Sakura feels funny. Not much more can describe it. Shaoran's gotten worse from the time school let out. Got even sicker during the walk to his home. But that sounds awful! He's not going to weaken so much he'll fade away like a ghost. So was I suppose to leave now that Shaoran was asleep? Somehow, that seems wrong.

A boy lay sick and I Sakura Kinomoto abandon him? Nuh-uh! What if he needs the tea? Falls off the bed and hurts himself? I chuckle at that last one. Such a dignified person Shaoran Li is, and to see him tumble off the bed with a loud thud would be indeed a rare show. One I wouldn't want to miss!

I consider my options what could be done to keep myself busy. I search all over for the hiding clock and finally spot it on the messy desk. Hmm, it's a bit late...time to start some of that homework. That seems a workable plan. I could keep half an eye on Shaoran and do my homework too! But first, I need a snack and a warm cup of tea. I go over to Shaoran's desk where a spot is reserved for the tray and gingerly touch the teapot. I yank my hand away with a yelp, indicating that yes, everything inside is still piping hot.

I creep outside to the kitchen. I feel even more foreign as I open unfamiliar cupboards to reveal unfamiliar foods. After much deliberation, I snag a package of sweet biscuits. Shaoran sounds like a scared puppy as I cross his room, dropping the snack beside the teapot. He appears very much like one, with disheveled, damp hair, clammy skin and a twitch. Maybe the homework thing wasn't going to go through. I ease on to the edge of the bed, cloth in hand. I gaze at his dozing face. At one point, I find myself thinking of that observation that girls made about guys: sleeping = adoration. I never saw how full his lashes really were. They seemed to brush his cheeks, so very delicately. The vulnerability was there, as he slept half-consciously. He would never know it; he was the one unaware.

I could just reach out and touch his face and he wouldn't recoil- I feel my face turn hot. Such thoughts! I was going crazy, that's for sure. A few long pats of water on his warm forehead, then I shuffle over to my bag and take out my notebook. I manage to finish my one assignment for the day while sitting on the floor. I finished some of my snack too before my mind wanders off. I prop my chin with my hand as my eyes pass at the door, the wall beside it, then a shut closet beside his wooden dresser. It was pretty small. Or maybe that was the appearance. Maybe the closet could fit more than it actually appeared! I felt my curiosity growing to find out how much space was really in that closet. And I've never seen into a guy's closet before. The closest opportunity I ever had that even resembled a glimpse is with Touya's.

Standing, I feel absolutely daring as I stride to the slightly closet door. But when my hand grips the knob, my confidence wavers. What if Shaoran wakes up? What in the world would I say then? I glance over my shoulder. Still sleeping. Turning attention back to the knob, I found myself trying to talk my hand into swinging open that door.

I'd be real quick. Just pull it open, take a fast peek, and shut it again. Easy as that! But what if something jumps out at me, roaring like a lion? Big, bad news then.... I shake my head and yank on the knob with annoyance. The door almost slams to the side as it flings open, but I catch it with as a gasp before disaster ensues. I sigh a breath of relief.

The world of a guy's closet: not very exciting. Some stacked boxes in the corner, some old toys and old clothes. A tingle of excitement sweeps through me, alongside the apprehension. Feeling disappointment, but satisfaction, my hand prepares to slide the door shut when a glint of cloth catches my attention. I reach for it, my mouth opening when I recognize it. His Captoring robe!

I back out with it and lower myself to the carpet, taking in the intricate details. This is the first time I've ever seen his costume like this. I'm almost always in some degree of terror whenever Shaoran unexpectedly shows up and saves me from a Card. So the fright blocks out the insignificant things, but right this moment, I'm not in that state. My heart is pounding, but I know it's only because of the thrill and there's no threat to my life. I stroke the fine silk, falling into infatuation as I see how much detail was put into creating this battle costume. The stitches, the size of a bright orange strip of cloth...there is nothing out of place! None of the threads are unraveling loose and there aren't any tears in the material! Not even a speck of lint! Boy, if my costumes were like that....wow. Especially the non-lint factor. That'd be cool.

If the costume's in my hands, shouldn't... I scoot over to the open closet, searching the floor for the complimentary object. I find the jeweled hat and pull it on, giggling at my image in the mirror that's hanging on the far wall. I put it back....Right in front of the sword. I stare in fascination. It's exactly like the kimono. No lint. I set the garment on the floor, taking the covered sword. I turn it over, scrutinizing it. This was even better than the robe. I can't help but smile when I bat the tassels on the handle, the marble-like sphere inches above them swinging.

