(AN)---hmm, with the small (but very appreciated!!) number of reviews...I'm not sure how far I'm going to post on this story.  I've got several parts outlined in my head (some very good Sess/Kag scenes, too!), but I won't continue if I think that the story isn't any good, or liked.

Juxtaposition

Chapter Two:

The Path to Take

Kagome threw her head back and gasped, waking from sleep as if trying to break the surface of some thick, suffocating water.  She was sitting up, curled protectively around her own body without fully comprehending how she had arrived at such an action.  Focusing on her breath gave her an anchor, one that helped to coax her lungs and heart back into rhythm.  When she could think again without being filled with the complaints of her body, she shoved away her sleeping bag and drew her knees out.

"A dream," she whispered, her eyes wide and unseeing, "I knew it was only a dream."  But she knew better.  It was too vivid, too three-dimensional.  She didn't have prophetic dreams as far as she knew, but that didn't mean her mind couldn't bring her to an obvious conclusion.  She raised a not quite steady hand and rubbed soothingly at her temple.

There was no movement, but her attention immediately swung to Inuyasha, and she breathed a shallow sigh of relief when she saw that he had not changed through the night.  His beloved Tetsusaiga was sheathed against his shoulder, his arms crossed over it and tucked within the wide sleeves of his kimono.  It was the new moon, the blackest night where the stars sparked brightest.  It was also the night that Inuyasha's demon seemed to crawl back into him, allowing his human side to emerge for a few short hours.  His hair, having lost all its luminous silver, blended in with the shadows and became an ink-black halo, a deeper darkness.  She found herself staring into eyes nearly as dark.

She blinked.

"A dream?"  He did not whisper, but his voice was quiet in the small room.

"Did I wake you," she asked, not wishing to address his question.

He looked away and seemed to settle deeper into his spot against the wall.  "I wasn't asleep."

That's right.  He doesn't sleep on the night of the new moon.  They sat in silence again and Kagome stared at the line of her empty hands, thinking that so much had changed, and yet they still looked the same.

"What did you dream," he persisted.

Usually his showing interest in her would make her feel happy, willing to give or tell him anything he wanted.  But the dream demanded too much of her attention.  It left her shaky inside and filled with worry.  A dream, but it didn't have to be, might not fully be.  Not for the first time her heart beat with a certain amount of dread for the future.

She pushed to her feet and said, "It was nothing...I...I need some air."  With that she walked silently, but purposefully across the floor.  Without so much as glancing back at him, she palmed aside the door flap and stepped out, letting it fall closed behind her with a small backlash of air. 

A thin layer to separate them, and it wasn't enough.  She needed steps and space and distance.  The dream with its disgustingly obvious imagery was far too close to the surface, and one wrong movement in any direction she knew could send it brimming from her eyes.  If it was to happen or not, she needed to be alone.  She needed to think.

She stood a long moment, listening to the low hum of the wind, reacquainting herself with the soothing movements of her hair against her shoulders.  The night around her was a warm hand, loose so that a breeze could trickle through blessedly and calm away some of her anxiety.  To her right was open ground, a distant hill like a great hulking shadow filling the sky, and a small grove of trees that she almost couldn't see in its wake.  To her left was the main-house, and yet another slumbering hime-sama supposedly plagued by hungry youkai.  A grand house it was, but it wasn't home.  And it wasn't safety.

Away away, she needed to be away.  Just one moment that belonged to her and no one else.  She was moving toward the trees with their swaying branches, shifting black spider-webs against the sky.  She could sit among them and perhaps find some measure of comfort that she couldn't find in her companions.  At least, she could be alone.

...It wasn't the same tree.  Not by far.  But her fingers still blindly reached out and traced the spot that wasn't there.  Where Inuyasha had been staked to the Goshinboku...with Kikyou's arrow through the heart, the symbolic seat of his love for her.  Fifty years had passed, betrayals had come and gone, and that love was still rooted deep inside him.

That love would destroy him.

Kagome turned fully, sliding down the tree trunk until she was a small form at its feet.

This was her choice.

