Disclaimer: Now who is really gullible enough to believe that a psychotic seventeen-year-old could own this kick-ass anime series? Anyway, for formality's sake, yeah yeah, I don't own Slayers, I don't own these characters, yadayada. Except for Crisanta and the other non-series peeps. On with the story!
- Theater Time Again -
Chapter 3: Persuasion
"So, Miss Filia, what do you say?" A very glompy-eyed Crisanta asked, hugging the dragon woman's knee.
"Well... um..." She began, balancing out the pros and cons of the gypsy girl's offer. Help out people, good. Having to play opposite the namagomi, bad. Having to work opposite the namagomi in not just any play, but a *romantic* play, very bad. Filia closed her eyes, and shook her head. "I can't, Crisanta. It would be an affront to all I believe in."
The gypsy looked crestfallen. "Mister Xellos?"
Everyone's gaze inadvertently turned to the spot where the Mazoku was nonchalantly floating a few fleeting moments ago. It was empty.
Gourry scratched the side of his head. "Now where did Xellos go?"
Lina fumed, and retorted something about typical Mazoku disappearing when they were most needed.
Crisanta sighed, head bowing in defeat. Dejectedly, she drew out the parchment paper that served as the official pass to the Cyrillan Royal Castle. "I guess this pass isn't so important to you guys, after all," she remarked. "Quite a shame, really. The Phoenix Tear, from what I've heard, is an artifact of great magical power..." Still looking heartbroken, she waved it tantalizingly in the air. Lina and Zel's eyes followed it hungrily.
Amelia looked pleadingly at the priestess of the Fire Dragon King. "Please, Filia-san, won't you reconsider?"
The blond woman shook her head firmly. "My mind is made up, Amelia."
"And this pass (wave) is the only way to (wave) enter the royal castle (wave) without the magical wards (wave) frying you to a crisp, too," Crisanta was going on.
Zelgadis was twitching. Lina's control snapped. "I WANT THAT PASS!!!" she yelled, and made a swipe at it, which the gypsy managed to sidestep with ease.
Swipe. Sidestep. Grab. Miss. Sidestep. Fall.
Needless to say, the activity quickly turned into a free-for-all with Zelgadis and Lina trying to snatch the pass from Crisanta the gypsy, without much success. Did I mention Crisanta gained dodging powers rivalling that of a certain absent lavender-haired Mazoku from years of playing touch football with her theater crew? No? Uh, whatever.
On with the story...
"FIREBALL!!!!" Lina yelled, then stepped back, smoke issuing forth in huge puffy billows from her crispy fried target. She held out her hand to the inert figure lying on the ground. "Alright, Crissy, hand it over and I won't have to do any fur-- what?!"
"You... missed..." A soot-covered and flash fried Zelgadis explained from the floor.
"It wouldn't work, you know," Crisanta commented, sighing from a safe corner of the tent. "I'm Teatro Luna's six-time Touchball Champion."
Lina, Amelia, Zelgadis, and Gourry BLINKED.
Throughout this ordeal, Filia had of course smartly decided that now was a very good time to make herself scarce before a certain flame-haired sorceress noticed her continued existence.
Said flame-haired sorceress slammed one fist into the palm of the other. "That's it!" Lina exclaimed, and resolutely turned to Filia.
Uh-oh.
"And where are you going, Filia dear?" the not-so-endowed sorceress inquired a little too sweetly for the dragon's liking.
Filia smiled innocently. "I ran out of tea, Lina-san. I'm just going out to get some. Ja..." she said, and proceeded to attempt one final sprint to the makeshift door.
"FREEZE ARROW!!!"
....
"Really, everyone, is this necessary?" Filia tried to inquire reasonably from where her feet were planted firmly in place on the ground by a pair of customized ice block boots.
Lina, Crisanta and Zel nodded. Gourry just stared blankly. Amelia shrugged.
The dragon maiden tried another tact. She pointed to the spot where the Mazoku had vanished. "Shouldn't you find him first?"
Lina folded her arms. "We'll deal with him later. For now, though..." She smiled, advancing on the footbound priestess.
Filia resolutely shook her head. "No I won't."
"Yes you will."
Glare. "No. I. Won't."
Equally menacing glare. "Yes. You. Will!" Lina growled through gritted teeth.
Auras clashed. Gazes locked. Filia stared into Lina's eyes, never wavering. Lina stared back.
"Oh, look, it's a staring contest," Gourry commented happily.
