Author's Note: I got jealous of Freefall having a comedy with ONE more
review than me (normally, I don't care that much, but since they had the
same number of chapters and all, it just bugged me), so I decided to get
off my lazy ass and hurry up with this chapter.
Chapter 11
(Servi: Yeah. The RV is travelling across the earth at a stupidly hazardous speed, while the author is clutching the wheel like a psycho. Oh wait, scratch that, he IS a psycho. Nevermind.)
Striker: WHOOOSH! Nyahah.
Meru: *bolts straight upwards* My mallow sense is tingling!
Greham: What the hell is that supposed to mean?
Meru: Marshmallows! ^_^
Dart: O_o She's able to detect marshmallows when we're going 60 bajillion miles per hour?
Albert: Bajillion is not a number.
Dart: -_- Albert, shut up.
RV: *crashes into a marshmallow* *spirals into air*
Albert: I am currently perplexed by the fact that despite the numerous other objects we must have plowed into of much greater on this trajectory, a marshmallow is somehow enough to send the heavy recreational vehicle skyrocketing.
RV: *goes flying*
Striker: *holding onto the steering wheel as everything spins* Holy mother of the Almighty Bob!
Dart: *not holding onto anything, and is therefore flying around the RV bumping into things* Hey, this is kinda fun.
Lavitz: I think I'm going to hurl...
Meru: *also bumping into things, despite the fact that she could easily use her wings to stabilize herself* WHEE! ^______________________^
Doel: *glaring at everyone from where he has been Velcroed to the wall to prevent him from wreaking havoc in an RV that has passed the speed of sound* Morons.
Lloyd: *flies out the window, where a loud crunching noise is heard*
Striker: Oops. Did I do that?
Shana: *also flies out of window, where she is immediately devoured by a ravenous swarm of gnats*
Greham: Gnats? Are you running out of animals to eat her or something?
Striker: Of course not. Gnats are just creative.
Rayen: Soa preserve us, he's feeling creative.
Striker: -_- Hey, I created YOU when I was feeling creative.
Rayen: Hard to comprehend, isn't it?
Striker: If I weren't afraid to let go of the wheel right now, I'd smack you.
Greham: Shouldn't we have landed by now?
Albert: It is my belief that because of our incredible momentum when striking the offensive ball of sugar-
Meru: MARSHMALLOW!
Albert: Yes... if I may resume?
Meru: *hits the refridgerator* WHEE!
Albert: I'll take that as an affirmative... picking up from where I was interrupted, due to our amazing speed upon impact with the 'marshmallow', I surmise that we must have been hurled to a very high altitude and will probably continue to fall until the acceleration of gravity causes the recreational vehicle to reach terminal velocity in which case we will crash to the ground which will probably result in the death of all present.
Rayen: We don't necessarily need to reach terminal velocity before hitting the ground.
Lavitz: *manages to speak despite the fact that he's trying not to puke* You actually understand what he says?
Rayen: More or less.
Albert: True, but approximating our height, I would express my opinion that it is a very probable possibility.
Rayen: I suppose.
Doel: If I weren't stuck to this @#$%ing wall, I'd smack you both.
Striker: I understood what he said.
All: *ignore*
Striker: .- Sometimes I wonder why I keep you people around.
Haschel: *comes flying out of the bathroom*
Lavitz: What is UP with you and that goddamn bathroom?
All: *gasp*
Lavitz: Oh no...
Meru: FROGGIE STICK! ^________________________^
Striker: Bob, that smile is annoying.
Meru: ^______________________________________________________________________^
Striker: *smacks Meru*
Meru: Meanie.
Striker: Blah blah blah.
Greham: *has managed to get a hold of a window* Hey, I think we may be landing soon.
Miranda: This #$^#ing thing isn't @!@#ing SUPPOSED to @#%^ing land!
Kongol: Kongol got gas.
Lavitz: Oh hell... *heads over to the open window and hurls*
(Servi: Meanwhile, somewhere in France...)
Random French Guy: *gets hit by Lavitz's sidewalk pizza* *falls over* I surrender!
(Servi: Yes, that was pointless and stupid and mean to the French people. Typical something for the author to do.)
Striker: Don't make me sic Aer on you with the dandruff.
(Servi: ...)
Striker: Damn right, boy. Are we gonna hit yet?
Greham: Eh, not yet.
Striker: Screw this. *speeds up the fall, because he's the author and he can*
Miranda: Are you @#$#ing @$#% INSANE?
Striker: Yes. Why do you ask?
Miranda: @#$# %##@ $@$# #$#$ $@%@ #$$# %@#%!
RV: Hey, I get a part in this chapter! *really loud explosion noise* BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
(Servi: The dust settles, but unfortunately for the rest of creation, the author and Dragoons remain unharmed.)
Lavitz: *looks up from where the window once was* What just happened?
Greham: Nevermind that, did the RV just TALK?
Striker: Maybe, but we'll never know. Poor RV went BOOM. Pretty fire, though.
Dart: *wearing this half sane grin* Fiiiiiire...
Striker: I think he hit one too many household appliances...
