Disclaimer: I don't own the Power Rangers, but I do own the song, 'Red or Blue'. I ought to know, I wrote it. ^_^
Author's Notes: This was formerly under the title: 'Red or Blue'. This is a TJ/Cassie romance fic, set fairly early in PriS, before they met Zhane. Thanks to those who helped with the song. This is a rewritten version, so I hope you like it. ^_^
By: Jade Daniels
To put it simply, it was a beautiful day in Angel Grove. It was one of those rare days where there were no monster attacks and no fear of danger. The sun was shining brightly in the clear blue sky. The nearby ocean sparkled from the reflected sunlight. Nearby, children could be heard laughing while they played.
All of these things went unnoticed by Theodore Jarvis Johnson as he sat at Ernie's Beach Café. His mood was sullen, as were his thoughts. The current losses dealt to the Power Rangers were at the top of those thoughts: the destruction of the Power Chamber, the loss of the Turbo Powers and the capture of Zordon. As always, TJ blamed himself for those losses. He felt that if he had been a better leader, none of this would have happened.
The current Blue Astro Ranger had never felt completely comfortable with his new colour. Once the euphoria of taking on the Astro powers had worn off, he realized that he wasn't really a Blue Ranger. And if he was being honest with himself, he really wasn't any kind of Ranger. He was just a second-rate has-been who wasn't fit to wear his colour.
"Hey TJ!" The Blue Ranger snapped out of his daze and turned to see Tommy Oliver standing beside him. The former Red Turbo Ranger grinned as he sat down beside him. "You looked like you were deep in thought. Everything okay?"
TJ shook his head. "Lots of stuff on my mind. Actually, it's sort of why I wanted to talk to you."
"Oh? So what did you want to see me about?" Tommy asked as a waitress took his order.
"Some advice I guess," answered TJ. He was glad that he had been able to catch Tommy in Angel Grove. Taking a deep breath, he asked, "Did you ever feel not worthy of your colour?"
"Yes." The simple answer surprised TJ. "Plenty of times, especially when I first became the White Ranger. Or when Zordon returned the Green Ranger Powers to me. It was especially during that time that I felt like I wasn't worthy of being a Ranger. I had been evil, and even though I was under a spell, I still felt guilty for all of the bad things that I had done. Then, when the other Rangers did take me in, I still felt then that I didn't deserve to be a Power Ranger. I didn't feel worthy of being a hero. At the time, all I was going to use the Power for was to make amends for all the evil deeds that I had done. But, I've learned better since then."
Tommy looked at the Blue Ranger carefully. "Are you still thinking about the Power Chamber?"
TJ looked away from his friend, unable to deny the truth. "Yeah. Sometimes, I feel as if I don't truly belong on the team anymore. I let the others down. I lost two sets of Zords and the Power Chamber. How could they ever forgive me for that? And I'm certainly no leader. Andros is much better than I ever was."
"TJ, I knew what I was doing when I chose you to replace me as the Red Ranger," Tommy said. "You are a courageous, true-hearted person, one that I am proud to call a fellow Ranger." He paused for a moment. "Look, I'm going to take you talk to a couple of friends of mine. I think that they may be able to help you, more than I can alone."
"Okay, so where are we?" asked TJ as Tommy brought him to one of the many dojos in Angel Grove. TJ had passed by this one before when he had been considering taking more classes in martial arts. The sign on the front read: Red Star Dragon Martial Arts Centre. It was a small, but nicely decorated building, with large windows that showed a well-kept studio inside.
"This is where my friends work," explained Tommy as he led TJ inside. The former Red Ranger looked around, and apparently finding whom he wanted, walked up to a young man dressed in a red tank top and black pants.
"Old dress habits die hard, huh bro?" was Tommy's greeting. The young man turned around, a big smile on his face.
"Tommy! Hey bro, it's good to see you!" he exclaimed, giving Tommy a huge bear hug.
Tommy brought his friend over to TJ. "TJ, I'd like for you to meet Jason Scott. He's a teacher and co-owner of this place."
"Hi," greeted TJ, unsure as to why Tommy would bring him to see a martial arts teacher.
