Tamashii no Unmei
by Sageseeker777
Chapter One
There was no help for him. Whatever he faced, now and forever, no one would save him from it.
-Orson Scott Card,
"Ender's Game"
Truth is all in the way you perceive it.
-Akagi-sempai
Have Faith, for the endgame has already been written...
-Muad'Dib
"Dune"
by Robert Heinlein
Four years.
Gohan's most prevalent memory was of his room. Of his ceiling.
He was staring at it now, trying to remember all of the times he found himself lost in thought with an open notebook in front of him.
Gohan opened the notebook, admiring how with all of the thinking he had done he hadn't put a single word to page. Not that he couldn't. He could write you a twelve-page essay about the chemical content of the atmosphere offhand. He could compose a positively artful short story about a stick figure with spiky hair drawn by his little brother.
But he really just didn't want to express his thoughts on paper.
He could remember when he had heard that his brother was going to be born. When he had just walked out on his mother's yelling one night. Every time he had come back after taking a break to train for a few weeks. On the anniversary of his father's death. Birthdays. Holidays. Those myriad occasions when there were just too many people were over.
It was so familiar. A warm connection to his past. All of it.
And he was leaving it, the good and the bad, at least temporarily.
"We can't wait to have Gohan in our school! I hope to see him on the first day." The principal was ecstatic, having seen everything Gohan had learned. Unfortunately, while he was intelligent enough, they couldn't skip him until he had at least a year of education in an official school.
Not that there was any problem with that. That was the point. Gohan wanted to get away from his memories, wanted to make new ones. Meet new people, learn how to deal with people his own age. He was fourteen! Supposedly, he was the strongest person in the universe! But... Man, he just had to go and depress himself, ne? It was getting to be a long-standing personal joke because it happened so often.
He'd be in the heat of things, then realize exactly what he said. And its implications. Argh. Never good to wait until after your words are spoken to think about them. Never a good thing, that.
But school didn't start until next week. Right now they had to go into Satan City to finalize the terms of the apartment lease, and move all of Gohan's stuff into it. To this end, Chi-chi had rented a truck to take the two of them and the furniture into the city. Goten was staying with his grandfather for a few days.
The fact that they were doing this didn't really mean that Chi-chi wholeheartedly agreed with the idea. She just thought that this might be for the best. And better for Gohan. She couldn't have ignored how distant he was. How he would never confide in her all of his amazing new ideas and little thoughts about everything. How he wouldn't come to her anymore for help with anything.
So she wanted him to find others. To find a friend. But she had a little secret in store once they got to the apartment complex.
Gohan sat up. His room was empty except for his bed, and that was the reason he had come up in the first place. But they had a while yet until they had to leave, and he wanted to keep what good memories this place had grown for him.
He disassembled the bed and took the mattress down. Then the box spring. Then the frame. Slowly, for some reason. It was just so... final.
He would be back for a lot of things! He could make it back in twenty minutes by the air. Why was it so difficult to leave the only home he'd known since childhood?
The carving!
He could remember the day his dad had first shown him what his name was. How Goku had held him in the air above the door as he perched on the desk with only one foot. Together they had carved it, without a word until Goku whispered "This is your name son. Live up to it."
Live up to it. Aw geez, another depression. He might have laughed, but his mother called him from downstairs to leave.
The city was the same as it had been a week ago when they had visited the school. Except it seemed a lot bigger to the fourteen-year-old. This was really getting to him, the fact that he'd been beyond the solar system, fought villains that could make the average man piss his pants with a casual look, and he was nervous at living alone. He could clean. He could cook, and pretty well in fact. He could certainly protect himself.
His mom kept looking at him out of the corner of her eye. She could see his nervousness and wanted to reassure him, but he might react badly. She didn't want to leave him with that as his last memory of her in person for the next few weeks or so. Maybe more.
But, mothers being what they are, she reached over and held his hand. To her relief he didn't pull back, but squeezed it slightly. They shared a smile.
"Big city."
"Yeah."
"Can be a scary place."
"It just doesn't make any sense..."
Did you know that your father was afraid a lot of the time, son? Oh, always for others. He would give himself up in a heartbeat, because he made me promise to remember that he would always be by me if he was gone for good. But to wait for him if he wasn't near...
