Chapter 6: Smiling in Grief

As usual, all the details (disclaimer and the rest) can be found attached to Chapter one.

Author's Note: Yeah, yeah, the chapters are coming slower, mainly because real life is trying to take a swing at me. Sigh.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to write a review. Can't say how much I love to read them.

-S

***

Winter was well underway in Colorado. Daniel Jackson gripped his jacket tighter to try and keep himself warm. Christmas was in a few weeks and Daniel had already decided to take a Scrooge outlook to the holiday. Christmas was supposed to be a time to get together with friends and family. Daniel was lacking both of these this year.

Yep, he definitely was taking Christmas off.

Daniel Jackson reached the front door of his apartment building and started to search for his keys. He had just got out of the car, so he couldn't have left them…

Ring, Ring.

Instead, Daniel found his cellphone; it was ringing incessantly to get his attention.

He flipped it open with a look of annoyance, "Hello?"

"Daniel Jackson?" said an unfamiliar voice.

"Yeah?"

"Could you please report to the Mountain, General Hammond's orders."

Great, great, what could possibly have gone wrong in half an hour? --no, never mind, he didn't want to know.

"I'll be there as soon as possible," replied Doctor Jackson. He turned off the phone and walked back towards the parking lot, still searching for his keys. Well, at least the car would still be warm.

***

Daniel heard the General's voice before he even entered the briefing room, "What are you asking for?"

"We need to get him outta there, but we don't have the resources. I'm here to ask for help."

'Was that Jacob Carter?' wondered Daniel. The doctor hadn't seen the Tok'ra since Sam's memorial, which was almost three months ago.

Daniel interrupted the meeting with his usual flare. He came into the room and found three sets of eyes glaring towards him. Under scrutiny, Daniel stumbled out an awkward greeting. He was right; it was Sam's dad, Jacob Carter. Teal'c was also in the room. Teal'c bowed his head slightly in Daniel's direction as a greeting.

"Ah, Doctor Jackson, I thought you should be present for this," said the General, glancing quickly at Jacob. Daniel took the seat next to Teal'c.

Jacob spoke, "One of our undercover operatives, Lateef, has been discovered. We're a little sketchy on the details, but we got a distress signal from him three days ago. Lateef has spent a little over a year as a scribe of a Goa'uld called Nephthys."

Nephthys. Daniel searched through the cluttered library he kept in his head. Finding the desired information, he interrupted Jacob to share his train of thought, "Nephthys was an Egyptian goddess known as the 'Mistress of the House'. She wasn't particularly well-known, although she was the sister and wife of Seth, which makes Isis her sister as well." The General made a slight snorting noise in response to Seth and Isis, two of the "False-gods" that the SGC had already met.

Teal'c raised an eyebrow.

Jacob nodded in agreement to the archeologist's words. "Nephthys has been under the radar of the System Lords for several centuries now. But recently, he's been building up his empire. In the last year alone, he's conquered 10 different planets."

'He?' thought Daniel. 'Nephthys obviously isn't the 'goddess' she was in Ancient Egyptian times.''

Jacob continued, oblivious to the doctor's thoughts. "Lateef has information about Nephthys that is very valuable to the Tok'ra."

General Hammond looked at him questionably. "And the SGC as well," Jacob added.

Teal'c spoke, "And now, Nephthys has an adequate source of information about the Tok'ra."

"Yeah, that too," admitted Jacob, "The truth is, the Tok'ra can't mount up a rescue mission right now…"

A voice from the doorway instantly had the entire room's attention, "So ya come to Earth for a miracle solution, huh?"

Colonel Jack O'Neill always was a bit dramatic. He had been gone for nearly a month, holed up in that cabin of his, and now he was leaning against the doorframe with practiced ease, as if he had never left. 'He looks older,' observed Daniel. The smirk that usually followed one of his sarcastic comments seemed a bit forced.

