It's Academy Awards Sunday! Celebrate with an extra-long chapter of "Bad Timing"! And thanks again to everyone who leaves feedback.

Get Off the Stage Already

Cordelia didn't need another drink. She didn't need one, but she sure as hell could use one. What the fuck happened back there? What the hell is her problem? And what's my problem? I just sat there, taking it. When did I become Little Miss Victim?

Dawn was on stage, singing her heart out to a ditty by Brittney Spears. It was nice of her, to save me like that. But I hate the fact that I put myself in the position of needing to be saved. Looks like three years with Mr. Swoop-in-and-save-the-damsel-in-distress has made me soft. I can't forget how to take care of myself. The bartender finally noticed her standing there and she ordered a Raspberry Stoli and Sprite. Cordy turned around for a second to check out Dawn, then turned back to grab her drink.

"That will be $6.75," the demon bartender said.

"Put it on my tab," came a voice from behind her. Angel. Play it cool Cordy. You can do it. Cordelia slowly turned around, leaned back against the bar, and gave Angel a glance before taking a sip of her drink. She didn't say anything though. She swore she had some cool retort on the tip of her tongue, but that was before she had gotten a good look at his eyes. I've seen him day in and day out for years, but I've never seen his eyes look like that before. Look at me like that.

Angel was trying to call on his inner demon, trying to find vestiges of the sensual, predatory creature he once was. Stuttering idiot wasn't really working on Cordelia, it was time to try something new. He got as far as one smoldering good look before his plan backfired. The mistake wasn't the smoldering part, it was the looking part. God, she made him crazy, crazy with want and need and fear and hope and everything that was good and bad about human emotion. Unfortunately, all that emotion brought the Stuttering Idiot in him back to the surface.

"You don't look nice," he blurted out.

Cordelia choked on her drink. She coughed twice. "What?"

Oh shit. What's wrong with you? "I mean, what I said, before, what I said when you came in. I said you looked nice. Well, I take it back. You don't look nice. You look breathtaking." He eyed her warily, hoping he had eased over his blunder.

She rolled her eyes. "I'm breathtaking? Angel, you don't breath."

Good point. "Well yeah. And that's a good thing, or else I would have passed out hours ago, what with all the breathtaking-ness. You look like a—"

Cordelia had a sinking feeling she knew where he was going with that, so she cut him off. "Please don't say a princess." I don't know when I started to hate that word, but I really do.

"No. Not a princess. It's funny. You were Doyle's princess. Groo's princess. Even Lorne lets it slip now and then. But I've never really thought of you that way."

"Gee thanks." It wasn't that Cordelia was fishing for compliments. But she wasn't fishing for insults either.

"Princess," Angel continued, as if he hadn't heard her wounded comment. "It's just not you. Royalty, that implies something distant, removed…"

"Untouchable," Cordy added. Could he be going where she thought he was going?

"Exactly," Angel said, in that smooth voice he had adopted ever since she'd brought up the princess bit. "A princess would be untouchable. And you, you are very," he reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "very," he tipped her chin up with his index finger so she was looking him directly in the eye, "touchable," then used the same finger to trail down her smooth bare arm.

Cordelia didn't smile, didn't laugh, didn't move, didn't think. She did, however, gulp.

Angel leaned in, so his mouth was right up near her ear. "Sometimes," he confided in a low sexy voice that literally made her quiver, "I can't NOT touch you." And then he was leaning down and Cordelia's heart was going to explode out of her chest and she clenched her hands into fists and it was really going to happen and…

Once again, fate was a cruel mistress.

Gunn and Fred walked up. Too late, Fred saw that they were interrupting and tried to tug her boyfriend away. Too late.

"Hey can I get two Bud Lights," Gunn called out over Cordelia's head, to the bartender behind her. "Yo, dawg," he said, sidling up to Angel, "I think someone is trying to get your attention."

