In the future I will most likely be updating chapters as I get a chance, so
if one of my posts is really short you will most likely get a follow up to
it. Have also decided to use the personality switches as the breaks in
chapters. So whenever a different personality takes over for an extended
period of time it will be a new chapter. Well, I may get to splice in some
of my Psychology degree. If get too wrapped up in the description of
mental 'issues' just let me know. By the way, the reason Kenshin has yet
to diagnosed is that most cases of MPD are not noticed for at least six
years after they manifest if it is even noticed. Another quick note on
MPD, I am making up some of this as I go since there is very little
information on the signs and symptoms of a multiple personality disorder.
Not to mention publication of an actual case, recently it has been found
that approximately 98% of people with MPD have been miss-diagnosed and
actually have a form of acute schizophrenia. So I will do my best here.
Oh and I added to this chapter, so enjoy. Oh, and I don't own RK, anything
by Queensryche, or any other strange references I might make here.
-----
Sum Of Sin
~Chandra
Kaoru shifted uneasily at the nurses' station; there was something about hospitals that never seemed right. Something in the way they felt, smelled, and sounded. But mostly in the way they smelled. The heavy sterile medicine smell mixed with bittersweet undertones that disease and infection left in its wake, which stuck thickly in the back of your throat. Then there were the memories that florescent lighting and absently detached voices left in their wake. Her father had died in a hospital like this one, not that hospitals looked very different from each other, when she was five. An experience that left her with an astoundingly accurate memory of the smells and sounds of trauma care, and the knowledge of what death meant.
"Ms. Kamiya?" One of those absently detached voices, that surprisingly still held a few characteristics of true humanity and hinted at inexperience, broke into her thoughts.
"Oh...I'm sorry," She stumbled, eyes focusing on the man before her, "Doctor?" And she stopped, realizing she had missed his name.
"Jones." He said, smiling helpfully, adding to the obvious impression that he was fresh out of school.
"It is a pleasure to meet you, Doctor Jones." She smiled, extending her hand as some of the unease drained out of her. "I was sent here by the fifth district court to evaluate a Kenshin Himura's competency to stand trial."
"Yes, I am familiar with the case." A frown unbecomingly creased his face, "He's this way."
The walk was completed in silence, the sterile white hallways leading them through a maze of dehumanization. Finally after passing steel gates that offered to swallow them whole and keep them far from the light of day, they stood outside a plain white door. A small window allowed the only visual access to its confines, and through the metal grated porthole was the offer of insanity. Risking a glance, Kaoru stepped up to the small window. Inside a slender man leaned against the wall, his eyes hidden by unkept hair, its red color a shocking splash of color against artificial white.
"You're patient awaits, Ms. Kamiya." Then with a pause the doctor met her eyes nervously, "We see all sorts come through here, but...I'm not trying to tell you how to do you job." He paused, looking down, and when their eyes met again a pleading urgency accompanied his words. "Just don't let him get away with it." With that he opened the door, not waiting for he to answer, perhaps it was better for him if she didn't. Better for him to believe that some justice still existed, but justice wasn't her job.
"Thank you, Doctor." She said smiling at him, before stepping into the room. As always there was the sickening shock of nervousness that accompanied every evaluation, the instant of dread that sent a painful rush of adrenalin through her blood. Then the lock clicked behind her, leaving her staring at red hair and white walls.
"Good Afternoon, Kenshin." She spoke, hoping her voice was steadier that it sounded in her mind. ~Take a deep breath Kaoru~ her mind chided her ~Never give them control of the situation, as soon as they know they can use you you've lost.~ With a sigh she made a quick glance around the room. A bed, a table, two chairs, and a television mounted near the ceiling behind what looked like clear plastic were the room's simple decorations. Forcing her hands to remain still, she slid into one of chairs and looked up at him.
An almost childish giggle came from the figure as he answered, her. "Kenshin's asleep, Doctor-lady." The man raised his head, long strands of red hair framing a smiling face and playful amethyst eyes. "Can I go home now, Doctor-lady? I don't like this place, it smells funny, and I don't like the food."
