See disclaimers in first post...now on with the show.
Faith had put the chicken in to bake twenty minutes prior and was
steaming the vegetables as Willow came into kitchen. Looking up from
her task, she motioned to the glass of wine already on the
table. "No time like the present, everything should be ready in
about ten minutes," Faith said reassuring Willow that everything was
under control.
"Well, it smells great! I had no idea there were so many levels to
you. I may have to stick around and find out more about you," Willow
teased the slayer.
"You probably don't wanna know too much. Other than the bad stuff I
did, which you already know too well, the rest doesn't need to be
said. The past should be the past." Faith opened the oven to check
on the chicken. Her face a mask of indifference.
"If you keep hiding behind that wall, someone just might surprise you
one day and knock it down," Willow said with a bit of mirth in her
voice. But they both knew her observation was serious. "So many
years, Red, I didn't have anyone, y'know, so opening up is hard for
me. But it is on my list."
"Yeah, about that list, Faith. Care to share with me what your three
big things are. You can always think of it as tackling one of them
if you want. And I promise I won't judge you. I did enough of that
in high school. And now I know there is darkness in everyone. So
you can talk to me." Willow stared into Faith's eyes trying to
convey the earnestness of her admission.
"So, Red, we can get back to the darkness thing later because you
were gonna share your story with me, too. So just don't think I
forgot."
"How could I? But we can do a quid pro quo thing. For each big
thing you tell me I will add more to my story. Sound good?"
In a tiny voice Faith agreed to Willow's deal. She truly had never
had anyone she could share her feelings with. Really until the
Scoobies she thought that any emotions she had, had shut down long
ago. But the night she killed Finch, she realized that you can push
them away, but your feelings will always be with you.
"So, uhhh.my parents weren't all that great. I grew up in South
Boston in government housing. My mom was 14 when she had me and my
Dad came and went. He was only 16 when I was born. So they had no
business having a kid when they were just kids. I think my Mom did
the best she could. Her Mom had thrown her out when she found out I
was coming. From things my Mom said I think my grandparents were
loaded, but I never met them so I don't know." She paused taking a
breath. She had just let all of that spill out with inhaling. She
felt lighter somehow. She had always been conscious of her origins.
She just prayed that Willow wouldn't just think she was trash.
"That must have been hard on both your parents. I mean remember us
at 16, no way I could have raised a baby." The look Willow was
giving Faith was full of honest compassion. She saw no pity or
revulsion. Bolstered by this, she continued her story.
"Yeah, I think my Mom kind of knew she wasn't ready, but by the time
she found out she was pregnant it was too late for an abortion. She
named me Faith because she felt like if she believed she could do
right by me she would. I was her faith in herself. But that changed
when I was seven. My folks had been together on and off. And
everyone on the block knew my Dad was dealing. He was a go to kinda
guy. Nobody dared to fuck with him. Well, maybe one person did
dare, because he was found dead in an alley two days after my seventh
birthday." She looked down as she finished her sentence.
Willow wasn't sure what to say. But she knew she needed to comfort
Faith or the girl would just break down and feel alone again. "That
must have been devastating for such a little girl. I can't even
imagine. Oh, Faith, this may sound weird, but if you need a hug I am
here." Faith jerked her head up toward the witch. A hug, that would
be odd now wouldn't it. Maybe it could be oddly comforting. Slowly
the slayer moved her chair toward Willow. As Willow reached to
enclose Faith in her arms all thought of dinner had evaporated.
There was a friendship forming that could last their lives if they
let it.
The only word Faith could think of to describe feeling wrapped up by
the witch was safe. She hadn't felt safe in so long. All of the
heartbreak of losing her Daddy boiled to the surface as she began to
sniffle. As the sniffling increased it gave way to tears. She
mewled into Willow's neck where she had buried her head. Willow only
held her tighter. She had felt this pain when she lost Tara. Tears
may not be the cure all, but they did go a long way to healing your
soul, she thought.
About ten minutes had past as the slayer's tears began to subside.
She smelled the quickly burning chicken and jumped from her chair
startling Willow. "Oh, crap, I forgot about dinner!" She opened the
oven door and without thinking reached for the chicken. "Faith, stop,
you don't want a nasty burn. Let me find some pot holders."
Faith looked up at Willow still feeling tranquil and maybe even
loved. She had really only experienced the love that friendship
could bring from Buffy and that had been all too brief. Finding the
pot holders Willow shooed Faith away and took control of the
chicken. It's not too bad, she thought and motioned for Faith to
begin setting the table.
Dinner was sedate. Afterwards they washed the dishes together and
decided to go to Faith's room to talk some more. Faith also wanted
to show Willow some pictures of her parents.
As they lay elbows down across the bed sideways, Faith showed Willow
a picture of a petite woman holding a very chubby baby. The woman
was smiling and tickling under the baby's chin. "You were so
adorable, who knew it wouldn't last," said Willow taunting Faith.
Faith shrugged the rib off good naturedly and handed Willow a picture
of both of her parents. The woman was sitting on this man's lap.