...
*~*
Meanwhile, in Wolfpack Island, Lord Beastmaster, Mazoku Lord extraordinaire, sat on her throne, thoroughly engrossed in the activity at hand. Slender fingers caressed the frayed pages of a thick volume. One leg lifted prettily up over the other, propping up the artifact balanced on her knee.
She was busy.
She was not to be disturbed.
She was reading a book.
Well, what? Are there any rules in the Mazoku guidebooks that say they SHOULDN'T read books? Even romance paperbacks?
Zelas chuckled throatily at a particularly, hilariously melodramatic scene some ninety or so pages off the first chapter. Really, the things humans write, so wistfully, prissily hopeful it's pathetic...
However, she was interrupted from her revelry by the sudden surge of dark energy that identified itself as her General-Priest.
Zelas raised an eyebrow as her highest-ranking servant appeared in her throne room. "Why are you here? Did I not tell you to stay with Lina's group until further orders?"
Xellos bowed deeply. "Ah, but something came up, Juuou-sama."
*~*
Back at the tent, two hours, fifteen minutes, and thirty-six seconds later...
Zelgadis looked at his sportsman's watch. "That's it, they broke our record."
"More popcorn?" the blond swordsman offered to the three other people sitting beside him.
"Thanks, Mr. Gourry," Amelia chirped.
"Whoa, they're both good," Crisanta commented, passing the tub.
Zelgadis shrugged, and looked on boredly at the blond dragon and the redhead, still silently engaged in mutual defiant glares. Lina's left brow was twitching. Filia's eyes looked strained. Not very long now... The Chimera thought, allowing the barest shadow of a smile to grace his lips.
Filia blinked.
"Aha! I win!!!" The flame-haired sorceress exclaimed, jumping up, and promptly doing a victory dance around the sweatdropping dragon, who had, consequently, collapsed from sheer exhaustion on the floor.
Crisanta and Zelgadis cheered. "Yes! I knew you could do it, Lina-san!" the gypsy yelled.
"But Miss Lina!!!" Filia protested from the ground (carefully avoiding the puddle of water that accumulated there from the melted freeze arrow).
"It's alright, Miss Filia," Amelia rose up, quick to pat her back while doing Justice Pose #34. "Think about it this way: at least you get to help out Crisanta-san! You should be proud that you're willing to do a deed in the name of justice and righteousness!"
Filia just sat up and buried her head in her arms. "But still, to play opposite the worst enemy of my race!" the dragon wailed.
"No need to act so crushed." Lina stuck out her tongue at her. "It won't be so bad, Filia. You'll see."
Wail.
Crisanta nodded. "It's actually quite fun. You only have about... oh, five kissing scenes to do together."
Louder wailing.
Zelgadis glanced at Crisanta. "Could you maybe insert a scene where Filia gets to beat Xellos to a bloody pulp with a spiked object?"
The gypsy sweatdropped. "It... won't really go well with the story."
Wail.
"Now all we need is to get Xellos to play the part," Lina said, happily oblivious to Filia's wailing. "Where the heck is he, anyway?"
*~*
Back at Wolfpack Island...
"And so you decided to teleport back here," Zelas finished, taking a drag off her cigarette.
"Eh, yes," he replied, grinning his cutest. "At least until this ridiculous affair boils over. You won't mind, would you, mistress?"
Lord Beastmaster shrugged her pretty shoulders. "I can understand the predicament you're in, yes." She blew a smoke ring in his direction, cocked her head, and continued, "But what did you say the play's title was?"
*~*
Back at the tent...
"Where the heck is Xellos, anyway?" Lina asked, now that Filia had been subdued.
As if to answer her question, a purple black bundle suddenly popped into existence from thin air and landed surreptitiously on Gourry's popcorn-occupied lap.
"You rang?" Xellos Metallium inquired, dusting himself off.
"Lina? Who's he?" Gourry asked, pointing to the Mazoku.
The sorceress smacked him upside the head. "That's Xellos, jellyfish for brains!"
"Oh." The swordsman nodded. He proceeded to offer the half-empty popcorn tub to the purple-haired trickster priest. "Popcorn, Xellos?"
"Eh, no," the Mazoku declined. He turned to Crisanta. "Listen, about that... offer..." He seemed to more or less force the words out. "I..."
Filia raised an eyebrow at the namagomi's reluctant behavior. Wait... You don't mean... No! "NO! DON'T SAY IT!" the dragon shrieked.
