Forever Beyond Good-Bye

By: ImaBedHeadWriter

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or any of the other character's involved in J.K Rowling's magically wonderful stories.

Chapter One: Hope Never Dies

"Harry?" Ron shouted, "Oh damn Harry…you did it again didn't you?"

Ron's eyes turned to Harry who was lying next to the sofa obviously asleep. It had been almost a year now since both Ron and Harry had graduated from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. And ever since then Harry's world had gone downhill quite fast.

Post graduation, Harry and Ron had each joined in fighting the war. The war that separated good from evil, and would without a doubt determine the future of everyone. They had won the war, but at a cost. Many had died, including Sirius Black. Sirius was Harry's godfather, and you may say that most godchildren don't know their godparents well anyway but this case was different.

Every since the two had met under strange circumstances six years ago they had been literally attached to each other. In fact if you hadn't known the truth you would've thought Sirius was Harry's true father. Majority of the time the two had always gotten along after a true scare the two had gone through. After all it had only been recently during their sixth year back Sirius had been captured by death eaters forcing everyone to believe he was dead.

But when Sirius came back, Harry had easily overcome the obstacle of thinking his godfather was gone. But now once again when the news came out…Harry refused to believe he was gone.

"Harry," Ron groaned setting down his briefcase. He knelt down beside his friend. Sure enough the proof once again straight in front of his face, alcohol.

"Oh hey," Harry finally woke up, "I was just taking a nap…"

"On the floor?" Ron questioned before holding up a glass bottle, "Harry what's this? You told me you were going to stop drinking"

"Stop yelling", Harry put his hands over his head, "I only drank a…a little"

"Right", Ron pulled Harry to his feet, "Go take a shower…no matter how drunk you are sober up because we have company tonight"

"Who?" Harry asked stumbling over a pillow he'd earlier thrown on the floor.

Keeping his friend from falling, Ron responded, "Remus…Dumbledore…Fred and George"

"Tell them I'm sick", Harry rubbed his eyes gripping onto the wall.

"I just might do that Harry", Ron nodded watching his friend carefully, "because you are"

Ignoring Ron, Harry after a few tries finally found his room, "Hahah funny Ron, you hid my room again!"

Ron shut his eyes slamming down on the couch. The circumstance he had come home to tonight wasn't exactly something he hadn't encountered before. Harry had his good days where he acted completely normal, but then hours later he could be a totally different person.

So many times he'd hid the secret for Harry. So many times he'd lied about where Harry really was. And now Harry was stupid enough to be caught in his own act.

Ron looked up when he heard a knock on the door. He listened to hear Harry was in the shower, so quickly he raced to open the door.

"Hey", Ron smiled seeing his brothers at the door, "Too bad you weren't here under better circumstances"

"It's going to be okay Ron…we'll talk to him", Fred pulled his younger brother into a hug.

"Fred's right…you've pulled him off the ground enough times Ron", George put a hand on Ron's shoulder, "It's someone else's turn"

"Afternoon everyone", Remus Lupin sighed taking advantage of the already open door, "Ginny and Albus should be here soon I'm assuming"

Ron nodded obviously very nervous. Remus gave him a reassuring smile, "Don't worry Ron"

"It's not this so much it's just that…it happened again when I came home a few minutes ago. He's in the shower trying to sober up", Ron bit his lip, "I can't deal with this anymore…he's my best friend and I just want him to be happy again"

Ginny Weasley too stepped around the corner, "Hello everyone. Guess there's no point in asking how everyone's doing…"

"Sorry to be running late", A tired looking Albus Dumbledore finally rounded up the arrivals, "Harry is err…here right?"

"Yeah", Ron nodded, "I'll go see how long he's going to be"

"I'm right here", Harry stepped around the corner, "What's going on? Why is everyone here?"

All eyes turned. But Ron spoke first, "Sit down Harry"

"What's going on?" Harry repeated taking a well needed seat.

Everyone gathered around, Fred and George sitting on either side of Harry.

"Harry we think you have a problem", Remus who was sitting across from Harry began, "and we all want to help you"

"Problem? I'm fine", Harry shook his head.

