Chapter 4

Blackarachnia narrowed her optics. "Why do I doubt that?"

"You think you're pretty smart, don't you?" Tarantulas smirked. "You think you know so much when in reality, you don't know anything. You don't even know who you are."

"I am a Maximal," she raised her head in a sign of pride.

"Oh I know," the scientist responded. "You're a Maximal alright; there's no denying that. I didn't say that you don't know what you are. I said you don't who you are. There's a big difference."

"Do tell," Blackarachnia crossed her arms under her chest and scowled at him.

"I meant that you have no idea who you were before stepping out of that stasis pod on Megatron's ship as a Predacon," a flash of annoyance crossed her features, and Tarantulas smirked. "What? You thought you very born yesterday?"

Yes, she wanted to say, more like reborn, as my true self. But she held her tongue and remained silent.

"You do realize that you had a life before all of this," Tarantulas waved a hand indicating their surroundings, "before the Beast Wars. But you have no clue who you were on Cybertron, do you?"

She had to admit, he had brought up an interesting topic, but she'd never thought about it herself. Blackarachnia tore her gaze away from him and fell into thought. There had to be more to this, she looked up at the Predacon again. Tarantulas didn't do idle chatter or pleasant conversations. She'd just have to keep this going until he revealed what this was really about.

"So?" she casually brushed it off, as if she didn't care at all. "You don't know who I was on Cybertron either. To you, I was just another experiment, another lab rat. You didn't have any personal stake in it."

"Not at first, no," he admitted. "At first, all I was doing was creating a new soldier for the Predacon army. It was only after I discovered that the protoform was female, that I became interested."

"You would!" Blackarachnia shouted in disgust, loosing her calm composure. "You're a sick bastard, Tarantulas, you know that?"

"Say what you will, I've been called worse before," he shrugged. "In any case, I was curious, but unfortunately I didn't have time to look into your memory banks. The shell program was inserted, and they were overridden. I did, however, check your stasis pod. The information was very interesting."

Blackarachnia didn't respond. She felt extremely violated. Tarantulas seemed to know who she was on Cybertron, almost as if he'd known her back then. She prayed she hadn't run into that monster twice in her life.

"No comment, I see," the Predacon turned his head to the side. "Fine, I won't tell you anything, just give you a name: Isis Khmer."

With that, he turned and, with a few swift steps, disappeared into the woods. On a normal occasion, Blackarachnia would have followed him and they would have traded a few punches, or, at the very least, a few insults. This time, she didn't bother, because there really wasn't any point. She wasn't hurt, and Silverbolt would come soon, so she didn't want to worry him for no reason. Since the events of the earlier day, he was a bit more protective than usual. Blackarachnia couldn't say she blamed him; her near-death experienced had scared them both, and she knew how much Silverbolt was afraid of loosing her.

"You called for me, my love?" as if on cue, a shadow of broad wings and talons passed over her, and Silverbolt touched down on the ground. His eagle claws dug into the soil, and within the nanoclick he transformed into robot mode.

Blackarachnia looked up at him and managed a weak smile. "I'm sorry. What did you say?"

The silver transformer raised an eyebrow. "I felt you calling out to me, though I am not sure as to how I knew it."

"I did call for you," she nodded, though her optics weren't focussed on him and her face wore a thoughtful look, "if only with my heart." Blinking twice she finally looked up at him and smiled. "I'll explain later, Rover. Don't worry about it."

"I also felt a strong sense of despair and…fear?" Silverbolt's concerned golden gaze searched her crimson optics. "Beloved, are you alright?"

"I'm much better now," She smiled seductively and wound both arms around his neck. "So what do you say we take the long way back home?

* * * * * * * * * *

It was past 0200 hours, but Blackarachnia still couldn't find sleep. She stayed awake simply staring at the ceiling, her crimson optics aimlessly counting the imperfections in the finish. She shifted her attention to Silverbolt who was lying next to her, but he had been asleep for hours, a serene smile on his face. She had to smile; at least one of them was having a good night. Placing a gentle kiss on his forehead so as not to wake him, she headed out to command.

What's wrong with me? she thought, walking through the corridors. I guess I should know. As much I hate to say it, but that piece of slag was right: I really don't know who I was on Cybertron. But why would this come up now of all times? I mean, look at Silverbolt; he doesn't know about his past either, and it never bothered him. But then, she chuckled to herself, Silverbolt is usually calm and collective about everything. What about Tigertron and Airazor? Have they ever thought about any this? Blackarachnia released a heavy sigh; she felt very alone. Despite what she thought of Airazor, she missed having another female around to talk to.

The thought struck her, and she stopped, her mind running over it for a second time. How could she miss someone she never really knew? Moreover, how could she even miss the company of anther female, when all her life she'd been surrounded by males? Still, Blackarachnia got the distinct feeling of loneliness. Perhaps it was the longing for someone she knew a long time ago, a close friend maybe. There must have been someone like that in her past, because, as Tarantulas had pointed out, she did have a life before the Beast Wars.

Suddenly a wave of throbbing pain crashed down on her. It was as if her mind began to pulsate. She winced, clutching at her temples as the pain spread through her head. Then, like in the morning, her vision blurred, and everything became dark. She head a soft voice and when she looked up, Blackarachnia saw the face of a young woman, probably her own age or perhaps even younger. The female had turquoise optics and wore a broad smile on her face.

"The Commander wants to see you in his office," the woman winked at her. "Something about hacking into the Citadel's mainframe."

She seemed sweet and kind, but Blackarachnia had no idea who she was. She opened her mouth to ask, but instead was surprised to hear herself laughing and said something else entirely. "Doesn't he know by now that all these lectures have no effect on me?"

The woman nodded with another smile. "I guess he should, but I think he enjoys lecturing you, especially knowing how much you hate them."

"Oh poor innocent Dila," Blackarachnia hear herself sigh as the woman missed something very obvious. "I grew up in the military; lectures are my native language."

The other female, apparently called Dila, laughed and rolled her eyes. "Then I suggest you go and get it over with."

Blackarachnia blinked, and the flashback was gone. She found herself once again standing in the corridors of the base. The cold metal walls surrounded her like a block of ice, chilling down to the very core of her spark. She shuttered but continued to walk towards command.