Sensing TJ's confusion, Tommy indicated to Jason that they needed a private place to talk. The three of them went into a nearby office. Tommy and TJ sat down on a large couch, while sat in the chair behind the desk. "TJ, I thought that you could discuss some of your problems with Jason. He was the first Red Ranger, as well as the former Gold Zeo Ranger."
Both Jason and TJ looked surprised. Jason was about to ask why Tommy would commit such a breach of trust when Tommy spoke again. "Jason, TJ here is the current Blue Astro Ranger. He took over for me as the Red Turbo Ranger." He leaned forward in his seat. "And right now, he needs a little help from us." Tommy explained TJ's current mood.
Jason nodded in understanding as Tommy finished. He turned to look at TJ. "I know it isn't easy being the leader, no matter for how long. You have all the burdens and responsibilities of the team riding on your shoulders. But it also isn't easy giving up that responsibility either. Tommy was assigned the leadership when he became the White Ranger. I hadn't understood why at the time, and was even a little angry with Zordon because of it. But he told me he had a reason for it, and I trusted him. Eventually, I ended up going to Geneva, and Tommy would remain as leader for the Ranger teams. Obviously, it worked out for the best."
"Yeah, but my situation is different," replied TJ. "The destruction of the Power Chamber and the loss of the Turbo Powers were both my fault. And no one moved away, I just became the Blue Ranger and that was because there was already a Red Ranger: Andros. Now I'm just the second-in-command; Andros is the real leader of our group. I also heard that the first Blue Ranger was a genius. Justin was the smart one in our group, and he was blue. I'm not, so why am I blue?"
Tommy and Jason looked at each other, both getting the same idea. "Wait right here," said Jason, heading towards the door. "I'm going to introduce you to someone."
"Who?" TJ asked, curious as to who else would be able to help him with this.
"Another friend of ours," grinned Tommy. He then looked at TJ, his eyes scrutinizing. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but you had something else on your mind besides all this, didn't you?"
TJ was shocked, having never expected Tommy to be so perceptive. "Uh, I guess so. Tommy, have you ever been in some with a woman who's in love with someone else?"
"Well, that's another question I can answer yes to," Tommy chuckled. "It was a long time ago. Well, not so long I guess, but long enough so that it doesn't hurt so much anymore. It was with an old girlfriend of mine. When we broke up, she told me that she had found someone else. Obviously, I was still in love with her then. But eventually, my wound healed and she and I moved on."
He looked carefully at TJ. "Now, you're obviously asking this because of someone on your mind. Who is it?"
"Cassie," answered TJ, his voice a low whisper. "I don't know why I'm still so hung up on her Tommy." He quickly explained the current situation with Cassie and the Phantom Ranger. "She doesn't care about me that way, yet I can't help the way I feel!"
"Love, is a very strange thing," replied Tommy with a wise look upon his face. "I'm sorry that I can't really help you. All I can say is that you only have two choices: tell her or don't. You can tell her, and depending on how she feels, it may make things awkward afterwards, but how will things be if you don't tell her? You may be reading this whole Phantom thing wrong, and then you might have missed out on a wonderful opportunity. Despite what I know now, I wouldn't change a thing about my relationship with my old girlfriend. TJ, relationships within a circle of friends can be hard enough. Within a team of Rangers, it can be even harder."
Whatever TJ might have said in response was cut off as Jason came back in with another young man behind him.
"Hey Tommy!" the young man exclaimed, "How've you been?"
Tommy smiled, "Great. Rocky, I'd like you to meet TJ. He went through a certain colour change recently, from red to blue. I thought you might be able to provide a bit of insight into that." Rocky laughed, and began to explain to TJ what Tommy meant.
"So, do we have everything ready?" Cassie Chan looked over at her friend and predecessor, Katherine Hilliard as they were walking through Angel Grove, to the dojo that Rocky and Jason currently owned. The two Pink Rangers, current and former, had just finished completing preparations for a Ranger get-together that they had been planning for the past few months.
Katherine nodded. "I think so. Everyone has been told, and Ernie said that he could have the space cleared out for us exclusively." It had been a delightful surprise to find that Ernie had become the owner of the Youth Center again, and in remembrance of all the times most of the Rangers, former and current, had spent there, the two girls had decided that it would be the perfect place to have the party.