She couldn't help it, the man's first words surprised her; leaving her wide- eyed and blinking as the childish banter continued.
"What's you're name?"
"K..Kaoru Kamiya." She stuttered out, opening her pad. She had been warned to expect the telltale signs of a Psychotic (Antisocial Personality Disorder); perhaps this was a game to him, the beginning of a battle of wills that he would use to test her.
"My name's Shinta." He walked towards her, his movements carefree with the sloppy grace of childhood. "Can't I go home now?"
"Not just jet, Shinta. I need to ask you some things, then we'll see." ~There was no mention of the name 'Shinta' in his file~ "Shinta, are you the only one that lives in Kenshin?" The question was an iffy one, on one hand suggesting that there should be other personalities and offered encouragement to some one seeking and insanity plea, but on the other hand it was something she had to know.
"No, there's me and Kenshin, and..." Violet eyes glanced around, widening slightly before he continued in a soft tone. "And there's Him. But he's bad, we don't wan to wake Him up." Then Shinta/Kenshin looked up at her, eyes tearfully wide. "I'm a good boy, aren't I Miss. Kaoru? They say I did bad things, but I'm a good boy! He did it, he makes us do it, we don't want to, I want to be a good by!" His words grew closer together, becoming more frantic with each new thought as they spilled out of him. Amethyst eyes stared pleadingly up at her, seeking reassurance as he hugged himself, rocking back and forth on the chair.
"Hush..." Kaoru stopped herself, realizing her hand was reaching out towards him. But the frightened worlds spoken so much like a child's had made her want to hold him and reassure his cries. "Yes, Shinta. You're a good boy." She knew it was a lie, even as the words came out of her mouth, but she couldn't stop them. "Why don't you take a rest, Shinta, I'm going to go for a little while. I'll be back soon. O.K.?" Despite herself she was responding to him as if he were a child, responding to the wide-eyed fear of rejection that that faced her.
"No, don't leave me. I don't want to be alone." The plea followed her like his eyes as she stood up.
"It's just for a few minutes, I'll be back soon." There was no answer, but instead the boy who called himself 'Shinta' crawled up onto the bed, which he could have easily sat down upon, and curled up into a ball. Three brisk knocks upon the door brought one of the orderlies, and offered her freedom into the seemingly freezing hallway. With a sigh she fell back against the near wall as the door clicked shut, the cool tile feeling frigid against her skin as she closed her eyes. This wasn't going to be easy.
Alone in the cafeteria Kaoru looked down at her notes, feeling ashamed at her loss of control over the situation. But then again, she hadn't been in control of the situation since she walked through the doorway. It had been merely one year since she had completed her degree in Psychology. From the beginning this was what she had wanted to do, to make people accountable for their actions. The insanity plea was nothing more than another excuse offered by a flawed legal system to allow the guilty their freedom. Out of the seven evaluations she had been assigned to, only one had gone free. But she had proven all seven of them capable to stand trial, and with out a law degree it was the best that she could do.
Sighing, Kaoru looked down at her pad, her pen moving over a set of letters as if driven by some need to break the code they held. "Shinta," the name glared back at her from the surface of the legal pad, it's letter bold from her pens constant attention. Her pen moved away from the letters, jotting quick questions below the name and leaving lines of space below the words. Stopping at a final question, it's one word allowing her mind to slide back to a day sixteen years ago.
*** She sat in a large room, the echoes of lamenting voices bouncing off wood paneled walls and a high white ceiling. Carefully she shifted, the wooden pews making her uncomfortable. The smell of flowers surrounded her, thick and heavy as she was lead from her seat, an old hand taking her where she didn't want to go. Silently her mind struggled against the childish innocence that kept her walking towards the coffin. ~No, don't look, you don't want to understand what's there.~ But it was too late and once again she watched to a child's eyes no longer innocent as the understanding of death hardened an accepting heart. Then the room blurred and she was sitting again, hating blue eyes looked out from the child's face focused on a single man. Watching as he was declared "Not Guilty for reasons of Insanity." Then they were leaving, filing out of the courtroom into a crowd. Still she watched his back, tears rolling silently down her cheeks. Then with audacity of some one who knows they just, quite literally, got away with murder, her turned to smile at her. That smile killed the last illusions of child hood just as quickly as his bullet had killed her father ***
"Ms. Kamiya?" A woman's voice started her from the memories, making her jump into sudden alertness. Underneath her skin her blood pumped fervently with the speed of a fresh dose of adrenaline.