"Honestly you know you aren't fine", Ron shook his head, "It's been a while now Harry. He'd want you to pick up the pieces and live again"

"I don't….know what you're talking about", Harry leaned back into the sofa his head feeling as if it were spinning in circles.

"We all miss Sirius", Remus started up, "But there's a difference between the rest of us and you. We've dealt with it…and you haven't"

"Harry you have such a bright future ahead…with Voldemort gone…you finally have a fair shot at life", Fred tried to catch Harry's eye.

"What is this? I don't have to listen to this", Harry jumped up, "I'm leaving"

"It's called an intervention", Ron stared at Harry, "and you're going to hear us out"

"And I suppose your going to make me?" Harry rolled his eyes grabbing his coat, "I'll be back later"

"I'm not going to let you go apparate out of here Harry…god only knows where you'd end up. Probably get yourself arrested", Ron shook his head at Harry.

"Well that's a chance I'll take", Harry shrugged, "Next time you plan such a wild party please don't invite me"

"Harry", Remus snapped angrily walking next to the boy, "You walk out now and you better be prepared not to come back. Until your ready to let us help you"

"This how you all feel?" Harry looked around the room, "Well fine then…I'm outta here"

"Remus!" Ron blurted out, "What are you doing?"

"Trust me", Remus mouthed watching Harry open the front door, "He'll be back"

***********

"Oh Sirius…" Harry whispered to himself sitting down on a bench, "Why aren't you here for me?"

He knew deep down he'd just done the dumbest thing he could've. But he couldn't help but be angry. Why couldn't they just understand? Why didn't they care that Sirius was still alive? Harry knew he was. A body had never been found after all.

He looked up when he heard someone sit next to him.

"Sorry am I interrupting something?" A man only a few years older than Harry asked.

"No", Harry shook his head, "I was just leaving"

Standing up Harry walked down the street. It was a rather cold evening, and he wasn't sure where exactly he was going to go. It'd been at least an hour since he'd ran out of Ron's house, and already he was regretting it. But now that the alcohol was wearing off he was quickly coming to his senses.

He could honestly admit he'd really screwed things up lately. Everything he had, everything he'd worked so hard for had suddenly slipped out of his hands. He hadn't been able to handle it, and had searched Ron for help. And until now, that's where he'd been.

"Harry?"

Harry froze. He half hoped someone had come out and found him. But to his surprise it wasn't anyone that'd been back at the house. In fact it was someone he hadn't seen in a very long time. Hermione Granger.

"Hermione?" Harry questioned immediately recognizing the voice, "What are you…what are you doing here? I thought you were gone"

"I'm on holiday for a few weeks", Hermione suddenly frowned, "You're a mess Harry!"

Harry laughed, "Good to see you too"

Hermione studied Harry over, "You're shaking. How long have you been out here? It's freezing!"

"Oh you know me. I love the cold", Harry stared up at the sky, "But tonight…your probably right. I should head home"

"How are you doing?", Hermione grabbed Harry's hand, "When I left…."

Harry pulled away, "It's not going to be how it was before Hermione. I thought I made that clear. It's great that your back but…there's never going to be a you and me again. You chose a different life"

"Harry…when I left. You wouldn't listen. All you heard was what you wanted too", Hermione stared up at Harry, "I guess I just figured after all this time--"

"Three months and not a letter came. I waited everyday Hermione. I wrote you everyday. Surely you got my letters?" Harry shook his head with disapproval, "I have to go"

"Where are you staying?" Hermione gently asked hoping Harry wouldn't mind, "We really need to talk"

"Right now", Harry took a deep breath, "I'm staying at that park bench right over there"

Hermione raised an eyebrow at Harry, "What's going on?"

"I've been kicked out", Harry zipped his coat up further, "Gonna be a long night"

"You can stay---"

"No", Harry half shouted at Hermione, "I'm not staying with you"

"You aren't going to make this easy are you?" Hermione sighed, "Well at least let me take you in for the night Harry. I don't like the thought of you out here in the cold"

"I'd rather go crawling back to Ron", Harry bit his lip, "But I guess I'd rather not do that either. Fine"

"Thank you", Hermione sounded relieved, "What's going on with you and Ron anyway?"

