Title: The Misadventures of Self-Appreciation Boy and Bondage Boy!

Rating: R

Warnings for this chapter: Cursing, YAOI!, and general stupidity.

Summary: It's the second installment in the Misadventures of Self-Appreciation Boy and Bondage Boy!

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The Misadventures of Self-Appreciation Boy and his sidekick, Bondage Boy!

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Hello, reader! As you can see, we didn't get canned!

"Thanks to my good looks!" Bondage Boy yelled.

"No, because of your incredible uke powers!" Self-Appreciation Boy yelled back.

Oh go fuck and make up! You two always do this! I'm outta here! Melissa can do her own narrating!

Oh crap! Now not only is it stupid, it's self-insertion too! …Better start narrating.

Ahem. Yeah! And Self-Appreciation Boy started fucking Bondage Boy out in the open and…

"WHAT?!" Both shrieked.

Oh. Better stick to the script! Sorry!

Gimme my job back! I wasn't serious Melissa!

Awwww!! That's not fair!

Yes it is! Get back into your italics!!

Damn you.

Anyway…It was once a again, a very sunny day, because nothing BAD ever happens on rainy days.

Our favourite superheroes were relaxing, and playing a game of 'Who Can Come Up With the Biggest Insult'. SO far, Self-Appreciation Boy was winning.

"I'm winning! BWAHAHAH!!"

Bondage Boy sighed and gave him the slanty-eyed look. "I sometimes wonder if you're a few crayons short of a box…"

"Is that supposed to make me upset?" Self-Appreciation Boy sneered.

Bondage Boy grinned. He fell into the trap. Now he would get some lovin'! "No…the only colours that are missing are the ugly ones."

Very smooth, Dark. That'll get anyone bedded.

The Narrator rolled her eyes, sighing.

Melissa. I told you to stop.

…see if YOU get a pay raise.

…I love you Melissa.

That's what I thought.

"Hey! We're the stars of the story!" Self-Appreciation Boy yelled.

I-Make-Up-For-My-Inadequacies-By-Being-A-Fucktard Guy scoffed. "No…I am…now where'd Gaia get to? Hmm.."

He wandered off, looking for his semi-in-denial partner.

Obligatory Cute Thing wandered up. "Kurikurikuriiiiiiii!!"

"What is it, Cute Thing? Is Timmy stuck in a well?!" Self-Appreciation Boy asked frantically.

"…uhm, Celtic, honey…we don't KNOW any Timmies." Bondage Boy said, sighing.

"Ohhh…we don't? I thought we did…" Self-Appreciation Boy tilted his head.

Bondage Boy blinked. "Oh! A blond moment…wait! I never got to rub up sexily against you!"

Just then…the Crime-tastic alarm went off!!

"…crime-tastic? Damn, Melissa! You suck!"

Only on the weekends, honey. NOW GET BACK TO THE SCRIPT! I slave over a hot keyboard all day for this..and I get NO respect…

Self-Appreciation Boy scoffed. "Oh yeah, a REAL hot keyboard. All you do is look at yaoi hentai of Dark and I!"

"She has yaoi hentai?! But she's only—mppph!!"

And suddenly, Bondage Boy was attacked with the Ball Gag of Silence!

"Lemurlemurlemuuuuur!!"

Self-Appreciation Boy blinked. "Are those supposed to be lemurs?"

Yes. Melissa doesn't know what sound lemurs make, and she's been playing Pokemon obsessively.

MATE WITH BURAKKU, ERUFU [1]!! MAAAAAAAATE!!!!!

Bondage Boy's eyes widened. "MMMHH!!"

Self-Appreciation Boy flushed. "Stupid pervy fangirl…although I would like to mate with him…like right…GYAH!!!" He screamed.

For, right in front of him, was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

She had long, flowing, silky, glittery, beautiful, perfect, dazzling burnt sienna hair. Her perfect ocean blue eyes showed all of her intelligence, depth, and smartness [2]. And they were also flowing, silky, glittery, beautiful and perfect.

She had perfect 2532835348ZZZZZZ breasts that stuck out proudly from her chest, without causing her back problems. She wore a beautiful, perfect, dazzling black tube top, and a pair of the shortest shorts, showing off her very shapely legs.

OH DEAR GOD NO!!!! IT CAN'T BE!!!!

"Tee hee hee! Hello, Self-Appreciation Boy! My name is [insert random name like Blaze, Fyre, Princess, or random adjective here]."

Bondage Boy pulled the gag out of his mouth. "YOU!! YOU'RE THE EVIL MISTRESS MARY SUE!!!"

Suddenly, she turned into an evil snake like monster and turned to Bondage Boy. "Yessssssss…and I have your partner enssssssssssared in my trap!!"

Self-Appreciation Boy WAS ensnared in her beauty. Because that was the SPECIAL power of Mistress Mary Sue…

"Oh no! She can turn gay guys…STRAIGHT!!!" Bondage Boy shrieked. "NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! CELTIC!!!!!" He dove for his partner.

But it was too late for; Mistress Mary Sue had already taken him to her Straightness of DOOM cave.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! CELTIC!!!!!!! WHYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!" Bondage Boy yelled to the sky, breaking down.

And Bondage Boy sobbed for his partner…but then he had an idea.

"I'll get him back! Mary Sue's have a weakness!! …I WILL GET MY ELF-BOY BACK YOU BITCH!!!!!" He yelled.

…

WHAT?!?! THERE'S NO MORE?!?! NOOOO!!! MELISSA!!!!!

…it's a cliffhanger! That's what all the other fics do, right?

DYAAAAAH!!!! And, the Narrator choked the Authoress until she WROTE MORE!

"WHAT?! YOU LEAVE IT THERE?!?!" Bondage Boy shrieked. "YOU'RE GONNA LEAVE MY POOR ELF-BOY IN HER STRAIGHT CLUTCHES UNTIL YOU THINK OF SOME MORE STUPID HUMOUR?!?!"

DYAAAH!! And the authoress RAN AWAY!

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Yes. It ends there. I know this chapter is shorter than the other one…but the next one will be the end of this episode! And after that…well, I don't know what!

[1] Erufu = Elf , Burakku = Black. Meaning, I have Pokemon named after Duel Monsters. YAY FOR ME!

[2] Meaning, they were incredibly shallow.

…Review/compliment/complain/flame…I LOVE HEARING FROM YOOOOOOOOOOOU!