Cassie smiled. "That's good. I think we might just be able to pull this off." She sighed quietly. "It's probably one of the few things to go right these past few weeks."
"Oh?" Katherine looked curiously at her friend. "I take it that you mean the things that have happened to the team?" It was hard trying to keep up with what the current Ranger team was doing. What little news that the now-Astro Rangers could tell them was few and far in between, interspersed occasionally with bits from the news programs and newspapers. Despite all this though, Katherine did know what Cassie was talking about.
"Yeah," Cassie replied. "You already know a lot of what has happened. I dunno, it's just getting us down lately I think. You know, the whole reality of it? Like, Carlos, Ash, TJ and I got these new powers sure, but we lost a lot too. I'm not even sure if it all balances out anymore. And, I think TJ feels guilty for a lot of it too."
"Because he was the leader?" guessed Katherine. She knew the symptoms of leader-guilt, having seen it many times in Tommy, during his stints as leader of the Morphin, Zeo and Turbo Rangers. "He thinks that it is his fault?" She was a little surprised though, at the mention of the current Blue Ranger.
"I'm sure he does," Cassie shook her head, "And I wish I knew how to help him. But we've been so busy with things lately.... But that's not real excuse. He's hurting, and I want to be there for him. He's... my friend."
Katherine tilted her head as she looked at the younger Ranger, finally realizing why the conversation had turned to TJ. "Do you wish that he was something more?"
Cassie blinked in surprise, not realizing that she had been so obvious. "You can tell?"
Katherine smiled. "Just from the way you were talking about him, and the look on your face. I've dealt with my share of people in love before. Have you told him how you feel?"
Cassie shook her head. "No way!" she exclaimed. "That'd be the last thing I'd do. Besides... I haven't been really thinking just about TJ all the time. There's... been this other guy on my mind too. Not as much lately, but still.... How can I really say that I love TJ... or if it really is even love, if I've been chasing this other guy too?"
"Okay, you've got a point," Katherine agreed. "That is a hard question to answer. All I can tell you is that in my experience, love is when you can honestly say that you want to be with that someone for the rest of your life. Of course, feelings may change over time, but at this very moment, whoever is foremost in your heart, is most likely the one that you love. I think the thing you have to ask yourself is if TJ is the one you want, can you remain faithful to him? Or, are you likely to remain chasing after this other guy?"
Cassie bit her lip, obviously thinking hard about Katherine's question. The former Pink Ranger hoped that Cassie would be honest with herself about whatever answer she chose. It would be the only way that Cassie could resolve this conflict within herself. The two women were just entering the dojo when TJ left. Even distracted in thought, Cassie greeted her teammate with her usual cheerfulness, but his reply seemed distant. Katherine and Cassie looked at Rocky, Jason and Tommy, who had remained inside the dojo.
"What's wrong with TJ?" Cassie asked, concern etched on her face.
The guys looked at each other, trying to figure out how to answer the Pink Ranger's question. None of them wanted to betray TJ's confidence. Yet, perhaps one of TJ's own teammates would be able to help with the Blue Ranger's current state of mind. Finally, Tommy spoke up, deciding that Cassie might be able to help. "TJ's feeling a little depressed." He briefly relayed the discussion that he and the others had just had with TJ, leaving out the TJ's feelings for Cassie.
"Oh," replied Cassie, not certain at all what she could say. It was somewhat ironic that she had just been discussing the same thing with Katherine. Unfortunately, it also showed a distance that was growing between the two friends. If they couldn't tell each other what was wrong, and had to go to their predecessors for help, how coherent a team could they remain?
"Cassie, why don't you go find TJ?" suggested Katherine. "I can tell the guys the rest of the plans for tomorrow."
Cassie smiled. "Thanks, Kat." With that, the Pink Astro Ranger left in search of her teammate.
Tommy looked expectantly at Katherine as they watched Cassie leave. Jason and Rocky had made their way back to their offices now, leaving the couple alone. "I've got a feeling that you and Cassie were talking about something similar?"
"You know, you're getting real good at that," chuckled Katherine. "Yeah, we were. Cassie's feeling a little depressed. I've got a feeling that the whole former Turbo team is feeling that way because of their recent events."