The man could only be described as tall, dark, and handsome. That
must be where Faith got all her features Willow thought. "You so
look like your Dad!"
"Yeah, I still do. My Mom always told me I was a carbon copy of
him. After he died she just couldn't take looking at me. I became
her curse, a constant reminder of what she had lost. I did
everything I could think of to make her keep loving me, but it didn't
work. She just became more and more distant. I got pulled out of
school one afternoon by social services. My Mom had been committed
for attacking a police officer. I guess she just couldn't live in a
world that he wasn't in. So I got shuffled from foster home to
foster home."
"That just sounds like it sucked. Where is your Mom now?
"It did suck, Red, it sure did. If I wasn't getting the shit kicked
out of me at one place, I had some guy who wanted me to call him
Daddy feeling me up. I got out when I was fourteen, that's when my
Watcher found me. And my Mom I think still lives in a halfway house
in Southie. And she still doesn't wanna see me." Faith breathed
feeling relieved. That was the meat of it, the rest could come in
snippets, but she definitely felt better. "Okay, witch, I spilled so
you have to finish."
"I guess I need to tell you what I did to Glory. I went after her, I
hurt her, too, but in the end Buffy had to save me. I couldn't beat
Glory with magic. I thought I would feel better about getting
revenge and I did for a little while. Then I looked in to my baby's
eyes and knew she wouldn't have wanted that. I pushed that feeling
down and resolved to be the most powerful witch I could so no one
could mess with anyone I loved again,"
Willow said resolutely.
"Go on."
"After that I was able to use dark magic to get Tara back again. At
that point with Buffy gone and all of us so devastated I decided to
be the one in charge. I was hurting so much inside, but I couldn't
show it. We decided to bring Buffy back, more to the point, I pushed
everyone into that decision. When she came back she was different,
cold like I said before. It finally came out where she had been and
I lost it. It was all my fault. The night before I tried to stop a
fight with Tara by erasing her memory. Always a bad idea, right?!
Well, I didn't think so. And proceeded to do a spell to erase both
Buffy and Tara's memories. I ended up erasing everyone's, putting us
in danger, and Tara left me. She was right to do it, but it ripped me
in half." Willow's lip began trembling as she tried to stave off
tears. Faith reached out and put her arm over Willow's back and
said,"There, there, it's okay now."
"Willow, I think that might just be enough for tonight don't you
think?"
"Yeah, we should both get a good night's sleep if I am going to put
Angel's soul back in his body tomorrow.
With that both women got up, hugged each other tightly and prepared
for bed.
TBC
Faith had put the chicken in to bake twenty minutes prior and was
steaming the vegetables as Willow came into kitchen. Looking up from
her task, she motioned to the glass of wine already on the
table. "No time like the present, everything should be ready in
about ten minutes," Faith said reassuring Willow that everything was
under control.
"Well, it smells great! I had no idea there were so many levels to
you. I may have to stick around and find out more about you," Willow
teased the slayer.
"You probably don't wanna know too much. Other than the bad stuff I
did, which you already know too well, the rest doesn't need to be
said. The past should be the past." Faith opened the oven to check
on the chicken. Her face a mask of indifference.
"If you keep hiding behind that wall, someone just might surprise you
one day and knock it down," Willow said with a bit of mirth in her
voice. But they both knew her observation was serious. "So many
years, Red, I didn't have anyone, y'know, so opening up is hard for
me. But it is on my list."
"Yeah, about that list, Faith. Care to share with me what your three
big things are. You can always think of it as tackling one of them
if you want. And I promise I won't judge you. I did enough of that
in high school. And now I know there is darkness in everyone. So
you can talk to me." Willow stared into Faith's eyes trying to
convey the earnestness of her admission.
"So, Red, we can get back to the darkness thing later because you
were gonna share your story with me, too. So just don't think I
forgot."
"How could I? But we can do a quid pro quo thing. For each big
thing you tell me I will add more to my story. Sound good?"
In a tiny voice Faith agreed to Willow's deal. She truly had never
had anyone she could share her feelings with. Really until the
Scoobies she thought that any emotions she had, had shut down long
ago. But the night she killed Finch, she realized that you can push
them away, but your feelings will always be with you.
"So, uhhh.my parents weren't all that great. I grew up in South
Boston in government housing. My mom was 14 when she had me and my
Dad came and went. He was only 16 when I was born. So they had no
business having a kid when they were just kids. I think my Mom did
the best she could. Her Mom had thrown her out when she found out I
was coming. From things my Mom said I think my grandparents were
loaded, but I never met them so I don't know." She paused taking a
breath. She had just let all of that spill out with inhaling. She
felt lighter somehow. She had always been conscious of her origins.
She just prayed that Willow wouldn't just think she was trash.
"That must have been hard on both your parents. I mean remember us
at 16, no way I could have raised a baby." The look Willow was
giving Faith was full of honest compassion. She saw no pity or
revulsion. Bolstered by this, she continued her story.