Greham: Are you telling me that we lost the RV, our only transportation out of here, wherever here IS, and all our food along with it?
Striker: Yep. But it made a cool explosion.
Lavitz: *running off in the background* Stay away from me!
Meru: FROGGIE STICK! *waving the Froggie Stick of Punishment around as she chases Lavitz* You shall be froggiefied!
Greham: So what are we supposed to do now?
Striker: Simple. We live in the wilderness, eating nothing but grass and whatever small furry animals we can find until we go insane from hunger and start cannibalizing each other.
Doel: *is no longer inhibited by Velcro, due to the fact that there is no longer a wall to be Velcroed to* I say we eat him first.
Striker: Pfft, fat chance. I'm the author.
Albert: Speaking of which, couldn't you just use your magic and conjure up enough food for everyone to eat?
Striker: I COULD, but what would be the fun in that?
Greham: Yeah, we'll eat him first.
Striker: Let's go exploring for no reason!
Doel: Or we could not.
Striker: But we may find food! Or cows...
Doel: *eye twitch* COWS? But are there even cows out here?
Striker: We don't even know where here IS. Who's to say there aren't any cows?
Doel: *blink* OK, I'm convinced. We're going exploring. Anyone who objects will suffer a gooey death at my hands. *stomps off*
All: *follow*
Lavitz: Hey, aren't you the one with the rock that's got godly power in it and stuff?
Rayen: Uh, yeah...
Lavitz: So why are you listening to him?
Rayen: Cow Man scares me...
Lavitz: *remembers the burnt carcass incident* Yeah, nevermind.
Shana: *revived and immediately eaten by an okapi*
Greham: What the hell is an okapi?
Albert: An okapi is a hoofed quadraped with a front end resembling that of an antelope and a back end resembling that of a zebra, which is also closely related to the...
Greham: Nevermind.
Lloyd: *whine* I hate this. My feet hurt!
Striker: *shoots Lloyd, revives, stabs Lloyd, revives, impales Lloyd, revives, beats Lloyd into bloody pulp, and revives*
Lloyd: You know, if I worked at it really hard, I could probably hate you.
Striker: Pfft, nobody has to work to hate you. You're such a total loser you do the job for them.
Miranda: Where the $@#% is @%$^ !@#$# lady?
Striker: Who, Rose? I seem to remember her jumping out of the RV with a parachute and yelling something like 'So long, suckers'.
Dart: Figures.
Mysterious Voices: Moooooooo.
Doel: COWS! *starts running blindly into the foliage*
All: *dragged behind the crazed bovine slayer by some unseen force*
Greham: We're doomed.
Striker: Don't you say that enough?
Author's Note: Yay. Done. Shutting up.
Chapter 11
(Servi: Yeah. The RV is travelling across the earth at a stupidly hazardous speed, while the author is clutching the wheel like a psycho. Oh wait, scratch that, he IS a psycho. Nevermind.)
Striker: WHOOOSH! Nyahah.
Meru: *bolts straight upwards* My mallow sense is tingling!
Greham: What the hell is that supposed to mean?
Meru: Marshmallows! ^_^
Dart: O_o She's able to detect marshmallows when we're going 60 bajillion miles per hour?
Albert: Bajillion is not a number.
Dart: -_- Albert, shut up.
RV: *crashes into a marshmallow* *spirals into air*
Albert: I am currently perplexed by the fact that despite the numerous other objects we must have plowed into of much greater on this trajectory, a marshmallow is somehow enough to send the heavy recreational vehicle skyrocketing.
RV: *goes flying*
Striker: *holding onto the steering wheel as everything spins* Holy mother of the Almighty Bob!
Dart: *not holding onto anything, and is therefore flying around the RV bumping into things* Hey, this is kinda fun.
Lavitz: I think I'm going to hurl...
Meru: *also bumping into things, despite the fact that she could easily use her wings to stabilize herself* WHEE! ^______________________^
Doel: *glaring at everyone from where he has been Velcroed to the wall to prevent him from wreaking havoc in an RV that has passed the speed of sound* Morons.
Lloyd: *flies out the window, where a loud crunching noise is heard*
Striker: Oops. Did I do that?
Shana: *also flies out of window, where she is immediately devoured by a ravenous swarm of gnats*
Greham: Gnats? Are you running out of animals to eat her or something?
Striker: Of course not. Gnats are just creative.
Rayen: Soa preserve us, he's feeling creative.
Striker: -_- Hey, I created YOU when I was feeling creative.
Rayen: Hard to comprehend, isn't it?
Striker: If I weren't afraid to let go of the wheel right now, I'd smack you.
Greham: Shouldn't we have landed by now?
Albert: It is my belief that because of our incredible momentum when striking the offensive ball of sugar-
Meru: MARSHMALLOW!
Albert: Yes... if I may resume?
Meru: *hits the refridgerator* WHEE!
Albert: I'll take that as an affirmative... picking up from where I was interrupted, due to our amazing speed upon impact with the 'marshmallow', I surmise that we must have been hurled to a very high altitude and will probably continue to fall until the acceleration of gravity causes the recreational vehicle to reach terminal velocity in which case we will crash to the ground which will probably result in the death of all present.