But he was there, and he was in one piece. Daniel felt a grin tugging at his lips. He was relieved; Jack O'Neill was back. Maybe SG-1 wasn't as lost as he first thought.

***

"Jack."

The Colonel didn't respond. He was in the locker room, readying for the upcoming mission. A mission that could very well be his last… same old, same old.

"Colonel."

Jack sighed as he realized that this wasn't going to be one of those 'if I ignore it, it will go away' things. He looked up at Sam's dad.

"Jacob," he said in acknowledgement. Sam's dad sat down next to him on the bench and looked at him carefully, a stranger would have said that he seemed even suspicious.

Jacob Carter wanted to say something, something personal, but he was on foreign ground here; he didn't know what to say. The Colonel didn't mind the silence. Still, he soon found himself fidgeting under the older man's glaze. He started to pack again.

"I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to talk with you last time I was here," said Jacob finally.

'Probably because I was avoiding all contact with you,' but the Colonel didn't mention that piece of trivia.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'm glad you didn't retire over this, Jack." Then he brought out the big guns… "Sam wouldn't have wanted that."

"Yeah." Jack didn't bother asking how Jacob knew about the retirement plan. Jacob was the all-knowing Tok'ra… Hammond had probably mentioned it.

There was a guilt that had been weighing heavily on Jack's mind. And, unfortunately, Jack's mouth blurted it out without consulting him. His voice was almost a whisper. "It's my fault. Carter death… and now, everything's just gone to hell." Jack stopped talking, realizing that his voice was wavering with emotion. He could cry right now… it was a shocking revelation. The Colonel straightened and took several controlled breaths. This was Jacob Carter, for crying out loud, not the sort of person to get emotional around. Not that the Colonel tended to get emotional around anyone.

Jacob sat next to Jack quietly, waiting for him to regain his composure. Jacob wasn't sure of the relationship that had been between his daughter and the Colonel. He assumed that at the very least, it was an extremely close friendship. Selmak thoughts though, seemed to lean towards a love affair… Jacob's arguments concerning professionalism and regulations not withstanding.

It was three months ago that his daughter went missing and it seemed like Jack was still in a lot of pain. 'Why did he come back? Why is he going on this mission?' thought Jacob.

Selmak was quick to offer her opinion, 'Because he wants to die… and what better than to die a hero?'

It was disturbing thought, even more so because it could be true.

While Jacob was busy being retrospective, Jack had put his sarcastic façade back on and had finished packing up his gear.

"Are you sure you wanna do this mission?" He was going to go out there with a death wish.

"Who else is there?" replied Jack. The Colonel turned and walked out of the conversation.

***

"Jack! Jack!" Daniel Jackson ran down the hallway, trying to catch up with the Colonel. They had a briefing in five minutes about the Tok'ra rescue mission.

"Jack!" he shouted again.

The Colonel sighed and froze in his steps. This was just going to be one pity party after another, wasn't it?

"Jack," repeated Daniel as he stopped next to his friend.

"Daniel?" Jack raised his eyebrows, as if questioning his very appearance.

"So," stalled the archeologist, "How you been? You never write, you never call…"

Daniel was wearing a familiar expression. Once again, Jack found himself as a subject of worry.

"Fine, fine. You?" He could shrug this off. He was fine now.

Jack was also an expert at lying, especially to himself.

Daniel wasn't amused. A month ago, Jack O'Neill had been the apotheosis of the man who had lost everything. He'd left, flinging retirement papers in their faces. Now he was back, seemingly ready to take on the galaxy. Stuff like that didn't just happen.

"Fine," Daniel answered.

They kept walking towards the briefing room. They'd talk about the stuff later. Maybe.

"You ready to kick some Goa'uld butt?" asked Jack.

"Definitely."

TBC

***

What's to come, eh? *gives her best "I know something you don't know" look*

Actually, lots of ideas are coming to me… Angst? Happy-ending? Or a nice solution that doesn't really resolve anything…

Okay, my Author Babbling is done now. *g*

-S