a/n: ok, i just finished chapter 21. i wonder how long this story would be if it was in a word document. i'm gonna have to find that out. cos i'm thinking about posting 3 more stories. let me give you the scenario for them.

1. Corgan and his wife have just been in a car wreck, and Corgan finds himself in hell. The devil makes him a deal: he will allow Corgan to go back to his sophomore year in high school when he met his wife, with only one catch. Meanwhile, she has to go on without Corgan, trying to make a new life.
2. Runaway, homeless 21 year old girl turns up at a high school, and signs herself up for senior classes. She finds a home with a guy she met at her new job, who is gay. They are having a lot of fun but what will happen when the school and students find out she is not who she says she is?
3. The House is the story of a quiet cult who gather their members by picking up homeless druggies, cleaning them up, and putting them to work. Surviving off of cigarettes and Ramen noodles, they are slowly building power, and working towards their ultimate goal...

oh well, tell me what you think. you might have noticed that these have nothing to do with tolkien. right. but the character of bear lives on... i actually derived bear's character from the character of corgan in the first story. so you can check that out, with a more tactful and SUPRISE! more mature bear! haha. oh well. here you go!

In the car, Rita sensed that Legolas might not want to talk, so she put it on her favourite station, KTRU, the college station. "Oh, wow!" said, turning it up. "It's the Japan Cakes."

Legolas' eyes widened as he stared at the buttons and dials and numerical characters on the little panel she was fussing with. A slight lute, strange sounding, some odd drums and crashing sounds, and a strange stringed instrument. But it had an interesting pattern, and though he did not enjoy the sounds it made, he was fascinated by the turns the "song" took, faster, slower, moving higher up the scale, then tumbling back down. These "Japan Cakes" must be a wonderful race of people (even if they had named themselves after some sort of food.) He wondered if maybe they were miniture people, playing behind that panel. No, that's impossible, he thought. It must be magic.

Soon after, they pulled into another parking lot. Legolas dismantled himself from the seatbelt, and got out of the car. Rita hopped out, and then cried out in dismay. "Aw, dammit!!!!" she whined. Legolas came around the side of the car to see what was the matter. She looked up at him, then pointed to the bottom of her long grey skirt. "Lookit! I shut the door on my skirt, and got it all dirty!" Legolas spied a few specks of dirt near the hem of her skirt. He still tried to share in her malcontent, and shook his head as if he were unhappy with the skirt's behaviour. Rita was shaking her head as well. "Who knew pregnancy made you dumb." She took her hands off her hips, and walked towards the Starbucks door. Legolas ran lightly after her.

They got to the counter, and Legolas felt a warm wave of familiarity as he saw Marie on the other side of the bar. She must work as a barmaid here at this tavern, Legolas thought. She smiled at him and Rita. "Hey, darlin!" Rita greeted her, then said in a low voice, "How about a hook up today, huh?"

Marie shook her head and whispered, "Naw, I got my manager here today, she'll kill me."

Rita wrinkled her nose and nodded. "OK, then, I guess I'll have a uh..." She squinted her eyes at the large menu over Marie's head, then squinted at Legolas. "Am I going blind?" She squinted around the place, with Marie laughing. "Ah! I'm going blind! Crap, I can't wait till I get my new glasses." At the mention of her glasses, she slid them up on her nose, and opened her eyes wide. "OH! OK, I'll have a uh, Tazoberry things, what're they called..." Marie nodded, and called over her shoulder, and Legolas watched as the other maids began to mix the drink. He wondered if they had any wine worth drinking. He doubted it. But Rita was rather logical, perhaps she knew what she was doing.

"May I have one too?" he asked her. Rita smiled.

"Certainly." Rita started to order, but watched as Marie did it her own way.

Marie walked over to the other counter where made drinks were set. "Hey, Becky, is this a tall?" she asked another girl. The girl, Becky, shrugged, and answered that it was. "Well, she wanted a venti." Becky shrugged again, and set about working on another one. Marie pushed the drink to Legolas. "You can have this one, Douglas, since it was a mess up," she said, stressing the last two words, and giving Rita and Legolas a wink.

