The Harm and the Meaning
Christine swiftly covered the ring on her finger with her other hand and recoiled from Erik in brutal horror. "No! But Erik—Erik, please! You have to understand that this is only something...something that I am wearing because he's...He is leaving soon, and—It is entirely a false pretense! There is no harm in it!"
Erik started to move toward her again. The raging fury in his voice was gone and suddenly replaced by a deathly chill. "Oh, there is harm, Christine. There is a great deal of harm."
Christine slowly began to sink further down against the wall and gasped in defense, "No—No..." She still dared not take her eyes from him.
"I don't think you know the meaning of 'harm' Christine." He leaned over in front of her as she slowly lowered herself to the floor. "You can only go so far, you know, my dear. Any further down and you will reach Hell."
She hid her face as he grew closer and turned as far away from him as she could. Her weeping voice was muffled behind her hands. "I know the meaning! I know it! Erik, please, I know it!"
He kneeled down to the floor at her level, yet still managed to loom over her. Roughly, he pulled her hands away and pushed them down, then he grabbed her face with one hand and forced her to turn back to look at him. His voice was a low hiss. "Do you? Is that so? Then tell me, Christine. If this is not harm, what is? What is the worst you could do to me? What is the most you could hurt me? In the name of life and death, my most darling little angel, what is worse than betrayal? I would love to hear your answer." Though her trembling was enough in itself to move her, he did not let her turn her face away from him the slightest fraction.
"I...I don't...I don't know!" She forced out her hands to try and push his arm away. "Erik! I just want to go sleep! I want to sleep! I won't send Raoul the note anymore! I won't write a new one!"
Without letting go of her chin, he easily grabbed both of her wrists together with his free hand and held them in a frozen grip. Gritting his teeth, he spoke through a sneer, "I'm certain you would love to sleep. I'm certain I know who you would love to have join you."
Christine could not even register the terrific shock that jolted her from the harshness of Erik's words. She was only able to stare at him in disbelief with her mouth open and eyes wider than he had ever seen them.
Her speechless reaction did not affect anything in Erik. "Oh, he will sleep, Christine. But not with you. No, never with you. He will join countless others in a much deeper sleep I am so fond of delivering."
Christine was suddenly filled with the strength of panic and, immediately reanimated, she fought wildly to get away. "No! Erik, no! You won't hurt him! You can't!"
He did not let her shift an inch. "But I can. So very easily. And with so much pleasure."
She stopped moving again and looked up at him with a new sense of abhorrence that made her feel she could coldly hate him for being so cruel. "You would kill him because I wrote him a harmless letter?"
Not letting go of her wrists, he slid his other hand down from her face to her neck, and his long, icy fingers gripped around her throat. "You do know nothing of the meaning of harm."
If it was possible, her eyes went even wider. She struggled against him then with all the energy she had left, as if for her life, and started to sob in pounding terror, gasping for breath amid choking tears.
Erik ignored her crying and pressed the two hands he held to his chest over his heart while leaning down more closely over her. "You have not answered my question, Christine. If your letter was harmless, what would you consider harmful?"
She could not think and did not know what he wanted her to say, so she gasped the first thing that came to her mind:
"Death! Death is more harmful!"
"Is it? And you don't think words such as yours in that letter kill me? Every syllable brings death closer to me. You are killing me, Christine. I ask so very little of you, but you continue to thrust daggers into my heart."
"But they are just words, Erik! They mean nothing!" She could barely even focus anymore on his dark shape through her welling tears.
Erik remained an unrelenting statue that only glared down at Christine and continued to hold her by the throat in his cold, stone grip. "But that's not true, Christine. You have spoken words far worse than those that were written. And do not think you can make me believe every word you've said to him meant nothing."
Her eyes blinked rapidly as she tried to look up at him, but she could not make them clear, and they only set upon his mask with a glazed focus. She was stiff now; Past the point of struggling. It took her a long moment...But she began to speak...Quietly at first, but then with building argument and defensiveness, "No, they did not mean nothing...They meant...It meant..." Her voice lowered in volume even more... Something in her was afraid to say it, but she forced out the words regardless:
"I love him! And you...You've no right to..." Her strength did not last long and she quickly trailed off into uncertain silence.
Erik's eyes flashed dangerously, and his grip at her throat instantly tightened to a new level. He leaned down over her... Even closer. "No right? I should say I have a great deal of right, Christine! And you are in no position to object!"
She drew her breath in quickly, afraid that this would be her last...But Erik's clutching fingers were not enough to cut off her air quite yet. All the same, the defiant fear in her eyes grew to stark terror that gave her new resolve to fight against him though with much less sensible movements this time. She screamed as loudly as she could manage, "Let me go! Let me go, Erik!"
Erik was again unphased by her efforts, and instead of letting her go, he began to stand, lifting her up with him by the throat and where he held her hands. "No, Christine. I will never let you go. You should know that well by now!"
She stopped moving again as he dragged her back up against the wall, and she closed her eyes tightly so that she did not have to look at him. "But you will let me go back! After I sleep, you must let me go back..."
He loosened his grip on her throat only a little once she was solid on her feet. "Not this time, Christine."
