::Between Love and Hate::
Himura Kawaii
Chapter Nine
*** Disclaimers apply... Blah blah. RK's not mine. Hail the Great Watsuki- sama. I'm now a college stud, but still poor!!.... Don't sue me! ^_^
"So where exactly are we going?" Yoshi closed the door on his side of the car and glanced at Kaori questioningly.
Kaori stared unseeingly into the driveway. She wanted to take Kenji back. She wanted him back more than anything.
"I don't know." Kaori bit her lip and closed her eyes for a while. "Maybe we should try checking out his house first, and then see what we're going to do from there."
"Okay, let's go."
"Himura-san and his sister left thirty minutes ago, I'm sorry." The maid shrugged apologetically at them, seeing Kaori's face almost crumple.
Kaori clutched her arms tightly to keep herself from falling down the floor.
Why is this happening to me?
"Oh." Kaori nodded absently.
Yoshi asked for their flight information and politely thanked the housekeeper.
"C'mon. Let's go, Kaori." Yoshi urged Kaori, who seemed to be stuck on the steps. "Kaori, come on." 1
Kaori mechanically followed Kaori back to the car. Snow was falling around them, making Kaori's slow steps pudgy.
"Where to?" Yoshi almost shouted at Kaori's ear. He had asked that question almost three times already.
Kaori shook her head. "Can we just go home?" She asked quietly.
Yoshi grabbed Kaori's arm and shook her. "What the hell is wrong with you Kaori? Where's the girl who knew how to get what she wants?! Talk to me Kaori! Everything's at stake here!"
Kaori looked at Yoshi straight in the eye and sighed.
"Please, Yoshi? I just want to give up and go home." Kaori choked.
"No, Kaori. We have to go now."
Kaori shook her head and ran a hand through her hair. "What? Suppose we reach them, what do I tell him? Do you honestly think that what I tell him could make him stay?!" Kaori slammed her hands on the wheel.
"Shut up and drive Kaori. Whatever happens, at least you can say you did something to make him stay." Yoshi lectured Kaori furiously and continued.
"You lost Arashi. There was nothing you can do about that. But there IS something you can do about Kenji."
"Come on, Kaori. Give him a reason to stay."
Kaori nodded and without a word, she gunned the engine and started for the airport.
Somehow, she couldn't shake off the feeling that this was going to be a long and unfruitful ride.
As they reached the airport, Kaori and Yoshi hurried towards the schedules and learned that Kenji and Tsuabame's flight was already boarding. Yoshi, knowing that they can't go in that area, tried to shout for Tsubame's name when he saw her in the line.
Tsubame turned around quickly and looked for the source of the voice. A grin spread on her face as she let go of her bag and clutched Kenji's shirtsleeve.
"Look, nii-chan! It's Yoshi! And Kaori-niichan's with him!" Tsubame got out of the line and ran towards Yoshi.
Kenji instantly looked up, his features brightened at the sight of Kaori and dimmed almost immediately.
He stared at Kaori, not knowing what to do. In the midst of all the people and the rush, the world for them seemed to keep still.
Kaori was amazed she even found the strength to meet Kenji halfway.
As soon as they were face to face, Kaori looked intently at Kenji.
She was trying to memorize his features, his laughing eyes that seemed to be haggard now, and his red hair, everything about him. She wanted so badly to remember, in case she wouldn't be seeing him again.
How could I have missed it before?
How could I have been so stupid?
"Hey." Kenji greeted her tonelessly.
"Hey." Kaori nodded awkwardly. "So you're leaving, huh?"
Kenji shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so." He seemed distracted by the line that was piling up now.
Kaori traced the floor with the toes of her sneakers. "You didn't even say goodbye." She kept her eyes glued to the floor, not knowing what to say and how to say it.
"There's nothing more left for us to do here. Kyoto is our home." Kenji stated simply.
