Chapter 7: Leprechauns!
That night, the young Draco Malfoy slipped out of Slytherin to check on the secret stash. He didn't have Sculder with him, because she was still down at the girls' toilets cleaning. Mr. Malfoy crept oh, so silently down the stairs in his dark bedclothes. He wished ever so much that he had Harry's invisibility cloak, Draco certainly wasn't the best at sneaking around in the dark.
Soon, Malfoy was down in the damp, dank dungeons where the little Ziploc bags lay. Draco smiled, with a twinkle in his eye as he opened the vault. Inside there were the glistening illegal drugs. Malfoy wondered if Voldemort would notice if he just took a little bit of crack back to bed with him. He decided it was okay, and slowly took the little baggie out of the vault. Draco took a sniff. It smelled like wet, hot, sex in the shower early in the morning. Then, smiling, he took another sniff, getting himself just that little bit higher.
Then, suddenly, in came the dark lord, Voldemort. "Draco Malfoy! What are you doing!" the lord's voice filled the room.
Little Malfoy jumped, and in a very drugged voice said, "Who's yo daddy?"
"Pardon me? You dare mock me!" Voldemort cried.
"Who's yo daddy?" Malfoy exclaimed, and ran out of the room with the baggie of cocaine in his palm.
Voldemort sighed, "It's so hard to find good help these days." He turned to the vault and shut it. Who knows? Maybe Draco will cause an accident? The dark lord smirked and turned away, laughing hysterically.
Draco Malfoy ran up the stairs, seeing things that weren't there, and crying to the sky very disturbing phrases, such as, "I see purple lamp shades! I see purple lampshades!"
Professor Dianne Sculder was coming back from the vigorous toilet scrubbing, when she came upon Mr. Malfoy on his way up the stairs. "Um, Draco, are you okay?" she asked, in a calm voice, turning to him.
Draco stared back with fire in his eyes; he didn't recognize Sculder, considering the crack had warped his small mind. "I...Hate...Leprechauns!" he cried, pointing at Sculder, who did somewhat fit the description quite well. We're talking about a short woman with red hair that was wearing a little green suit and a little green hat to match. Leprechaun!
Sculder stepped back from the boy who was clearly out of his mind. "I, uh," she began whenever she was about to tell somebody something personal that required confidence, "I think you're high, Malfoy. Let's get back to the dorms." Sculder tried to take his hand, but Draco refused, and pushed her away.
"I...Hate...Leprechauns!" Malfoy cried again, taking out a knife he had recently bought from a door-to-door salesman. He began to get closer to Sculder, who seemed to be the victim. Sculder stepped away, first slowly and then she began to run (in her new high heels), with the high wizard at her heels, calling, "I hate leprechauns!" and making attempts to kill the professor.
Sculder and Malfoy continued their little chase until they found themselves outside the Griffindor dorms. Draco stepped back from the door and ran the other way, like he was scared or something. Sculder smiled, "That's right, you little shit! Run!" She watched as the teenager run until he was out of sight. She crossed her arms, proving that she had won, whatever they were trying to achieve. Sculder stood there for a moment, soon realizing that Malfoy had run away for a reason. Down came a little elf-like creature. She gasped, looking at the man that was surprisingly just as short as she was. Sculder ran away, not knowing what to make of this creature. Professor Sculder did not know that she had just come into contact with Dobby the house elf.
Sculder was quickly back at Slytherin. As she opened up the secret door, she realized that the students had a little surprise for her. Each Slytherin pupil held two little eggs in their dirty palms. Sculder shuddered as the eggshells cracked against her robe, and the yolk ran down the green material. Her face went completely purple, and she finally yelled, "That's enough! Things are going to change around here!" Sculder picked up a bucket and a mop. "You will begin scrubbing this room until I pass it off as spotless! Begin!" The children were surprisingly kind and began to scrub as the 'leprechaun' had asked. And by morning, the room was positively sparkling.