Her eyes opened slowly and looked at him with stunned disbelief. "What...What do you mean...?"
He let go of her hands and put his hand that he had used to hold hers against the wall by her head. "I mean that you aren't leaving. I can't trust you anymore, Christine."
"You can trust me, Erik! I won't see him ever again; you can watch me send him a note...He's leaving, Erik! He's going to the North Pole! He has to leave soon...I will tell him to go...And he'll go...Please!"
"How accommodating of you, Christine...You will do just about anything to get away from here, won't you?"
That silenced her. She looked away quickly, turning only her eyes as she could not move her head, and though she said nothing, her steady weeping continued.
He studied her intensely. "Yes, I think so...Anything to be with the man you love." He let go of her neck and put that hand on the wall next to the other side of her head, trapping her between his arms. "But you are not allowed to love him, Christine. I won't let you."
She turned her head the moment he had released her. Her words choked and were caught in her throat, "I can't help it, Erik...I do love him...But if you ask it and leave me such a choice, I will send him away!"
"No, you won't. You will only lie to me again."
She shook her head vigorously. "I will not lie!"
He stepped back from her just a little and removed his hands from the wall. "But don't you see, my dear? I can't take that chance."
She let herself relax somewhat as he moved away, but it was not much considering what he had just said. "Erik, give me one more chance, please!"
"No."
Christine, so frustrated now, almost to the point of being angry herself, slowly sank back down to the floor again, her knees buckling beneath her. "I will still love him! And he will...He will love me, too!..."
Erik stepped further back to have a better view of her...And then laughed. "You think so? You think it will be possible for him to still love you? I tell you, love does not exist where I will send him! I know, Christine! I know because I have been there!" Saying thus, he turned around and started in the direction of his own room where he had all he needed to fulfill any man's doom. "You will be quite alone in your love, Christine! Quite alone!"
Christine saw where he was going and jumped to her feet to hurry after him. She knew that if he left her sight, it would mean he was gone and Raoul was as good as murdered. She cried desperately, "Erik, don't hurt him! He will cause no harm if I stay here, just leave him alone!"
Erik stopped suddenly, after he had opened the door, but before passing inside. He did not move at all for a moment and then turned around sharply and glared down at her. "As appealing as that sounds, I don't think such an arrangement would be adequate punishment for your betrayal."
"It is my betrayal! Do not let him suffer for it!" Without thinking twice of her actions, and in fraught need just to keep him there, she grabbed tight hold of one his arms with both her hands. "Erik, please! I am begging you!"
The moment she laid hands on him, Erik jerked his arm back, pulling her past him, and flung her forward through the door of his room and sent her tumbling to the floor. He started in after her and closed off the door behind him, saying grimly, "I don't like beggars."
Erik started to move toward her again. The raging fury in his voice was gone and suddenly replaced by a deathly chill. "Oh, there is harm, Christine. There is a great deal of harm."
Christine slowly began to sink further down against the wall and gasped in defense, "No—No..." She still dared not take her eyes from him.
"I don't think you know the meaning of 'harm' Christine." He leaned over in front of her as she slowly lowered herself to the floor. "You can only go so far, you know, my dear. Any further down and you will reach Hell."
She hid her face as he grew closer and turned as far away from him as she could. Her weeping voice was muffled behind her hands. "I know the meaning! I know it! Erik, please, I know it!"
He kneeled down to the floor at her level, yet still managed to loom over her. Roughly, he pulled her hands away and pushed them down, then he grabbed her face with one hand and forced her to turn back to look at him. His voice was a low hiss. "Do you? Is that so? Then tell me, Christine. If this is not harm, what is? What is the worst you could do to me? What is the most you could hurt me? In the name of life and death, my most darling little angel, what is worse than betrayal? I would love to hear your answer." Though her trembling was enough in itself to move her, he did not let her turn her face away from him the slightest fraction.
"I...I don't...I don't know!" She forced out her hands to try and push his arm away. "Erik! I just want to go sleep! I want to sleep! I won't send Raoul the note anymore! I won't write a new one!"
Without letting go of her chin, he easily grabbed both of her wrists together with his free hand and held them in a frozen grip. Gritting his teeth, he spoke through a sneer, "I'm certain you would love to sleep. I'm certain I know who you would love to have join you."
Christine could not even register the terrific shock that jolted her from the harshness of Erik's words. She was only able to stare at him in disbelief with her mouth open and eyes wider than he had ever seen them.
Her speechless reaction did not affect anything in Erik. "Oh, he will sleep, Christine. But not with you. No, never with you. He will join countless others in a much deeper sleep I am so fond of delivering."
Christine was suddenly filled with the strength of panic and, immediately reanimated, she fought wildly to get away. "No! Erik, no! You won't hurt him! You can't!"
He did not let her shift an inch. "But I can. So very easily. And with so much pleasure."
She stopped moving again and looked up at him with a new sense of abhorrence that made her feel she could coldly hate him for being so cruel. "You would kill him because I wrote him a harmless letter?"
Not letting go of her wrists, he slid his other hand down from her face to her neck, and his long, icy fingers gripped around her throat. "You do know nothing of the meaning of harm."