"Are you alirght Ms. Kamiya?"
"Yes, thank you." Kaoru smiled, quickly noting the woman's appearance. She wore a typical nurse's uniform, and her features were just as usual as her clothing, just your typical nurse Betty, though Jean seamed to fit her features more.
"Doctor Jones asked me to check on you, you've been gone for nearly two hours." The nurse paused, the secretive smile that accompanies gossip spreading over her face. "I think he was worried that you had left."
"I see, thank you." Though Kaoru really didn't see, not that she cared to get close to the locals as she thought of them. This was work, not a social outlet. "Well I think I will be heading back to complete my evaluation." Kaoru finished, and gathered her things before another attempt at small talk could be made. She was never very good at small talk; perhaps it was because she never understood the use of tact.
This time Kaoru noticed the walls, two-toned with light green on the bottom and a darker puke-green on top. Institutional green, as charming as bruises, it was a wonder any one escaped its colors sane. Florescent lighting made the green claustrophobic, and at that moment Kaoru decided she hated green. White doors kept silent servitude to the halls ways like orderlies of steel and glass. Once more she stood in front of the door, a white 6 was painted to the left of the door handle. Finding strength in her disgust at the psyc. wards decoration she turned the doors knob.
"Kenshin..." Kaoru voice, slide through the white-lit gloom of the room. A gloom not borne from darkness, but more of a feeling that made the world seem an unsteady weight upon her small shoulders. At first glance the room was despairingly empty, lacking the unnatural brightness of the child's eyes, silent in sterile oppression that brought back the daily press of loneliness. A ragged sigh came in a grating rush of air and voice from beside the bed, a corner hidden perfectly from her eyes by the line of the mattress. The sound wrapped around her, echoing off the suddenly close white walls.
"Kenshin..?" She whispered, the air hissing involuntarily from between her teeth. The whisper sounds scared and insecure, and she hated it. She wouldn't be afraid, fear was useless; it didn't change anything, just made you helpless. With newfound resolve that fed of the anger twisting in her stomach, she walked briskly towards the bed, towards the hidden corner and any horror it could hold. In her mind, behind her blue eyes that glared fiercely at he destination, possibilities formed fleeting thoughts intent on frightening her. Steeling herself against the imagined boogieman she stepped clear of the bed, coming face to face with huddled limbs and tangled red hair.
Wide amethyst eyes, their irises flecked with the first amber hints of sorrow driven insanity, stared up at her. Red rimmed their blood shot surface, tangles of red hair falling in matted clumps against a swollen tear streaked face. For a moment it was hard to believe that this was the same person, the same child-like man that had greeted her earlier. In a slow movement his hand raised, knotted fingers unclenching as her push the tangled mass of red roughly away from his face. His slender hands were swollen; fingers caked with a red-brown substance that cracked and flaked off in thick sheets from ragged nails. Kaoru's eyes trailed from his fingers; the smell of drying blood heavy around her, making the cool room seem stifling as her eyes moved down his wrists and forearms.
The pale skin, which had seemed so perfect only hours before, was marred with long tares running in a chaotic pattern from knuckles to elbows. Blood seeped from the encrusted skin in fresh shining red rivers that ran down his elbows and dripped to the floor. So much blood, it filled her vision and suffocating her with its smell. Her mouth moved, but she couldn't find her voice, couldn't find the words that would bridge the gap between silent horror and rational thought. And through it all those red- rimmed eyes stared at her. The look was not a friendly one, but one of accusation screaming at her through the sterile white.