They wandered off with their drinks a minute later, and Rita grabbed Legolas' arm. "Look, Doug, they're leavin the comfy chairs! Hurry!" She dragged him over to where an older couple was getting up, and sat down right after they left the 2 foot radius surrounding the chairs. Legolas sat down across from her. "Ahhhhh," she sighed, putting her feet up on the table and sipping her drink. She stole a sideways glance at Legolas. "So what's up, Doug?" Legolas smiled back at her, as she looked comical to him. He tried to keep up his wavering mood by keeping up a conversation.

"I would rather hear about what is going on with you and your life, Rita," he announced, trying his drink. It was sweet, and cold, and he was reminded of the "ice cream."

Rita looked up at the ceiling and shut her eyes. "Oh, Lordy." She looked at him again. "OK, let's do, then, I guess I need someone to talk to besides Marie and Phil." She stirred the whipped cream into her drink with her straw. "Well first off, I'm a litte worried about money, cos I'm quitting my job in a few months, and I don't know if I'll go back to work after the baby is born."

"What is your job?" Legolas asked. He wondered why a woman would be working in the first place if she had a husband to work for her.

"Oh, funny you ask, I sell dirt," she told him bemusedly, her eyes wide and a smile on her face. Sure enough, the usual jest about her profession had the desired effect on Legolas, as he looked quite stunned. She looked back down at her drink still smiling. "Yeah, I'm in sales in construction, and I sell dirt to people who're buildin houses and don't have enough dirt packed down on the uh," she tried to show him with her hands, "the uh, foundation, oh you know." She gave up, as Legolas gave her a polite nod to relieve her of her explanatory duties. "Yeah, anyways, they told me they would give me a leave of absense thingy, like a pregnancy leave, or whatever." She paused, and held onto on of her fingers, and looked off into space. "Idn't there another word for that? That sounds... hm." She waved her hand around, to dismiss the ex-ensuing obligitory practice of thinking hard.

"Is it that you would say you enjoy your work?" Legolas asked her, honestly wondering what she would say.

"I-" Rita started, then retracted her speech. Do I? she wondered. "Hm," she pondered aloud. "I dunno, I never really thought about it." She tried to quickly list the positve and negative aspects of her work in her head, then answered. "Well I like the other girl I work with, Brenda, and I don't mind my boss...he's kind of a jerk but once you get used to it, it's more funny than anything." She shrugged. "I guess I do... I mean, I guess I'll miss it... Well I'll miss Brenda, but I can always have her over outside of work." Rita shrugged again. "Nope! Guess I won't miss it too bad!!" she finished, sipping on her drink and smiling.

It was quiet for a few minutes and Legolas actually felt at peace. He felt he could sleep. He took off the fake glasses, put them on the table by Rita's feet. Just as he was sitting back and about to close his eyes, Rita spoke again. "So anyways, there's the money thing, and I don't think I'm going to go back to work. Phil works on computers and him and his friend Mike are thinking of starting their own computer repair shop. I mean, I think that would be good money, but they've gotta get it off the ground first, and I don't want to be in a financially experimental stage while we've got a kid to support." She paused and stared blanky into space. "WOW, a kid, that just sounds so strange!"

Legolas smiled. Even in this strange world, a woman's first child was an important event. It made him feel better to recognize a common moral. "How long have you been married to Satan?"

Rita snapped out of it and looked at him, then began laughing. "I still think it's so funny that people call him Satan," she said shaking her head. "Three years this February." She giggled and shook her head again. "But man... Do you realize how freaked out everyone at my school was when I told them I was dating Satan? For God's sake, I was at a Lutheran school. I actually think that's around the time Lu stopped hanging out with me. But that's OK, cos I still hung out at her house cos of Bear." Legolas nodded. "That's actually how I met Phil. I was at Bear an Lu's house, studying with Lu for a test in World Religion. I was 16..." Rita trailed of dreamily, a little smile on her face. Legolas smiled too. "Bear was over there with Phil, cos Phil was in his Geography class and they were cutting up the newspaper for a project, since Phil's family didn't take the newspaper." Rita pushed her glasses up on her nose, and looked at Legolas. "Aww, anyhow, we were together five years before we got married, and we've been married almost three. Eight years with that love."