If it was possible, her eyes went even wider. She struggled against him then with all the energy she had left, as if for her life, and started to sob in pounding terror, gasping for breath amid choking tears.
Erik ignored her crying and pressed the two hands he held to his chest over his heart while leaning down more closely over her. "You have not answered my question, Christine. If your letter was harmless, what would you consider harmful?"
She could not think and did not know what he wanted her to say, so she gasped the first thing that came to her mind:
"Death! Death is more harmful!"
"Is it? And you don't think words such as yours in that letter kill me? Every syllable brings death closer to me. You are killing me, Christine. I ask so very little of you, but you continue to thrust daggers into my heart."
"But they are just words, Erik! They mean nothing!" She could barely even focus anymore on his dark shape through her welling tears.
Erik remained an unrelenting statue that only glared down at Christine and continued to hold her by the throat in his cold, stone grip. "But that's not true, Christine. You have spoken words far worse than those that were written. And do not think you can make me believe every word you've said to him meant nothing."
Her eyes blinked rapidly as she tried to look up at him, but she could not make them clear, and they only set upon his mask with a glazed focus. She was stiff now; Past the point of struggling. It took her a long moment...But she began to speak...Quietly at first, but then with building argument and defensiveness, "No, they did not mean nothing...They meant...It meant..." Her voice lowered in volume even more... Something in her was afraid to say it, but she forced out the words regardless:
"I love him! And you...You've no right to..." Her strength did not last long and she quickly trailed off into uncertain silence.
Erik's eyes flashed dangerously, and his grip at her throat instantly tightened to a new level. He leaned down over her... Even closer. "No right? I should say I have a great deal of right, Christine! And you are in no position to object!"
She drew her breath in quickly, afraid that this would be her last...But Erik's clutching fingers were not enough to cut off her air quite yet. All the same, the defiant fear in her eyes grew to stark terror that gave her new resolve to fight against him though with much less sensible movements this time. She screamed as loudly as she could manage, "Let me go! Let me go, Erik!"
Erik was again unphased by her efforts, and instead of letting her go, he began to stand, lifting her up with him by the throat and where he held her hands. "No, Christine. I will never let you go. You should know that well by now!"
She stopped moving again as he dragged her back up against the wall, and she closed her eyes tightly so that she did not have to look at him. "But you will let me go back! After I sleep, you must let me go back..."
He loosened his grip on her throat only a little once she was solid on her feet. "Not this time, Christine."
Her eyes opened slowly and looked at him with stunned disbelief. "What...What do you mean...?"
He let go of her hands and put his hand that he had used to hold hers against the wall by her head. "I mean that you aren't leaving. I can't trust you anymore, Christine."
"You can trust me, Erik! I won't see him ever again; you can watch me send him a note...He's leaving, Erik! He's going to the North Pole! He has to leave soon...I will tell him to go...And he'll go...Please!"
"How accommodating of you, Christine...You will do just about anything to get away from here, won't you?"
That silenced her. She looked away quickly, turning only her eyes as she could not move her head, and though she said nothing, her steady weeping continued.
He studied her intensely. "Yes, I think so...Anything to be with the man you love." He let go of her neck and put that hand on the wall next to the other side of her head, trapping her between his arms. "But you are not allowed to love him, Christine. I won't let you."
She turned her head the moment he had released her. Her words choked and were caught in her throat, "I can't help it, Erik...I do love him...But if you ask it and leave me such a choice, I will send him away!"
"No, you won't. You will only lie to me again."
She shook her head vigorously. "I will not lie!"
He stepped back from her just a little and removed his hands from the wall. "But don't you see, my dear? I can't take that chance."
She let herself relax somewhat as he moved away, but it was not much considering what he had just said. "Erik, give me one more chance, please!"
"No."
Christine, so frustrated now, almost to the point of being angry herself, slowly sank back down to the floor again, her knees buckling beneath her. "I will still love him! And he will...He will love me, too!..."
Erik stepped further back to have a better view of her...And then laughed. "You think so? You think it will be possible for him to still love you? I tell you, love does not exist where I will send him! I know, Christine! I know because I have been there!" Saying thus, he turned around and started in the direction of his own room where he had all he needed to fulfill any man's doom. "You will be quite alone in your love, Christine! Quite alone!"
Christine saw where he was going and jumped to her feet to hurry after him. She knew that if he left her sight, it would mean he was gone and Raoul was as good as murdered. She cried desperately, "Erik, don't hurt him! He will cause no harm if I stay here, just leave him alone!"
Erik stopped suddenly, after he had opened the door, but before passing inside. He did not move at all for a moment and then turned around sharply and glared down at her. "As appealing as that sounds, I don't think such an arrangement would be adequate punishment for your betrayal."
"It is my betrayal! Do not let him suffer for it!" Without thinking twice of her actions, and in fraught need just to keep him there, she grabbed tight hold of one his arms with both her hands. "Erik, please! I am begging you!"
The moment she laid hands on him, Erik jerked his arm back, pulling her past him, and flung her forward through the door of his room and sent her tumbling to the floor. He started in after her and closed off the door behind him, saying grimly, "I don't like beggars."
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