"Yeah, I think my Mom kind of knew she wasn't ready, but by the time
she found out she was pregnant it was too late for an abortion. She
named me Faith because she felt like if she believed she could do
right by me she would. I was her faith in herself. But that changed
when I was seven. My folks had been together on and off. And
everyone on the block knew my Dad was dealing. He was a go to kinda
guy. Nobody dared to fuck with him. Well, maybe one person did
dare, because he was found dead in an alley two days after my seventh
birthday." She looked down as she finished her sentence.
Willow wasn't sure what to say. But she knew she needed to comfort
Faith or the girl would just break down and feel alone again. "That
must have been devastating for such a little girl. I can't even
imagine. Oh, Faith, this may sound weird, but if you need a hug I am
here." Faith jerked her head up toward the witch. A hug, that would
be odd now wouldn't it. Maybe it could be oddly comforting. Slowly
the slayer moved her chair toward Willow. As Willow reached to
enclose Faith in her arms all thought of dinner had evaporated.
There was a friendship forming that could last their lives if they
let it.
The only word Faith could think of to describe feeling wrapped up by
the witch was safe. She hadn't felt safe in so long. All of the
heartbreak of losing her Daddy boiled to the surface as she began to
sniffle. As the sniffling increased it gave way to tears. She
mewled into Willow's neck where she had buried her head. Willow only
held her tighter. She had felt this pain when she lost Tara. Tears
may not be the cure all, but they did go a long way to healing your
soul, she thought.
About ten minutes had past as the slayer's tears began to subside.
She smelled the quickly burning chicken and jumped from her chair
startling Willow. "Oh, crap, I forgot about dinner!" She opened the
oven door and without thinking reached for the chicken. "Faith, stop,
you don't want a nasty burn. Let me find some pot holders."
Faith looked up at Willow still feeling tranquil and maybe even
loved. She had really only experienced the love that friendship
could bring from Buffy and that had been all too brief. Finding the
pot holders Willow shooed Faith away and took control of the
chicken. It's not too bad, she thought and motioned for Faith to
begin setting the table.
Dinner was sedate. Afterwards they washed the dishes together and
decided to go to Faith's room to talk some more. Faith also wanted
to show Willow some pictures of her parents.
As they lay elbows down across the bed sideways, Faith showed Willow
a picture of a petite woman holding a very chubby baby. The woman
was smiling and tickling under the baby's chin. "You were so
adorable, who knew it wouldn't last," said Willow taunting Faith.
Faith shrugged the rib off good naturedly and handed Willow a picture
of both of her parents. The woman was sitting on this man's lap.
The man could only be described as tall, dark, and handsome. That
must be where Faith got all her features Willow thought. "You so
look like your Dad!"
"Yeah, I still do. My Mom always told me I was a carbon copy of
him. After he died she just couldn't take looking at me. I became
her curse, a constant reminder of what she had lost. I did
everything I could think of to make her keep loving me, but it didn't
work. She just became more and more distant. I got pulled out of
school one afternoon by social services. My Mom had been committed
for attacking a police officer. I guess she just couldn't live in a
world that he wasn't in. So I got shuffled from foster home to
foster home."
"That just sounds like it sucked. Where is your Mom now?
"It did suck, Red, it sure did. If I wasn't getting the shit kicked
out of me at one place, I had some guy who wanted me to call him
Daddy feeling me up. I got out when I was fourteen, that's when my
Watcher found me. And my Mom I think still lives in a halfway house
in Southie. And she still doesn't wanna see me." Faith breathed
feeling relieved. That was the meat of it, the rest could come in
snippets, but she definitely felt better. "Okay, witch, I spilled so
you have to finish."
"I guess I need to tell you what I did to Glory. I went after her, I
hurt her, too, but in the end Buffy had to save me. I couldn't beat
Glory with magic. I thought I would feel better about getting
revenge and I did for a little while. Then I looked in to my baby's
eyes and knew she wouldn't have wanted that. I pushed that feeling
down and resolved to be the most powerful witch I could so no one
could mess with anyone I loved again,"
Willow said resolutely.
"Go on."
"After that I was able to use dark magic to get Tara back again. At
that point with Buffy gone and all of us so devastated I decided to
be the one in charge. I was hurting so much inside, but I couldn't
show it. We decided to bring Buffy back, more to the point, I pushed
everyone into that decision. When she came back she was different,
cold like I said before. It finally came out where she had been and
I lost it. It was all my fault. The night before I tried to stop a
fight with Tara by erasing her memory. Always a bad idea, right?!
Well, I didn't think so. And proceeded to do a spell to erase both
Buffy and Tara's memories. I ended up erasing everyone's, putting us
in danger, and Tara left me. She was right to do it, but it ripped me
in half." Willow's lip began trembling as she tried to stave off
tears. Faith reached out and put her arm over Willow's back and
said,"There, there, it's okay now."
"Willow, I think that might just be enough for tonight don't you
think?"
"Yeah, we should both get a good night's sleep if I am going to put
Angel's soul back in his body tomorrow.
With that both women got up, hugged each other tightly and prepared
for bed.
TBC