Kaori could feel desperation seeping in. "But you can't leave." She argued weakly. "What about Yoshi and Tsubame? Yoshi needs Tsubame, she's made him better."
Kenji smiled almost bitterly.
Come on, Kaori, just say the word and I'll stay.
"Well, they're both still young, don't you think? I think Yoshi can wait, and so can Tsubame. She can always return to him."
Kaori nodded dumbly, biting her lip so hard it almost bled.
I guess she's just not ready to admit her feelings at all.
"So I guess we'll be going now that we've said goodbye." Kenji started to walk away.
"But why?"
Kaori barely whispered.
Kenji stopped in his tracks and slowly turned to face her. Hope was slowly stirring up in him.
Tears glistened in Kaori's eyes as they slowly fell on her cheeks.
Kenji looked away.
"Isn't this what you wanted?" Kenji replied without looking at her. " Me out of your life?"
"I.. I was stupid, Kenji. I didn't see how much you meant to me until I saw you and... and Tomoe kissing. I'm sorry." Kaori stammered her explanation. She finally got the strength to look up to face Kenji who still looked immovable.
Kenji merely nodded.
What does it all mean, Kaori? What is in there that would change things between us?
Kaori felt her whole world crashing down on her. There was nothing more she can do.. Nothing more she can say, she thought. She could feel a new round of tears coming. She didn't want him to see her like this.
Moreover, Kaori still had her pride. No way was she going to plead him to stay if he didn't want to.
"Well, I guess that's all I have to say." Kaori managed a weak smile and started backing off. "I just wanted you to know how I felt.. before you..before you left. That, and, well,..
.. goodbye."
Kaori quickly walked away before Kenji could see her face crumple and her heart shatter into a million pieces.
So this is how it feels to lose someone you love...
Kenji watched her walk away, fighting the urge to just stay there and cry his heart out. He took a sharp breath and started walking back to the line. He wanted to run after her more than anything else.
But how could he when there was nothing left for him here?
Couldn't she see?
She'd said a lot of words, explained a lot of things to him.
But couldn't she see?
She didn't give him a single reason to stay.
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything
I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that
I tried to hold on to
Goodbye To You
Michelle Branch
***
Man, I am sooooooooo sooooooo sorry this one took a reaaaaaaalllllllllly long time to come out. I've been extremely busy these past weeks. Gomen, gomen.. And life has been really wacky. ;)
Anyway, there are lots of good news! First, it's my sem break!! Yahoo!!!
::throws confetti and dances around the PC::
So I think I'll be able to write the last chapter of this fic, Saving the Best For Last and maybe even Mirai. Plus maybe I could start working on the sequel to Twisted. ^__^
But the bad news is that we're transferring to another house.. And I have to pack all my stuff.. And soooooooo many things to do.. so I dunno which one I'll do first!!! :0
::kawaii wails::
Another good news is that, as you have observed, I didn't end this fic here! It was originally meant to end here, with Kenji staying and all.. but since you guys didn't want it to end just yet, hey, we could extend it! :) Hope that was good. I know this one's short, but there wasn't anything more they can do.. Hehehe..
The bad news is that I think I'm undergoing some kind of writer's block. The thing is, it's not due to lack of inspiration.. but due to some inspiration! I can't write tragedy and sad stuff because I'm happy!! Help me out you guys! :p I can't see drama in my life right now!!
Oh, yeah, to those who sent me text messages and mailed me.. I am so eternally grateful to all of you!! I'm sorry I wasn't able to reply to some.. I ran out of credits as always!!! and I promise to be a diligent writer and a good one at that! These are all for you minna.
Last. check out Silver-Neko's website. it's uber cool. http://www.kenshin.isgreat.net/ Hehe. it's got Saving the Best for Last and some of my other fics, I think. ^_^
Domo arigatou minna for keeping on reading my stuff and commenting and everything! You guys simply ROCK MY WORLD!!! That is so true!! Thank you. thank you. Xie xie!!
