A/N A special thanks to everyone who sent reviews.
Moswen – My theory on the trophy thing: Dean broke up with Rory causing her to lose the dance marathon. Jess stole it so that Kirk would stop rubbing the memory of it in her face.
Anyone with a different theory of who stole Kirk's trophy?
Chapter 4
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"Hey Taylor!" Lorelai greeted him with one of her annoyingly cheesy smiles that had never failed, in the past, to set right up his back. She had always thought that he was rather like a cat; aloof, greedy and loathed having his fur ruffled.
Today, however, her smile had backfired on her. Rory's face had clearly ruined the effect, because Taylor simply favored her with a respectful nod.
"Morning Rory. How come you're not at school today."
"Uh, annual Chilton staff meeting." She gave a little sniff. It was no fun being her daughter; everyone thought she spoke nothing but the gospel truth.
"No need to ask you why you're not at school." Taylor narrowed his eyes at who he thought was Jess.
"Staff meeting?" Luke suggested lightly.
"I don't know why I bothered asking."
"Ahem." Lorelai cleared her throat. "Jess has something to say, don't you Jess?"
Taylor looked unimpressed. "Oh really? If you're asking about a job, you can forget about it."
"No, I-"
"What have you done now? Has Luke finally thrown you out on the streets? Personally, I wouldn't be surprised. If I had a nephew who had a temperament like yours, I'd-"
"Taylor I want to apologize." Luke clenched his fists. "I'm really really sorry for causing all sorts of trouble since I came here. It's just, things back home haven't been easy to deal with."
Taylor looked from Rory to Jess. "You're apologizing?"
"Isn't he a sweetie?" Lorelai wrapped her arm around Luke's, her eyes twinkling brightly.
"You admit you've been a threat to the harmony of this town?"
"Uh, yes?"
"You admit to every single prank?"
"Did I mention I'm a strong believer of the 'innocent until proven guilty' theory? It's been shown to have worked rather well in-"
"Including the dead person outside my store."
"I didn't put a dead person there!" Luke yelled defensively. It was just police tape. God, this man honestly thought Jess would have no scruples in killing someone for the sake of a prank.
He was beginning to understand why Jess liked switching the aisle labels around in Doose's Market in his spare time.
"This is a miracle!" Taylor rose from his stool.
"Let's not get over stimulated." Luke mumbled.
"This is all Rory's doing isn't it? Rory, I don't know how to thank you enough! You've converted Jess into-into-"
"Taylor Junior?" Lorelai supplied helpfully, picking at her teeth.
"At last, a self confession placed at my very feet! Now Luke will have no choice but to pay me the compensation I demanded." The shopkeeper announced joyously.
Lorelai just gave him a half grin. She knew it was mean, but she didn't like seeing Doose looking so deliriously happy, even at Luke's expense.
"But the fact that Jess is here was mostly Luke's doing." She hinted.
"Luke? That buffoon doesn't know the first thing about controlling Jess, I would have thought THAT was obvious to everyone."
"I beg your pardon?" Jess's voice was dangerously quiet.
"Time to go!" Lorelai pulled at Luke's arm.
"He can't even run a proper business. No one really expected him to be able to take care of a teenager."
"Oh really?" Luke leaned over the counter menacingly. "I'll be sure to tell him that."
"Okay, peace talks officially ended two minutes ago!" Lorelai slowly pulled Luke away. "Time to go Lu-luminously happy boyfriend of mine! Bye Taylor, so glad that you could graciously accept his humble apology!" She knew Luke's temper better than anyone and it was coming in fast.
"Don't be surprised if my Uncle wants to talk to you up close the next time you see him." Luke barked behind him.
When they were well out of hearing range, Lorelai dropped his arm roughly. "You have got to control that temper! You'd have so much more fun at town meetings if you did."
"I'm gonna kill him. If I ever change back, I'm gonna kill him."
"And bloodthirsty to boot! Look, that's how we all feel, but you did a good thing…wait where are you going?"
"I'm still mad."
"Buy a stress ball!"
Luke was heading for the side entrance to Taylor's store.
"I meant from another store! Urrrgh!" Lorelai helplessly followed him inside. Perhaps she should have let him rant at Taylor after all.
