::Between Love and Hate::
Himura Kawaii
Chapter Eight
*** Disclaimers apply... Blah blah. RK's not mine. Hail the Great Watsuki- sama. The soong too! Incubus owns it. I'm now a college stud, but still poor!!.... Don't sue me! ^_^
Kaori had asked Soujirou to take her home. Sou willingly obliged and not a word was said on the way home. He sensed that something had happened to make Kaori feel this bad.
After Sou pulled up in front of the Kamiya house, he looked at Kaori, his smiling eyes unusually serious.
"Look, Kaori, I know you think she's way better than you and that you can't compete or something." Sou paused and started to smile.
"But Kaori, I want you to know that for us, no one else can come close. Screw Kenji if he can't see that."
Kaori returned the grin and hugged Soujirou tightly. "Ne, Sou, no one can compare to you either."
Sou wiped the tears that were spilling from Kaori's eyes and returned to his normal, cheerful self. "Get some sleep now. Snow Princesses shouldn't tire themselves out." He joked.
Soujirou got out and opened Kaori's door for her and they walked towards their gate. "Thanks Sou. you really came through for me." Kaori gratefully said as they hugged again.
"It's nothing. We're friends. Friends always come through for each other." He smiled and curtseyed. "Oyasumi nasai!"
Kaori watched Soujirou's car pull back as he honked goodbye.
Without stopping to think, she let out the flood of tears that were threatening to fall a lot earlier.
Later that night, or early morning, after Kenji dropped Tomoe off at her hotel, he drove around their village. He couldn't think straight, he felt he had to do something to make things right. He wouldn't be able to sleep that night if he didn't talk to Kaori.
He and Tomoe had somehow come upon the conclusion that their relationship was really over. Tomoe didn't want to be in a relationship with a man who was in love with someone else, no matter how much she loved Kenji. It was unfair for her, unfair to Kenji and unfair to Kaori.
Kenji wanted so much to believe that letting go of Tomoe was the right thing to do. He let go of something huge in his life, for something that was uncertain and unknown to him.
Somehow, he felt, even at 1:30 in the morning, Kaori would still be awake. He parked his car in front of the empty lot beside Kaori's house. He suddenly laughed quietly when he remembered that he didn't know which was Kaori's bedroom.
"Man." Kenji kicked a stray pebble as he contemplated on what to do next.
He couldn't just make a wild guess and throw a pebble at one of the windows. That would be plain stupid. Who knows if it was her parents' room he was aiming for?
He fished his cellphone out of his pocket and hit the speed dial button of Arashi's number.
"Kenji?" Arashi's puzzled voice sounded over the phone. "What's up, man? Anything wrong?"
"No. not really. Well, er." Kenji felt dumb at doing this. "Do you happen to know which window in the house is Kaori's? I, uh, need to, uh-"
"Oh, is that all?" Arashi's knowing voice immediately lightened. "Her window's on the second floor with the smaller terrace. Right below the big one. Be careful, though, her parents' bedroom is directly above her room."
"Thanks man!" Kenji felt relieved at Arashi's help. "Talk to you soon."
"Ja."
Kenji put his phone back and stared at the window above him. he could easily climb to it, but then what to do after that?
Will she let him in? Only one way to find out, he thought. Kenji started to climb and pretty soon, he was on the terrace.
"I could be arrested for doing this." Kenji muttered to himself. Good thing the Kamiyas haven't thought of putting security cameras all over their house yet.
Kenji peeped through the sliding doors to see Kaori's back on the door. She was under her covers and her hair was all over.
"There's really something about her." Kenji whispered.
He gently knocked on the glass and surprisingly, Kaori immediately turned around and snapped out of sleep.
"Whaaa?!" She got out of bed and ran towards the sliding doors, not willing to believe that there's a person there. "Kenji?!"
Kenji blushed hotly, realizing that it was a REALLY STUPID IDEA in the first place. What would he tell her? He was strolling along and he came upon her beautifully made balcony? "Er. can I talk to you?"
Kaori was still stunned but let him in and made him sit on the carpeted floor. "What do you want? Why aren't you with your girlfriend?" She had said the world 'girlfriend' in a way that it seemed to leave a bad taste in her mouth.
"She's not my girlfriend." Kenji vehemently denied. "Actually she-"
"Yeah, whatever." Kaori interrupted him. "What do you want, Himura?"
Kenji took a deep breath and spoke.
"I want you, Kaori."
Kaori looked up, amazed.
"Is that too much to ask?" Kenji seemed to have regained his courage.
Kaori wanted so badly to tell him it was what she wanted too, but pride got in the way.