::kawaii bows::
Himura Kawaii
Chapter Nine
*** Disclaimers apply... Blah blah. RK's not mine. Hail the Great Watsuki- sama. I'm now a college stud, but still poor!!.... Don't sue me! ^_^
"So where exactly are we going?" Yoshi closed the door on his side of the car and glanced at Kaori questioningly.
Kaori stared unseeingly into the driveway. She wanted to take Kenji back. She wanted him back more than anything.
"I don't know." Kaori bit her lip and closed her eyes for a while. "Maybe we should try checking out his house first, and then see what we're going to do from there."
"Okay, let's go."
"Himura-san and his sister left thirty minutes ago, I'm sorry." The maid shrugged apologetically at them, seeing Kaori's face almost crumple.
Kaori clutched her arms tightly to keep herself from falling down the floor.
Why is this happening to me?
"Oh." Kaori nodded absently.
Yoshi asked for their flight information and politely thanked the housekeeper.
"C'mon. Let's go, Kaori." Yoshi urged Kaori, who seemed to be stuck on the steps. "Kaori, come on." 1
Kaori mechanically followed Kaori back to the car. Snow was falling around them, making Kaori's slow steps pudgy.
"Where to?" Yoshi almost shouted at Kaori's ear. He had asked that question almost three times already.
Kaori shook her head. "Can we just go home?" She asked quietly.
Yoshi grabbed Kaori's arm and shook her. "What the hell is wrong with you Kaori? Where's the girl who knew how to get what she wants?! Talk to me Kaori! Everything's at stake here!"
Kaori looked at Yoshi straight in the eye and sighed.
"Please, Yoshi? I just want to give up and go home." Kaori choked.
"No, Kaori. We have to go now."
Kaori shook her head and ran a hand through her hair. "What? Suppose we reach them, what do I tell him? Do you honestly think that what I tell him could make him stay?!" Kaori slammed her hands on the wheel.
"Shut up and drive Kaori. Whatever happens, at least you can say you did something to make him stay." Yoshi lectured Kaori furiously and continued.
"You lost Arashi. There was nothing you can do about that. But there IS something you can do about Kenji."
"Come on, Kaori. Give him a reason to stay."
Kaori nodded and without a word, she gunned the engine and started for the airport.
Somehow, she couldn't shake off the feeling that this was going to be a long and unfruitful ride.
As they reached the airport, Kaori and Yoshi hurried towards the schedules and learned that Kenji and Tsuabame's flight was already boarding. Yoshi, knowing that they can't go in that area, tried to shout for Tsubame's name when he saw her in the line.
Tsubame turned around quickly and looked for the source of the voice. A grin spread on her face as she let go of her bag and clutched Kenji's shirtsleeve.
"Look, nii-chan! It's Yoshi! And Kaori-niichan's with him!" Tsubame got out of the line and ran towards Yoshi.
Kenji instantly looked up, his features brightened at the sight of Kaori and dimmed almost immediately.
He stared at Kaori, not knowing what to do. In the midst of all the people and the rush, the world for them seemed to keep still.
Kaori was amazed she even found the strength to meet Kenji halfway.
As soon as they were face to face, Kaori looked intently at Kenji.
She was trying to memorize his features, his laughing eyes that seemed to be haggard now, and his red hair, everything about him. She wanted so badly to remember, in case she wouldn't be seeing him again.
How could I have missed it before?
How could I have been so stupid?
"Hey." Kenji greeted her tonelessly.
"Hey." Kaori nodded awkwardly. "So you're leaving, huh?"
Kenji shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so." He seemed distracted by the line that was piling up now.
Kaori traced the floor with the toes of her sneakers. "You didn't even say goodbye." She kept her eyes glued to the floor, not knowing what to say and how to say it.
"There's nothing more left for us to do here. Kyoto is our home." Kenji stated simply.