Yet, in the dead of night, those fears would all gang up on him, strip him of his strength in his nightmares. A hug and a word, a kiss, and he would forget them completely. But he did fear, son. And new situations aren't something you can just slide into like they're nothing. Yet the great thing about you and your father, Gohan, is that you always beat the fear. So don't worry little one.
"Don't worry, Gohan. It's just because it's so new to you. After a few days, I'm sure you'll be having the time of your life." Not on my watch, mister. But you would never go out and just abandon your responsibility, would you? No. You always accept it, even if you refuse it for a little while.
"Yeah."
The rest of the trip was spent in a comfortable silence. Soon, the fifteen-story-tall Moonlight Apartment Complex came into view from behind some other buildings.
Together they walked into the admin's office. These apartments weren't owned in a chain, so instead of a supervisor they had all of the resources of the place focused on their customers.
There were pictures all along the walls that told out a story of how the place had passed through the family until the present, each generation contributing something more. And at the desk was a man looking quite relaxed in his sharp cream-colored business suit.
While his mother and the man made some small talk and arranged the last details of the rent, Gohan had a look around. It all seemed fairly normal, but something plagued him at the edge of his senses. He couldn't tell what it was, so he effectively tuned it out for the moment.
"Okay, just sign here..."
"Thank you Mr. Mashiro. I'm sure that this will be a wonderful place for my son to live."
"We'll certainly try our best. Do you want someone to show you around this place?"
Chi-chi and Mr. Mashiro both turned to look at Gohan. He unconsciously scratched the back of his head as he said, "Uh... sure! Thanks." He didn't like being the focus of everyone's stare.
"Okay, then." He pressed a button on a pad sitting on his desk. "Usa will show you to your room, where the recreation area is, and how to access the City Help Desk from your room. This is the first time you've lived in the city, as I understand it. Ne?"
"Yeah."
"There are communication marvels that the Briefs and Satan families have sponsored for public needs. Usa will show you."
"Thank you, sir. I'm sure we'll meet again."
"It's my pleasure ma'am."
They exited the office and a young woman with light brown hair was waiting for them.
"My name is Usa. Good afternoon! Please follow me."
She led them to the main entrance, then up a rather large staircase and then to the left. She must have already known their room number because she didn't have to ask.
Once they reached the elevators Gohan asked why they hadn't taken the ones beneath the stairs.
"This building is shaped like a 'v' and your apartment is the farthest to the left."
"How many apartments are there in the building?"
"They vary in size, but there are one hundred exactly. Currently we have eighty-two tenants, including yourself."
"Whoa."
"It's a big building."
The elevator stopped on the tenth floor.
"You're lucky. The tenth floor is the only one on which normal size apartments have balconies."
"Cool."
"You seem excited."
"I am, really, I just don't show it." His voice sounded monotone, and he appeared distracted, so Chi-chi bumped him lightly with her shoulder.
"Hm?" he whispered.
"What's the matter?"
"Something's weird... off. I don't know. Maybe it's just me."
"You should pay more attention to that woman."
"I am, mom."
"I know you are, but you shouldn't be worrying right now."
"I'll try not to, mom."
Usa reached the door and turned to wait for them. She asked for the key.
"Only the administrator has a universal key, and even then he's only allowed to use it when the police are present or, in your case, when your mother is here. You're going to be living alone in the big city! How exciting."
Before Gohan could ask how she knew without asking, the woman opened the door and walked right in.
Chi-chi was surprised at how roomy it was, and at the amazing view. She stepped out onto the balcony as Usa showed Gohan around.
When she walked in, Usa was explaining the Desk to him.
"The Desk is the main terminal program for the big computer they've got coordinating all city agencies. You can use it to call someone in-city, alert the police, file taxes, and other things. There is an internet connection, and a keyboard can pop out of here if you don't like the wallpad."
It was really just a black glass square on the wall, until she activated it and registered it in Gohan's name. The monitor, if you could call it that, was twenty-five inches wide. The thing was amazing, and even cooler was the speed with which she flew through it. Pages whipped by until she left him at his new homepage, the internal network for the Moonlight Apartment Complex.
She went on to explain how to access everything, login, appliances, what to do in power outages (extremely rare), and stuff like that. Then she asked if they would like someone to bring all of their stuff up.
"No, thank-you. Gohan will get everything."
"Are you sure? It's what they're paid to do..."
"No, that's okay."