Tommy shrugged. "Well, they're going to have to pick up and move on. We did."
"I know," replied Katherine, "But it's hard to see them like that. I hope the party tomorrow will help. Maybe they can some advice from the others that we couldn't give them."
"Maybe some advice on their love lives too," smiled Tommy.
Katherine looked at him in surprise. "Are you telling me that you and TJ talked about his love life?"
Tommy frowned as he nodded. "Yes, why do you ask?"
"Well, I was doing the same with Cassie," replied Katherine. She got a gleam in her eye. "Let me guess, TJ likes Cassie..."
"And Cassie likes TJ..." finished Tommy. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "So they've admitted to everyone but each other. Were our love lives ever this complicated?"
Katherine kissed him on the cheek. "Do you really want me to answer that?"
"TJ!" The Blue Ranger turned to find Cassie running up to him. "You got a minute?"
"Hey Cass," he replied, curious as to why Cassie wanted to talk to him. "Uh yeah, sure."
But Cassie was quiet as she walked beside him. Minutes passed in silence as the two continued their walk through Angel Grove. Out of the corner of his eye, TJ studied Cassie's face, trying to gain some insight as to why she had come to him in the first place. He saw something shadowing her lovely features, as if there was something inside of her that she had to say, but didn't know if it would be good to do so.
"Cass, didn't you want to talk to me about something?" he asked gently.
She turned her head to look at him, looking as if he had just broken her thoughts. "Oh yeah, I did." She bit her lip, obviously trying to decide what to say. "Um, I was talking with Kat and Tommy earlier, at the dojo, just after you left."
TJ frowned, wondering where the conversation was going. "Yeah, I saw you when I left."
"Well, Tommy told me some things," said Cassie. "Look, I just wanted you to know that I feel the same way too."
He blinked; surprised that Cassie would say that to him. He stopped walking and looked at her square in the face, wondering if this was suddenly a dream. "Wait, you do?"
"Yeah," she nodded as she too stopped beside him. "I think we all do sometimes. I mean, it wasn't all because of you that we lost the Zords, or even the Power Chamber. We all were a part of it. And if you really want to blame someone, blame Divatox. She was the one who really destroyed them." She laid a hand on his shoulder. "Look, I'm just saying that you don't have to carry the guilt inside by yourself. We all share the blame, and we're all here for you."
"Oh," sighed TJ. For one brief moment, he had thought that Cassie had meant that she loved him. He should have known that it was too good to be true. Besides, it was unlikely that Tommy would break that bit of news to her anyway. But it was nice to know that the others, including Cassie, were available as sounding boards. After listening to Rocky, Jason and Tommy, he had begun to feel like maybe he was shouldering too much guilt over recent events.
"Thanks," he finally said. "You're right, I know. But, this is something I have to deal with on my own too."
"Okay, I can understand that," replied Cassie. She took a deep breath. "Actually, there was something else that I wanted to ask you."
"What?" asked TJ.
"I... um, oh, this is hard to ask," she shook her head. "You know what, never mind. Um, I'm going to head back to the Megaship. I'll see you later, okay?" With that, she left, leaving a very confused TJ in her wake.
"Now what was that all about?" he murmured.
Those were the very words Cassie was repeating to herself by the time she got back to her quarters on board the Astro Megaship. "What was I thinking?" she kept repeating to herself.
Had she made truly made a decision between the Phantom Ranger and TJ? Her almost-confession seemed to say that she had. But when had she made this decision? Certainly it hadn't been something she had been thinking about consciously for awhile. Her conversation with Kat had been the first time she had even really thought about her feelings for either TJ or Phantom ever since she had become an Astro Ranger.
She sat down at her desk. Her eyes fell upon a set of pink-coloured stationary. Struck with sudden inspiration, she grabbed a pencil out of the holder on her desk and began writing down the lyrics to the song that had flowed into her head. As she continued writing, she hummed the tune to herself, occasionally singing a few of the words.
"Red or blue, I'll still love you..."
It was at the Ranger reception the next day that Cassie found herself on stage, singing those very same words. Everyone had been having a good time at the party. Many of them had been talking, reminiscing about their times as Power Rangers. Many introductions had been made, new Rangers meeting old ones and friendships being made and renewed.
