Rancor Slam

Part 18

Her limbs were like noodles, her head was spinning, and she felt heavy. She laughed. She didn't know why she just laughed until she began to cry.

Well, she did know why. He hated her.

Well no, that was wrong too. He didn't hate her; he could never truly hate her. Or, at least, she though he could never really hate her.

He hated the uncertainty.

He hated the Vong.

He hated the War.

He hated the fact that she was party to it.

He hated leaving Dathomir.

He hated her getting hurt.

He hated her getting married.

He hated her loving a man that wasn't him.

He hater her loving that man enough to marry.

He hated Kir for being that man.

He hated himself for not being Force-sensitive enough to take Kir's place.

He hated wondering if she still loved him, or if she would still love him.

He hated himself for hating it all.

She laughed until sobs rocked her body.

She felt some one grab her from behind and pull her out of the water. A warm towel was wrapped around her as some one pulled her into their lap.

By the strength in person's hands She probably couldn't do anything about it in the state she was in, so she didn't even try to fight. But the person was trying to comfort her any way, so why bother?

She sat there her sobs gradually quieting as the person rocked her back and forth, holding her to their body.

She came back to herself as her sobs dissipated. Master Kyl was holding her on one of the plush benches in her dressing room.

"Master Kyl?" She said as she saw Mere'chen walk back into the room. "Where's Jak?"

"He's in his room, sleeping." Mere'chen answered.

"Why?"

"You took a hit from his emotions." Master Kyl said, "It was so nasty I sent him into a healing trance. It should let him think about things from all the angles. It should help heal him emotionally. Or let him take in and make peace with what's going on."

"I don't like him being treated like a child." Cas said almost angrily.

"Then cancel the wedding, awaken Jak with the fabled kiss, and," She raised an eyebrow, "heal him the way he wants you to heal him."

Cas hesitated and shook her head. "I can't do that to Kir. I'm already pushing him around like a twig. I won't snap what he wants, what we both need, for Jak. He's already uncertain about his rank where I'm concerned, and telling him Jak comes first is not a message I want to give him."

"Then forget this. Get ready. Marry Kir. Be his beautiful, blushing bride. And later, when Jak awakens himself from the trance be there for him." Kyl ran a hand through Cas's hair. "And when you feel comfortable tell them how things are going to be."

Cas looked at her, helplessly for a moment. "What did I do? Why me?"

"You were the amazing, intriguing, beautiful Jedi Knight I know and love."

Cas laughed. "Well," Cas took a shaky breath and gave as brave a smile as she could muster, "I have a wedding to get ready for."