She stared out into a night darker than any she had seen in Tokyo, and wondered, not for the first time, if her path was as set and true as it appeared to be.  I chose this, knowing the path I would take and where it could possibly lead me.  I thought only of him and that any pain would be worth making him whole.  She drew her knees up to her chin and wrapped her arms around them, rounding her shoulders so that she was smaller and smaller.  But it's really not something I can do, is it?  There really isn't anything that can fix the damage that Naraku has done.

Time passed, only moments stretched too thin.  The branches above her shifted in response to the wind, glancing small star-filled patches of sky.  The unique and organic sound of leaves moving against leaves added to the illusion she had created of being alone.  The breeze pulled more at the tree; one leaf broke away from the rest and drifted down to lay quietly at her feet.

She lifted her left hand and stared at her open palm.  It was just another shadow among a world suddenly full of them, now that the moon was hidden away.  The same power that coursed through Kikyou, and still others before her, filled her.  She felt its movement through her whenever she raised her bow.  And yet...Kagome folded herself in tighter, knowing it was starting.  Images filtered through her mind, some of them ragged scraps of dreams, some handle-worn memories.

The girl that wears my face, and she will kill the one we both love.  Someday...could I ever feel so much hate?  I don't want to believe it, but once upon a time we were soul-mates.  Closer than that.  We were the same, but no more.

What would it take to wake her from the last moments of her life?  To wake her from the nightmare she now lives in? 

It...can't be done.  She is not truly here.  She is a shadow of a girl that once was, doomed to repeat the same memory over and over without hope of ever reconciling.  She will not find her peace, not in life and not in hell...until she destroys that which she believes has destroyed her.

...

He will let her.

His guilt makes him weak, unable to resist her.  He will never heal and he will never escape what has been done.  And she will drag him down because of it. 

Kagome pressed her foot down over the leaf, grinding it into the ground with all the frustration she felt.  Such an end so clear before her, but she was helpless to stop it.

What are these feelings?

Do I hate Kikyou?

I can't hate Kikyou.

It's not her fault.  She can't change what she is, just as I can't change what I am.  Who I might have been.

But I can't accept what she will do, no matter the pity I feel in my heart.  Her emotions, her consuming hate, it will take her to her second destruction.  And Inuyasha will go with her.

I cannot let this be.  For all that we have fought for, all the lives we have saved and touched over our journeys, and all that we have yet to do...But what can I do?  Kikyou will not turn from her path.  And Inuyasha will never fight her, not even for his life, not when he believes it is hers.

Can I really be thinking this?  But haven't I thought it all along? 

She doesn't belong here.  She stole a piece of my soul to drive her hate for Inuyasha.  She steals the souls of countless lost girls, all to keep herself moving through a life she detests.  She has betrayed us to Naraku...and...and she has tried to kill me.

Kagome felt the pain of that moment again.  How Inuyasha had turned his head and refused to look at what had been done.  She felt anger at how helpless the once sad and generous miko had made her feel.  Though it wasn't her near-death that still clawed across the surface of so many of her dreams, but how easily Inuyasha had brushed it aside.

Kikyou's hate will destroy me, too.  My path follows Inuyasha's, and Inuyasha will follow her.  I won't let him die without a fight, but to fight means to fight them both.

Her bitterness and his guilt, the cold shadow of a broken love that I can't escape.  The dream is where we go, but it can be changed.

The thought she had been fighting all night, even in her dreams, finally broke the surface of her mind.  It scared her with how solid and dispassionate it was.

Can I really be thinking this?  Yes.  Yes, I am.  I know how to save him...Three simple words, the only path her heart could see that might save Inuyasha from his past and himself.  Though it would undoubtedly destroy her...

Kikyou must die.

...To Be Continued...maybe

so, review!  Sorry Sesshoumaru hasn't been featured as a character yet, but he will be soon!  Well, I guess that's another 'maybe'.  Um, to the question, is Kagome OOC?  Some may think so, but I don't.  I think Kagome values her loved ones and friends above all else, and would definitely be willing to do whatever it takes to protect them.

But then, I've been told before that I see a lot of characters differently than most do.  I dunno.  My apologies if you think she's OOC, but don't let it chase you away from the story!

I like strong females, so I write strong females.

REVIEWER RESPONSES

I don't usually do this because I don't often have the time to.  But since there were only a few reviews, and I may not continue...I want to let those six wonderful people who commented know exactly how much I appreciate them.