It was like Angel hadn't heard. He had quit leaning in, but he was still staring down at Cordelia. She was staring right back at him. Fred noted their preoccupation with each other. "Gunn, I'm not really all that thirsty. Maybe after another song."

"Angel, man, hey. Pay attention. I think your girl is dedicating this song to the one she loves." Somehow the words penetrated Angel's mind, though the haze of Cordelia. He was confused. What the hell is Gunn talking about? Then the music kicked in and all four of them turned towards the stage, where Gunn had been pointing to. There was Buffy. Alone on stage. Staring at Angel.

***********

Buffy wasn't entirely sure about her actions. A few minutes ago, the Karaoke had seemed like a good idea. After all, so far the night had not been going her way. She had gone too far when they were all sitting down. Cordy hadn't been fighting back, so Buffy had come off looking like a real bitch. She had taken a few minutes to regroup and by the time she was focused again, Cordy and Angel were standing way too close over by the bar and Spike was sitting next to her. This is all Spike's fault. If he had just kept his stupid mouth shut. But no, he had to go on and on, about how great "Cordy" was and how she was irresistible. I just wanted to make Angel see me. What better way to get his attention than standing on stage, opening up my heart to him.

On stage now though, Buffy was definitely beginning to regret her decision, especially the song she had chosen. It was cheesy and corny and obvious. But she really needed the message to be clear. So that Angel would get the message. So that Angel, and Spike, and Cordelia would get the message. Maybe, just maybe, so I'll get the message too.

"Looks like we made it,
Look how far we've come my baby,
I'm glad we didn't listen,
Look at what we would be missing…"

Spike's breath, unnecessary though it was, had caught in his throat the moment the Slayer opened her mouth. He knew what was coming, he thought he had prepared himself for it, but it was still like being kicked in the gut. Fuck it he thought, and walked out the door. He may be love's bitch, but he wasn't a glutton for punishment.

"You're still the one I run to,
The one that I belong to,
You're still the one I want for life…"

Cordelia stood silently watching Buffy. She looked good up there. She was so tiny and blond and her voice wasn't too shabby. The words of the song reverberated in her mind. "The one that I belong to". Cordy closed her eyes. It's true. Buffy does belong to Angel and Angel belongs to Buffy. Always and forever. So what the hell am I doing? She couldn't compete with Buffy because there was no competition.

This whole ordeal, it was so…tired. Cordelia was tired. I'm tired of trying to distract Angel. Tired of coming close and always having something happen. I'm tired of comparing myself to the Slayer and always being found wanting. It was time to stop. Cordelia grabbed her drink and glanced at Angel who stared, apparently entranced, at the stage. Then she walked away.

Thirty seconds later there was a tap on her shoulder. Cordelia turned to find Fred. Fred was yelling.

"Where are you going? You can't just walk away. That girl on stage is trying to steal Angel. Fight for him."

Cordelia sighed. "Fred, what are you talking about?"

"Look Cordy, you and Angel, you know that there is something there. Something was about to happen back there, before me and Gunn interrupted and before—"

"Before Slayer Night at the Apollo?" Cordy offered.

"Yes. You need to go back there and finish that moment."

"Fred, sweetie, there was no moment. Nothings going to happen between me and Angel. No matter how much you shout kyerumption and moira in my face. Don't look at me like that. Fine, yes, I admit it. I have feelings, certain feel—Look, I like Angel. A lot. In ways that I shouldn't." Cordy stopped for a breath and watched Fred's face blossom into a huge goofy grin. "Not so fast there."

She set down her drink and used both hands to spin Fred around so she faced the stage. Buffy had just finished the song and was soaking up the crowd's applause. "Look at her. It will always be her for him." Cordelia spun her friend back around to face her. "Don't tell me to fight. I don't want to fight. I shouldn't HAVE to fight. I don't want to MAKE someone love me."

"Cordy, he does lo—"

"Fred, it's done," Cordelia said, swallowing and running a hand through her hair. "I'm just going to stop. I'll forget these feelings and we can all go back to normal." There. That should get Fred off my back. That will solve everything.