"That's really not your business", Harry started walking, "I'll sleep on a couch and I'll be out before you wake up"

Hermione followed Harry, "That's really not necessary. Stay as long as you like"

"If I go back tonight the whole crowd will be there. If I go back tomorrow I can grab my stuff and get out of here", Harry shrugged.

"So that's it huh?" Hermione shook her head with disapproval, "You're just going to run away?"

"Pretty much", Harry nodded a smile on his face, "A little lesson I learned from you"

*************

Harry had fallen asleep the moment he laid down. Hermione could see by only briefly talking to him, there was much pain and suffering going on inside of him. The death of his godfather had pretty much taken Harry along with him. He wasn't living anymore, not freely. He refused to deal with the death and it was dragging him down.

She set her alarm hoping to beat Harry up the next morning. She also decided to write Ron and give him a heads up. She knew in hear heart even though Harry would be even more furious, the last thing he needed was to be out in the world on his own.

Even though the next morning her alarm hadn't yet gone off, Hermione heard Harry walking around. It was early morning and with the alcohol on his breath last night, she was surprised he was already awake.

Climbing out of bed herself Hermione walked into the kitchen. Harry was walking out of the bathroom when she met his glance.

"Thanks again", Harry spoke weakly, "I really appreciate it"

Hermione nodded pouring herself a glass of coffee, "Can I get you anything before you go?"

Harry shook his head, "You've done enough"

Hermione watched Harry walk toward the door. He turned around once to wave goodbye but after that he had quickly scattered.

With quite the headache, Harry made the short walk back to Ron's. It was early and to his liking there were few people out and about yet.

He dug inside his pocket for his key, but when he got to the door he wouldn't need it. The door was already partially open.

"Morning Harry", Ron stood on the porch, "Have a nice evening?"

"What are you doing up already?" Harry questioned, "It's four in the morning"

"So I noticed", Ron looked down at his watch, "I could ask you the same, if I didn't already know"

Harry was confused as he asked, "What?"

Ron grabbed the sleeve of Harry's jacket pulling him closer, "Next time you make a plan to do something stupid, don't tell someone who has connections with me"

Harry's mouth dropped open as Ron pulled him inside the house. Remus too was waiting for him inside.

"Going somewhere are you?" Remus stared at Harry, "Any reason we're not invited?"

Harry swallowed hard. Since Sirius had disappeared or as everyone claimed died, Remus had quickly taken the job as Harry's father. He'd been there when the news came out. He'd been there through many of Harry's outbursts. And he was here now. Only this time it wasn't sympathy on his face or in his voice. This time is was anger.

Feeling uncomfortable as ever Harry couldn't bring himself to look Remus in the eye. He heard Ron shut the door behind him and knew there was no escaping what was coming.

Staring at the ground Harry hoped to help things, "I'm sorry I ran out last night…I wasn't thinking"

"You're damn right you weren't thinking", Remus snapped his fist clenched in his hand, "Well…are you thinking now?"

Harry nodded.

Seeming to have calmed down a bit Remus took a step toward Harry, "First things first Harry. You're going to stay clear of the alcohol. We'll help you with that alright?"

Again, Harry only nodded.

Remus amazed at Harry's not putting up a fight continued, "Let's sit down. There's something else we need to talk about"

Harry knew what this something would be. And this was something he didn't want to talk about.

He shook his head, "I don't want to talk about it"

"Harry you have to accept it", Remus spoke softly, "I know you're convinced again that Sirius has only disappeared, but it's different this time. Sirius died Harry why won't you accept that?"

"He didn't!" Harry shouted tearfully, "He isn't!"

"HARRY", Remus put his hands on Harry's shoulders, "Don't make this any harder than it is"

Harry shut his eyes briefly, "I know you don't believe me but…he is. I can feel it!"

Remus buried his head in his hands. Ron could see he was quickly losing patience. That was one thing Sirius had always had with Harry. Even when he knew Harry was wrong he'd always been patient.

"I've already lost my father", Harry finally looked Remus in the eye, "I won't loose Sirius too. I refuse!"

This time even Ron felt his heart break. He watched Remus pull Harry into a hug and he too finally could understand why Harry wouldn't let go. Why Harry was trying to hold on to every last hope.