Legolas smiled at her. She does seem so happy, he thought. He actually found that he was interested in the relation of one friend to another. Bear and Phil had known each other through their education, as had Rita and Lu. He decided to ask further. "How do you all know the others, such as Marie and Jane, and Shawn?"

"Oh--well, Shawn," Rita sputtered, waving a hand at Legolas, and sipping her drink. "He's actually my cousin." Legolas raised his eyebrows. "Yeah, I've known that little bugger all m'life. An if you're wondering, yes, he has always been that strange," she said with wide eyes, nodding to emphasize the point. "And Jane an Marie, oh, hmmm..." She thought for a little while. "I dunno. I think they were a package deal with Bear. At least Marie was." Rita wrinkled her nose, causing her glasses to slip down. "Jane was a package deal with Marie." Legolas gave a short laugh, and Rita giggled, pushing up her glasses. "Oh, well, anyways--" She shut her eyes. "I feel like I'm supposed to be somewhere." She sat back. "I wonder.

"NO! Helping my Granma buy groceries!" Rita yelped, jumping up in alarm. She looked at Legolas. "I gotta go! Marie can take you home!" She grabbed her purse and her drink, and rushed towards the door. "Bye, Doug!" Legolas raised his hand to wave but she was gone.

Legolas sat back in the chair, crushed. Now what am I to do? he wondered. He found that he was a little tired. Pulling his feet up in the chair, he found that it was not exactly the epitome of comfort but it would do; it was certainly more comforatble than the ground. He closed his eyes -- Why? I never close my eyes to sleep! -- but he was already falling into a deeper level of rest. Rapid eye movement, then a dream.

a dream

-- the basement what is a basement? it was dark like a dungeon but he knew where he was he was in cody's house who is cody? but he knew who cody was as well and they were listening to yes that was cody's favourite band he remembered who was cody? cody was tall and had messy highlighted hair with a pinched face who was he? he was a good friend, a best friend the sounds of yes the sounds of his voice locked inside the mother earth to close the cover all the interest shown they won't hide hold they won't tell you to turn one another to the sign at the time float your climb cody laughing at what? the t.v. what is a tv? short for television what's a television? but he knew and they were laughing and they were talking about what they would preach at the masses tomorrow what masses? but he knew what masses the masses that devoured every word that he said and the money they gave to cody and cody played guitar on the other side of the outdoor mall and what was an outdoor mall? but it was obvious to him, obvious and yes still droned on in the background, on repeat on and you and i over and over, all ten minutes and whatnot seconds and you and i climb, crossing the shapes of the morning and you and i reach over the sun for the river and you and i climb, clearer, towards the movement and you and i called over valleys of endless seas cody yelling shit blue and red lights outside the window wells --

Legolas sat up suddenly, his breath uneven and short. He placed his hand on his forehead, hoping to diminish the swimming effect that was drowning his thoughts. Who is Cody? he thought, with a true fear.

"Doug, what's wrong? You look like shit!"

Legolas looked up and into the round face of Jane, looking down on him. She was chewing rudely. "What have you got in your mouth?" he asked, in spite of his spell.

Jane popped his arm. "Gum, dipshit," she told him, flopping down in the chair where Rita had sat. Legolas stared at her in shock and disbelief. Jane followed this by rolling out her little tongue like a red carpet for royalty; upon it sat a wad of white matter. She then snapped her little mouth shut and began to examine her nails. Legolas sat up straight and put on his sternest face.

"Where I am from, a maid does not dare lay her hands on a lord," he informed her.

Jane rolled her eyes. "Where ya from, Camp David?" She examined her hands, with her fingers fanned out and hands held far away. "And I don't know who told you I was still a maid, but I gave that up... shit... years ago." She petted her nails and looked out the window disinterestedly. "And p.s. pal, you keep callin your self a lord and you're gonna get your fuckin brains blew out."

