AUTHOR'S NOTE: I am finally on spring break, so I'll make it my goal to finish this story. Hopefully you'll be satisfied, and sorry I hadn't done it earlier. And I may finish my 'epic' story, Puella, depending on if I get enough ideas to scrape up a satisfying end.

"Alright, I'll take role." Willow announced to the roomful of people in the Summer's living room. Spike snickered. "What? I can't be in charge?" He shook his head and she continued. "Ok, so me and Tara are here. And so is Buffy. Giles and Merlin?" Giles raised his hand and Merton smacked his forehead. "Does you smacking your forehead mean you're not here?" She demanded in a snippy tone.

            "It's Merton, for the last time. It's just like this movie I saw once-,"

            "Anya, Xander, and Lori?" She cut in. Xander and Anya nodded while Lori gazed longingly at Spike. "I guess Lori's here…and Spike is here, what about Tommy?" He winked and pointed at her. She rolled her eyes. "Ok, what have we found out?" Everyone avoided Willow's eyes. "Ok, we found out that we might be able to see him by, uh, pouring flour on him…"

            "Impressive." Spike said with mock seriousness.

            "I'd like to hear your suggestion, then." Xander said.

            "Well, me and Tommy here…er…" He paused. "Decided he wouldn't date Buffy or Dawn." He raced under his breath.

            "I-I'm sorry?" Giles said with a smile.

            "Nothing." Tommy said. He and Spike shared a look.

            "And Giles?" Buffy said trying to take the attention off of Spike.

            "Uh, well, we got into a bit of a scrape up with a vampire…"

            "Which tore my shirt up…" At that point everyone noticed he was wearing Spike's duster over the remains of his shirt.

            "You know, Merton, you're kind of…" Anya started, eyeing him up.

            "Yeah, he is sort of…" Buffy, too, struggled for the right words.

            "Shaggable?" Spike offered.

            "That's it!" Lori said. 

"Alright, what do we do now? Anyone got any research that's…relevant?" Giles scanned the room, searching for at least a little glimmer of hope. "No one?" He sputtered in disgust.

"I can't read Latin." Lori announced, gaining her stares.

"I don't own any books, so I kind of just…read my cereal box." Spike said.

"I was supposed to research?" Buffy said, puzzled.

"GAAAAAH!" Giles let out his frustration. "What is it with you people?"

"You know," Tommy said, "I've heard of this one Island, somewhere in the Pacific, where there're lots of smart people. No, wait, you never grow old. But you might want to go there."

Merton smacked his forehead. "Tommy, please don't make any literary references if you don't know what you're talking about."

"I was just sayin'…" He defended.

Giles cleared his throat. "Back to what I was saying…"

"*Cough*Yelling*Cough*" Spike put in.

"Sorry, what was that?" Giles said.

"Who, me? Nothing. Nothing at all." 

"That's what I thought. So, what do we do? Wait for him?"

"Sure, that sounds like a plan." Anya said then turned to Xander. "What's on TV tonight?"

            "Anya, will you just try and listen to the guy?" Lori said.

            "Oh, now you like him? What happened to the chiseled cheekbones an hour ago?"

            "Lori, I thought you had gotten over me…" Tommy said as Lori blushed.

            "Actually, it was…uh…"

            "Spike. She wants Spike's body. She told me so." Anya finished for her.

            "Really?" Spike said, touching his heart. "You – you think I'm sexy?"

            "Well, yeah…kind of…" She said, keeping her gaze on the floor. Giles, meanwhile, was on the verge of a mental breakdown.

            "GAAAAAAH!" He yelled, then stared at something in the corner, completely silent.

            "Giles?" Buffy called out. "Giles, wake up!" She waved her hand in his face. He then slumped to the floor, unconscious. There were visible red hand marks around his neck.

            "Hey, Vince, what's up?" Tommy said, high-fiveing the air.

            "Tommy, he just killed Mr. Giles!" Merton cried out.

            "No, he's not dead." Willow said, examining his body. "Just asleep."

            "You know what would be funny? If we dressed him up and-," Spike said.

            "How bout no." Xander cut him off.

            "Covered him with whipped cream?" Anya snickered.

            "And took Polaroids!" Dawn said, speaking up for the first time that night.

            "Hello, Vince is in the room right now!" Merton yelled, exasperated.

            "I don't see him." Buffy said then received a punch to the stomach. "Alright, I believe ya." She said, standing up and furiously kicking the air's ass.

            "Your aim is completely off." Spike said under his breath. They all kind of sat around, Buffy fighting, Merton mouthing words then closing his mouth.

            "You want to try this?"

            "No, not really."

            "What happened to the whole, 'I'm in love I'll do anything even stake myself for you'?" Xander asked.

            "Lora likes me now. I can shag her if I want to."

            "Says who?" He shot back.

            "Says her. And Anya just said so."

            "She didn't give you permission-,"

            "I don't need it. Do I, Lora? You are of age, are you not?"

            "Oh, I'm of age all right. And the name is Lori, ok?"

            "Oooooh…I like a girl in charge. Top or bottom?"

            "Don't know…guess we'll have to see…" She said suggestively.

            Merton finally took his attention off of Vince. "Lori, what are you doing? He's a member of the Undead Brigade. You know, the type that takes over the world?"

            "Actually, he's good. He might even get a soul sometime." Tommy said.

            "Yeah." Spike put in.

            "HAAA!!!" Buffy cried finally, covered in sweat. "I think I did it! I think he's dead!"

            "Dude, wake up." Tommy said, poking at something about four inches above the carpet. "You alive in there?" He backed up a step, and then smacked his foot into something obviously hard and invisible. Nothing happened. "Uh huh. He's dead."

            "Well, that was an adventure." Giles said, sitting up and putting his glasses back on.

            "I thought you were unconscious!" Dawn cried out accusingly.

            "No, I was just pretending. I wanted to know if Buffy could…defeat this evil on her own."

            "You liar. You were unconscious."

            "Alright, fine. I was. Happy now? But I did hear that bit about Lori and Spike. What are you thinking young lady? Would your parents approve?"

            "I don't care about them." She said and walked over to Spike. "Do you?"

            "No, not too much. But I can't really answer that fairly, since I don't even know-," He was cut off as Lori kissed him deeply. Xander and Anya took that opportunity to start making out. Tommy and Buffy shrugged, then shared a kiss. Merton grabbed Dawn roughly by the shoulders and kissed her. Willow jumped on Giles, leaving Tara alone.

            "Well, I guess I could clean up this body." She sprang back as she realized he was moving. "Well, I used to be a lesbian…" She said to the air. The next thing anyone knew, a pair of arms wrapped itself around her waist and Tara closed her eyes and enjoyed her invisible kiss.

THE END

NOTE: Pleeeeeease, please review. I want to know how it went. I feel so good now, it's finally through. Who knows, a sequel may be brewing. I just had to give it a sappy Hollywood happy ending. And FlameShadow? The show has been cancelled. It's a thing of the past, sadly.