Once again the curled hand tried to push matted red hair away from his eyes, fingers tangling in the strands and leaving streaks of drying red/brown over sickly pale skin. Lips moved carefully, each word seeming to be a struggle before it came in ragged breathless half words. At first she couldn't hear him, couldn't hear anything and her mind filled in the silence with accusing tones. Then like a way crashing over the room sound returned, and his words reached her ears. "Where is she...Where is my wife." Wide-eyed blue stared, unable to give an answer. "Where's Tomoe...?" Questioningly hesitant in its tones, the answer already known, but wide eyes refused to remember. "Where is she?" More frantic now, the first whispers of a nameless fear filling his raspy tones.
Kaoru stepped back, the white wall a solid end to the surreal world. "I don't know, try and calm down Kenshin." Her voice was forced, words tight as she spoke the lie.
"Where's Tomoe?" This time it wasn't hesitant, the scream was as his movements violent. Fingers reached out for her shoulders as he thrust himself forwards his face a bloodied mask devoid of any semblance of humanity, as though there was nothing let than the animal the race evolved from.
Kaoru tried to move, but the lunge was too fast, too unexpected. Fingers curled around her shoulders with their tips digging buisingly into her flesh, His weight pushing her back against the wall, knocking the air from her lings at the impact. Black spots danced infront of her eyes, artificial light fading as darkness reached up to her. Then there was nothing, no impact of the waiting floor...no sound of the scream that should be burning from her throat. Nothing...
-----A/N----- -Chiruken- MPD is a very hard thing to diagnose. Most people who claim MPD in a situation such as Kenshin's are faking the disorder to achieve the insanity plea. There have been cases (that have been proved to be misdiagnosed) of people with over 1000 different 'personalities.' The other thing about MPD is that the core personality (in this case Kenshin) is not aware of the other personalities, and experiences missing time when a different personality is in control. As for Kaoru's nervousness I mentioned some background in the last chapter and will get into it in more detail in the next chapters. Am sorry that "Fade" is taking me so long to update, have half of the next chapter written but am having trouble getting around to finish it. Am having too much mental fun with this idea...I really need a tape recorder. -Val- MPD normally goes for at least six years with out being diagnosed, and that's if the person is social. Kenshin in this has never been overly social, so its gone unnoticed. Also the disorder is amplified by stress, so at the moment he has a full blown case, but normally the signs are more subtle. -Vesca- Glad you like it.
-Mirth- Yes I love Operation Mindcrime. And going to loosely follow the song sequence, though not right away, need to set up the MPD first. JML- I actually went back and fixed that. That's my editing for this story, so now you just get to deal w/my mistakes. ;P -Chiruken- Thank you, and yes I will be continuing "Fade". Have half of the next chapter typed up. Am currently working one fulltime job and one parttime, so my writing time is limited. Hope you like were this is going.
Sum Of Sin
~Chandra
Kaoru shifted uneasily at the nurses' station; there was something about hospitals that never seemed right. Something in the way they felt, smelled, and sounded. But mostly in the way they smelled. The heavy sterile medicine smell mixed with bittersweet undertones that disease and infection left in its wake, which stuck thickly in the back of your throat. Then there were the memories that florescent lighting and absently detached voices left in their wake. Her father had died in a hospital like this one, not that hospitals looked very different from each other, when she was five. An experience that left her with an astoundingly accurate memory of the smells and sounds of trauma care, and the knowledge of what death meant.
"Ms. Kamiya?" One of those absently detached voices, that surprisingly still held a few characteristics of true humanity and hinted at inexperience, broke into her thoughts.
"Oh...I'm sorry," She stumbled, eyes focusing on the man before her, "Doctor?" And she stopped, realizing she had missed his name.
"Jones." He said, smiling helpfully, adding to the obvious impression that he was fresh out of school.
"It is a pleasure to meet you, Doctor Jones." She smiled, extending her hand as some of the unease drained out of her. "I was sent here by the fifth district court to evaluate a Kenshin Himura's competency to stand trial."
"Yes, I am familiar with the case." A frown unbecomingly creased his face, "He's this way."
The walk was completed in silence, the sterile white hallways leading them through a maze of dehumanization. Finally after passing steel gates that offered to swallow them whole and keep them far from the light of day, they stood outside a plain white door. A small window allowed the only visual access to its confines, and through the metal grated porthole was the offer of insanity. Risking a glance, Kaoru stepped up to the small window. Inside a slender man leaned against the wall, his eyes hidden by unkept hair, its red color a shocking splash of color against artificial white.
