A/N: Tonight we're having Taco's for dinner! I like tacos! But I like
fanfiction more...Speaking of which, eye loave yew, Ari-chan!
Just so you know, I don't think I write Gir very well so I'd really
appreciate some advice.
I learned a new word on X-files last night. It's 'exsanguinated' it
means drained of blood, the sort of thing that vampires and cow
mutilators and the chupacabra do.
Why do I always get blamed when my brother does anything wrong? Just
because I'm older! I'm supposed to keep him out of trouble, but ya know
what? He is fourteen! He doesn't need me to baby-sit him while he plays
videogames all day! I don't CARE if he beats sephiroth or not! I have
things I want to do! Nobody understands that I have a LIFE I am NOT
my brother's keeper!
Sorry for the rant...
Disclaimer: Me Kiir, they copyright. Tarzan king of jungle.
Chapter 7...In which Kiir plays almost no part, Dib and Zim get some
odd readings from the grass and Dib gets progressively less well.
Kiir munched on cheeze doodlez while paying rapt attention to the
strange earth broadcast. Completely inane and yet somehow innately
appealing, it seemed that John, who was married to Lisa, was sleeping
with Tina, and someone had killed Lisa, but John didn't know it and it
was most likely either Tina or the mysterious figure. Kiir was betting
on the mysterious figure, since he was obviously John's long lost twin
brother. He was in love with Tina too, but what neither of them knew
was that Tina was not only just sleeping with John for his money but was
also a lesbian and had been sending anonymous love letters to John's
secretary Sarah. Which was sad since John apparently really did love
her.
Kiir sniffed.
"WHATCHA WHATCHIN'?!" somebody shrieked.
The cheeze doodlez ended up all over the couch and in the rebel's
hair. She turned and glared at the little robot.
"You look saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Wannaplaywitmahpiggy?!" He
proffered the pink thing to her with a cheerful 'squeak-ky'.
Kiir, busy brushing the orangey yellow chrunchies from her hair,
raised an eyebrow. "Um, no...thanks." This 'piggy' was a bit
disturbing, so, she decided, was the robot. Was it supposed to be Zim's
SIR unit? She'd heard that the Tallest had given him some sort of
defective piece of junk.
The robot had sat himself on the floor next to the couch and was
staring at the television. It looked up at her. "This is my faaavorite
commercial." It giggled.
She leaned back on the couch. "What are you?" she muttered.
"I'm Gir!" it chirped.
"Ah-huh." She picked up the remote and changed the channel.
***
Dib looked up at the screen as the status of the grass was displayed.
The output of which was mostly in Irken characters only three quarters
or so he could actually read. That didn't matter though, because the
computer read the results for them.
"Subject, grass, common flora covering much planet Earth's landmasses.
Specimen has been subject to a massive bio-energy drain. Traces of
unknown organic material on the outer layer of the plant suggest the
siphon was a living being."
Well, that proved it was the oranges that had done it, but they'd
pretty much knew that already. He gave Zim a quizzical look.
"Computer, what are the properties of the organic material?" the
Irken demanded.
"Substance is semi-solid but mutable."
"What type of bio-energy does it display?"
"Energy signature matches that of Earth's biofield," the computer
answered.
He watched Zim's expression become understandably confused.
"That would mean they're from Earth," the Irken muttered. "But that's
impossible."
Dib grinned and shook his head, he understood this. "No, they aren't
from earth, they absorbed the energy from the grass, remember? I bet
they don't even HAVE any energy of their own."
Zim looked impressed. "I knew that," he said.
Dib smirked, and felt rather flattered.
"Are there any lasting ill effects from the drain?"
"Besides the fact that the sample is dead, you mean?" the computer
retorted sarcastically.
Zim frowned. "Yes, that is exactly what I mean. Extrapolate from
known data, would there have been any complications in a non-fatal
drain?" He sounded concerned and Dib thought he saw the ex-invader
glance at him out of the corner of his eye.
Was Zim worried about him? It certainly sounded that way. Why else
would he be asking that? Dib pushed his glasses up nervously.
The computer paused. "...Unknown. Data insufficient to make an accurate
extrapolatation." It didn't sound as sure of itself as usual.
Zim's frown deepened. "Stupid useless piece of junk," he muttered,
crossing his arms.
"Hey!" it sounded insulted.
Dib meanwhile had fallen into thought. Zim had said he had no idea
where the Oranges came from and the computer didn't even know what they
were made of. That surely meant they were from pretty far away, didn't
it? "Computer," he asked curiously, "Is the unknown compound similar
to anything in your database, even if it doesn't quite match it?" He saw
Zim look at him, and then at the computer monitor. Dib shrugged. "Just a
thought."