"Okay..." She obviously couldn't see Gohan's muscles through his baggy t-shirt.
"I'll leave you two, then. Call on me if you need me, the button in the bottom right corner. This floor is my responsibility, and there are two janitors who clean the floors in the hall and take trash to the big disposal on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, usually near six at night. That's what that metal bin stuck in the wall between rooms is for. It's nice to have met you."
"Good-bye."
"Thank-you."
After she left, Chi-chi and Gohan went down to get the furniture. Luckily, they had plenty of spare stuff that had been left at Grandpa's house. The Ox-king also set up a bank account for Gohan so that Chi-chi wouldn't have to worry.
"They are pretty friendly here."
"You won't see this level of service in many places, Gohan. The trick is to keep the customers they get. It's just amazing that they do all of this. I bet they'd do your laundry if we didn't bring you a washer and dryer. The room is soundproof, too, except for the door and the windows. So your clothes-washing won't make for your neighbor the next floor down sending complaints your way."
"This is awesome! But that lady, Usa, she was freaking me out with how she already knew everything about the situation."
"They probably have a big folder on all of their clients that they make the employees read. At least, the ones responsible for those clients' happy environment."
"Yeah."
"Are you ready for this?"
He closed his eyes and took a breath before answering, "Yeah."
"Back to 'yeahs', Gohan?"
"I most certainly am, mother." He allowed her a tiny smile.
She returned it. "So this is it?"
"I can believe I won't wake up to your cooking anymore. Any of a hundred things like that."
"Me neither." She sighed as they reached the car.
Gohan didn't want her to be sad. He hoped she wouldn't miss him the way that he already missed her, even if he wasn't so quick to admit it. Fat chance, that.
"Let's get this stuff up there."
Gohan grabbed the couch and his mom piled most of the small things onto it.
Chi-chi stayed in the room after the first trip, ostentatiously to arrange furniture. She did do that of course, but...
After five trips, it was done. It might have gone faster if he had been able to just fly up there, but he didn't want to freak anyone out on his first day.
When they were finished, they stood together at the door.
"Is this goodbye?"
"Never, mom."
She looked up at her son, who seemed so grown up, who had always risen to circumstance, who was really still just a little boy. A little boy who had never wanted to hurt anybody. There were tears in her eyes as she said, "I love you, Gohan."
"I love you, too, mom." Chi-chi could tell that he was on the verge of tears, too, even if anyone else might have thought he had just decided to speak a tad softer than usual.
"Oh, Gohan..." She wrapped him in a hug. He relaxed and hugged her back.
When she looked in his eyes again, they were red and teary. "Don't worry. You'll see me every day. I'll call you."
"What? But-" She stopped him with a finger on his lips.
"Hush. Goodbye." She kissed him and turned to leave.
"Bye, mom," Gohan said to the door.
He watched after she drove away, and wondered if he had made the right decision.
It was already five o'clock. He sat down on his bed and began putting things away. Once he had finished in his bedroom, he figured to head into the kitchen, and then relax for a while. There was television on the Desk, even if Usa hadn't shown him he was able to read entire pages no matter how fast she went. His mother probably figured that he had never watched it, so he wouldn't want to, and that was just fine with Gohan. He'd rather admire the sunset. Or something.
But before he left his room, he found himself staring in the mirror for a while. Same haircut since his dad had first cut it this way. Same eyes, that charcoal color that wasn't black, but wasn't anything else. The kind that you can tell had a depth to them, even if it wasn't apparent on the outside. He wondered if his dad had that depth. That part he'd kept hidden, the part like the one that 'night' in the room of Spirit and Time where he had maxed out his power out of sight of his son. The cool, intelligent part that only his enemies were allowed to glimpse. And probably his wife.
With a sigh he rose and stretched. After he got the kitchen done, he'd probably just go straight to bed.
-*-
The first day of school.
The first day of school!
The first day of school!
Videl was excited and annoyed by the whole ordeal. She had needed to argue it over the phone with her father for an hour, that she wouldn't be going to that stuffy all-girls school for high school. Plus, she was going into a grade higher than normal because of what she had been taught already! It seemed that she already had eight high school credits.
She picked out a blue skirt and a white blouse. They would match her new blue backpack.