"I'm in."
Filia wailed. "Noooo..." she moaned weakly.
Xellos' left cheek was twitching mercilessly.
Gourry just shrugged, and polished off the last few kernels of popcorn.
"YES!!!!" Crisanta, Zelgadis, Lina and even Amelia cheered. Said gypsy proceeded to glomp both dragon and Mazoku in one great bear hug for the second time that day.
"Noooooo...." Filia wailed some more. She turned to glare at Xellos, and blinked. Well, at least the piece of trash had the grace to go without his fruitcake grin for one. She proceeded to wail some more, not that anybody in the present company seemed to care.
Xellos, in the meantime, was blearily playing back the rest of his heart to heart with Lord Beastmaster a few minutes ago.
*~*
-- FLASHBACK --
*~*
Zelas started, the copy of whatever book she was holding falling to the floor in her shock. "What did you say the title of the play was, Xellos?" she asked again.
"'The Love Song', mistress," Xellos repeated, bowing deeply.
Lord Beastmaster's eyes narrowed. "The Love Song? You're sure?"
"Certain."
"Oh, my." Composing herself, the Mazoku Lord stretched out a tanned hand towards the book that had fallen. The tome floated easily back to her hand. A predatory smile played upon the features of her perfect face. "Oh, my..." she repeated again. She cradled the book in her arms, eyes falling on the cover. Her smile widened. "Xellos..."
Xellos gave his master a quizzical look. "Er, yes, mistress?"
*~*
-- FLASHBACK --
*~*
Xellos blinked. "'The Love Song'," he whispered. "'The Love Song'!" he repeated, realization lighting his narrow features.
After that, Lord Beastmaster promptly had him teleported back to where Lina-tachi were, without further explanation. He'd had a few fleeting moments to steal a glance to the book Zelas held in hand. The title on the cover, though worn and dog-eared, was quite legible.
The Love Song.
Xellos could feel another cheek twitch coming, and sighed. Then, having nothing better to do, he decided to join Filia in wailing.
"Noooo..."
*~*
Author's Ramblings: Mica here, taking a quick break from my AU fic (JAAUF Chapter 25 is about 33% done...) This chapter is more of a go-between to the next. Have patience, and thanks for feedback! ^_^
BEWARE, OH, BEWAAAAARE THE GIANT BRUSH...
- Theater Time Again -
Chapter 3: Persuasion
"So, Miss Filia, what do you say?" A very glompy-eyed Crisanta asked, hugging the dragon woman's knee.
"Well... um..." She began, balancing out the pros and cons of the gypsy girl's offer. Help out people, good. Having to play opposite the namagomi, bad. Having to work opposite the namagomi in not just any play, but a *romantic* play, very bad. Filia closed her eyes, and shook her head. "I can't, Crisanta. It would be an affront to all I believe in."
The gypsy looked crestfallen. "Mister Xellos?"
Everyone's gaze inadvertently turned to the spot where the Mazoku was nonchalantly floating a few fleeting moments ago. It was empty.
Gourry scratched the side of his head. "Now where did Xellos go?"
Lina fumed, and retorted something about typical Mazoku disappearing when they were most needed.
Crisanta sighed, head bowing in defeat. Dejectedly, she drew out the parchment paper that served as the official pass to the Cyrillan Royal Castle. "I guess this pass isn't so important to you guys, after all," she remarked. "Quite a shame, really. The Phoenix Tear, from what I've heard, is an artifact of great magical power..." Still looking heartbroken, she waved it tantalizingly in the air. Lina and Zel's eyes followed it hungrily.
Amelia looked pleadingly at the priestess of the Fire Dragon King. "Please, Filia-san, won't you reconsider?"
The blond woman shook her head firmly. "My mind is made up, Amelia."
"And this pass (wave) is the only way to (wave) enter the royal castle (wave) without the magical wards (wave) frying you to a crisp, too," Crisanta was going on.
Zelgadis was twitching. Lina's control snapped. "I WANT THAT PASS!!!" she yelled, and made a swipe at it, which the gypsy managed to sidestep with ease.
Swipe. Sidestep. Grab. Miss. Sidestep. Fall.
Needless to say, the activity quickly turned into a free-for-all with Zelgadis and Lina trying to snatch the pass from Crisanta the gypsy, without much success. Did I mention Crisanta gained dodging powers rivalling that of a certain absent lavender-haired Mazoku from years of playing touch football with her theater crew? No? Uh, whatever.