Legolas gaped at her. Why would she so blatantly dismiss her not being a maiden any longer? What a bold and horrible woman! he thought to himself in horror.

Jane didn't seem too alarmed, still examining her nails and muttering. "Shit, the day I clean another frickin house is the day hell is gonna freeze over." Legolas rolled his eyes and stared bleakly out the window next to him. Jane glanced up from her hands and stared at him, quite indiscreetly. "OK, you little prick, what's the prob?" Legolas turned slowly from the window to Jane.

There was something agitating, very annoying about her. He dismissed it as the "gum," and lessened his stare. "I don't understand you," he told her, not caring how rude he came across. "You've got that wretched 'gum' in your mouth and until you take it out I won't understand you." She knotted her eyebrows but before she could say a word, he added, "And I won't even try." Jane's eyebrows burrowed further and she made a horrific face at him.

i know it's been forever since i updated, but as i've gotten 2 reviews in the last week, i think you guys (if only one of you, or two) have persuaded me to give this another try. the chapters might not be as long as they were in the beginning, but they'll get better. i promise!

Legolas shrugged, and looked back out the window. He had decided that enough was enough. This demonic lady could take her disrespect elsewhere.

Finally, Jane came to the conclusion that her gum was getting old anyway, and she wanted to know what had crawled up Doug's ass and died. Suddenly, Legolas jumped back as the gum appeared on the window pane closest to his face. His glance tore in the direction of Jane, who had thrown her head back with laughter. Legolas sat back in the chair and laced his long fingers across his chest. "What's cookin', Sam?" Jane asked, leaning forward and grinning crookedly.

"I hope, Jane," Legolas stated crisply, "that you do not address everyone as rudely as you do I. But Jane, I have this haunting notion that you do. And another thing, don't call me Sam, and for all that is good, please stop calling me Doug." He straightened up, and put the fake glasses back on. "I'd prefer you call me Legolas."

At this, Jane burst into a fit of knee slapping laughter. To Legolas it seemed her gales of obnoxious braying were bouncing off the low ceiling and echoing through his brain. He immediately came to the solution slapping her. Before the execution of this event, Marie had waltzed up the the pair, carrying what Legolas assumed was a broom, and a device for holding that which was swept. "Hey kids, did you see where Rita ran off to?" she asked good naturedly, while abusing the carpet in front of them, raking over it over and over again.

Jane shrugged, and fiddled with her lip ring. "Grandmother's," Legolas replied, his words like a vacuum. In his mind he was now on the idea of strangling Jane. Such a wreckless creature of filth should never continue to exist. His hands formed balls, and tightened until his knuckles were white.

"You OK, Doug?" Marie inquired of him, dropping a hand on him and rubbing his nearly bald head.

Legolas smiled tightly, and shoved his fists deep into the crevasses of the seat upon which he sat. "I am actually feeling quite distressed," he admitted, with as much patience as he could possibly exert. He had just had a very confusing dream, he was ready to murder Jane, and now he, (a prince!), was being patronized by someone he had earlier respected. He stood suddenly, and Marie jumped back a bit.

"Whoa, there, boy," she cried good naturedly, but her face was a little concerned.

"I am going outside," Legolas announced, and walked towards the doors that led to the porch, leaving murmuring behind him. He pushed the doors with more might than needed, and they swung out in accordance with the overexertion, one of them hitting a metal trash can with a satisfying *BANG*. Legolas strolled over to a table, and sat down. Suddenly he put his head in his hands... he had an excruciating pain in his temples. Why am I allowing my patience to run so thin? he wondered to himself. Shouldn't I be above humans in their tolerance for ignorance? He thought of Marie, and Shawn... And Bear... He shook his head and smiled a bit... Never mind, Bear doesn't belong on any list that is measuring high levels of patience. Legolas smiled sadly. But perhaps high levels of tolerance, he thought affectionately. Bear had been very tolerant and kind with him, and the realization of this brought his pride down quite a bit.

a/n: sorry this took half a year or longer to get up and it sucks. but give me time.. i have to get back in the swing of things. ok, well, kisses! love, sarah.