Kaori could feel desperation seeping in. "But you can't leave." She argued weakly. "What about Yoshi and Tsubame? Yoshi needs Tsubame, she's made him better."
Kenji smiled almost bitterly.
Come on, Kaori, just say the word and I'll stay.
"Well, they're both still young, don't you think? I think Yoshi can wait, and so can Tsubame. She can always return to him."
Kaori nodded dumbly, biting her lip so hard it almost bled.
I guess she's just not ready to admit her feelings at all.
"So I guess we'll be going now that we've said goodbye." Kenji started to walk away.
"But why?"
Kaori barely whispered.
Kenji stopped in his tracks and slowly turned to face her. Hope was slowly stirring up in him.
Tears glistened in Kaori's eyes as they slowly fell on her cheeks.
Kenji looked away.
"Isn't this what you wanted?" Kenji replied without looking at her. " Me out of your life?"
"I.. I was stupid, Kenji. I didn't see how much you meant to me until I saw you and... and Tomoe kissing. I'm sorry." Kaori stammered her explanation. She finally got the strength to look up to face Kenji who still looked immovable.
Kenji merely nodded.
What does it all mean, Kaori? What is in there that would change things between us?
Kaori felt her whole world crashing down on her. There was nothing more she can do.. Nothing more she can say, she thought. She could feel a new round of tears coming. She didn't want him to see her like this.
Moreover, Kaori still had her pride. No way was she going to plead him to stay if he didn't want to.
"Well, I guess that's all I have to say." Kaori managed a weak smile and started backing off. "I just wanted you to know how I felt.. before you..before you left. That, and, well,..
.. goodbye."
Kaori quickly walked away before Kenji could see her face crumple and her heart shatter into a million pieces.
So this is how it feels to lose someone you love...
Kenji watched her walk away, fighting the urge to just stay there and cry his heart out. He took a sharp breath and started walking back to the line. He wanted to run after her more than anything else.
But how could he when there was nothing left for him here?
Couldn't she see?
She'd said a lot of words, explained a lot of things to him.
But couldn't she see?
She didn't give him a single reason to stay.
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything
I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that
I tried to hold on to
Goodbye To You
Michelle Branch
***
Man, I am sooooooooo sooooooo sorry this one took a reaaaaaaalllllllllly long time to come out. I've been extremely busy these past weeks. Gomen, gomen.. And life has been really wacky. ;)
Anyway, there are lots of good news! First, it's my sem break!! Yahoo!!!
::throws confetti and dances around the PC::
So I think I'll be able to write the last chapter of this fic, Saving the Best For Last and maybe even Mirai. Plus maybe I could start working on the sequel to Twisted. ^__^
But the bad news is that we're transferring to another house.. And I have to pack all my stuff.. And soooooooo many things to do.. so I dunno which one I'll do first!!! :0
::kawaii wails::
Another good news is that, as you have observed, I didn't end this fic here! It was originally meant to end here, with Kenji staying and all.. but since you guys didn't want it to end just yet, hey, we could extend it! :) Hope that was good. I know this one's short, but there wasn't anything more they can do.. Hehehe..
The bad news is that I think I'm undergoing some kind of writer's block. The thing is, it's not due to lack of inspiration.. but due to some inspiration! I can't write tragedy and sad stuff because I'm happy!! Help me out you guys! :p I can't see drama in my life right now!!
Oh, yeah, to those who sent me text messages and mailed me.. I am so eternally grateful to all of you!! I'm sorry I wasn't able to reply to some.. I ran out of credits as always!!! and I promise to be a diligent writer and a good one at that! These are all for you minna.
Last. check out Silver-Neko's website. it's uber cool. http://www.kenshin.isgreat.net/ Hehe. it's got Saving the Best for Last and some of my other fics, I think. ^_^
Domo arigatou minna for keeping on reading my stuff and commenting and everything! You guys simply ROCK MY WORLD!!! That is so true!! Thank you. thank you. Xie xie!!
::kawaii bows::