"Running analysis...Confirmed, compound is similar to particles found
clinging to people sent through Instant Transportation machines and
also to samples found on Earth's moon."
Both human and Irken gazes snapped up.
"Instant Transport?" asked Dib.
At the same time Zim demanded, "The moon?"
"Confirmed."
"Zim, what's an Instant Transport machine?"
"It's mode of travel that never really caught on. Partly because it's
so expensive, but mostly because space ships are just a lot cooler," Zim
explained. "Anyway it's this machine that zaps you through non-space
to any point you want without any time passing in between."
"...like that transportery thing you had everybody build when you had
that crazy Santa suit?"
The alien paused. "...yes, like that."
Zim seemed vaguely uncomfortable at the mentioning of his previous
world conquering exploits. Dib supposed it was because he WAS
uncomfortable with it, having discovered that the whole thing was a big
joke.
Or, cynical Dib said, daring to make himself heard for the first time
since entering the house, maybe he's afraid you'll suddenly remember
that he's the BAD GUY?
Dib rolled his eyes and ignored the suspicions in the back of his mind.
he had a more immediate paranormal problem to investigate at the moment.
"Okay so wouldn't that make sense, because they keep appearing and
disappearing," he mused.
"Indeed," Zim nodded. "It would follow that they must have some sort
of Instant transportation technology similar to that of the Irken
Empire. But that does not explain why the same particles are on your
moon."
"Maybe that's where they come from?"
"Doubtful," Zim answered, "My scans show that there has not been life
on your moon for at least a thousand years."
"Oh. Oh well." Then Dib did a double take, his yellow eyes getting
wide as he became exited. "Wait a minute, you mean there WAS life on the
moon?"
Zim shrugged. "It's probable. I didn't do any more than preliminary
tests, it didn't seem very useful at the time."
"I KNEW it," he grinned, "I knew there was life on the moon."
***
Zim smirked at the exuberant UFO buff. So enthusiastic. "Calm down
human, what ever was there is long dead."
Dib grinned at him, rather manically. "Not necessarily. I mean, they
could have migrated off planet, er, satellite. They could even have
integrated with the human population long ago. Or, even if they didn't,
I wonder what killed them off?"
The Irken sighed, resting his chin on his hand, watching the boy
obsess. It was cute, in a frantic, potentially self-destructive sort of
way. Of course, Zim himself was living proof that just because the
human seemed crazy at times didn't mean he was wrong. He chuckled to
himself.
"Hey, maybe they're the Oranges! Maybe they're searching the galaxy
for the right type of energy to restore their decimated home world." He
got a dreamy, star-gazy look in his eyes.
Zim snorted. "I wouldn't hold them in very high esteem if I were you,
Dib-human. Even IF, as incredibly improbable as it is, that were what
they were trying to do, they obviously are going to kill you, your race
and a good amount of the other life on your little planet to do it."
"Oh, yeah. Huh. Well, it's still possible though," his eyes became
more focused again, and he pushed up his glasses.
He rolled his eyes, glad to have brought Dib back to reality for the
moment. "If you like I will send a probe to do more tests on your moon,
I should probably get more samples of that compound to test anyway."
He wanted to know as much as possible about these 'Oranges'. He didn't
like unknowns, they made him uneasy. Especially not knowing whether or
not there had been any permanent damage done to Dib. He was certainly
acting normal enough, normal for Dib anyway. But he was still worried,
humans were such a frail race. Even the healthiest ones could die
suddenly, seemingly without reason, and none of them had even ever made it
to a hundred and fifty of their short earth years.
Zim shook his head slightly to get rid of the melancholy thought.
"I'll send the probe off right now." He looked up, "Computer, launch
moon probe from orbital base."
"Activating..."
Zim glanced over at Dib, who was looking a little paler than usual and
more tired than he had moments before. His excitement had probably
accentuated his lack of energy. He should have realized mentioning life
on the moon would illicit such a reaction. And he seemed restless, a bit
bored even. Zim wondered if there was anything he could do to perk him
up. Hmmmmmm. "Computer, display probe launch on screen."
He saw Dib's expression brighten instantly as the monitor snapped on
to show an orbital view of Earth, Zim's crescent-shaped base, and the
Earth's natural satellite, the grey-brown pockmarked rock, Luna.
***
Dib watched the screen with barely disguised longing. A hatch in the
orbital base, which he had been in once but really hadn't gotten a
chance to look around, and a probe, small, sleek and bearing the
standard Irken insignia shot from it. He watched it rocket to the moon
across a field of stars, all in much sharper focus than Earth
instruments could manage. It almost looked like he was out there in
space. If only...He sighed.