Fred snorted. "Oh wow. And people think that I'm the crazy one."

Cordelia couldn't stop herself from arching an eyebrow in response. But that wasn't about to stop Fred from saying what needed to be said. "Cordy, how clueless are you? You can't just wake up one day and snap your fingers and say 'today I'm not going to be in love with Angel anymore.' It doesn't work like that."

"Hey, I didn't say that I was in love," was all Cordelia could bite out before Fred held up her hand, effectively telling her to shut up.

"My turn to talk. Look, it's like, um, it's like a flat tire." Up went that eyebrow of Cordelia's again, this time accompanied by the rolling eyes. Undaunted, Fred continued.  "My cousin Lindsay, she's one of the Louisiana Burkles. Anyway, she once got a flat tire. And she just ignored it. She didn't have a spare, she was way too broke to afford a new tire. SO she just pretended that it never happened. She drove around on a flat tire for three days! Eventually it got so bad that she couldn't steer and she ran right off the road and hit a tree and totaled the car!"

"Is there a point to this story?" Cordelia honestly wasn't trying to be mean. She really just didn't see the point.

"Love is like a flat tire. There's never a good time for it, you never plan on it happening, and it almost always screws up your schedule. But most importantly, you have to deal with it. You can't just ignore it or pretend it isn't happening or think that it will just go away, or, or…"

"Or I'll run off the road and get totaled?" Cordy asked.

"Something like that," Fred said quietly.

"Look Fred. I appreciate your concern. I even appreciate the analogy as helpful as it wasn't. But we're done here. I tried and I failed."

"How have you tried Cordelia? Have you even told him how you feel?"

"No"

"The Cordelia Chase I know and love, the woman who helped drag me back into reality, she wouldn't give up on something she wanted, not without having done everything in her power to have it." Cordelia couldn't help but smile at that. Fred did have a point.

"Now," Fred said, reaching for Cordelia's drink and raising it to her friend's lips. "Take a big sip, square your shoulders, go find Angel and you tell him that, that, um, that if he isn't smart enough to realize how perfect you are for him, then, then he and the Slayer with the bad highlights deserve each other."

Fred really was a genius.

*****************

Just when he thought the night couldn't possibly get more tense or awkward, Angel had turned and seen Buffy staring at him from the stage. At first he was just annoyed, because this was literally like the millionth time something ruined a potential "moment" with Cordy. Then his annoyance turned to confusion. What is with that yearning smile on her face? He focused on the song and the words she was now obviously singing to him. She was…was she…Did Buffy think there was still something between them? She has been pretty touchy. And dinner could have seemed a lot like a date.

"Dude, she wants you so bad," Gunn said, disrupting his thought process.

"You think?"

"Um, yeah. Look at her." How a man could live two and a half centuries and still be so clueless about the female gender was a mystery to Gunn.

"But, I, I think she might be with Spike now," Angel stuttered.

"The Spike she threatened to stake three times tonight? I doubt the line between love and hate is THAT thin. No, man, she's all about you. You don't believe me, ask Cordy. Women can always tell about this shit."

Angel turned to his other side to do just that, but Cordelia was gone. He immediately scanned the room, before the burst of applause momentarily drew his attention back to the stage. Buffy took a bow before making eye contact with him and waggling her finger, telling him to come over.

"See," Gunn said, proud to have been proven right. "Aww yeah. I told you. You gonna hit that shit?"

"Hit?"

"My man, are you gonna get yourself a piece tonight?" Gunn said, hoping to clarify.

"A piece?" Giving up on understanding Gunn, Angel scanned the crowd again, spotting Buffy now walking towards him. This was so not good. He didn't have time to deal with Buffy's unrequited love right now, he had his own possibly unrequited love to take care of. Where the hell is Cordelia? Okay, here's the plan. Tell Buffy nice job, make sure she understands where we are right now (and where we definitely are not), then find Cordy, drag her somewhere no one will ever find us, and end this madness. I'd rather have her laugh in my face and tell me she could never like me like that then go through one more minute of this not knowing.

