~* Okay, thanks so much for the reviews! I enjoyed them thoroughly, so please do it again? Here is the next part, and it clears a little up, but more will be revealed, fear not. Okay, so review. Thanks!~*
Disclaimer: The characters are not mine. Except for two....I think....okay, whatever, not mine.
He had gotten in the night before and gotten a hotel room. Now, he had to go face the music, face his friends. Or former friends. Or, well, he really didn't know what they were anymore. He grabbed his coat and left the hotel room and traveled the familiar path back to Central Perk and his old apartment building. He shivered in the fall air and stopped when he saw the building. He was across the street. He could see a blonde coming out talking to another woman. Phoebe. Rachel. They looked the same. He didn't move, he didn't bat an eye. They never even looked in his direction, they just kept walking and laughing. He crossed the street and rang the buzzer.
"Hello?"
"Mrs. Reynolds, hi, it's Joey, I forgot my key, can you let me in?" He disguised his voice as well as he could, and if his memory was right, Mrs. Reynolds was half blind anyway. He wanted to at least get into the building so that he could talk to her.
"I thought Monica was whipping you into shape better," Mrs. Reynolds laughed. "Sure honey, here." The door buzzed and opened. What did she mean about Monica whipping him into shape? That sounded suspiciously like a comment one would make about a couple. No way. Her and Joey? No way. Not possible, right? He pushed the door open and slowly ascended the stairs. He came to number 20 and raised his hand to knock. The door swung open right before he did and there she was. She was just as beautiful as he remembered. Hardly anything had changed, well, her hair was a little shorter and layered now, but she was the same. Exactly the same. Except for one thing. His eyes followed her arm down to her hand and holding on tightly was a little girl. A little girl who looked exactly like her, a little girl about two or three.
"Chandler?" Her voice shook and she gasped and her free hand flew to her mouth.
"Mommy?" Mommy. So he was right, she was married and she did have a baby. But who was the husband? Who was she married to?
"Hi Monica," was the only thing he could manage to get out.
in the paper today
tales of war and of waste
But you turn right over to the TV page
Hey now, hey now
don't dream it's over
Monica crossed the hallway and knocked on the door to Joey's apartment. When he appeared he smiled at the little girl and picked her up.
"What's the matter Mon?" He asked when he noticed her pale face.
"Can you take Emily for a few minutes?"
"Why?" Joey peeked around her to the hallway where Chandler was standing with his hands in his pockets. Chandler nearly flinched under the glare that Joey gave him. Joey placed his arm around Monica, but Monica turned and placed a hand on his chest.
"Would you please put Emily down for a nap?"
"Monica," he started.
"Just put her down for a nap in your apartment and then come over to mine." Joey looked from Monica to Chandler and back at Monica again.
"Fine," he responded and left the hallway.
"Come in," Monica said softly holding the door open and Chandler followed her in. Everything looked the same, well, almost. With the exception of the toys and the rest of the evidence that a small child lived there, it all looked the same.
"Emily? Ross let you name your daughter Emily?" Chandler commented trying desperately to lighten the situation. Monica nodded dazed.
"He told me that it was okay, and Rachel said it was okay, so...I always loved the name, and I wanted her to..... Oh God, Chandler, what are you doing here?" So there went the light conversation.
"I broke up with Cindy." He had almost forgotten Cindy, his girlfriend of three years. He had given everything up for her, he had moved across the country for her. He had given up Monica for her. Well, actually Monica had ended it with him, because of Cindy, but that was a whole other story.
"Cindy." Monica's voice was full of venom when she repeated the name. It was a name that had caused a whole lot of heartbreak for a lot of people. The door opened and Joey came in.
"Hi Joey," he replied. Joey moved to Monica's side and slipped a hand into hers for support.
"Why are you here?"
"I'm going to be living in New York again."
"And you wanted to know if you could move back in?" Joey asked. It had been on Chandler's mind, but he could see be Joey's face that it was not an option.
"No, I just wanted to tell you guys that I was back and to see how you were doing."
"To see how we were doing?" Joey spat the words out.
"Joey," Monica put a soothing hand on Joey's arm.
"No, Mon. He leaves without a single look back, he sleeps with that girl, that whore, what was her name?"
"Cindy," Monica supplied wearily.
"That's right, Cindy. He cheats on you with Cindy and then moves all the way to San Francisco with her, without telling us, we had to find out through a note that he left, and now he wants to come back and why? Why Chandler?"
"Joey, I'm sorry," Chandler hung his head in defeat and Joey studied his face.
"That's it? You're sorry? Do you have any idea of the mess you made when you left?"
"Joey, I can't ask for anything more than for you to believe me when I tell you if I could go back and change things I would."
"But you can't," Monica whispered. "I think maybe you should leave." Chandler wanted to argue. He wanted to know if she was married? Who was Emily's father? Was it Joey? Were they together? Then why did he still live across the hall? What had happened in the three years that he had been gone? But the look in both Monica and Joey's told him that they were not in the mood to talk about times past. He stood up.
"Is there anyway that we can talk soon?" Chandler asked. There's some things that I need to clear up."