On with the story...
"FIREBALL!!!!" Lina yelled, then stepped back, smoke issuing forth in huge puffy billows from her crispy fried target. She held out her hand to the inert figure lying on the ground. "Alright, Crissy, hand it over and I won't have to do any fur-- what?!"
"You... missed..." A soot-covered and flash fried Zelgadis explained from the floor.
"It wouldn't work, you know," Crisanta commented, sighing from a safe corner of the tent. "I'm Teatro Luna's six-time Touchball Champion."
Lina, Amelia, Zelgadis, and Gourry BLINKED.
Throughout this ordeal, Filia had of course smartly decided that now was a very good time to make herself scarce before a certain flame-haired sorceress noticed her continued existence.
Said flame-haired sorceress slammed one fist into the palm of the other. "That's it!" Lina exclaimed, and resolutely turned to Filia.
Uh-oh.
"And where are you going, Filia dear?" the not-so-endowed sorceress inquired a little too sweetly for the dragon's liking.
Filia smiled innocently. "I ran out of tea, Lina-san. I'm just going out to get some. Ja..." she said, and proceeded to attempt one final sprint to the makeshift door.
"FREEZE ARROW!!!"
....
"Really, everyone, is this necessary?" Filia tried to inquire reasonably from where her feet were planted firmly in place on the ground by a pair of customized ice block boots.
Lina, Crisanta and Zel nodded. Gourry just stared blankly. Amelia shrugged.
The dragon maiden tried another tact. She pointed to the spot where the Mazoku had vanished. "Shouldn't you find him first?"
Lina folded her arms. "We'll deal with him later. For now, though..." She smiled, advancing on the footbound priestess.
Filia resolutely shook her head. "No I won't."
"Yes you will."
Glare. "No. I. Won't."
Equally menacing glare. "Yes. You. Will!" Lina growled through gritted teeth.
Auras clashed. Gazes locked. Filia stared into Lina's eyes, never wavering. Lina stared back.
"Oh, look, it's a staring contest," Gourry commented happily.
...
*~*
Meanwhile, in Wolfpack Island, Lord Beastmaster, Mazoku Lord extraordinaire, sat on her throne, thoroughly engrossed in the activity at hand. Slender fingers caressed the frayed pages of a thick volume. One leg lifted prettily up over the other, propping up the artifact balanced on her knee.
She was busy.
She was not to be disturbed.
She was reading a book.
Well, what? Are there any rules in the Mazoku guidebooks that say they SHOULDN'T read books? Even romance paperbacks?
Zelas chuckled throatily at a particularly, hilariously melodramatic scene some ninety or so pages off the first chapter. Really, the things humans write, so wistfully, prissily hopeful it's pathetic...
However, she was interrupted from her revelry by the sudden surge of dark energy that identified itself as her General-Priest.
Zelas raised an eyebrow as her highest-ranking servant appeared in her throne room. "Why are you here? Did I not tell you to stay with Lina's group until further orders?"
Xellos bowed deeply. "Ah, but something came up, Juuou-sama."
*~*
Back at the tent, two hours, fifteen minutes, and thirty-six seconds later...
Zelgadis looked at his sportsman's watch. "That's it, they broke our record."
"More popcorn?" the blond swordsman offered to the three other people sitting beside him.
"Thanks, Mr. Gourry," Amelia chirped.
"Whoa, they're both good," Crisanta commented, passing the tub.
Zelgadis shrugged, and looked on boredly at the blond dragon and the redhead, still silently engaged in mutual defiant glares. Lina's left brow was twitching. Filia's eyes looked strained. Not very long now... The Chimera thought, allowing the barest shadow of a smile to grace his lips.
Filia blinked.
"Aha! I win!!!" The flame-haired sorceress exclaimed, jumping up, and promptly doing a victory dance around the sweatdropping dragon, who had, consequently, collapsed from sheer exhaustion on the floor.
Crisanta and Zelgadis cheered. "Yes! I knew you could do it, Lina-san!" the gypsy yelled.
"But Miss Lina!!!" Filia protested from the ground (carefully avoiding the puddle of water that accumulated there from the melted freeze arrow).
"It's alright, Miss Filia," Amelia rose up, quick to pat her back while doing Justice Pose #34. "Think about it this way: at least you get to help out Crisanta-san! You should be proud that you're willing to do a deed in the name of justice and righteousness!"
