Disclaimer: Why me? There are thousands of other fanfic authors out there.
Hiko-sama's 50th birthday!!!
Hiko didn't really mind turning fifty. That was because he didn't look any older than he was ten years ago, or fifteen years ago, or thirty years ago. didn't he age at all?
But the strange people that he once thought were his friends were taking his day into and convoluting it into a nightmare. For one thing, his tiny beat-up shack was getting a little crowded. and he had a black eye from the earlier tussle with Sano.
The only thing good was that behind him Sano was in much worse condition, with two black eyes and a lot of scrapes and bruises. No one tangled with the thirteenth master of the Hiten Mitsurugi and gets away unscathed.
"Happy Birthday Hiko-samaaaaaaa!!!" a shrill voice cried out.
Everyone turned to see who it was. There in the doorway was a figure in a yellow kimono. She was carrying a large basket covered with a cloth. She smiled a wide smile and placed the basket in front of Hiko. Behind her came a young boy with spiky hair carrying a shinai.
There was a strange smell coming from inside the basket. A little fishy and a strange irritating odor that you could not define.
"What's that weird smell?" said Sano as he wrinkled his nose.
"It smells familiar, desu." Kenshin said. "I wonder where I have smelled that aroma before."
"Whatever it is, it smells horrible." Hiko said as he pinched his nose.
"The scent is most unpleasant." An even-voiced Aoshi said but his eyes were beginning to water.
"I told you it stank Kaoru!" Yahiko said.
"Ah, no, no, no!" cried Kaoru. "That is just the smell. I assure you it tastes delicious!" With that she pulled the cloth covering whatever was causing the stench.
The moment the cloth uncovered the thing, a wave of putrid air assailed their nostrils. When the smelly fog cleared, there in the basket was a sad-looking steamed fish. It had a few wilted pieces of garnish on the side.
Everyone just stared. This was the saddest fish they had ever seen. Dead or Alive. The one eye that they could see was discolored like someone had punched it with a miniature fist. There were bumps and gashes all over it's body and there were rips in it's skin everywhere. There were still some patches of scale all around and the tail was half hacked-off. Just beneath the gill, a chunk of meat was missing. The unfortunate fish also lacked a lower jaw.
"I hope it died before you did this to it, Kaoru." Said Sano. He chewed on the fishbone in his mouth.
"Wow, how could you give a fish a black eye?" Kenshin cringed. He pitied the poor fish since he had been on the receiving end of Kaoru's punches a great many times.
"What is it supposed to be, anyways?" Sano leaned in for a closer look, but back off like he'd been punched. He fanned the air around him. "God, that's nasty!"
"No!" cried Kaoru. "I worked real hard for this. I followed the recipe to the letter. There is no way this would taste bad."
Yahiko just snickered but didn't say anything lest he get a black-eye like the poor fish in the basket.
"Even the vegetables look mutilated." Hiko examined the garnish next to the fish. "What did you use to cut it with, a finger?"
Twin spots of red appeared on the raccoon girl's cheeks in embarrassment. Her hands itched to land a fist on Hiko's arrogant jaw but since it was his birthday she restrained herself. Barely.
"Hey, how come the fish's jaw is missing?"
"Well, the stupid fish bit me! Serves it right!"
"But Kaoru, the fish was dead when we bought it."
"Well, I'm very sure that it tastes good despite the looks and the smell." She said huffily. Grabbing a pair of chopsticks from her sleeve she picked a piece of fish. "Here! Who wants some delicious fish?"
Everyone looked at each other uneasily. Who knows what would happen to them if they ate that heinous thing?
"Hey! Isn't that Shishio outside?" Sano pointed out the window.
"Really? Where?", Koaru turned to see.
And with legendary speed, these great warriors ran like chickens being chased by a butcher.
"I don't see him!"
"Guys.? Guys???"
~ * ~ Author's notes:
Who would have thought more people would have reviewed? And over what I, and other reviewers, thought was the worst chapter. Not that I don't appreciate it. I really do.
To Fire Seed: What does LMAO mean? Ignorant of me, but I don't really know.
To Cat H: Aoshi will explain later. Dunno when yet though.
Oh, there's one more thing. There are requests for Okon AKA Ochika or Omimei to appear. ( I will use the name Okon as I'm more used to it. ) I have been thinking on it since the second chapter and I couldn't decide therefore I'm letting you people vote!
Should Okon give a gift that's naughty or nice? Suggestions are also appreciated. Though I already have an idea for naughty. Not too naughty though, I want to keep the rating PG.
UNFORTUNATELY, A FISH WAS HARMED IN THE MAKING OF THS FIC. But I assure you that it died before it could feel much pain.
