Drake's eyelids fluttered open. "What-"

Launchpad squeezed his cheeks. "Please tell me you're okay."

"I will be if you stop pinching my cheeks!" Drake stood up.

Gosalyn pressed on. "Dad--"

"I'll think about it."

"But-"

"I said I'd think about it!" Drake checked the clock. "It's 6:30 and you haven't eaten! Launchpad, go out and get us something to eat."

"Okie dokie."

Honker turned toward the door. "I better be heading home. My mother's making spagetti and I have to make sure she doesn't put in too much tomato sauce."
*********************************************************************
A few minutes later, Launchpad approached Hamburger Hippo and groaned. "Long line."

"Ah, yes. Quite the annoyance, right?" came a familiar voice. "There's the aggravation of waiting and the reward for said aggravation. Everything in moderation."

"Neutralduck, I presume?" asked Launchpad.

"You presume correctly. You know my name, but what's yours?"

"I'm Launchpad McQuack. Call me LP."

"Okay, LP. I want to ask you a few questions."

"Like what?"

"When Megavolt created the tron splitter, did it or did it not work on Darkwing Duck?"

"You know about that? How?"

"I believe I am the one asking the questions, Launchpad."

"Sorry."

"Quite all right. Just answer the question."

"Um, why?"

"Because I need to know!"

"Why?"

Neutralduck's white feathers turned red. "OK, you dragged it out of me! It's because I'm trying to figure out who I really am!"

"That's a pretty good reason."

"Now will you answer the question? Did the tron splitter work?"

"Yes, it did. It split DW into two beings. One was really nice and the other was really mean."

"Positive and negative, the normal side was only when the two beings were put back together?"

"Yeah, that's right."

"That's all I needed to know. Thank you."

"Neutralduck?"

"Yes?"

"Who exactly are you? What are you doing here?"

"I'm not at liberty to discuss that...right now."

"Why not?"

"Because!" snapped Neutralduck.

"Because why?" inquired the pilot.

"Because I said so!" The mysterious duck yanked his grey fedora down, then stomped off.
********************************************************************************************************
"It has to be Colonel Mustard in the Library with the electric cord," declared Megavolt. He, Quackerjack, Bushroot, and the Liquidator were playing Clue at one of St. Canard's many abandoned warehouses.

"Is electric cord even a weapon?" asked Quackerjack.

"Isn't it?" responded Megavolt. "Or was it the curtain cord?"

"I think you mean rope," commented Bushroot.

"Was it Colonel Mustard in the dusty, dank library who strangled poor Mr. Boddy," inquired the Liquidator. "No! It couldn't have been! I have Colonel Mustard." He revealed his (waterproofed) card.

"Hey!" complained Quackerjack. "I suggested Colonel Mustard on my last turn and no one seemed to have it."

"No, you suggested Miss Scarlet!" snapped Megavolt.

"The butler always does it anyway," the Liquidator quipped.

"But none of the characters is the butler!" protested Bushroot.

"Maybe Mr. Boddy just dropped dead of a heart attack," suggested Quackerjack. He pulled out Mr. Banana Brain. "Or maybe somebody's cheating!"

"Cheating?! I would never cheat my customers!" snapped the Liquidator. "Of course...I have tampered with the competition...but after admitting that, you can't say I'm not honest."

Electric current crackled from Megavolt's hands. "Nobody accuses me of cheating and gets away with it!"

"It's just a game!" argued Bushroot. "It's not worth fighting over!"

The other three answered in unison. "We disagree." They turned on each other. "DIE, CHEATER!"

Bushroot folded his vine-like arms and sighed. "You won't catch me fighting over a silly board game." He turned to the window. "Hey!"

"What?!" came the voices of the other three, annoyed.

Bushroot pointed. "Look outside."

The other three ran to the window and peeked.

Visible in the receding sunlight was Neutralduck. Alone.

"Six out of seven military strategists say four to one are very good odds," the Liquidator announced.

"Maybe I shouldn't have lost my temper back there," Neutralduck whispered to himself. He felt himself being pelted from behind, and spun around.

"It's playtime!" announced Quackerjack gleefully as his toy soldiers fired minature bullets.

Bushroot, never one to just leap into hand-to-hand combat, scratched his purple foliage, releasing a cloud of yellow pollen.

Neutralduck sneezed. "I--" Sneeze. "Hate." Sneeze. "This." Sneeze. "Hay fever." Sneeze. The force of the last sneeze made him flop over.

Fortunately for him, Megavolt had been about to attack. Unable to stop, the electrician crashed into the Liquidator, missing the intended victim by only a few inches. The infamous water-and-electricity reaction ensued.

The dead ringer for Darkwing Duck shielded his neck with one arm and pulled off his cape with the other. He waved the white lining toward the four villains. "I give up!"

Quackerjack's jaw dropped. "Why did we run from this guy anyway?"

Negaduck approached. "Where were you when I needed you?!" He caught sight of their prisoner. "But then again, you can actually do something right. For once."

"Has anyone told you you're a despicable conniving vulture?" hissed Neutralduck, teeth gritting.

"Oh, now you'll make me blush," retorted Negaduck with a smirk.
************************************************************************
"So why haven't I met your parents?" demanded Gosalyn. "Is it because you haven't kept in touch?"

"Oh, I've kept in touch."

"Even as Darkwing Duck?"

"Yes. We wrote long letters back and forth. I was vague about my chosen career, though. Kept a PO box before we moved here. Whenever a crook would try to steal postage stamps -- don't ask why -- I'd apprehend them and when they were gone, I'd check my mail. Sometimes I'd call. After I adopted you, I began having weekly visits with them."

"Do they know about me?" asked Gosalyn.

"Oh, yes. I told them about you -- excluding how we met -- and showed them pictures. They said they'd like to meet you."

"Why haven't you introduced me?" the nine year old asked. "Are you ashamed of me?"

"Of course not, Gos. It's just that you were really close to your grandfather and I didn't...want you to think I was trying to replace him."

"Oh, Dad."

"Go ahead and call them if you want. Look under Mallard."

Gosalyn flipped the phone book open to Mallard. The only two listings were her father's name and "R and A". She picked up the phone and dialed the latter. It rang twice.

"Hello?" came a female voice.

"Hi. It's your adoptive granddaughter. Gosalyn."

To be continued