Buffy reached him, grabbed his hand, and pulled him over to the hall where the bathrooms were. When they reached the relative quiet, she turned to him, still holding on to his hand.

"So did you like," she asked in a husky voice.

"Yeah. You, you're a pretty good singer. I didn't know that about you. You know Buffy, there seems to be a lot we don't know about each other." Like why you are still holding on to my hand.

"I don't know about that, Angel. I take one look in those big brown eyes of yours and I know all that I need to know."

"Um, Buffy, about that, I—"

She gripped his hand tighter and with the other hand, put two fingers on top of his lips. "Shush. It's you and me. You don't need to say anything."

Oh I so clearly DO need to say something Angel thought.

Buffy went on. "Nothing's changed Angel. You heard my song. You're still the one."

"Buffy, meeting you, loving you, it changed my life. It made me realize that –"

Once again he was interrupted. "That we'll always be together. It's destiny." And before Angel could respond to that, she lunged. Angel tried to swallow his shock as Buffy's lips pressed against his, warm, insistent, demanding.

Buffy wasn't consumed in the way Angel's kisses had once made her . She was working too hard at it. This was the kiss that needed to convince Angel, convince him that they still had the magic they had always had.

Angel brought his hands up to Buffy's shoulders in order to push her off of him. But he didn't do that, not right away. The kiss wasn't unpleasant. Her lips, her taste and smell, they brought back memories that he would always carry with him. For seconds, as she snaked her arms around his waist, Angel lost himself in that kiss. Lost himself in the past.

* * *

Cordelia had looked everywhere for Angel. This was getting a little ridiculous. She was finally ready to get her act together and give this thing with Angel a shot and he had disappeared. They hadn't exactly been lucky in the timing department lately. But that's about to change. Cordy couldn't believe it had taken a pep talk from Fred of all people. I can't believe I've been so scared. Since when do I get scared of men? Cordelia squared her shoulders and smiled. She had never been this scared before because the man in question had never mattered so much. So much of her happiness, her very existence, was wrapped up in this one man…pire.

"Hey sweets," came Lorne's dulcet tones. "Can I help you with something?"

Cordy smiled even brighter. "I've had all the help I need tonight, thank you very much. But I seem to have misplaced a certain vampire with a soul. Any ideas?"

"I thought I saw him heading over to the phones by the bathroom." Cordelia nodded and started to move on. "Oh and Princess," Lorne added. "Glad someone finally lit a fire under you. It's about time, kiddo."

Yes, it is about time. Cordy ran her tongue over her teeth as she walked to the back hall. She felt a confidence that had been missing for weeks seep back into her. It was long past time. She wanted the fairy tale and it was about damn time she got it. She wasn't asking for a happy ending, she just wanted something. She wanted one of the covers of her romance novels, she wanted her and Angel doing the whole passionate embrace thing.

She turned the corner and there he was…with Buffy. Here was the trashy romance cover—he had his arms around her and they were kissing in what could only be described as a passionate embrace. The world fell in on top of her.

Cordelia blinked once. It was still there. She couldn't turn her head. She couldn't move her feet. She couldn't close her eyes. She felt like she watched them, frozen, for hours, even though in reality it was probably milliseconds.

This kind of pain, it's unnatural. Visions, demonization, right then Cordy realized those were nothing. They were nothing like feeling your own heart literally break inside your chest. She was dizzy with the pain. The dizziness also might be a result of the whole forgetting to breath thing. She forced herself to suck some air in. Angel twitched and ended the kiss, turning her way, arms still around his ex-lover.