Katzztar said: Your writting style is wonderful. It just seem to reach out from the screen and pull us in.  Please do continue

Loki: Thanks!  *blushes* I'm glad you think so!  Here's the next chapter, I hope you like it as much! ^_^

Obsession said: Hey! evil cliffies are bad, ok? Update soon, cause i really wanna know what happens. SESS/KAG stories are the best!!!

Loki: they are bad!  I hate cliffhangers, too!  *she then wonders why she writes them* eek, I dunno!  It's like I can't help myself!  O_O Totally agree about the Sess/Kag stories being the best!  Though I like Kagome/Kouga and Kagome/Naraku stories, too!  Hey, can anybody point me to some Kag/Nar stories?  I've read the couple that have appeared recently on ff.net (gods, you authors are so wonderful!!!), but I.need.more!  :-D

baka deshi said: Interesting...usually I abandon a Sess/Kag story once the "Kagome sees Inu and Kikyou kissing" plot device occurs, but I'm glad I didn't this time. I wasn't expecting him to be betrayed, or Kagome to be attacked like that. By Sesshoumaru, or someone else? The prologue led me to believe Kikyou and Sesshoumaru were working together, which is a very interesting concept if you can make it work in an in-character fashion. Nice descriptions also, although I have to give you the dubious compliment of being the first author I have read who over-describes things ^_^;; There are a few places were I got buried in the adjectives and metaphors and had a hard time figuring out what was going on. (For example: "She was one point in a line, a line that fed into itself, and had no end." was a bit confusing to me...had to read it several times.)
On the whole though, a very interesting beginning. Keep writing, please!

Loki: That one plot line keeps popping up, doesn't it? ^_^ but I guess it still works no matter how many times I read it.  I mean, with Kagome's personality, it's hard to find a way to separate her from her group.  And with Sesshoumaru's personality, she very nearly HAS to be separated from them before she and fluffy have any chance of interacting.  So, I can see its good points, though sometimes they get lost in being recycled so many times.  Of course, every so often someone blows me away completely with how well they present their own version.  Eh, about the over-descriptions, sorry about that!  It happens a lot during the first couple of chapters of most of my stories!  At that point I'm still looking for the right tone to take in my words, and I'm not too comfortable describing the scenes yet.  Hopefully I will improve as the story continues!  ^_^ that line you mentioned?  I was kind of referring back to my own personal belief that Kagome is not only a reincarnation of Kikyou, but of Midoriko as well.  I believe that Kagome carries with her part of Kikyou's soul and part of Midoriko's, while still having her own.  'member when Kanna tried to steal her soul but there was just so much of it?  That's what I'm talking about...anyway, thanks for the review!  You really raised a lot of valid questions!  ^_^

rereissocute said: wow, u have a really god writing style, and i like the way you expressed how they were feeling... there's only ONE problem... EWY could u be anymore descriptive when kagome's gettin slashed?!? lol sry, had to get that out! anyways aaarrgghhh whats gonna happen!? update update update! *rere*

Loki: sorry about that!  hehe.  ^_^ i kinda get into scenes with high angst and gore factors...big fan of horror and slasher movies here!  And I guess that carries over into my writing sometimes...Thanks oodles for taking the time out to read my story!  I hope you like this chapter, too!

Wolf said: hey Loki. i'm wolf. i haven't read any of your other fics yet, but i really do like this one. you seem to be a very talented writer. i haven't made any fics yet, but my friends and me are planning to put some up. good luck Loki. buh-bye.^_^

Loki:  hi Wolf! *waves* Thanks!  I'm pleased you like it so far!  Aside from this, I only have one other Inuyasha fic, but I hope to be doing some more soon!  And hey, once you and your friends put some stories up---drop me a message in a review or something and let me know!  I'll go read them!  Thanks again!  ^_^

Gillia Koruca said: !.!What was THAT!!!!!! Sorry but your gonna have to write more......fast.......really really fast.  Like now!

Loki: Eep!  I'm writing!  I'm writing! :-D I hope this chapter explains a little about the previous one!  thanks for reviewing!

many many MANY thanks to those who took time out of their lives to read and review this story!  I know you didn't have to which makes your comments that much more special to me.  Much love and peace to you all! ^_^

Arigato!

~Loki