"You're patient awaits, Ms. Kamiya." Then with a pause the doctor met her eyes nervously, "We see all sorts come through here, but...I'm not trying to tell you how to do you job." He paused, looking down, and when their eyes met again a pleading urgency accompanied his words. "Just don't let him get away with it." With that he opened the door, not waiting for he to answer, perhaps it was better for him if she didn't. Better for him to believe that some justice still existed, but justice wasn't her job.
"Thank you, Doctor." She said smiling at him, before stepping into the room. As always there was the sickening shock of nervousness that accompanied every evaluation, the instant of dread that sent a painful rush of adrenalin through her blood. Then the lock clicked behind her, leaving her staring at red hair and white walls.
"Good Afternoon, Kenshin." She spoke, hoping her voice was steadier that it sounded in her mind. ~Take a deep breath Kaoru~ her mind chided her ~Never give them control of the situation, as soon as they know they can use you you've lost.~ With a sigh she made a quick glance around the room. A bed, a table, two chairs, and a television mounted near the ceiling behind what looked like clear plastic were the room's simple decorations. Forcing her hands to remain still, she slid into one of chairs and looked up at him.
An almost childish giggle came from the figure as he answered, her. "Kenshin's asleep, Doctor-lady." The man raised his head, long strands of red hair framing a smiling face and playful amethyst eyes. "Can I go home now, Doctor-lady? I don't like this place, it smells funny, and I don't like the food."
She couldn't help it, the man's first words surprised her; leaving her wide- eyed and blinking as the childish banter continued.
"What's you're name?"
"K..Kaoru Kamiya." She stuttered out, opening her pad. She had been warned to expect the telltale signs of a Psychotic (Antisocial Personality Disorder); perhaps this was a game to him, the beginning of a battle of wills that he would use to test her.
"My name's Shinta." He walked towards her, his movements carefree with the sloppy grace of childhood. "Can't I go home now?"
"Not just jet, Shinta. I need to ask you some things, then we'll see." ~There was no mention of the name 'Shinta' in his file~ "Shinta, are you the only one that lives in Kenshin?" The question was an iffy one, on one hand suggesting that there should be other personalities and offered encouragement to some one seeking and insanity plea, but on the other hand it was something she had to know.
"No, there's me and Kenshin, and..." Violet eyes glanced around, widening slightly before he continued in a soft tone. "And there's Him. But he's bad, we don't wan to wake Him up." Then Shinta/Kenshin looked up at her, eyes tearfully wide. "I'm a good boy, aren't I Miss. Kaoru? They say I did bad things, but I'm a good boy! He did it, he makes us do it, we don't want to, I want to be a good by!" His words grew closer together, becoming more frantic with each new thought as they spilled out of him. Amethyst eyes stared pleadingly up at her, seeking reassurance as he hugged himself, rocking back and forth on the chair.
"Hush..." Kaoru stopped herself, realizing her hand was reaching out towards him. But the frightened worlds spoken so much like a child's had made her want to hold him and reassure his cries. "Yes, Shinta. You're a good boy." She knew it was a lie, even as the words came out of her mouth, but she couldn't stop them. "Why don't you take a rest, Shinta, I'm going to go for a little while. I'll be back soon. O.K.?" Despite herself she was responding to him as if he were a child, responding to the wide-eyed fear of rejection that that faced her.
"No, don't leave me. I don't want to be alone." The plea followed her like his eyes as she stood up.
"It's just for a few minutes, I'll be back soon." There was no answer, but instead the boy who called himself 'Shinta' crawled up onto the bed, which he could have easily sat down upon, and curled up into a ball. Three brisk knocks upon the door brought one of the orderlies, and offered her freedom into the seemingly freezing hallway. With a sigh she fell back against the near wall as the door clicked shut, the cool tile feeling frigid against her skin as she closed her eyes. This wasn't going to be easy.