Luke was calmly browsing through the shelves.
"What are you doing?" She didn't like the look on his face at all.
Luke snatched a bag of 'Kenman's Marshmallows' from the shelf and stuffed them up his shirt.
"You're stealing marshmallows?"
"You like marshmallows don't you?"
"You're stealing marshmallows to get back at Taylor?" Did that sound as pathetic to her as it did to him?
"Hey! I'm just doing what Jess does best."
"Luke. You just went through the agonizing process of apologizing to Taylor. Now you're going to piss him off again!"
"Come on." Luke took her wrist and led her out the front way. He flashed Taylor a cheeky grin, making the older man stare after them suspiciously. They had stopped only a little way from the entrance of the shop when Luke triumphantly pulled out the bag from under his shirt.
He shook it at Taylor, making sure that he saw what it was and then ripped the bag open.
Lorelai shuddered as the shopkeeper's eyes dilated to the size of tea cups.
"Want a marshmallow?" Luke offered her the bag while stuffing two in his mouth.
"Ah Luke, the universal top ten list of 'bad ideas' just got a new number one."
"He can't do much." He doubted very much that Doose would desert his precious store just to wring his neck.
"Uh Luke." Lorelai tugged at Luke's sleeve. "What's he doing?"
"Is that…?"
"A baseball bat."
"I think that has my name on it."
"He's a closet baseball bat serial killer!"
Taylor began to run at a furious pace towards them.
Luke blinked. "You don't really think he's going to use that on us?"
"You really want to find out?"
"Run!"
Luke and Lorelai fled down the street like wild hares. It was just in time as well; Taylor was already hard on their heels.
Lorelai shrieked. "He's gaining on us! Quick! Through the park!" She said this more for effect than anything else. The truth was, if she didn't have to run at that very moment, she'd be rolling around on the ground, laughing herself silly.
Two grown adults jumped over the bushes and wound their way through the trees. They could hear Taylor cursing after them, urging them on until his voice gradually faded into a whisper.
After what seemed like ages, Lorelai cast a quick glance over her shoulder. "I can't see him!"
"Are you sure?"
"I hope so, 'cause I…can't run anymore." Lorelai threw herself down on the green and began coughing heavily.
"Jess." Puff. "Needs." Puff. "To exercise more." Luke collapsed down on the ground beside her.
They exchanged looks and began to laugh.
"He was actually going to use that bat on me!"
"Would Jess know about it yet?" Lorelai asked.
"It's more than likely Doose bought that bat in the first place because of Jess. He's probably found some old law that permits it. If I find out that he's ever used it, I'll-"
"That's if he hasn't called the cops and turned us into outlaws first. We'll have to live off Jackson's private vegetable patch thanks to you!"
"Suits me."
"We'll have to dress in green tights. Do you have any?"
Luke didn't bother to respond.
"Okay fine, we'll come up with a new uniform. We'll be the Flannel Freedom Fighters. You can be the Fat Flannel Fryer!"
Again, Luke ignored her. He was too busy enjoying the taste of the sticky sweets he had stolen.
"Gimme those! Since when does Luke Danes eat marshmallows?"
"Well if I'm going to be a Fat Fryer, I'd better live up to my name don't you think?"
Lorelai tittered.
"What now?" Luke's voice was thick from the food in his mouth.
"Temper gone now?"
"It was a revolutionary cure. From now on, we steal something from Taylor's after every town meeting, deal?" He smiled. Lorelai stared, never in her life had she seen Luke smile so freely.
"Excuse me. It is still Luke in there, isn't it?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"It's just, well, Luke doesn't smile like that."
Luke reddened. "All revolutionary cures have side effects. I should probably consider taking depressants to counteract that."
"You don't go red like that either. Do you always get embarrassed this quickly?" Lorelai leaned over him to make him nervous.
"No!"
"Mmhmmmm." She lay back on the grass and pulled out a pink marshmallow from the bag. It was interesting having Luke this transparent. She was learning a little more about him every second.
****************************************
At the Gilmore house, the answering machine was taking it's seventeenth message that day.
"Moooooooom! I'm going to keep calling until this stupid machine breaks down. I know you're not at the Inn, so ring me on the number I gave you, pronto!"