He slumped back in the chair, feeling distinctly weary, his eyes still
fixed on the monitor. He didn't feel so well, a little nauseous, a bit
dizzy too. Was he going to die like that grass? He hoped not. Here, in
the chair, with Zim beside him without, for once, a weapon of mass
destruction or even small scale terror, he felt...content. Like things
were finally looking up. Such a contrast to last night, when he lay in
bed with out any hope for the future, wondering if Zim would shoot him
as a favor. Now the only thing that he might have asked the Irken was
to hold him, tell him he wasn't alone. That was what the dark haired
bespectacled human feared most in the world, being alone.
***
Zim saw Dib's eyes as he stared both literally and figuratively, off
into space. He still didn't look well, in fact he looked even worse
than before. His eyes were glassy and his face was flushed. Zim thought
the human might have a 'fever', a symptom, he knew, of illness.
"Dib," he said, trying to rouse him from his waking slumber, "Dib
are you in satisfactory condition?"
"Hmmm?" the slouched, black clad form looked up.
"Are you feeling okay?"
Dib blinked blearily and Zim was becoming more concerned by the
moment.
"Nn, not... really," he admitted, "I feel kind of dizzy and nauseous
and just, not good."
Zim frowned. "I think you have a fever, Dib-human."
"Maybe," he said sleepily. "I don't know, can you check?"
Zim blinked. Wasn't lack of alertness a sign of fever? "You want
me to?"
Dib nodded vaguely.
Zim, unsure of himself for once pulled off one glove and reached
over to Dib, his three fingered hand hovering just above the human's
forehead. Should he really touch him? He looked at the boy's large
glazed ryes, and laid the back of his hand on Dib's face.
"Dear Tallest, you're burning up!" he exclaimed.
"I am?" he asked groggily. "That's not good." The boy nuzzled Zim's
hand with his cheek. "Your hand's nice and cool."
Zim felt himself blush, but couldn't bring himself to snatch his
hand away. No, Dib definitely wasn't thinking straight.
The human looked up with large, worried, golden eyes. "Mmmmm, Zim,
what time is it?"
Zim glanced at the clock, he answered tentatively, wondering why Dib
wanted to know. "Seven-thirty."
"Oh no, I've got to...to get home," the boy immediately, shakily
tried to stand.
Zim put his hands on Dib's shoulders and tried both to steady him and
to gently force him back down into the chair. "No, Dib, you've got to-"
The human wobbled and fainted into Zim's arms.
To Be Continued...
Dun dun dun. Heheh. CLIFHANGER OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. Okay,
one hint, the title of the next chapter is 'Fever Dreams'.
Read it? Review it!
fanfiction more...Speaking of which, eye loave yew, Ari-chan!
Just so you know, I don't think I write Gir very well so I'd really
appreciate some advice.
I learned a new word on X-files last night. It's 'exsanguinated' it
means drained of blood, the sort of thing that vampires and cow
mutilators and the chupacabra do.
Why do I always get blamed when my brother does anything wrong? Just
because I'm older! I'm supposed to keep him out of trouble, but ya know
what? He is fourteen! He doesn't need me to baby-sit him while he plays
videogames all day! I don't CARE if he beats sephiroth or not! I have
things I want to do! Nobody understands that I have a LIFE I am NOT
my brother's keeper!
Sorry for the rant...
Disclaimer: Me Kiir, they copyright. Tarzan king of jungle.
Chapter 7...In which Kiir plays almost no part, Dib and Zim get some
odd readings from the grass and Dib gets progressively less well.
Kiir munched on cheeze doodlez while paying rapt attention to the
strange earth broadcast. Completely inane and yet somehow innately
appealing, it seemed that John, who was married to Lisa, was sleeping
with Tina, and someone had killed Lisa, but John didn't know it and it
was most likely either Tina or the mysterious figure. Kiir was betting
on the mysterious figure, since he was obviously John's long lost twin
brother. He was in love with Tina too, but what neither of them knew
was that Tina was not only just sleeping with John for his money but was
also a lesbian and had been sending anonymous love letters to John's
secretary Sarah. Which was sad since John apparently really did love
her.
Kiir sniffed.
"WHATCHA WHATCHIN'?!" somebody shrieked.
The cheeze doodlez ended up all over the couch and in the rebel's
hair. She turned and glared at the little robot.
"You look saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Wannaplaywitmahpiggy?!" He
proffered the pink thing to her with a cheerful 'squeak-ky'.