"I'm sorry Harry", Remus felt a tear brush down his face, "I'm so sorry"

Ron stepped forward as Harry finally collapsed to the couch. He was pale, shaking, and had tears rushing down his face. Ron had never seen his friend cry before, not even in the worst situations. He took a seat on one side of Harry, Remus on the other.

"We've been through some tough times", Remus spoke directly to Harry forgetting Ron was even there, "And were going to be going through some even tougher ones. But were all going to be here for you Harry. Every minute of the way"

"Maybe you should try to get some sleep", Ron suggested, "You look like you could use some"

"Can't sleep", Harry shook his head.

"Okay…well are you hungry?" Ron continued.

"Can't eat"

"What do you want to do?" Ron looked over at Remus unsure of what to say.

Harry shrugged; right now all he felt like doing was curling up in a ball and never going outside again. Feelings he'd been holding inside for a long time were finally going through his head and coming out. And although this was a good thing in some ways, it still didn't make the pain go away.

*****************

Six Months Later

"HARRY DOWN LIKE NOW"

Harry couldn't help but laugh. He didn't even notice the weather change. As rain poured down his face, Harry flew back down to the ground.

"We're going in", Oliver Wood rolled his eyes at Harry, "I truly think you'd stay out there no matter what. If Johannon knew we were out here we'd already be dead"

"We're both alive", Harry shrugged as he and Oliver made their into the familiar locker room's surroundings, "Besides if you don't tell I won't tell"

Oliver laughed, "Harry I really am glad you reconsidered joining the team. We all are"

Harry looked up at his teammate with a small smile, "Me too. But I'd better change….I have another meeting"

Oliver gave Harry a curious look, "Harry…your not still going on believing what they tell you are you?"

"Have to try right?" Harry shrugged, "I'll see you later"

"Harry I'm serious!" Oliver gave him a look of concern, "You'll only hurt yourself when nothing happens"

"I'll see you tomorrow", Harry tossed his bag on his shoulder. He knew Oliver was right. Nobody else wanted to go with Harry's theory. He and Remus had many arguments over the subject. But something deep down inside of Harry told him Sirius was alive.

"Potter. How many times do I have to tell you?"

Harry jumped at hearing the familiar voice behind him. It belonged to Brandon Johannon the captain of Harry's quidditch team.

Harry turned around smiling, "Busted huh?"

Brandon nodded, "I really am serious about this. When you get a day off take it! In fact I don't want to see you here for practice tomorrow. Is that clear?"

"What is that my punishment?" Harry rolled his eyes, "I have to be here…its team practice and we have a game coming up"

"You're my best seeker and I need you rested", Brandon explained to Harry, "If I see you here tomorrow you'll be sitting out next week's game"

"Fine", Harry sighed checking his watch, "I guess I won't see you tomorrow"

Brandon laughed slightly as he walked off saying, "Bye Harry"

***********

"Thanks", Harry nodded at Albus Dumbledore, "Remember…Remus doesn't find out I'm here. Right?"

"Of course Harry if you want it that way", Dumbledore agreed, "Let's just hope your right. The only reason I'm doing this is because of your dream. Your dreams have yet to be incorrect"

"Thanks Professor", Harry stood up remembering one last detail, "So…what do I tell Remus?"

"That you're helping me for the weekend. Because it's somewhat true", Dumbledore looked back up at Harry, "And if you can't convince him…well you'll have to tell him"

"He wouldn't let you", Harry reminded Remus, "I'll do anything to find Sirius"

"It's a perfectly safe procedure. I'm only going to try to locate the dream and examine it for myself. But Harry you have to understand…I might have to see some other things. Are you sure your alright with that?", Dumbledore questioned.

Harry shrugged, "I guess I have to be. I have to get going though…."

"Of course", Dumbledore nodded, "You know the way out. I'll see you tomorrow evening"

Harry nodded a bit uneasily. The truth was he'd only last night had a nightmare. The first one in the longest time. Sirius had been there, and he was alive. He'd rushed to talk to Dumbledore and they'd decided he needed to see it for himself.

About ten minutes later he finally arrived home. Remus was already there.