Once again, Thanx to all who review. You really know how to make me happy, don't you?
Hiko-sama's 50th birthday!!!
Hiko didn't really mind turning fifty. That was because he didn't look any older than he was ten years ago, or fifteen years ago, or thirty years ago. didn't he age at all?
But the strange people that he once thought were his friends were taking his day into and convoluting it into a nightmare. For one thing, his tiny beat-up shack was getting a little crowded. and he had a black eye from the earlier tussle with Sano.
The only thing good was that behind him Sano was in much worse condition, with two black eyes and a lot of scrapes and bruises. No one tangled with the thirteenth master of the Hiten Mitsurugi and gets away unscathed.
"Happy Birthday Hiko-samaaaaaaa!!!" a shrill voice cried out.
Everyone turned to see who it was. There in the doorway was a figure in a yellow kimono. She was carrying a large basket covered with a cloth. She smiled a wide smile and placed the basket in front of Hiko. Behind her came a young boy with spiky hair carrying a shinai.
There was a strange smell coming from inside the basket. A little fishy and a strange irritating odor that you could not define.
"What's that weird smell?" said Sano as he wrinkled his nose.
"It smells familiar, desu." Kenshin said. "I wonder where I have smelled that aroma before."
"Whatever it is, it smells horrible." Hiko said as he pinched his nose.
"The scent is most unpleasant." An even-voiced Aoshi said but his eyes were beginning to water.
"I told you it stank Kaoru!" Yahiko said.
"Ah, no, no, no!" cried Kaoru. "That is just the smell. I assure you it tastes delicious!" With that she pulled the cloth covering whatever was causing the stench.
The moment the cloth uncovered the thing, a wave of putrid air assailed their nostrils. When the smelly fog cleared, there in the basket was a sad-looking steamed fish. It had a few wilted pieces of garnish on the side.
Everyone just stared. This was the saddest fish they had ever seen. Dead or Alive. The one eye that they could see was discolored like someone had punched it with a miniature fist. There were bumps and gashes all over it's body and there were rips in it's skin everywhere. There were still some patches of scale all around and the tail was half hacked-off. Just beneath the gill, a chunk of meat was missing. The unfortunate fish also lacked a lower jaw.
"I hope it died before you did this to it, Kaoru." Said Sano. He chewed on the fishbone in his mouth.
"Wow, how could you give a fish a black eye?" Kenshin cringed. He pitied the poor fish since he had been on the receiving end of Kaoru's punches a great many times.
"What is it supposed to be, anyways?" Sano leaned in for a closer look, but back off like he'd been punched. He fanned the air around him. "God, that's nasty!"
"No!" cried Kaoru. "I worked real hard for this. I followed the recipe to the letter. There is no way this would taste bad."
Yahiko just snickered but didn't say anything lest he get a black-eye like the poor fish in the basket.
"Even the vegetables look mutilated." Hiko examined the garnish next to the fish. "What did you use to cut it with, a finger?"
Twin spots of red appeared on the raccoon girl's cheeks in embarrassment. Her hands itched to land a fist on Hiko's arrogant jaw but since it was his birthday she restrained herself. Barely.
"Hey, how come the fish's jaw is missing?"
"Well, the stupid fish bit me! Serves it right!"
"But Kaoru, the fish was dead when we bought it."
"Well, I'm very sure that it tastes good despite the looks and the smell." She said huffily. Grabbing a pair of chopsticks from her sleeve she picked a piece of fish. "Here! Who wants some delicious fish?"
Everyone looked at each other uneasily. Who knows what would happen to them if they ate that heinous thing?
"Hey! Isn't that Shishio outside?" Sano pointed out the window.
"Really? Where?", Koaru turned to see.
And with legendary speed, these great warriors ran like chickens being chased by a butcher.
"I don't see him!"
"Guys.? Guys???"
~ * ~ Author's notes:
Who would have thought more people would have reviewed? And over what I, and other reviewers, thought was the worst chapter. Not that I don't appreciate it. I really do.
To Fire Seed: What does LMAO mean? Ignorant of me, but I don't really know.
To Cat H: Aoshi will explain later. Dunno when yet though.
Oh, there's one more thing. There are requests for Okon AKA Ochika or Omimei to appear. ( I will use the name Okon as I'm more used to it. ) I have been thinking on it since the second chapter and I couldn't decide therefore I'm letting you people vote!
Should Okon give a gift that's naughty or nice? Suggestions are also appreciated. Though I already have an idea for naughty. Not too naughty though, I want to keep the rating PG.
UNFORTUNATELY, A FISH WAS HARMED IN THE MAKING OF THS FIC. But I assure you that it died before it could feel much pain.
Once again, Thanx to all who review. You really know how to make me happy, don't you?