Disclaimer: Not mine.
Author's Note: Okay, I'm honestly not to sure how I feel about this one either, but I couldn't resist redecorating Kerch's office. Thanks for your reviews! I really appreciate anything you have to say!
"I don't know Mulder...." Scully said warily, glancing at her newly palm- tree-ed walls. She was still plotting the prefect way to kill Mulder for redoing her living room.
"Ah, come on. You only live once. Besides, he'll never know!"
"Right, but how many agents would hate his guts enough to do this?"
"A lot."
"Good point."
There was silence. Mulder was thinking, and Scully was studying the constellations on her ceiling. Oh my gosh! She never noticed that before! Mulder painted a UFO on her ceiling!
And she thought he was a dead man before.....
"Well," Mulder continued, "You don't have to, but I've already called them."
"We're their best customers, Mulder." Scully smiled, and hung up.
The next evening, after Deputy Director Kerch left the building, Mulder and Scully snuck into his office. The 99% of agents who worked there who weren't obsessed had long gone home, so Mulder and Scully could work this in peace.
Waiting inside the office was the designer from "While You Were Out" that would be helping them redecorate D.D. Kerch's office.
Sitting down, they discussed what to do. First thing was first: Were they going to be semi-evil or really evil?
They chose really evil. Pay back for all those times he tried to ruin the X- Files.
"Okay....How about we go with lime colored walls?" Asked Mike, once Mulder had reported that, at heart, Kerch was really a psychedelic man.
Scully bit back a smile. Oh, boy.
"That's great. It'll..uh..really suit him." Mulder agreed, holding back laughter.
They rolled out the red carpet. Literally. They replaced Kerch's usual brown one with a bright red one. Out went the desk as well. It was replaced by what a Mike called "mod meets official" desk. A.K.A. it was a black structure that any normal person would have to ponder about for a few hours before realizing that it is, indeed, a desk.
Mulder smiled at the lava lamp he had adjusted on Kerch's desk. He sighed with a content smile.
Mike rolled in a disco ball. Scully looked afraid, worried that if this was ever traced back to them, that they would be barred from the FBI without chance of reinstatement.
Early the next morning, a Saturday, they finished the office.
"You *are* on good terms with the man, right?" asked the decorator.
"You never mentioned anything about that...." Scully muttered.
Mulder smiled, "Of course we are! We're regular pals! Go clubbing every night..We're like this!"
Knowing that the Deputy Director would be there any moment, the camera crew left, and Mulder and Scully went down to their office. They'd gotten no sleep, but they were so tickled pink, that they had more energy then they usually did.
They needed an excuse to go into his office. So, around noon, they went up to him to submit a travel request. The secretary wasn't there, so they knocked lightly on the door, then pushed it open.
Apparently, those two past drama with flying colors in high school. They walked in dead-pan, then took a step-back like they were totally surprised.
"What can I do for you agents?"
Kerch's tone was more dissatisfied than usual.
"Sir?" Scully asked as if she were just being brought back to her senses.
"I like what you've done with the place, sir...." Mulder nodded approvingly. "It's what I should really do to my apartment. You know....'mod meets official' type-thing...." Mulder approved, with a knowing smile.
Just seeing Kerch's horrified face was payment enough for no sleep.
Author's Note: Okay, I'm honestly not to sure how I feel about this one either, but I couldn't resist redecorating Kerch's office. Thanks for your reviews! I really appreciate anything you have to say!
"I don't know Mulder...." Scully said warily, glancing at her newly palm- tree-ed walls. She was still plotting the prefect way to kill Mulder for redoing her living room.
"Ah, come on. You only live once. Besides, he'll never know!"
"Right, but how many agents would hate his guts enough to do this?"
"A lot."
"Good point."
There was silence. Mulder was thinking, and Scully was studying the constellations on her ceiling. Oh my gosh! She never noticed that before! Mulder painted a UFO on her ceiling!
And she thought he was a dead man before.....
"Well," Mulder continued, "You don't have to, but I've already called them."
"We're their best customers, Mulder." Scully smiled, and hung up.
The next evening, after Deputy Director Kerch left the building, Mulder and Scully snuck into his office. The 99% of agents who worked there who weren't obsessed had long gone home, so Mulder and Scully could work this in peace.
Waiting inside the office was the designer from "While You Were Out" that would be helping them redecorate D.D. Kerch's office.
Sitting down, they discussed what to do. First thing was first: Were they going to be semi-evil or really evil?
They chose really evil. Pay back for all those times he tried to ruin the X- Files.
"Okay....How about we go with lime colored walls?" Asked Mike, once Mulder had reported that, at heart, Kerch was really a psychedelic man.
Scully bit back a smile. Oh, boy.
"That's great. It'll..uh..really suit him." Mulder agreed, holding back laughter.
They rolled out the red carpet. Literally. They replaced Kerch's usual brown one with a bright red one. Out went the desk as well. It was replaced by what a Mike called "mod meets official" desk. A.K.A. it was a black structure that any normal person would have to ponder about for a few hours before realizing that it is, indeed, a desk.
Mulder smiled at the lava lamp he had adjusted on Kerch's desk. He sighed with a content smile.
Mike rolled in a disco ball. Scully looked afraid, worried that if this was ever traced back to them, that they would be barred from the FBI without chance of reinstatement.
Early the next morning, a Saturday, they finished the office.
"You *are* on good terms with the man, right?" asked the decorator.
"You never mentioned anything about that...." Scully muttered.
Mulder smiled, "Of course we are! We're regular pals! Go clubbing every night..We're like this!"
Knowing that the Deputy Director would be there any moment, the camera crew left, and Mulder and Scully went down to their office. They'd gotten no sleep, but they were so tickled pink, that they had more energy then they usually did.
They needed an excuse to go into his office. So, around noon, they went up to him to submit a travel request. The secretary wasn't there, so they knocked lightly on the door, then pushed it open.
Apparently, those two past drama with flying colors in high school. They walked in dead-pan, then took a step-back like they were totally surprised.
"What can I do for you agents?"
Kerch's tone was more dissatisfied than usual.
"Sir?" Scully asked as if she were just being brought back to her senses.
"I like what you've done with the place, sir...." Mulder nodded approvingly. "It's what I should really do to my apartment. You know....'mod meets official' type-thing...." Mulder approved, with a knowing smile.
Just seeing Kerch's horrified face was payment enough for no sleep.