Attack! Attack! What the? Oops, I accidentally deleted my intro. Oh well, I'll type it again, please bear with me.

I just saw The Two Towers. All I can say is: no wonder they waited until Tolkien died to twist the movie.

1. Arwen wasn't even in The Two Towers. The only part that mentions her in the 300+ page book is when Elladan and Elrohir give Aragorn the standard.

2. There are some smooching that having no right to be in the book even after Arwen and Aragorn married each other.

3. The dawn-less day is at the end of the book, not the beginning or middle.

4. Three is enough for anything, so I'll abbreviate my list.

Paris – What do you think? Eomer?! Can you be clueless? You can figure it out! Come on!

Tarabrethil – I hope your hair isn't as short as Frodo's.

Disclaimer: I do not own Lotr, or else I would have fired and or sued Peter Jackson's romantic @$$.

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- Chapter Eight –

Our dear, brave fellowship was camping in the utter darkness with only Gandalf's glow-in-dark staff (bandaged and taped after falling off Caradhas) for light. Aragorn was polishing/sharpening Anduril (I think that's how you spell it). Boromir was sulking in a remote corner because he didn't like Aragorn. Frodo was dreaming fitfully. Gandalf was trying to remember which passage to take. Gimli was snoring loud enough to wake up the whole goblin population in Moria (and I think that is what he did). Legolas was looking for a mirror in his luggage. Merry was convincing Pippin to not attack everyone who was accusing him of knocking corpses down the well (if he did, all the armed men in the fellowship would become inanimate, providing he could beat them up). Sam was waking up every time Frodo stirred, so I can't say he was sleeping. Arileen and Lori were arguing just because they felt like it. Srenna and Srennan were in heated discussion about whether Jodie Ste. Emilion (Detective Conan- Manga) was really Vermouth and, consequently, whether they were both the same person as Chris Vineyard.

Suddenly, Gandalf stood up, waking the people who were asleep and startling the people who were preoccupied. He declared, "I have finally remembered the passage to take. We must make haste." Grumbling, the whole fellowship got up on its feet. Gandalf led them up and down tunnels until they were truly lost and couldn't have found the way back even if they knew which passages they took. Everyone was rubbing sore feet when Gandalf and Gimli went into a grand hall sort of room.

Legolas found a tiny round mirror in his pocket and jumped for joy. He hopped around the room much to the annoyance of the other members of the Fellowship. On one very exuberant hop, he knocked over a secret passage and trapped Gandalf and Gimli in the "grand hall". Srenna and Srennan were so irritated that they channeled the feeling and lifted the door clean out of the way. Gandalf and Gimli came running out. Gimli was panting incomprehensibly, "Tuh-thh-heh-meh." Gandalf said something about triggers, and started to run forward through the "grand hall".

Legolas twisted an ankle on the rubble-strewn floor, but had enough sense to keep quiet about it. He had no trouble getting out of there thanks to his ability of being able to walk on top of unstable material.

Frodo got an increasing sense of foreboding. Dust was falling everywhere, Merry, Pippin, and Sam were coughing really hard, and they couldn't keep up. The three hobbits fell in the middle of a cloud of dust.

Boromir disappeared under a giant block of granite that fell from the ceiling. Everyone became aware of the danger they were in, and ran out of there on the double. Lori realized that the block she was leaping over had Boromir trapped, so she drew her sword to chop the stone. The sword was surprisingly sharp as it sliced the huge block to pieces, but time was running out, and she began to hack at it frantically. Stone chips flew everywhere and added to the debris around them. The stone fell away to reveal a groaning, half-conscious Boromir. Lori pulled him on his feet by sheer desperation. They stumbled out of the doorway just as the keystone crashed down.

Arileen and the two Srennans each carried a hobbit. They were still coughing and very hard to hold. They ran out first and went to a corner. There, Arileen rummaged around for cough drops; Srennan was healing the internal damage the smoke and dust did; Srenna was putting them through compressed deep rest and relaxation. Off in the distance, they heard a wail. "Oops, that's Frodo," said Srenna automatically. 

Frodo and Gandalf were scouring the ruins for any sign of the missing people and hobbits. When they found nothing, Frodo let out a bleak wail. The girls and the hobbits rushed over to see what was wrong. Frodo fell upon the three hobbits and sobbed like crazy. Lori thumped the girls each on the head, "That's for making me think you were dead." All three girls started to protest at once.

Just then, Aragorn and Gandalf each held up a hand. Silence fell, and everyone could here sliding whispers down the length of the passageway.

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'K, here ya go! The eighth chapter to my seemingly never-ending story (hehehe) is here at last.

Any comments, and just stop to review.

Thanx,

Indigo Star

P.S. Has anyone seen Ararine?