Filia just sat up and buried her head in her arms. "But still, to play opposite the worst enemy of my race!" the dragon wailed.
"No need to act so crushed." Lina stuck out her tongue at her. "It won't be so bad, Filia. You'll see."
Wail.
Crisanta nodded. "It's actually quite fun. You only have about... oh, five kissing scenes to do together."
Louder wailing.
Zelgadis glanced at Crisanta. "Could you maybe insert a scene where Filia gets to beat Xellos to a bloody pulp with a spiked object?"
The gypsy sweatdropped. "It... won't really go well with the story."
Wail.
"Now all we need is to get Xellos to play the part," Lina said, happily oblivious to Filia's wailing. "Where the heck is he, anyway?"
*~*
Back at Wolfpack Island...
"And so you decided to teleport back here," Zelas finished, taking a drag off her cigarette.
"Eh, yes," he replied, grinning his cutest. "At least until this ridiculous affair boils over. You won't mind, would you, mistress?"
Lord Beastmaster shrugged her pretty shoulders. "I can understand the predicament you're in, yes." She blew a smoke ring in his direction, cocked her head, and continued, "But what did you say the play's title was?"
*~*
Back at the tent...
"Where the heck is Xellos, anyway?" Lina asked, now that Filia had been subdued.
As if to answer her question, a purple black bundle suddenly popped into existence from thin air and landed surreptitiously on Gourry's popcorn-occupied lap.
"You rang?" Xellos Metallium inquired, dusting himself off.
"Lina? Who's he?" Gourry asked, pointing to the Mazoku.
The sorceress smacked him upside the head. "That's Xellos, jellyfish for brains!"
"Oh." The swordsman nodded. He proceeded to offer the half-empty popcorn tub to the purple-haired trickster priest. "Popcorn, Xellos?"
"Eh, no," the Mazoku declined. He turned to Crisanta. "Listen, about that... offer..." He seemed to more or less force the words out. "I..."
Filia raised an eyebrow at the namagomi's reluctant behavior. Wait... You don't mean... No! "NO! DON'T SAY IT!" the dragon shrieked.
"I'm in."
Filia wailed. "Noooo..." she moaned weakly.
Xellos' left cheek was twitching mercilessly.
Gourry just shrugged, and polished off the last few kernels of popcorn.
"YES!!!!" Crisanta, Zelgadis, Lina and even Amelia cheered. Said gypsy proceeded to glomp both dragon and Mazoku in one great bear hug for the second time that day.
"Noooooo...." Filia wailed some more. She turned to glare at Xellos, and blinked. Well, at least the piece of trash had the grace to go without his fruitcake grin for one. She proceeded to wail some more, not that anybody in the present company seemed to care.
Xellos, in the meantime, was blearily playing back the rest of his heart to heart with Lord Beastmaster a few minutes ago.
*~*
-- FLASHBACK --
*~*
Zelas started, the copy of whatever book she was holding falling to the floor in her shock. "What did you say the title of the play was, Xellos?" she asked again.
"'The Love Song', mistress," Xellos repeated, bowing deeply.
Lord Beastmaster's eyes narrowed. "The Love Song? You're sure?"
"Certain."
"Oh, my." Composing herself, the Mazoku Lord stretched out a tanned hand towards the book that had fallen. The tome floated easily back to her hand. A predatory smile played upon the features of her perfect face. "Oh, my..." she repeated again. She cradled the book in her arms, eyes falling on the cover. Her smile widened. "Xellos..."
Xellos gave his master a quizzical look. "Er, yes, mistress?"
*~*
-- FLASHBACK --
*~*
Xellos blinked. "'The Love Song'," he whispered. "'The Love Song'!" he repeated, realization lighting his narrow features.
After that, Lord Beastmaster promptly had him teleported back to where Lina-tachi were, without further explanation. He'd had a few fleeting moments to steal a glance to the book Zelas held in hand. The title on the cover, though worn and dog-eared, was quite legible.
The Love Song.
Xellos could feel another cheek twitch coming, and sighed. Then, having nothing better to do, he decided to join Filia in wailing.
"Noooo..."
*~*
Author's Ramblings: Mica here, taking a quick break from my AU fic (JAAUF Chapter 25 is about 33% done...) This chapter is more of a go-between to the next. Have patience, and thanks for feedback! ^_^
BEWARE, OH, BEWAAAAARE THE GIANT BRUSH...