Alone in the cafeteria Kaoru looked down at her notes, feeling ashamed at her loss of control over the situation. But then again, she hadn't been in control of the situation since she walked through the doorway. It had been merely one year since she had completed her degree in Psychology. From the beginning this was what she had wanted to do, to make people accountable for their actions. The insanity plea was nothing more than another excuse offered by a flawed legal system to allow the guilty their freedom. Out of the seven evaluations she had been assigned to, only one had gone free. But she had proven all seven of them capable to stand trial, and with out a law degree it was the best that she could do.
Sighing, Kaoru looked down at her pad, her pen moving over a set of letters as if driven by some need to break the code they held. "Shinta," the name glared back at her from the surface of the legal pad, it's letter bold from her pens constant attention. Her pen moved away from the letters, jotting quick questions below the name and leaving lines of space below the words. Stopping at a final question, it's one word allowing her mind to slide back to a day sixteen years ago.
*** She sat in a large room, the echoes of lamenting voices bouncing off wood paneled walls and a high white ceiling. Carefully she shifted, the wooden pews making her uncomfortable. The smell of flowers surrounded her, thick and heavy as she was lead from her seat, an old hand taking her where she didn't want to go. Silently her mind struggled against the childish innocence that kept her walking towards the coffin. ~No, don't look, you don't want to understand what's there.~ But it was too late and once again she watched to a child's eyes no longer innocent as the understanding of death hardened an accepting heart. Then the room blurred and she was sitting again, hating blue eyes looked out from the child's face focused on a single man. Watching as he was declared "Not Guilty for reasons of Insanity." Then they were leaving, filing out of the courtroom into a crowd. Still she watched his back, tears rolling silently down her cheeks. Then with audacity of some one who knows they just, quite literally, got away with murder, her turned to smile at her. That smile killed the last illusions of child hood just as quickly as his bullet had killed her father ***
"Ms. Kamiya?" A woman's voice started her from the memories, making her jump into sudden alertness. Underneath her skin her blood pumped fervently with the speed of a fresh dose of adrenaline.
"Are you alirght Ms. Kamiya?"
"Yes, thank you." Kaoru smiled, quickly noting the woman's appearance. She wore a typical nurse's uniform, and her features were just as usual as her clothing, just your typical nurse Betty, though Jean seamed to fit her features more.
"Doctor Jones asked me to check on you, you've been gone for nearly two hours." The nurse paused, the secretive smile that accompanies gossip spreading over her face. "I think he was worried that you had left."
"I see, thank you." Though Kaoru really didn't see, not that she cared to get close to the locals as she thought of them. This was work, not a social outlet. "Well I think I will be heading back to complete my evaluation." Kaoru finished, and gathered her things before another attempt at small talk could be made. She was never very good at small talk; perhaps it was because she never understood the use of tact.
This time Kaoru noticed the walls, two-toned with light green on the bottom and a darker puke-green on top. Institutional green, as charming as bruises, it was a wonder any one escaped its colors sane. Florescent lighting made the green claustrophobic, and at that moment Kaoru decided she hated green. White doors kept silent servitude to the halls ways like orderlies of steel and glass. Once more she stood in front of the door, a white 6 was painted to the left of the door handle. Finding strength in her disgust at the psyc. wards decoration she turned the doors knob.
"Kenshin..." Kaoru voice, slide through the white-lit gloom of the room. A gloom not borne from darkness, but more of a feeling that made the world seem an unsteady weight upon her small shoulders. At first glance the room was despairingly empty, lacking the unnatural brightness of the child's eyes, silent in sterile oppression that brought back the daily press of loneliness. A ragged sigh came in a grating rush of air and voice from beside the bed, a corner hidden perfectly from her eyes by the line of the mattress. The sound wrapped around her, echoing off the suddenly close white walls.
"Kenshin..?" She whispered, the air hissing involuntarily from between her teeth. The whisper sounds scared and insecure, and she hated it. She wouldn't be afraid, fear was useless; it didn't change anything, just made you helpless. With newfound resolve that fed of the anger twisting in her stomach, she walked briskly towards the bed, towards the hidden corner and any horror it could hold. In her mind, behind her blue eyes that glared fiercely at he destination, possibilities formed fleeting thoughts intent on frightening her. Steeling herself against the imagined boogieman she stepped clear of the bed, coming face to face with huddled limbs and tangled red hair.