*****************************************
TBC
Moswen – My theory on the trophy thing: Dean broke up with Rory causing her to lose the dance marathon. Jess stole it so that Kirk would stop rubbing the memory of it in her face.
Anyone with a different theory of who stole Kirk's trophy?
Chapter 4
***************************************
"Hey Taylor!" Lorelai greeted him with one of her annoyingly cheesy smiles that had never failed, in the past, to set right up his back. She had always thought that he was rather like a cat; aloof, greedy and loathed having his fur ruffled.
Today, however, her smile had backfired on her. Rory's face had clearly ruined the effect, because Taylor simply favored her with a respectful nod.
"Morning Rory. How come you're not at school today."
"Uh, annual Chilton staff meeting." She gave a little sniff. It was no fun being her daughter; everyone thought she spoke nothing but the gospel truth.
"No need to ask you why you're not at school." Taylor narrowed his eyes at who he thought was Jess.
"Staff meeting?" Luke suggested lightly.
"I don't know why I bothered asking."
"Ahem." Lorelai cleared her throat. "Jess has something to say, don't you Jess?"
Taylor looked unimpressed. "Oh really? If you're asking about a job, you can forget about it."
"No, I-"
"What have you done now? Has Luke finally thrown you out on the streets? Personally, I wouldn't be surprised. If I had a nephew who had a temperament like yours, I'd-"
"Taylor I want to apologize." Luke clenched his fists. "I'm really really sorry for causing all sorts of trouble since I came here. It's just, things back home haven't been easy to deal with."
Taylor looked from Rory to Jess. "You're apologizing?"
"Isn't he a sweetie?" Lorelai wrapped her arm around Luke's, her eyes twinkling brightly.
"You admit you've been a threat to the harmony of this town?"
"Uh, yes?"
"You admit to every single prank?"
"Did I mention I'm a strong believer of the 'innocent until proven guilty' theory? It's been shown to have worked rather well in-"
"Including the dead person outside my store."
"I didn't put a dead person there!" Luke yelled defensively. It was just police tape. God, this man honestly thought Jess would have no scruples in killing someone for the sake of a prank.
He was beginning to understand why Jess liked switching the aisle labels around in Doose's Market in his spare time.
"This is a miracle!" Taylor rose from his stool.
"Let's not get over stimulated." Luke mumbled.
"This is all Rory's doing isn't it? Rory, I don't know how to thank you enough! You've converted Jess into-into-"
"Taylor Junior?" Lorelai supplied helpfully, picking at her teeth.
"At last, a self confession placed at my very feet! Now Luke will have no choice but to pay me the compensation I demanded." The shopkeeper announced joyously.
Lorelai just gave him a half grin. She knew it was mean, but she didn't like seeing Doose looking so deliriously happy, even at Luke's expense.
"But the fact that Jess is here was mostly Luke's doing." She hinted.
"Luke? That buffoon doesn't know the first thing about controlling Jess, I would have thought THAT was obvious to everyone."
"I beg your pardon?" Jess's voice was dangerously quiet.
"Time to go!" Lorelai pulled at Luke's arm.
"He can't even run a proper business. No one really expected him to be able to take care of a teenager."
"Oh really?" Luke leaned over the counter menacingly. "I'll be sure to tell him that."
"Okay, peace talks officially ended two minutes ago!" Lorelai slowly pulled Luke away. "Time to go Lu-luminously happy boyfriend of mine! Bye Taylor, so glad that you could graciously accept his humble apology!" She knew Luke's temper better than anyone and it was coming in fast.
"Don't be surprised if my Uncle wants to talk to you up close the next time you see him." Luke barked behind him.
When they were well out of hearing range, Lorelai dropped his arm roughly. "You have got to control that temper! You'd have so much more fun at town meetings if you did."
"I'm gonna kill him. If I ever change back, I'm gonna kill him."
"And bloodthirsty to boot! Look, that's how we all feel, but you did a good thing…wait where are you going?"
"I'm still mad."
"Buy a stress ball!"
Luke was heading for the side entrance to Taylor's store.
"I meant from another store! Urrrgh!" Lorelai helplessly followed him inside. Perhaps she should have let him rant at Taylor after all.
Luke was calmly browsing through the shelves.