"What about Tomoe?" She hotly asked him.
"What about her?" Kenji was confused.
"What? You think you could kiss her like that and then go to my house and tell me you want me? That's funny Kenji." Kaori exploded, unable to keep her jealousy intact.
"Are you jealous? And, wait, were you peeping on us?!" Kenji exploded too. "It wasn't what it seemed, Kaori, plea-"
Kaori laughed, the same sarcastic laugh she used on Kenji too often. "What? You think I'm jealous? WHY should I be JEALOUS? I DON'T give a DAMN on what the hell it is that you do with your life. In fact, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT YOU AT ALL!!! Why don't you just get the hell out of my life?!"
That wasn't right. No, that wasn't right at all. Kaori immediately thought.
Kenji felt his heart being pounded into a thousand tiny pieces. He quickly stood up and went over to where he came from.
"Where are you going?" Kaori indignantly asked, a dreaded feeling sinking in.
Kenji turned to look at her, violet eyes facing blue ones. "I think I got my answer so I'm going to leave now. Don't worry, I won't be in your way anymore."
He left, leaving Kaori shivering in the coldness of the snowy air.
Not right, so not right. Kaori thought, unable to find the strength to stand up and close the glass doors.
I haven't felt the way I feel today
In so long it's hard for me to specify
I'm beginning to notice how much this feels
Like a waking limb, pins and needles, nice to know you
Goodbye, nice to know you
Goodbye, nice to know you
So could it be that it has been there all along?
Nice to Know You
Icubus
Kenji wasn't in class when Monday came by.
Nor was he in on Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday.
Friday came and the gumi was really worried.
Kaori was agitated. She was also really sorry for what she had said to him. She was really sorry for all the pain she had caused him, for all the harsh words she had said.
She was so so sorry. For all the time she wasted, and for all the moments that had passed.
If only she could have him back.
"Where is he?" Misao asked Kaori for the Nth time.
"I don't know." Kaori answered irritably. "I tried calling his house, but their housekeeper kept saying that he was out on some important affair. I don't know what to do anymore."
"You shouldn't have pushed him away. Now he's out of reach and you're fretting." Meimi answered rather reproachfully.
Kaori almost cried. "I know that too."
"Stop it foxy, you shouldn't blame Kaori for all of these." Shino interjected.
"Yeah, and who was it that advised Kenji into bringing his ex-girlfriend to the dance?" Meimi shot back.
"Quiet, you guys." Soujirou frowned at them. "This is no time to fight over whose fault it is."
Arashi agreed with Sou. "Yeah, Sou's right. We should just wait. If Kenji wants to be back, he will be back."
Kaori quietly slipped out of the coffee shop and rushed to her car.
"Hey, busu, can you come with me to the mall?" Yoshi said as Kaori stepped into their house.
Kaori stared blankly at Yoshi as she tried to comprehend what he was saying. Without thinking, she said yes.
"Yatta!" Yoshi scratched his head, took his coat and they went outside again. "Is there something wrong with you busu? You seem, I don't know, a bit off today."
"Nothing." Kaori automatically answered without thinking.
"Okay. if you say so."
As they were leaving the mall with Yoshi's packages, they bumped into Tsubame. Kaori absently waited as the two talked. She suddenly dropped everything she was carrying when she saw a familiar red-headed guy behind the girl Yoshi was talking to.
"Kenji?" Kaori blinked as if to clear her vision.
Yoshi and Tsubame looked at Kaori, who was paling and then to Kenji who looked trapped.
Tsubame spoke first. "Ne, Kaori-san, this is my niichan, Kenji." She held his hand to present to Kaori.
Kaori nodded at Tsubame, still looking at Kenji.
"Um, Tsubame-chan, we should get going now." Kenji took her hand and led her away. "It was nice seeing you again, Yoshi!"
Before anyone else could say a word, Kenji and Tsubame were gone.
"What was that all about?" Yoshi turned to Kaori, in search for an answer. "I thought you knew Kenji was Tsubame's brother?"
"I. I didn't know. " Kaori stated simply. "I didn't know."
A week had passed and Kenji still didn't come to school. Kaori couldn't understand it. Why was he not attending classes? Why wasn't he returning any of their calls?
Why did he have to come into her life and leave when she needed him the most?
Yoshi came barging into the kitchen, glaring at Kaori.
"Happy now?"
"What?" Kaori asked Yoshi.
"I said, are you happy now?" Yoshi angrily repeated. "You got what you wanted, didn't you?"
"I don't think I know what you're talking about."
"Oh you do." He answered bitterly. "You know very well what I'm talking about. They're leaving as of now, if you want to know."
