last two weeks lying in. Doctor Faiser ignores his comment and hands him a bottle of pills, along with her best, 'do what I tell you or else' look. There isn't a single person on the base who would dare challenge that look.
"Take one of these pills everyday until there gone," Ok, he can handle that! "And." Hey! She said ONE condition, " I'm sending Major carter home with you." Huh! "She's got some down time, and she's agreed to keep an eye on you. I'm still not 100% sure I should even be letting you leave yet."
"Doc!" the sound of his mock annoyance came out in a short outburst, but he didn't make a big deal out of it. Inside he was grateful that Carter would be there. Not really the keeping an eye on him part, because he didn't think he needed that, but just the whole being there part made him feel better.
"Hey, just be grateful it's not syler" She called back as she left to take care of another unfortunate victim of some mission.
**
"Are you sure your alright, sir. You look a little.pasty."
"Will ya stop fussing? I'm fine."
Sam looks at him suspiciously; she knew he'd be a difficult patient. Two hours after they left the infirmary and had stopped for a few papers and some supplies from the grocers, they arrive back at Jack's house. Now, after a little dinner, made up of odds and ends from the cupboard, Sam was getting worried. She knew he'd been though a lot, but she also couldn't even begin to imagine the pain it had caused.
Jack knew that he wasn't fine. Every time he closed his eyes he still sees the knives flying towards him. The face of his torment, laughing with glee as he slowly drifts away from life only to be pulled back to face the same fate again and again.
Night falls over the house like a blanket, and Jack and Sam bid each other goodnight, but neither really wants to turn their back and walk away. However, the situation, as it stands, leaves them little choice, and so they turn and enter their separate bedrooms.
Ironic that Sam had promised to take care of Jack while it seemed, at least to her that she was in a worse state than him. Jack never was one to make his feelings known and therefore came across as being fine. Sam knew otherwise. It had to be otherwise. If the mere thought of what he had gone though could make her hands shake and her skin crawl whilst leaving a burn in the pit of her stomach, actually having gone though it, Jack must be suffering. And that's why she decided to leave the door ajar; so she could be there if the night brought the terrors she suspected it would.
** Trapped. He is trapped. Inside a coffin, and there is no air. He can't breath. He's banging on the lid and the sides, shouting as loud as he can, but no one can hear him. No one comes. His lungs burn and everything is black.
Hearing shouts she sits bolt upright, and immediately remembers where she is and why she's there. She shoots out of bed and runs the short distance out the door and across the hall.
His head is filled with a laugh so loud it almost feels like his ears are going to bleed. Suddenly the lid splits and a bright light blinds him. With a sharp intake of breath he sits up, but everything is dark again, and it's gone quite.
"Colonel! Jack?"
It takes him a minute to realise his awake, let along take in the fact that Sam is sitting on the bed next to him, with her hand on his shoulder.
"Jack?" She asks again, in a softer tone.
"Wh.what?"
"Are you ok, sir? You where shouting."
"Was I? Sorry." He apologises, rubbing his hand over his face and though his hair.
"Don't be. I know what its like." Sam said, rubbing her hand peacefully over his arm, " Do you need anything, water, a hot drink.?"
"No, no, I'm fine." He turns to look at her, her blue eyes reflecting only the sliver of light coming though the door, "I think I just need to get some sleep." He leys down, leaving Sam alone, not quite knowing what to do, but knowing she doesn't want to leave. Not now. Not like this.
Not seeing any other way, she decides to just tell him the truth.
"Jack, Can I. is it ok if I.. Stay?" Looking down at her hands she is thankful when his agreement comes. She moves to lay behind him, ever conscious of the rules and therefore insuring there's a good distance between their bodies. The two of them lie in silence for a minute or so, before Carter loses her grip on any self-control she had over what comes out of her mouth.
Somehow, the fact that she wasn't looking him in the eye made it easier. She needed to tell him this, and he needed to hear it.
"From the second you went though that gate, I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't say anything, I didn't want to risk you changing your mind, and not having the Tok'ra implanted, and I knew that if that happened, the disease would kill you. There was no way I could have handled that." Her whispers almost fill the room as Jack listens attentively.
" When I heard what that Tok'ra had done, I was physically sick. I just wanted to get to you, somehow, and bring you home. Baal, what he did to you, I can't even imagine going though that, and I'm so sorry." her voice breaks, but she fights it, "I am so sorry that you had to go though that. It was my fault! I should never have let that happen to you." Shocked at what he's hearing, he turns over to face her, taking her face in his hands, and wiping away a tear with his thumb.
"No matter what happened, it was not your fault. I don't blame you for any of this."
"But. I should have gotten to you sooner, I ."
"Hey! I don't want to hear that, is that clear. It was not your fault, there was nothing you could have done differently."
"I talked you into taking that tok'ra." She raises her voice with a renewed determination. "You ended up in that situation because of me, because I was selfish, because I knew that I couldn't live with out you." Her voice trails off into silence and hot tears flood her face, catching his fingers; still lightly resting on her face.
"No, Sam. Don't do this. Don't beat yourself up over this. Its over now. I'm here, alive and kicking, and I'm Ok. I'm ok."
He pulls her into a hug, and there she stays, so close to him, she can hear his heat beating, steady and strong. A sound that fills her, reassures her. A sound that she'll never forget.
THE END