* * *

Angel was about to ease himself out of the kiss. This was a delicate situation. She wasn't the girl he wanted to be having makeout sessions in the back of Caritas with. At the same time, he didn't want to hurt Buffy any more than he had to. She was the girl who he had once loved more than he thought possible. He big blue eyes. Her blond hair. Her pounding heart. Wait a second. That's not her pounding heart. And it certainly isn't mine.

Time slowed to a near stop. He registered the heartbeat. Then he picked up the scent. There was the smells of lavender bubble bath and Clinique. Of raspberry flavored vodka and a hint of baby powder. Underneath all those familiar smells was an even more familiar smell. The smell that made him hot and cold and dizzy and hungry every time he smelled it. Now that smell made him scared. Because he was kissing Buffy and he smelled…Cordelia.

A split second after that came that sound. Not a gasp exactly. Not a sigh. Just a quiet, shocky, hurting breath. He pulled back, pushing against Buffy as he turned to where the sound had come from. There she was.

Angel noted the pain in her eyes. He had only seen that look on her face twice before. Once when he had fired her and once again the day Darla had shown up pregnant. Something inside of him died a little. It might have been hope.

"Cordelia," Buffy said. She waited a beat or two but Cordy didn't say a word. "Can we help you?"

Angel knew then and there that hope had died. He saw the hurt in Cordy's eyes flare at Buffy's words, saw his best friend swallow and look down at her feet. When she looked up again, he didn't recognize her eyes. The hurt was gone. But her eyes were blank. She smiled a smile that Angel hadn't seen in years. It was a bright shiny smile that was hard as nails. He almost started to cry.

"Sorry to interrupt," Cordy said. "I was just, just," she searched blankly for a good excuse and then inspiration struck, "just looking for Spike. Yup, can't find Spike. He's my ride."

"Oh leaving so soon," Buffy said, in a way that made it quite clear that soon couldn't be soon enough. "I guess you have a lot of better things to do than hang out with all of us."

"You know me, Buffy. Places to go, people to see."

Angel had finally disentangled himself from Buffy and her Slayer-grip. He reached out and put his hand on Cordy's shoulder. Just then she flung her head back and closed her eyes. It was a vision. Subconsciously, Cordelia reached for Angel's hand as the horrifying pictures flashed before her eyes. It wasn't until the vision was over that she realized she was gripping for dear life the man who had just torn her dreams apart. She let go of his hand and opened her eyes. Angel pushed her down into a chair and crouched in front of her, stroking her cheek.

For a minute, one seemingly endless moment, their eyes met. Each looked at the other, each looking for some sign, for something; each coming up empty.

"High school kids," Cordelia said, preferring to focus on the matter at hand. "Drinking in that park down on Lee Highway. They're about to stumble into a nest of angry vamps, who seem to have especially brutal preferences for dealing with trespassers."

This, Buffy knew, was something she could handle. The odd looks passing between Angel and Cordy were not. "So Angel and I will go. Do the rescue thing."

Cordelia shook her head. "You'll need everyone. There's lots of them and they aren't amateurs."

"Angel and I aren't amateurs either," Buffy huffed. "WE can handle it."

Angel tried to calm the two women down. "Buffy, we probably should bring—"

Cordy interrupted Angel. "Look. I'm not going to fight with you about this. It may be 'whatever the Slayer says goes' back in Sunnydale, but—"

Then Buffy interrupted Cordy. "Fine. Aughh. You and Fred take Dawn home and anyone who may be remotely useful comes with me and Angel."

By that time, the gang had noticed the commotion and gathered around their three friends. Fred, overhearing Buffy's comment, took exception. "Excuse me. You don't have to live on the Hellmouth to be useful. I go where Gunn goes. And Cordy goes where.."

Cordelia prayed Fred didn't say "Angel," prayed she wouldn't embarrass her like that.

"Cordy goes where the action is," Spike said, appearing out of nowhere, like a guardian angel. "Now what's this I hear about a vision, love?" he asked, coming up and throwing his arm around Cordelia. All she could do was stare at him blankly. "Well lets go help the hopeless and whatnot. Come on, get a move on."