Rayen: We don't necessarily need to reach terminal velocity before hitting the ground.
Lavitz: *manages to speak despite the fact that he's trying not to puke* You actually understand what he says?
Rayen: More or less.
Albert: True, but approximating our height, I would express my opinion that it is a very probable possibility.
Rayen: I suppose.
Doel: If I weren't stuck to this @#$%ing wall, I'd smack you both.
Striker: I understood what he said.
All: *ignore*
Striker: .- Sometimes I wonder why I keep you people around.
Haschel: *comes flying out of the bathroom*
Lavitz: What is UP with you and that goddamn bathroom?
All: *gasp*
Lavitz: Oh no...
Meru: FROGGIE STICK! ^________________________^
Striker: Bob, that smile is annoying.
Meru: ^______________________________________________________________________^
Striker: *smacks Meru*
Meru: Meanie.
Striker: Blah blah blah.
Greham: *has managed to get a hold of a window* Hey, I think we may be landing soon.
Miranda: This #$^#ing thing isn't @!@#ing SUPPOSED to @#%^ing land!
Kongol: Kongol got gas.
Lavitz: Oh hell... *heads over to the open window and hurls*
(Servi: Meanwhile, somewhere in France...)
Random French Guy: *gets hit by Lavitz's sidewalk pizza* *falls over* I surrender!
(Servi: Yes, that was pointless and stupid and mean to the French people. Typical something for the author to do.)
Striker: Don't make me sic Aer on you with the dandruff.
(Servi: ...)
Striker: Damn right, boy. Are we gonna hit yet?
Greham: Eh, not yet.
Striker: Screw this. *speeds up the fall, because he's the author and he can*
Miranda: Are you @#$#ing @$#% INSANE?
Striker: Yes. Why do you ask?
Miranda: @#$# %##@ $@$# #$#$ $@%@ #$$# %@#%!
RV: Hey, I get a part in this chapter! *really loud explosion noise* BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
(Servi: The dust settles, but unfortunately for the rest of creation, the author and Dragoons remain unharmed.)
Lavitz: *looks up from where the window once was* What just happened?
Greham: Nevermind that, did the RV just TALK?
Striker: Maybe, but we'll never know. Poor RV went BOOM. Pretty fire, though.
Dart: *wearing this half sane grin* Fiiiiiire...
Striker: I think he hit one too many household appliances...
Greham: Are you telling me that we lost the RV, our only transportation out of here, wherever here IS, and all our food along with it?
Striker: Yep. But it made a cool explosion.
Lavitz: *running off in the background* Stay away from me!
Meru: FROGGIE STICK! *waving the Froggie Stick of Punishment around as she chases Lavitz* You shall be froggiefied!
Greham: So what are we supposed to do now?
Striker: Simple. We live in the wilderness, eating nothing but grass and whatever small furry animals we can find until we go insane from hunger and start cannibalizing each other.
Doel: *is no longer inhibited by Velcro, due to the fact that there is no longer a wall to be Velcroed to* I say we eat him first.
Striker: Pfft, fat chance. I'm the author.
Albert: Speaking of which, couldn't you just use your magic and conjure up enough food for everyone to eat?
Striker: I COULD, but what would be the fun in that?
Greham: Yeah, we'll eat him first.
Striker: Let's go exploring for no reason!
Doel: Or we could not.
Striker: But we may find food! Or cows...
Doel: *eye twitch* COWS? But are there even cows out here?
Striker: We don't even know where here IS. Who's to say there aren't any cows?
Doel: *blink* OK, I'm convinced. We're going exploring. Anyone who objects will suffer a gooey death at my hands. *stomps off*
All: *follow*
Lavitz: Hey, aren't you the one with the rock that's got godly power in it and stuff?
Rayen: Uh, yeah...
Lavitz: So why are you listening to him?
Rayen: Cow Man scares me...
Lavitz: *remembers the burnt carcass incident* Yeah, nevermind.
Shana: *revived and immediately eaten by an okapi*
Greham: What the hell is an okapi?
Albert: An okapi is a hoofed quadraped with a front end resembling that of an antelope and a back end resembling that of a zebra, which is also closely related to the...
Greham: Nevermind.
Lloyd: *whine* I hate this. My feet hurt!
Striker: *shoots Lloyd, revives, stabs Lloyd, revives, impales Lloyd, revives, beats Lloyd into bloody pulp, and revives*
Lloyd: You know, if I worked at it really hard, I could probably hate you.
Striker: Pfft, nobody has to work to hate you. You're such a total loser you do the job for them.
Miranda: Where the $@#% is @%$^ !@#$# lady?
Striker: Who, Rose? I seem to remember her jumping out of the RV with a parachute and yelling something like 'So long, suckers'.
Dart: Figures.
Mysterious Voices: Moooooooo.
Doel: COWS! *starts running blindly into the foliage*
All: *dragged behind the crazed bovine slayer by some unseen force*
Greham: We're doomed.
Striker: Don't you say that enough?
Author's Note: Yay. Done. Shutting up.