On the point of her father, what a liar! What a coward! He had the gall to 'inspect his empire' every six months on three-month trips. When he was around at all, he was buried beneath a pile of reporters and women. And then he had the nerve to claim that he was worried about her education?!
It was getting ridiculous. She wouldn't be surprised if he missed her birthday again, come October.
She grabbed a bagel for breakfast. Not too much food today, in case she felt bad or something. Normally, though, her appetite would be tremendous.
So many things had changed since she discovered her new strength. She found her want for food increased, and she didn't gain a pound. She had to get Bulma to build gym equipment that could stand up to her strength, but then discovered it was already made. For her husband, most likely.
Other things, too. Like how she was learning new techniques just by focusing on certain ideas that sometimes caught her attention. It was like they were already there and just needed to be remembered. And then there was the way her muscles never seemed to grow, but her actual strength did. At first it had angered her, but now it was just another oddity.
Also there was how her emotion, which she had always been taught to keep out of a fight, just made her fight better, stronger, and faster.
Except that there didn't seem to be a point to it sometimes. Her father was the original reason she had started, and then to escape her mother's death, just like her dad. No other fighter was any real opposition, except for the holo-simulator, which was able to match her perfectly. Although, she had never gone so far as to challenge her father. His image was too important to him.
Yet, even if she defeated him they would say that it was because of him. Because she was his daughter. She was living in his shadow. That wasn't right, not with all of the physical torture she had put herself through.
Videl began the trek to school.
It was crowded. She hadn't been expecting these numbers. It was a mob. A throng. A mass of humanity.
But at least every teacher didn't know you by name, and every kid knew enough about you to have been your best friend since you were four.
As far as she knew, only one other girl in her class had even the slightest chance of being allowed to go to a public school. Videl was smart enough that even after four years of the worst school in the world, she would be able to make it into college. All she did besides fight nowadays was read. Once she discovered that she could move faster than normal people, she found that she could see faster. This came from her fights against holographic enemies, who were the only people she knew that could match her. And from this she discovered that she could read faster, with greater comprehension than ever before.
And so she inhaled books. It was fun to get lost and not realize that it was three in the morning on a Sunday night.
But once she found her first class, her day began to make a downward spiral off of the optimistic flight it had been on.
She was in three honors classes, a foreign language, an elective that she thought might be fun, and a required course that had nothing to do with any mainstream education.
So she sat through an hour of Chemistry.
In the halls she noticed something strange going on that she couldn't quite place. It was strange.
After an hour of Algebra two she had figured it out, she felt as though every boy was staring at her in the halls. This thought made her slide down a little further in her seat. She didn't feel that she was really anything special, besides her natural abilities, but it kept happening. Disgusting. Not all of them, however, just the ones who seemed like they might not care too much about women in general.
An hour of German passed by, then lunch, and then an hour of Literature two. Around twelve something she was able to relax in Keyboarding and Business Skills, but ended the day in Health. Of all the horrible classes she'd had, mostly just because she was so far ahead, Health was the worst.
While everything so far had just been rather boring, she found a lot of people were like animals in this class. If you weren't really quiet, then you were obnoxious and disgusting. Or neither, but then you were just ignored. There were just a few boys at the center of the pack, yet it was at their instigation that the others did anything. They had tried to feel up at least three girls, and continued to make comments about them. Nasty language spewed from their lips like a fountain. Videl found it sickening that one of those girls actually enjoyed all the attention and cheered them on. Then they turned to throwing things. The teacher had just put work on the board and taken the attendance. He sat at his desk, ignorant to everything else.
Videl had the work done in a few minutes, and tried to read for the rest of the time since she had finished all of her other homework. Even on the first day they had piled it on.
Her watch told her that she only had five minutes left, and she could see those boys looking at her from the corner of her eye. Not that she was worried, just that she wanted to think for a while. Her thoughts had wandered back to her father again.
As soon as the bell rang, she was out of the room and out of the school, into the wonderful sunshine that owned the day.
About five minutes into her leisurely walk, Videl realized what her father had done. He had left her to her own devices. He didn't care about her. He had abandoned her.
Not that she had a harsh time of it. She had just had nowhere to run to when anything went wrong. That would always make her stronger, right?
Quite unexpectedly, those same five or so boys from school accosted her.
She was so deep in thought that she didn't take any notice.
"Why hello there, sweetness."
What could she do? How could she make him see? Or would he never see?