Panic seeped through Kaori's being. "Who? Who's leaving? Where?"
Yoshi raised an eyebrow. "You mean to tell me you didn't know?"
"Stop playing word games Yoshi. What the hell are you talking about?"
"Tsubame and Kenji. She said goodbye earlier. She said her niichan told her that they will go back to their parents in Kyoto now that their newly established business here in Tokyo is stable. He said there was no more reason for them to stay."
Kaori sat, frozen.
"She left me Kaori. And it's all because of you! Kenji had told her they were staying, but now, because of you, he will have to leave and Tsubame has to go with him!" Yoshi looked almost close to tears.
"I drove him away." Kaori whispered.
"Then bring him back, goddamnit!" Yoshi pounded the tabletop. "For once, Kaori, be the smart girl you claim to be!"
Kaori shrugged listlessly. "Why don't we just let them go, Yoshi?"
"I can't allow you to do that. The only way I could bring Tsubame back is if you bring Kenji back. Help me out, Kaori! I'm really desperate here." Yoshi pleaded.
Kaori felt a sense of hope rush back to her.
Maybe Arashi was right, it was never too late.
"Okay, let's go."
*** Ah! :) Whaddya think? I hope it was good too. ^_^
I'm sorry Tomoe only had to make a quick appearance. I was thinking that maybe she could be the one to bring Kaori back to Kenji, but that's just a bit. cliché.? I don't know. it's just really kinda martyr-like for you to let go of your man and push him into the arms of another. Not realistic, I guess. ^_^
As for the slow pace. I just wanted to dwell on Kaori's loss. I mean, I wanted to capture all of their emotions and such. I hope you guys don't mind. :)
Sorry if I'm kinda lethargic. I guess you could say I'm having a bad night. But I hope you guys are having better ones!
Thanks for all those who have read this and reviewed. all those who texted me and stuff. thank you very much, minna! Writing is my passion, and you guys make me feel like I'm doing something right. ^_^
Mia from Ateneo. One big fight!!! ^_^ UP is with AdMU!!! Hehehe.. Elaine. thanks for reading!! I can't reply cuz I have no more load. huhu.
Major papers are flooding me so it might take a little longer for me to post the last ::sniff sniff:: Chappie.. so I hope you guys can bear with me.. Love y'all!
Himura Kawaii
Chapter Eight
*** Disclaimers apply... Blah blah. RK's not mine. Hail the Great Watsuki- sama. The soong too! Incubus owns it. I'm now a college stud, but still poor!!.... Don't sue me! ^_^
Kaori had asked Soujirou to take her home. Sou willingly obliged and not a word was said on the way home. He sensed that something had happened to make Kaori feel this bad.
After Sou pulled up in front of the Kamiya house, he looked at Kaori, his smiling eyes unusually serious.
"Look, Kaori, I know you think she's way better than you and that you can't compete or something." Sou paused and started to smile.
"But Kaori, I want you to know that for us, no one else can come close. Screw Kenji if he can't see that."
Kaori returned the grin and hugged Soujirou tightly. "Ne, Sou, no one can compare to you either."
Sou wiped the tears that were spilling from Kaori's eyes and returned to his normal, cheerful self. "Get some sleep now. Snow Princesses shouldn't tire themselves out." He joked.
Soujirou got out and opened Kaori's door for her and they walked towards their gate. "Thanks Sou. you really came through for me." Kaori gratefully said as they hugged again.
"It's nothing. We're friends. Friends always come through for each other." He smiled and curtseyed. "Oyasumi nasai!"
Kaori watched Soujirou's car pull back as he honked goodbye.
Without stopping to think, she let out the flood of tears that were threatening to fall a lot earlier.
Later that night, or early morning, after Kenji dropped Tomoe off at her hotel, he drove around their village. He couldn't think straight, he felt he had to do something to make things right. He wouldn't be able to sleep that night if he didn't talk to Kaori.
He and Tomoe had somehow come upon the conclusion that their relationship was really over. Tomoe didn't want to be in a relationship with a man who was in love with someone else, no matter how much she loved Kenji. It was unfair for her, unfair to Kenji and unfair to Kaori.
Kenji wanted so much to believe that letting go of Tomoe was the right thing to do. He let go of something huge in his life, for something that was uncertain and unknown to him.
Somehow, he felt, even at 1:30 in the morning, Kaori would still be awake. He parked his car in front of the empty lot beside Kaori's house. He suddenly laughed quietly when he remembered that he didn't know which was Kaori's bedroom.
"Man." Kenji kicked a stray pebble as he contemplated on what to do next.