With intense care, I slowly unsheathe the sword, still not believing that such a powerful weapon was really in my very hands. I treat it like glass, my hands trembling when I hold it up to the light. The blade glints, the crimson tassels dangling. I let my arms down, putting the sword in my lap. The sharp edge I can feel pressing, almost cutting into my skin and that freaks me out a bit too much so I replace the cover. I set it gently on the carpet and scoot to the table for my cup of tea. It's lukewarm. The teapot is too. I sigh, but I make another. I wait again for my cup to cool down so I settle at my original spot, picking up the kimono.

How long will I have before I can't see this? When-

"...Heard you might be going back to Hong Kong?"

The question I asked Shaoran earlier burst in my face like a ripe fruit. I had forgot about it. I pull my knees to my body, hugging the robe. Then words Tomoyo had said to me about her schooling at a US university-

"Don't fret, Sakura. We'll surely be able to see each other!" Tomoyo smiled in solace.

I gasp at Shaoran, not believing what I heard. "One week!? That's so soon!"

I shut my already stinging eyes.

"I know, Tomoyo." I smile my best, suppressing my sadness. "We'll meet up again."

Shaoran didn't face me. "Could we not talk about this now?"

When then, Shaoran? When will you bring it up? Half an hour before the plane leaves? I shove away the rising tide of mixed emotions. Anger, sadness, loneliness, panic, uncertainty. Uncertain was the word, all right. A hundred questions crop up at the feeling. When will you really depart? Do I Captor by myself? Am I suppose to find someone else? Have you found another girl already? Shaoran, I need- What if I need-

I can't bear to admit it. I can't! It'd go totally against my world! No sense at all!

What if I need you?

Clamping my head with my hands, I shake it furiously. Tears threaten to leak from my eyes.

I did fine by myself before you sauntered along. I don't need Shaoran Li, I don't need Shaoran Li! He's such a pest. I have Tomoyo and that's good enough. But then-

"Sakura? What- are you doing?"

All thoughts of Shaoran being an idiot vanished in a blink. Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no... I cough a few times, swiping my sleeve across my eyes. "S-Shaoran?" I turn halfway to find him struggling to sit upright. "It's only been-"

"Two hours." Shaoran rubbed his hands on his face, dispelling the lingering sleep.

"T-two?" One look at the clock confirmed it. An hour for the homework, and.....another for the snooping. When it was meant to be two minutes. I laugh, nervousness showing. "Oh, it seems to be. You shouldn't get up! You're-"

"Doing better. I'm feeling a little better." He suddenly squints past me. "My-"

"Tea's cold!" I interject loudly. "You should get yourself another cup. Actually, I can get one for you. Would you like a cup?" I am now acutely aware of the heaviness of the silk in my lap. My leg jerks, my shin knocking against a hard sword handle. I curse in silence, but not at the twinge of pain.

"What are you- Why is my sword out?" Shaoran slides off the mattress, dropping to his knees directly behind me.

My hands tighten on the sleek fabric as I turn back to the closet, my eyes focusing on a small knot in the hardwood floor. Then I wouldn't be seeing his expression. "I-It was out- So I thought I could see it for a minute."

"Outside of those closet doors? Right in the open?" It was clear by his tone that he would not be fooled.

"I-I-I just saw it and picked it up. I wasn't paying attention," I stammer to the wall.

"And my robe!"

I jump a foot high when his face comes into peripheral view. "Th-that-"

"Was out too?" Glassy, but glaring coffee eyes bore into me. He sits his weight right in front of my face so I'm left with no choice but to look at the middle of his shirt. I didn't dare raise my vision to meet his angry glare.

"Why is everything out? Especially my sword! What were you planning to do, chop lettuce with it? And my battle outfit- How were you planning this? Come on over so you can raid my room?" His breath had quickened and I vaguely wonder whether it's from the effects of the fever or his provoked hostility.

"No I don't! You are blowing this out of proportion! All I wanted to do was take a look, not travel the country!"

His voice lost a bit of its explosive edge as he breathed in deep. "And why did you want to venture a look?"