"How are you today?"
"I saw you readin' in class. Do you like to read?"
Videl decided that she would just keep on the way she had. Today she had found that a lot of guys were ogling perverts. Tomorrow she would wear some baggy clothes and some nice shorts. If a guy liked her, let him try to see who she really was.
"That's a pretty dress you're wearing. Can I see what it's made of?"
Blinking, Videl found herself in the middle of a group of guys on a testosterone high pulling the tough-guy act. She didn't need this at the moment.
Then one of them lunged at her and almost planted a big, wet kiss on her mouth. He had intended to slam her against the brick wall she was next to. They were trying to hurt her? These bastards were ganging up on a defenseless little girl, and what reason might be behind that? She felt like throwing up.
And then there was the fact that they couldn't recognize someone from the family who the city had been renamed for. With all the times Hercule had gotten her on television, they must have just been unafraid of authority and public hatred.
Before any of the others in the group could try something, she was already a block away, running at speeds they could only imagine hitting on their own two feet.
Videl felt... Dirty. They had seriously tried to hurt her, and not just in the sense of a good fight. But soon those feelings that were close to shame, but not strong enough to break her self-esteem turned to a seething rage. This was what her father had done! Whenever he needed to act the caring parent, he had used her. Used her like the daughter she was. And then he just threw her away. That was the way those boys thought about women. No, girls rather. Girls they thought were small enough that they thought they could muscle into doing whatever the hell they wanted.
Only she hadn't done anything. Nothing! What a show of weakness! Unless they were seriously hurt, they would think her a target. Maybe tomorrow she would do something about that.
Except that she wanted to hurt something now.
One punching bag flew into the wall right after another. The little flying ball she used to practice speed was destroyed ten times faster than usual. She entered the simulator and ordered it to twenty levels beyond what she normally trained at, expecting to get the anger beaten out of her in a good fight. Unfortunately, she was beyond angry. The machine failed to keep up with her and ended up being defeated.
Now Videl was just angry that she was angry, and it began to cancel itself out. It fizzled. She took a shower, then she lay down on her bed and stared at her ceiling. This would have to change. She didn't want to have to deal with lowlifes at all, didn't want a reputation for her strength like only those on the fighting circuit knew about, attested to by wall after wall of trophy and medal downstairs. Useless things, it was like proving you could beat up a child. Although the opposite had happened in most cases. A mere child beating masters of the arts.
So she would just be... unattractive? That would deal with most of the guys in school, so that she didn't have to around after school every day and beat someone up. She would start by doing her hair in pigtails and wearing the baggy shirts she'd decided on before.
On other matters, she would have to find a tutor if she wanted to stay as sharp and ahead of everyone as she was. Her brain might rot if all she did was stuff that didn't challenge her. And maybe she would try to find some club or sport or something to keep her occupied. She doubted it, though. There wasn't too much that interested her outside writing and fighting.
Videl decided that she would squeeze some time in at the gravity machine after she finished that book.
-*-
Gohan had a bad day.
To start, it had begun with his mother waking him up. That wonderful surprise of hers had been that not only did she get a Desk and get herself added to the city directory, she had Bulma hack Gohan's so that she could call at any time and not have to wait for him to answer.
Then he had to pick his clothes from the ones he had bought, only his mom had put his somewhere and all of the ones in his closet turned out to be ones she had picked out. It took a while to find them, and he could barely get showered and dressed before he had to leave, which left him without breakfast.
After that, he had this weird anxiety from all of the people, like a nervous paranoia, almost. It left him soon, but he felt out of place for the entire day. And his class schedule had been screwed up, so he had to run fast to make it to them all, checking with every one of his teachers.
Beyond this fact was that he was able to ace these classes. If only they had applied the previous year... But even then, residents were selected over people from other districts, and he hadn't taken up residence until the last week.
Literature, Science, Geometry, Keyboarding and Business Skills, Health, and German. He already had about three languages down so that he could understand the rudiments, and his mom had thrown a bunch of German at him when they decided to go to school here.
Another strike against him was when he figured out that he wouldn't see any of the same people in any class. He was in three advanced placement courses, the highest he could go in ninth grade, and there just wasn't anyone who had qualified for all three. The others were electives, and the only person to share even two classes happened to be in his Health class as well as his Keyboarding class. And the guy hadn't even tried to say a word because he was surrounded by friends from other classes.