Wide amethyst eyes, their irises flecked with the first amber hints of sorrow driven insanity, stared up at her. Red rimmed their blood shot surface, tangles of red hair falling in matted clumps against a swollen tear streaked face. For a moment it was hard to believe that this was the same person, the same child-like man that had greeted her earlier. In a slow movement his hand raised, knotted fingers unclenching as her push the tangled mass of red roughly away from his face. His slender hands were swollen; fingers caked with a red-brown substance that cracked and flaked off in thick sheets from ragged nails. Kaoru's eyes trailed from his fingers; the smell of drying blood heavy around her, making the cool room seem stifling as her eyes moved down his wrists and forearms.
The pale skin, which had seemed so perfect only hours before, was marred with long tares running in a chaotic pattern from knuckles to elbows. Blood seeped from the encrusted skin in fresh shining red rivers that ran down his elbows and dripped to the floor. So much blood, it filled her vision and suffocating her with its smell. Her mouth moved, but she couldn't find her voice, couldn't find the words that would bridge the gap between silent horror and rational thought. And through it all those red- rimmed eyes stared at her. The look was not a friendly one, but one of accusation screaming at her through the sterile white.
Once again the curled hand tried to push matted red hair away from his eyes, fingers tangling in the strands and leaving streaks of drying red/brown over sickly pale skin. Lips moved carefully, each word seeming to be a struggle before it came in ragged breathless half words. At first she couldn't hear him, couldn't hear anything and her mind filled in the silence with accusing tones. Then like a way crashing over the room sound returned, and his words reached her ears. "Where is she...Where is my wife." Wide-eyed blue stared, unable to give an answer. "Where's Tomoe...?" Questioningly hesitant in its tones, the answer already known, but wide eyes refused to remember. "Where is she?" More frantic now, the first whispers of a nameless fear filling his raspy tones.
Kaoru stepped back, the white wall a solid end to the surreal world. "I don't know, try and calm down Kenshin." Her voice was forced, words tight as she spoke the lie.
"Where's Tomoe?" This time it wasn't hesitant, the scream was as his movements violent. Fingers reached out for her shoulders as he thrust himself forwards his face a bloodied mask devoid of any semblance of humanity, as though there was nothing let than the animal the race evolved from.
Kaoru tried to move, but the lunge was too fast, too unexpected. Fingers curled around her shoulders with their tips digging buisingly into her flesh, His weight pushing her back against the wall, knocking the air from her lings at the impact. Black spots danced infront of her eyes, artificial light fading as darkness reached up to her. Then there was nothing, no impact of the waiting floor...no sound of the scream that should be burning from her throat. Nothing...
-----A/N----- -Chiruken- MPD is a very hard thing to diagnose. Most people who claim MPD in a situation such as Kenshin's are faking the disorder to achieve the insanity plea. There have been cases (that have been proved to be misdiagnosed) of people with over 1000 different 'personalities.' The other thing about MPD is that the core personality (in this case Kenshin) is not aware of the other personalities, and experiences missing time when a different personality is in control. As for Kaoru's nervousness I mentioned some background in the last chapter and will get into it in more detail in the next chapters. Am sorry that "Fade" is taking me so long to update, have half of the next chapter written but am having trouble getting around to finish it. Am having too much mental fun with this idea...I really need a tape recorder. -Val- MPD normally goes for at least six years with out being diagnosed, and that's if the person is social. Kenshin in this has never been overly social, so its gone unnoticed. Also the disorder is amplified by stress, so at the moment he has a full blown case, but normally the signs are more subtle. -Vesca- Glad you like it.
-Mirth- Yes I love Operation Mindcrime. And going to loosely follow the song sequence, though not right away, need to set up the MPD first. JML- I actually went back and fixed that. That's my editing for this story, so now you just get to deal w/my mistakes. ;P -Chiruken- Thank you, and yes I will be continuing "Fade". Have half of the next chapter typed up. Am currently working one fulltime job and one parttime, so my writing time is limited. Hope you like were this is going.