Finally, she had stepped onto the stage, which had already been used by some of the vocally talented people. "I'm going to be singing something that I wrote very recently. It's for someone who means a lot to me. I hope the message is well received."
TJ was up near the stage, having been catching up with Justin. As Cassie's beautiful voice melted through the air, he found himself drawn to her words. He thought that she looked stunning, dressed in a sleeveless pink dress patterned with exotic-looking flowers. Her waterfall of black hair had been swept back from her face, revealing her stunning Asian features.
He knew that if she did love Phantom, that was her choice. As Tommy had said, love was a strange thing. He couldn't control his own emotions, and he knew he shouldn't try to control hers. Even if she did end up with someone else, he would always cherish her in his heart. But that was what love was supposed to be, wasn't it? Not controlling, but freeing. He would find a way to be happy for her.
But just as TJ had resigned himself to that fact, Cassie's next words shocked him to the core. He looked at her, his eyes wide, unable to believe what he was hearing. Was she saying what he thought she was saying? Did she actually mean it? He knew that he and Cassie would be having a talk after the song was done.
'Cause red or blue, I will still love you
Green or gold, I will have you to hold
Black or white, you will be my shining knight
Red or blue, I will still always love you
Cassie wished she knew what TJ was feeling right now. When she had looked at him, singing that verse, he had looked so shock. She hadn't been able to tell if there was any love, hope, or anything in his eyes. She hoped herself that she hadn't just embarrassed herself, as well as him, in front of all of their friends. But she knew that she would find out soon.
As she finished the last verse, much applause met Cassie's ears. She smiled shyly and put the microphone back into its holder. As she stepped off of the stage, someone turned on a slow song, letting it pipe through the surrounding speakers. Couples began to form around her, dancing to the music. She walked over to one side of the room, knowing that he would eventually find her. She wasn't disappointed.
"Hi," he said.
She kept her eyes away from him, knowing that she would be unable to deal with the rejection she might find in his eyes. "Hi."
"Did you mean it?" he asked quietly.
Still keeping her eyes down, she nodded. "Yes, I did mean it. I think I have meant it for quite awhile now." Finally, she looked up, but still unable to meet his eyes. "I care about you TJ, a lot."
"What about Phantom?" he asked.
"I won't lie to you," she replied, "I cared about him. I think, in some ways, I still do. But lately, I've realized that I'm not in love with him. Maybe I was just chasing something intangible, something I thought was new and exciting, because I believed that what I couldn't get what I wanted here on Earth."
"And what was it that you wanted?" Something in TJ's voice finally let her meet his eyes.
She smiled, seeing an emotion in his dark depths that echoed her own. "What I wanted was someone who has always been there for me, a shoulder to cry on, you know?" She took his hands into hers. "You. I wanted you to know, that no matter who you are, you'll still be TJ, the one that I love."
He brought her hands to his lips, delivering a light kiss to back of her hand. "I love you too, probably from the moment I met you. I was so sure all this time that you cared for Phantom. I was even going to try and dredge up some positive emotion about you two. Now, I'm glad that I won't have to."
"No, you won't have to," she agreed. With that, their lips met in a sweet kiss.
Elsewhere in the party, two sets of eyes watched the new couple fondly.
"I guess they didn't need our help after all?" smiled Katherine.
"No, I guess not," agreed Tommy, taking his girlfriend's hand into his. "I'm glad they managed to work things out."
"I'm happy for them too." With that, Tommy and Katherine made their way to the dance floor.
Later that night, under the light of the silver moon, the new couple walked hand in hand through Angel Grove Park. Unknown to them, a figure in black watched them as they passed by. He raised a hand to them in a silent goodbye to them both: the woman who's love he never deserved, and the man who did truly deserve her love. He then placed a hand upon the ruby on his chest, and turning invisible, he silently walked away.
Second Author's Notes: As I mentioned before, this is a rewritten version of the story. Unlike the original, I did not put all the lyrics to 'Red or Blue' in here, as I've begun to dislike using whole songs in stories. In any case, the whole song will be posted up separately for those who may want to see it.