"What are you doing?" She didn't like the look on his face at all.
Luke snatched a bag of 'Kenman's Marshmallows' from the shelf and stuffed them up his shirt.
"You're stealing marshmallows?"
"You like marshmallows don't you?"
"You're stealing marshmallows to get back at Taylor?" Did that sound as pathetic to her as it did to him?
"Hey! I'm just doing what Jess does best."
"Luke. You just went through the agonizing process of apologizing to Taylor. Now you're going to piss him off again!"
"Come on." Luke took her wrist and led her out the front way. He flashed Taylor a cheeky grin, making the older man stare after them suspiciously. They had stopped only a little way from the entrance of the shop when Luke triumphantly pulled out the bag from under his shirt.
He shook it at Taylor, making sure that he saw what it was and then ripped the bag open.
Lorelai shuddered as the shopkeeper's eyes dilated to the size of tea cups.
"Want a marshmallow?" Luke offered her the bag while stuffing two in his mouth.
"Ah Luke, the universal top ten list of 'bad ideas' just got a new number one."
"He can't do much." He doubted very much that Doose would desert his precious store just to wring his neck.
"Uh Luke." Lorelai tugged at Luke's sleeve. "What's he doing?"
"Is that…?"
"A baseball bat."
"I think that has my name on it."
"He's a closet baseball bat serial killer!"
Taylor began to run at a furious pace towards them.
Luke blinked. "You don't really think he's going to use that on us?"
"You really want to find out?"
"Run!"
Luke and Lorelai fled down the street like wild hares. It was just in time as well; Taylor was already hard on their heels.
Lorelai shrieked. "He's gaining on us! Quick! Through the park!" She said this more for effect than anything else. The truth was, if she didn't have to run at that very moment, she'd be rolling around on the ground, laughing herself silly.
Two grown adults jumped over the bushes and wound their way through the trees. They could hear Taylor cursing after them, urging them on until his voice gradually faded into a whisper.
After what seemed like ages, Lorelai cast a quick glance over her shoulder. "I can't see him!"
"Are you sure?"
"I hope so, 'cause I…can't run anymore." Lorelai threw herself down on the green and began coughing heavily.
"Jess." Puff. "Needs." Puff. "To exercise more." Luke collapsed down on the ground beside her.
They exchanged looks and began to laugh.
"He was actually going to use that bat on me!"
"Would Jess know about it yet?" Lorelai asked.
"It's more than likely Doose bought that bat in the first place because of Jess. He's probably found some old law that permits it. If I find out that he's ever used it, I'll-"
"That's if he hasn't called the cops and turned us into outlaws first. We'll have to live off Jackson's private vegetable patch thanks to you!"
"Suits me."
"We'll have to dress in green tights. Do you have any?"
Luke didn't bother to respond.
"Okay fine, we'll come up with a new uniform. We'll be the Flannel Freedom Fighters. You can be the Fat Flannel Fryer!"
Again, Luke ignored her. He was too busy enjoying the taste of the sticky sweets he had stolen.
"Gimme those! Since when does Luke Danes eat marshmallows?"
"Well if I'm going to be a Fat Fryer, I'd better live up to my name don't you think?"
Lorelai tittered.
"What now?" Luke's voice was thick from the food in his mouth.
"Temper gone now?"
"It was a revolutionary cure. From now on, we steal something from Taylor's after every town meeting, deal?" He smiled. Lorelai stared, never in her life had she seen Luke smile so freely.
"Excuse me. It is still Luke in there, isn't it?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"It's just, well, Luke doesn't smile like that."
Luke reddened. "All revolutionary cures have side effects. I should probably consider taking depressants to counteract that."
"You don't go red like that either. Do you always get embarrassed this quickly?" Lorelai leaned over him to make him nervous.
"No!"
"Mmhmmmm." She lay back on the grass and pulled out a pink marshmallow from the bag. It was interesting having Luke this transparent. She was learning a little more about him every second.
****************************************
At the Gilmore house, the answering machine was taking it's seventeenth message that day.
"Moooooooom! I'm going to keep calling until this stupid machine breaks down. I know you're not at the Inn, so ring me on the number I gave you, pronto!"
*****************************************
TBC