He couldn't just make a wild guess and throw a pebble at one of the windows. That would be plain stupid. Who knows if it was her parents' room he was aiming for?
He fished his cellphone out of his pocket and hit the speed dial button of Arashi's number.
"Kenji?" Arashi's puzzled voice sounded over the phone. "What's up, man? Anything wrong?"
"No. not really. Well, er." Kenji felt dumb at doing this. "Do you happen to know which window in the house is Kaori's? I, uh, need to, uh-"
"Oh, is that all?" Arashi's knowing voice immediately lightened. "Her window's on the second floor with the smaller terrace. Right below the big one. Be careful, though, her parents' bedroom is directly above her room."
"Thanks man!" Kenji felt relieved at Arashi's help. "Talk to you soon."
"Ja."
Kenji put his phone back and stared at the window above him. he could easily climb to it, but then what to do after that?
Will she let him in? Only one way to find out, he thought. Kenji started to climb and pretty soon, he was on the terrace.
"I could be arrested for doing this." Kenji muttered to himself. Good thing the Kamiyas haven't thought of putting security cameras all over their house yet.
Kenji peeped through the sliding doors to see Kaori's back on the door. She was under her covers and her hair was all over.
"There's really something about her." Kenji whispered.
He gently knocked on the glass and surprisingly, Kaori immediately turned around and snapped out of sleep.
"Whaaa?!" She got out of bed and ran towards the sliding doors, not willing to believe that there's a person there. "Kenji?!"
Kenji blushed hotly, realizing that it was a REALLY STUPID IDEA in the first place. What would he tell her? He was strolling along and he came upon her beautifully made balcony? "Er. can I talk to you?"
Kaori was still stunned but let him in and made him sit on the carpeted floor. "What do you want? Why aren't you with your girlfriend?" She had said the world 'girlfriend' in a way that it seemed to leave a bad taste in her mouth.
"She's not my girlfriend." Kenji vehemently denied. "Actually she-"
"Yeah, whatever." Kaori interrupted him. "What do you want, Himura?"
Kenji took a deep breath and spoke.
"I want you, Kaori."
Kaori looked up, amazed.
"Is that too much to ask?" Kenji seemed to have regained his courage.
Kaori wanted so badly to tell him it was what she wanted too, but pride got in the way.
"What about Tomoe?" She hotly asked him.
"What about her?" Kenji was confused.
"What? You think you could kiss her like that and then go to my house and tell me you want me? That's funny Kenji." Kaori exploded, unable to keep her jealousy intact.
"Are you jealous? And, wait, were you peeping on us?!" Kenji exploded too. "It wasn't what it seemed, Kaori, plea-"
Kaori laughed, the same sarcastic laugh she used on Kenji too often. "What? You think I'm jealous? WHY should I be JEALOUS? I DON'T give a DAMN on what the hell it is that you do with your life. In fact, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT YOU AT ALL!!! Why don't you just get the hell out of my life?!"
That wasn't right. No, that wasn't right at all. Kaori immediately thought.
Kenji felt his heart being pounded into a thousand tiny pieces. He quickly stood up and went over to where he came from.
"Where are you going?" Kaori indignantly asked, a dreaded feeling sinking in.
Kenji turned to look at her, violet eyes facing blue ones. "I think I got my answer so I'm going to leave now. Don't worry, I won't be in your way anymore."
He left, leaving Kaori shivering in the coldness of the snowy air.
Not right, so not right. Kaori thought, unable to find the strength to stand up and close the glass doors.
I haven't felt the way I feel today
In so long it's hard for me to specify
I'm beginning to notice how much this feels
Like a waking limb, pins and needles, nice to know you
Goodbye, nice to know you
Goodbye, nice to know you
So could it be that it has been there all along?
Nice to Know You
Icubus
Kenji wasn't in class when Monday came by.
Nor was he in on Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday.
Friday came and the gumi was really worried.
Kaori was agitated. She was also really sorry for what she had said to him. She was really sorry for all the pain she had caused him, for all the harsh words she had said.
She was so so sorry. For all the time she wasted, and for all the moments that had passed.
If only she could have him back.
"Where is he?" Misao asked Kaori for the Nth time.
"I don't know." Kaori answered irritably. "I tried calling his house, but their housekeeper kept saying that he was out on some important affair. I don't know what to do anymore."
"You shouldn't have pushed him away. Now he's out of reach and you're fretting." Meimi answered rather reproachfully.
Kaori almost cried. "I know that too."
"Stop it foxy, you shouldn't blame Kaori for all of these." Shino interjected.