"I suppose," Monica replied and watched as he walked out of the door like he had three years before.
hey now, hey now
when the world comes in
they come, they come
to build a wall between us
we know they won't win
He walked back to his hotel room and kicked a rock that was in front of him. That had certainly not gone the way that he had hoped. He knew that he didn't deserve for her to forgive him, or Joey, but he had thought, or hoped that they would learn how to forgive and forget. How could they? He thought I can't forget what I did, so why would they? Maybe he could call Phoebe. Ross wouldn't talk to him, because he had hurt his baby sister, and Rachel would take Monica's side automatically, but maybe, maybe Phoebe would listen, and explain to him what had gone on in the three years that he had been in San Francisco. With renewed hope, he changed directions and headed towards Phoebe's apartment. She was home. To his surprise and delight, she was home.
"Chandler?" She asked incredulously.
"Hey Pheebs."
"What are you doing here?"
"Can we talk?"
"Sure," she held the door open wider and let him in.
"I saw Joey and Monica already, they wouldn't talk to me," he reported.
"No, of course not," she answered bluntly. "I really shouldn't be talking to you, but I will. Why are you back? Are you back?"
"Yes, I left Cindy and got here last night," he took his coat off and sat down on her couch.
"You left her? What happened?"
"We weren't...it didn't....we were fighting all the time, we weren't working, if truth be told, we never worked."
"So why'd you leave?"
"I couldn't stay, with Monica angry with me, and everyone hating me. Not that I blamed you of course, I hated me too, but it was if I could make things work between Cindy and myself then, I hadn't screwed up that badly because Cindy and I were meant to be. You know?"
"Sure, if you and Cindy worked out then what you did to Monica wasn't as bad," she said as she stood up and fixed them both drinks.
"No, what I did to Monica was still bad, it was just....it wasn't as bad of a mistake, I guess." Chandler rubbed his temples. Nothing could justify what he had done to Monica. It was unjustifiable, but he had lost everything already, so what did he have to lose really by staying with Cindy and moving with her?
"But it didn't," Phoebe responded sitting back down.
"No, it didn't. But what I really wanted to come talk to you about was what's happened in the three years?" Phoebe shifted uncomfortably in her seat.
"Have you met Emily?"
"Yes, Emily, Monica's daughter," he answered.
"Did you know that Monica and Joey are together?"
"I gathered that." He became sick at the notion of the woman that he still was in love with being in love with his former best friend.
"Ross and Rachel finally worked through all of their crap and got back together." She paused. "Chandler, you left a lot of things for the rest of us to fix."
"That's what Joey said. Like what?"
"Like Monica, and...."
"Is Joey Emily's father?"
"Is that what you think?"
"Yes."
"You should ask Monica that question. That's her question to answer."
"She won't talk to me."
"You hurt her."
"But I didn't mean to. I would take that back, Pheebs, I would change that if I could."
"I'm sure that you would, but you can't." Those were the same words the Monica had said to him. He couldn't go back and change the things that he had done. They were unchangeable. And wishing and if only's weren't going to change those facts.
"Does everyone hate me?"
"You aren't hated, they don't hate you. They're angry, but they don't hate you. Go talk to Monica, alone, and tell her that you are sorry, see what she says." Chandler hugged his friend and put his coat back on.
"Thanks Phoebe."
"Sure thing," she hugged him once more before he left. "If it means anything, I'm glad that you're home."
"That means the world Phoebe." He would go talk to Monica. He would clear this whole thing up. They could never be the way they used to be, but they could be friends at least. He would make her see that they should be friends still. Yes. That would be what he would do.
Now I'm walking again to the beat of a drum
and I'm counting the steps to the door of your heart
only the shadows ahead barely clearing the roof
get to know the feeling of liberation and relief
He found himself back at apartment 20. He stood in front of the green door and played what he should say to her in his head.
"I'm sorry Monica, can we talk?" That wouldn't do. He had tried the whole sorry thing three years before. It hadn't worked then, it probably wouldn't work now. No good.
"Let's talk. Can we talk?" No. That was too afterschool specialish. That wouldn't work either. He raised his hand and knocked on the door.
"Chandler?" Monica answered it looking surprised to see him again.
"Hi Monica, can we talk? We need to talk." Straightforward, to the point. That was the way to go. She seemed to pause for a moment to think and then nodded her head.
"Sure, come in," she held the door open. He stepped into the apartment.
"Where' s Emily?"
"She's with Ross and Rachel at the park."
"Oh."
"What do you want to talk about?" So he wasn't the only one being blunt today.
"I think that we need to talk about what happened."
"I was pretty clear on what happened Chandler. You cheated on me, I broke up with you, and you moved to San Francisco." He wanted to defend himself like he had tried so many times. He hadn't cheated on her, because technically they hadn't been together. He felt like Ross, he felt like yelling we were on a break. But he didn't want to argue with her. He didn't think it was the time. He needed to talk to her first.
"I know, Monica. I know, what happened then, but what about what happened after that?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Emily! And the fact that you're with Joey!"
"That's what you came to talk about?"
"Yes!" They were yelling now.
"That's none of your business," she spat angrily.
"Sure it is."
"How come?"
"What?"
"How is it any of your business?"
"Because I'm still in love with you!" She stopped and they both stood staring at the other waiting for someone to speak.
"You're what?"
"I'm still in love with you. So I want to know. What's going on between with you and Joey? Is he Emily's father?" She paused and thought of the right words to say to him before opening her mouth. Chandler waited on pins and needles as it took what felt like an eternity for her to speak again.
Hey now, hey now
don't dream it's over
hey now, hey now
when the world comes in
they come, they come
to build a wall between us
don't dream it's over
don't ever let them win
~*And because I am that evil, I am going to leave it there. Next chapter, I promise I will clear up exactly what transpired between Monica and Chandler when he left, but first you people have to review for me. Thanks!~*