"W-well, I've always thought it seemed really nice and I wanted to see it closer. So I..." My eyes glue to the dark material. I finger the fine stitches, run my hand down the delicately smooth silk. I trace the contrasting ying-yang design and the thick golden lining. I've completely frozen up! This is not a good thing! My lips part open...my voice....why won't it sound?

"Took it from behind the closed doors?" The tempered male finishes sharply.

"Shaoran, I didn't do anything to it. Nothing's happened. It's still in the same shape." I raise it as if he couldn't see it.

Shaoran's fists ball. "You did do something to it! Y-you touched it! You're holding it, which means that y-your scent is all over it and-" His face then flames the deepest shade of crimson I have ever witnessed on him.

"And....what?" I hold my breath.

He teeters back and forth, his hands winding. "And...it'd- if-" In frustration, he shook his head, "when I wear it, it'll remind me of you." He looks down.

I don't think I answer. I think I may have fainted sitting up. When I regain the ability to work my vocal cords, I whisper very strained, "I will miss you so very much when you leave. And everyone. They'll be gone too..." The lines and patterns on the kimono wiggle and blur and when it clears, I see darker stains of green the size of raindrops. I let that image burn freshly into my withering heart. Against my world! Doesn't make any sense!! I don't want to go through this pain! I clutch the softness tighter against my body, pushing my face deep into its depths, letting out a shaky sob.

I want to stay in that isolated world, that one that didn't care so much about loved ones' departures. Like the child that doesn't understand well enough but goes along with whatever Mother instructs because they would be left behind if they didn't follow. But it wasn't like that for me. I wasn't young like that anymore. I had to move on.

The warm fabric unexpectedly moves, and something warmer, firmer, takes its place. I don't want to be seen, not in this pitiful state. I want to flee and hurt and kick something hard. Want to stop so many changing things so much more but have no power at all, no matter how many Cards I collected, no matter how brave I became. More warmth encircles me and I bend my head down, burying my face deep into the compassionate depths.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Oh, please Sakura, stop crying. I can't stand it. I can't stand it either. I swallow hard, trying my best to console her while resisting the urge to break down myself. What in the world just came out of my mouth? Was that a confession?

I grip her shaking form closer. I didn't care about the sword or the robe anymore. In two minutes, everything changed from a petty belongings quarrel to a full-blown emotional ride.

"Tomoyo leaving, no doubt....smart... Kero..."

I snap out of my reverie, realizing Sakura was weeping something. It was muffled, and I only caught on to the last few snatches of words.

"Kero?" I shut my eyes, feeling a wave of heat. I felt lousy enough without the sickness. And I felt halfway decent a minute back. "What about him?"

Sakura's head lifts slightly off my shoulder. "Kero's the only friend left. And even so, he's not exactly a real person. He has to stay a stuffed animal if anyone passes him." Her head drops back down. "Sorry about the robe. And everything else. Oh!" Sakura breaks away -even though I'm not ready- and lays out my kimono beside us. "Forgot about it. Not wrinkled." She tries to smile. Her eyes are red-rimmed and puffy. She looks miserable.

And it was my fault. "It's all right. The whole mess." I apologize as she stands shakily and reaches for the tea tray. She doesn't look at me as I rise too.

"Okay." Hot liquid streams into a cup.

I blink. Something was up. "I um...aren't feeling the best and so I'm bound to say things."

"I know." Sip. No eye contact.

I want to talk more, add something else. But I can't think of anything. Before my brain even registers what my hands are doing, I had placed them on her shoulders. Bad move. Sakura gasps and jerks away hard, and the tea spills onto her. She cries out as both of us jump from the startle.

"Ow, ow!" Sakura instantly clutched her legs, almost dropping her teacup.

"You okay?!" I didn't know what to do. Get some ice? Take her to the bathroom and run the burn over cold water? Or call an ambulance and explain that a girl nearly burned herself to death because I was insane enough to touch her a second time? "What can I do?" I ask nimbly.

She inspects the burn on her legs, which was only some reddened skin. She sighs in relief. "It's fine. I'll be fine."

Will you? I think sadly, considering the hidden connotation. I nod at the open meaning. "Let me help-"

"No!" Sakura shoots out. She immediately looks embarrassed as she wipes her eyes and hastily places the cup on the tray. "I don't want to have another accident."

"Paper towels." I leave and return with some.