"Hey Harry", Remus smiled when Harry entered the room, "I didn't think you had practice today"

"Oh I didn't", Harry admitted, "Oliver and me went anyway…although I got busted. Not allowed to come to practice tomorrow"

Remus laughed, "Well you were warned several times"

"Uh…Remus", Harry asked, "I'm going to be gone for the weekend…I have to go to Hogwarts and help Professor Dumbledore with something"

"You're a big boy you can decide for yourself where you go", Remus looked up at Harry, "Although…I'd rather you told me why"

"Can't tell you. At least not yet", Harry explained biting into an apple, "Although I can tell you I've pretty hungry"

"You'll have to fend for yourself tonight", Remus explained grabbing something off the table, "But this came for you"

Harry looked curiously at the envelope Remus held. The handwriting was easily recognizable to him, but he was pretty sure Remus wouldn't notice. He tore the envelope open reading it silently to himself:

Harry,

We need to talk. Meet be tonight at our usual place around eleven.

Ron

Remus stood waiting for Harry's reaction, "Well who's it from?"

Harry shook his head, "Its just fan mail"

"Seeing as how you get so much of that", Remus asked sarcastically, "Looks like Ron's handwriting to me if I had to guess"

"If I had to guess", Harry repeated in the same way Remus had stated, "I'd say your being nosy"

"Sorry sorry, never meant to cross the line", Remus laughed, "If you could though come back at a decent hour. You know I hate waiting up for you"

"Then why do you is the question?" Harry crumpled Ron's letter up, "You're just to paranoid that I'm going to do something stupid. I'm eighteen years old remember? Now where are you going tonight?"

"Business", Remus sighed, "As usual. But I really do have to get going"

"Bye", Harry spoke through a yawn.

"Maybe you should stay in tonight", Remus grabbed his jacket, "You're looking a little pale today"

"I'll be fine…I just didn't sleep well last night", Harry rubbed his eyes, "but if you have to go then go already"

Remus laughed, "Bye Harry"

Harry waved Remus away, throwing his apple core into the trash he made his way toward his bedroom. He honestly wanted to tell Remus about his dream but he knew that was out of the question. His eyes flashed to a photograph on his nightstand.

A small tear welled up in the corner of Harry's eye. It'd been so long since he'd last seen his godfather. Each day that passed his heart sunk, there was little hope keeping him going. A hope that he'd kept hidden from most.

"Harry are you home?"

Harry brushed away the tear hearing the sound of his best friend. Taking a deep breath he walked back toward the kitchen.

"Yeah feel free to take our food Ron", Harry laughed leaning against the wall, "I thought we were meeting--"

"Oh yeah….well I figured you'd probably just be moping around anyway so I came early", Ron shrugged throwing his findings onto a plate, "But the reason I'm here--"

"That's exactly what I was wounding", Harry took a seat next to Ron.

"Talked to Ginny today", Ron looked up at Harry, "She had something interesting to tell me"

"She didn't--", Harry mouthed silently, "Well she shouldn't have told you anything!"

"Personally I think she wanted me to talk you out of it", Ron grabbed for a napkin, "Because it's pretty stupid. You're getting your hopes up for absolutely nothing. We've gone over this countless times Harry…"

"RON", Harry blurted rather loudly, "Just leave okay?"

"Harry you're acting insane! If Dumbledore is stupid enough to get your hopes up for nothing….it's almost been a year. Three hundred and sixty five days Harry…Harry where are you going?"

Harry gave his friend one last stare before he leaped toward the door, "Anywhere but here"

"Don't be stupid", Ron grabbed Harry's jacket rushing after him, "Harry get back in the house!"

Harry however was furious. He continued walking ignoring Ron's calls from behind him. He turned around once to make sure his friend wasn't following. Harry was relieved that he hadn't. The rain was still pouring down from the sky, but Harry liked it better that way. It fit with the way he was feeling.

"Just give me a sign", Harry whispered to himself as he continued to walk down the sidewalk, "Anything to prove to them you're still alive"

****@*********@***

Author's Note: The fate is in your hands! I really loved how the first chapter came out myself. Let me know by reviewing. Reviews are much appreciated and fully read through and considered. Next chapter I'll include my responses to what you may have suggested or asked about. Thank you in advance for taking the time to read chapter one to Forever Beyond Good-Bye!