End of Chapter 7
=== Okay! Squashed Scully, I know! It'll come soon, I promise. ===
That night, the young Draco Malfoy slipped out of Slytherin to check on the secret stash. He didn't have Sculder with him, because she was still down at the girls' toilets cleaning. Mr. Malfoy crept oh, so silently down the stairs in his dark bedclothes. He wished ever so much that he had Harry's invisibility cloak, Draco certainly wasn't the best at sneaking around in the dark.
Soon, Malfoy was down in the damp, dank dungeons where the little Ziploc bags lay. Draco smiled, with a twinkle in his eye as he opened the vault. Inside there were the glistening illegal drugs. Malfoy wondered if Voldemort would notice if he just took a little bit of crack back to bed with him. He decided it was okay, and slowly took the little baggie out of the vault. Draco took a sniff. It smelled like wet, hot, sex in the shower early in the morning. Then, smiling, he took another sniff, getting himself just that little bit higher.
Then, suddenly, in came the dark lord, Voldemort. "Draco Malfoy! What are you doing!" the lord's voice filled the room.
Little Malfoy jumped, and in a very drugged voice said, "Who's yo daddy?"
"Pardon me? You dare mock me!" Voldemort cried.
"Who's yo daddy?" Malfoy exclaimed, and ran out of the room with the baggie of cocaine in his palm.
Voldemort sighed, "It's so hard to find good help these days." He turned to the vault and shut it. Who knows? Maybe Draco will cause an accident? The dark lord smirked and turned away, laughing hysterically.
Draco Malfoy ran up the stairs, seeing things that weren't there, and crying to the sky very disturbing phrases, such as, "I see purple lamp shades! I see purple lampshades!"
Professor Dianne Sculder was coming back from the vigorous toilet scrubbing, when she came upon Mr. Malfoy on his way up the stairs. "Um, Draco, are you okay?" she asked, in a calm voice, turning to him.
Draco stared back with fire in his eyes; he didn't recognize Sculder, considering the crack had warped his small mind. "I...Hate...Leprechauns!" he cried, pointing at Sculder, who did somewhat fit the description quite well. We're talking about a short woman with red hair that was wearing a little green suit and a little green hat to match. Leprechaun!
Sculder stepped back from the boy who was clearly out of his mind. "I, uh," she began whenever she was about to tell somebody something personal that required confidence, "I think you're high, Malfoy. Let's get back to the dorms." Sculder tried to take his hand, but Draco refused, and pushed her away.
"I...Hate...Leprechauns!" Malfoy cried again, taking out a knife he had recently bought from a door-to-door salesman. He began to get closer to Sculder, who seemed to be the victim. Sculder stepped away, first slowly and then she began to run (in her new high heels), with the high wizard at her heels, calling, "I hate leprechauns!" and making attempts to kill the professor.
Sculder and Malfoy continued their little chase until they found themselves outside the Griffindor dorms. Draco stepped back from the door and ran the other way, like he was scared or something. Sculder smiled, "That's right, you little shit! Run!" She watched as the teenager run until he was out of sight. She crossed her arms, proving that she had won, whatever they were trying to achieve. Sculder stood there for a moment, soon realizing that Malfoy had run away for a reason. Down came a little elf-like creature. She gasped, looking at the man that was surprisingly just as short as she was. Sculder ran away, not knowing what to make of this creature. Professor Sculder did not know that she had just come into contact with Dobby the house elf.
Sculder was quickly back at Slytherin. As she opened up the secret door, she realized that the students had a little surprise for her. Each Slytherin pupil held two little eggs in their dirty palms. Sculder shuddered as the eggshells cracked against her robe, and the yolk ran down the green material. Her face went completely purple, and she finally yelled, "That's enough! Things are going to change around here!" Sculder picked up a bucket and a mop. "You will begin scrubbing this room until I pass it off as spotless! Begin!" The children were surprisingly kind and began to scrub as the 'leprechaun' had asked. And by morning, the room was positively sparkling.
End of Chapter 7
=== Okay! Squashed Scully, I know! It'll come soon, I promise. ===