"Could I uh-" A faint blush spreads across her cheeks as she gestures to her clothes.

"Clean up? Right. The bathroom is down the hall." I hand her the stack.

"No, I mean...can I borrow something of yours to wear? I-It's too cold walking out in the evening with damp clothes. I'll be leaving soon and I'm sure I won't be done drying by then." She dries herself, then tries the wood floor.

Her request sounds very surreal. No girl had ever worn my clothes before. Not even a jacket, when relatives' babies got cold or something like that. "S-sure." I walk over to the open closet and shoot her a sly look. "Any preferences? Since you've seen through my closet."

Sakura's redness deepens. "I did not! And uh- well no."

"You sure about that?" I sing. It feels better to joke around, to see her smiling again. I flip through my meager array of clothing, eventually handing over a pair of pants and a shirt. She changes in the bathroom.

I appraise her when she comes back in. The pant legs aren't incredibly long, which made tripping down the stairs less of a hazard. While she stuffs her skirt in her bag, I stoop to gather up my robe. The tears that had fallen on it were faded. Then the crazy idea came. "Do you want to try this on?" I blurt.

"Really?" Sakura's green eyes light up even as they crinkle with some puzzlement. She claps her hands. "You won't get mad, right?" She holds out her arms in acceptance.

"Hey, I'm offering. Unless you change your mind." I pretend to snatch it away, my face hot.

"No, no! Let me!" She bounces in her spot.

I ceremoniously hand it to her. She giggles like her usual self and holds it up against her body as she scrutinizes her appearance in the full length mirror. "I think I'll need some help. This kimono's too complex. Look at all these little extras!" She shook the tiny bell on the left sleeve.

"I'll give directions," I say with a smile.

"No peeking!" Sakura closes the curtains on my windows. "You turn around. And shut the door."

It took a short time, and soon forest green was wrapped around her. She stares at the reflection, smoothing over the material. "It's so beautiful. The arms are huge, " she held one up for emphasis, the sleeve hanging, "but it's so nice." She faces me, posing. I have to laugh.

"You...look very pretty." My face heats up for the second time in less than ten minutes. "Even though you look a lot like me, there's some differences." What I did I just say that out loud for?

"What?" She looks down the outfit. "How so?"

My face reddens even more at unspoken observations. "Um....tiny feet. And the hands....way too small....um..." I tap my chin, hoping to come across as thoughtful and not nervous, scrambling for more silliness. "Your hair accessories- Do you want me to go on?"

I love making her laugh. Watching her childish smiles.

"I think I'll pass!" Sakura turns back, twirling a few times. She looks like a spinning green flower. I sigh, loving to see her so carefree. Something I couldn't be. "Take it."

"Huh?"

"The robe. You can borrow it for the night if you like it so much." I look down. I felt so much better, almost in perfect health!

Stopping cold, she stares at me like she had just heard she won the lottery and was expecting the announcer to say any minute that it was all a big fluke. "Are you serious?"

I nod, suddenly feeling very sure. "I'm not going out today."

"Oh thank you so very much!" Sakura throws her arms around in in a hug, holding me longer than I expect. "I'll have to hide this from Kero when I get home." She let out a gasp, jumping back with huge, panicked eyes. "My gosh! Kero! H-home! Don't tell me I was suppose to be-" She finds my clock and a small shriek escapes. "I should have been home almost an hour ago! Oh no no no no! Hoeee!!" Sakura bolts to stuff her belongings from atop the table. She never stops her speedy pace until she was confronted with the challenge of packing in the kimono, and even then it was quick. She simply folded it neatly and found room to squeeze it in.

At the front door, I suddenly felt even more shy. Was I suppose to hug her goodbye? Shake her hand?

She made the decision quickly as she hugs me a second time. "Thanks again for the beautiful robe. Did I mention it was nice?"

"You did." I pleasantly beam. I couldn't help it. "And....you're welcome."

Sakura's sunny smile grows even wider, her eyes softening at my words. "Wow. I think that's the first time you've said that to me. Or anyone, now that I think of it." When she jogs to the the sidewalk, her faint voice calls out, "I'll take good care of it! Don't you worry! It'll see you again!" A wave of the hand, then she ran.


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A/N: What happens when Sakura gets home? Will Shaoran's kimono really see him again? Stay tuned for the next chapter!