"Yeah, and who was it that advised Kenji into bringing his ex-girlfriend to the dance?" Meimi shot back.
"Quiet, you guys." Soujirou frowned at them. "This is no time to fight over whose fault it is."
Arashi agreed with Sou. "Yeah, Sou's right. We should just wait. If Kenji wants to be back, he will be back."
Kaori quietly slipped out of the coffee shop and rushed to her car.
"Hey, busu, can you come with me to the mall?" Yoshi said as Kaori stepped into their house.
Kaori stared blankly at Yoshi as she tried to comprehend what he was saying. Without thinking, she said yes.
"Yatta!" Yoshi scratched his head, took his coat and they went outside again. "Is there something wrong with you busu? You seem, I don't know, a bit off today."
"Nothing." Kaori automatically answered without thinking.
"Okay. if you say so."
As they were leaving the mall with Yoshi's packages, they bumped into Tsubame. Kaori absently waited as the two talked. She suddenly dropped everything she was carrying when she saw a familiar red-headed guy behind the girl Yoshi was talking to.
"Kenji?" Kaori blinked as if to clear her vision.
Yoshi and Tsubame looked at Kaori, who was paling and then to Kenji who looked trapped.
Tsubame spoke first. "Ne, Kaori-san, this is my niichan, Kenji." She held his hand to present to Kaori.
Kaori nodded at Tsubame, still looking at Kenji.
"Um, Tsubame-chan, we should get going now." Kenji took her hand and led her away. "It was nice seeing you again, Yoshi!"
Before anyone else could say a word, Kenji and Tsubame were gone.
"What was that all about?" Yoshi turned to Kaori, in search for an answer. "I thought you knew Kenji was Tsubame's brother?"
"I. I didn't know. " Kaori stated simply. "I didn't know."
A week had passed and Kenji still didn't come to school. Kaori couldn't understand it. Why was he not attending classes? Why wasn't he returning any of their calls?
Why did he have to come into her life and leave when she needed him the most?
Yoshi came barging into the kitchen, glaring at Kaori.
"Happy now?"
"What?" Kaori asked Yoshi.
"I said, are you happy now?" Yoshi angrily repeated. "You got what you wanted, didn't you?"
"I don't think I know what you're talking about."
"Oh you do." He answered bitterly. "You know very well what I'm talking about. They're leaving as of now, if you want to know."
Panic seeped through Kaori's being. "Who? Who's leaving? Where?"
Yoshi raised an eyebrow. "You mean to tell me you didn't know?"
"Stop playing word games Yoshi. What the hell are you talking about?"
"Tsubame and Kenji. She said goodbye earlier. She said her niichan told her that they will go back to their parents in Kyoto now that their newly established business here in Tokyo is stable. He said there was no more reason for them to stay."
Kaori sat, frozen.
"She left me Kaori. And it's all because of you! Kenji had told her they were staying, but now, because of you, he will have to leave and Tsubame has to go with him!" Yoshi looked almost close to tears.
"I drove him away." Kaori whispered.
"Then bring him back, goddamnit!" Yoshi pounded the tabletop. "For once, Kaori, be the smart girl you claim to be!"
Kaori shrugged listlessly. "Why don't we just let them go, Yoshi?"
"I can't allow you to do that. The only way I could bring Tsubame back is if you bring Kenji back. Help me out, Kaori! I'm really desperate here." Yoshi pleaded.
Kaori felt a sense of hope rush back to her.
Maybe Arashi was right, it was never too late.
"Okay, let's go."
*** Ah! :) Whaddya think? I hope it was good too. ^_^
I'm sorry Tomoe only had to make a quick appearance. I was thinking that maybe she could be the one to bring Kaori back to Kenji, but that's just a bit. cliché.? I don't know. it's just really kinda martyr-like for you to let go of your man and push him into the arms of another. Not realistic, I guess. ^_^
As for the slow pace. I just wanted to dwell on Kaori's loss. I mean, I wanted to capture all of their emotions and such. I hope you guys don't mind. :)
Sorry if I'm kinda lethargic. I guess you could say I'm having a bad night. But I hope you guys are having better ones!
Thanks for all those who have read this and reviewed. all those who texted me and stuff. thank you very much, minna! Writing is my passion, and you guys make me feel like I'm doing something right. ^_^
Mia from Ateneo. One big fight!!! ^_^ UP is with AdMU!!! Hehehe.. Elaine. thanks for reading!! I can't reply cuz I have no more load. huhu.
Major papers are flooding me so it might take a little longer for me to post the last ::sniff sniff:: Chappie.. so I hope you guys can bear with me.. Love y'all!