Next year he wanted to just skip to eleventh grade and take the honors courses. He didn't know if he was prepared to take that grade's classes, but they would be less hard than the AP of the same kind. Maybe he would take summer school to get all the credits in before the next school year started. It wasn't like he had plans, or needed a job with his family's excess wealth.
Lunch was probably the worst part of the day, because they would only give him a tiny portion like everyone else, and he didn't want argue with anybody. But it was like eating a single gummy bear for breakfast; it did nothing. Plus, the cafeteria food was unhealthy.
Right now it was after school and he was enjoying the sunshine. As he walked behind a girl with long and beautiful black hair walk in front of him, it dawned in his mind what had been bothering him for the last week. The girl whose potential he had released three and a half years before was that girl! The one who had felt so wonderful in his arms. Here she was. And her power had almost doubled! She knew what she was doing, apparently. Except that she didn't know how to suppress her power. Or probably use energy, either.
Before he could say anything, a gang of thugs from the school started walking all around her. Gohan thought she might know them somehow, although he doubted it, but he stood back anyways. Or rather, he ran ahead and stood in front of the brewing confrontation.
From a distance he could see a look in her eyes that said she was somewhere far away. When they got her so that she was cornered near a brick wall, she took notice of them. One made a lunge at her that she dodged, but she was gone before they could blink.
Gohan figured that she just didn't have the time to be messing with these guys, but either she didn't know or she didn't think through the fact that they would continue messing with her for a while unless they didn't want to. He decided to make them not want to.
Walking over casually, he inquired, "What were you guys trying to do to that girl?"
"What's it to ya, short stuff?"
"Yeah, wimp, you wanna pick a fight?" They were probably angry as a group that the object of their desire had escaped. Now they had to find another target for their aggression.
"What did you do to that girl?" Gohan was unfazed.
"It's none of your business!" said another.
In a flash of gold they were all thrown to the ground. Gohan struck a few key places that guaranteed they'd be hurting for a week. In addition to bad headaches from their cement pillows. He had only trained for about the equivalent of a month for each of the last three years, and that one near-death experience had raised the bar, but he figured he'd have to train his base level up. Maybe Bulma could help him, and she owed it to him after she had 'helped' his mother.
He felt for the power again. It seemed that she was angry now, and her energy was flaring. It was strangely reminiscent of a Saiyan.
Gohan was glad that he had found the source of his off feeling. It seemed that her power was just like his, but... more blue. Or purplish. It was hard to describe the way a person feels; it was just that everyone was different in their own way. Some that he could tell offhand were Piccolo, his father, and Krillin.
If his father were ever to come back, unless he was totally preoccupied at the time, he felt that he would know it.
Except that he wouldn't be coming back. Argh, another depression.
Gohan stared into the sunset.
From his vantage point, he could see clear across the city in one direction, and that happened to be West. It was amazing, and once he'd found it on his third day he had made sure to catch it every night.
Maybe he would take up art. It was hard for him to draw at all, but a warrior's precision had to be good for something besides battle. And it was just so beautiful...
Every day was different, and the clouds always changed their pattern. Hues of purple, red, violet, pink, blue, gray blue, sky blue, cerulean, just so many that it made for a sight to behold.
He sighed and went in after the sun was gone. His mom had made him promise to call during the first few days, then stay in semi-constant contact after that. Or else she would wake him up every single morning for the rest of his school life. She probably planned to anyways.
So he had, after school, but didn't tell her about how horribly off his day had been. Just that he wanted to bring his own lunch and maybe go to summer school to skip next year.
Now he just read for a while, until it was late enough that he could just fall right to sleep.
-*-
Videl's night was serene.
School the next day didn't seem as bad as it had, just the memory of a place where she was free to wear a mask like everyone else. It wouldn't be much different than normal, where only she knew herself.
Her trains of thought had ended on a stretch of unfinished track, and she was left in silence, until she picked up a pen and started writing. A few hours later, she figured she would type it up using the keyboarding skills she was going to learn in class. It would go faster than if she had to 'hunt and peck'.
It was late, so she turned in for the night. She couldn't sleep, however, and her mind just ran in circles wondering about everything new she had encountered and hadn't yet thought or cared enough about to face. It wore her down enough that she fell into a dreamless sleep.
---|=||\|