Kiir, busy brushing the orangey yellow chrunchies from her hair,
raised an eyebrow. "Um, no...thanks." This 'piggy' was a bit
disturbing, so, she decided, was the robot. Was it supposed to be Zim's
SIR unit? She'd heard that the Tallest had given him some sort of
defective piece of junk.
The robot had sat himself on the floor next to the couch and was
staring at the television. It looked up at her. "This is my faaavorite
commercial." It giggled.
She leaned back on the couch. "What are you?" she muttered.
"I'm Gir!" it chirped.
"Ah-huh." She picked up the remote and changed the channel.
***
Dib looked up at the screen as the status of the grass was displayed.
The output of which was mostly in Irken characters only three quarters
or so he could actually read. That didn't matter though, because the
computer read the results for them.
"Subject, grass, common flora covering much planet Earth's landmasses.
Specimen has been subject to a massive bio-energy drain. Traces of
unknown organic material on the outer layer of the plant suggest the
siphon was a living being."
Well, that proved it was the oranges that had done it, but they'd
pretty much knew that already. He gave Zim a quizzical look.
"Computer, what are the properties of the organic material?" the
Irken demanded.
"Substance is semi-solid but mutable."
"What type of bio-energy does it display?"
"Energy signature matches that of Earth's biofield," the computer
answered.
He watched Zim's expression become understandably confused.
"That would mean they're from Earth," the Irken muttered. "But that's
impossible."
Dib grinned and shook his head, he understood this. "No, they aren't
from earth, they absorbed the energy from the grass, remember? I bet
they don't even HAVE any energy of their own."
Zim looked impressed. "I knew that," he said.
Dib smirked, and felt rather flattered.
"Are there any lasting ill effects from the drain?"
"Besides the fact that the sample is dead, you mean?" the computer
retorted sarcastically.
Zim frowned. "Yes, that is exactly what I mean. Extrapolate from
known data, would there have been any complications in a non-fatal
drain?" He sounded concerned and Dib thought he saw the ex-invader
glance at him out of the corner of his eye.
Was Zim worried about him? It certainly sounded that way. Why else
would he be asking that? Dib pushed his glasses up nervously.
The computer paused. "...Unknown. Data insufficient to make an accurate
extrapolatation." It didn't sound as sure of itself as usual.
Zim's frown deepened. "Stupid useless piece of junk," he muttered,
crossing his arms.
"Hey!" it sounded insulted.
Dib meanwhile had fallen into thought. Zim had said he had no idea
where the Oranges came from and the computer didn't even know what they
were made of. That surely meant they were from pretty far away, didn't
it? "Computer," he asked curiously, "Is the unknown compound similar
to anything in your database, even if it doesn't quite match it?" He saw
Zim look at him, and then at the computer monitor. Dib shrugged. "Just a
thought."
"Running analysis...Confirmed, compound is similar to particles found
clinging to people sent through Instant Transportation machines and
also to samples found on Earth's moon."
Both human and Irken gazes snapped up.
"Instant Transport?" asked Dib.
At the same time Zim demanded, "The moon?"
"Confirmed."
"Zim, what's an Instant Transport machine?"
"It's mode of travel that never really caught on. Partly because it's
so expensive, but mostly because space ships are just a lot cooler," Zim
explained. "Anyway it's this machine that zaps you through non-space
to any point you want without any time passing in between."
"...like that transportery thing you had everybody build when you had
that crazy Santa suit?"
The alien paused. "...yes, like that."
Zim seemed vaguely uncomfortable at the mentioning of his previous
world conquering exploits. Dib supposed it was because he WAS
uncomfortable with it, having discovered that the whole thing was a big
joke.
Or, cynical Dib said, daring to make himself heard for the first time
since entering the house, maybe he's afraid you'll suddenly remember
that he's the BAD GUY?
Dib rolled his eyes and ignored the suspicions in the back of his mind.
he had a more immediate paranormal problem to investigate at the moment.
"Okay so wouldn't that make sense, because they keep appearing and
disappearing," he mused.
"Indeed," Zim nodded. "It would follow that they must have some sort
of Instant transportation technology similar to that of the Irken
Empire. But that does not explain why the same particles are on your
moon."
"Maybe that's where they come from?"
"Doubtful," Zim answered, "My scans show that there has not been life
on your moon for at least a thousand years."
"Oh. Oh well." Then Dib did a double take, his yellow eyes getting
wide as he became exited. "Wait a minute, you mean there WAS life on the
moon?"
Zim shrugged. "It's probable. I didn't do any more than preliminary
tests, it didn't seem very useful at the time."
"I KNEW it," he grinned, "I knew there was life on the moon."
***
Zim smirked at the exuberant UFO buff. So enthusiastic. "Calm down
human, what ever was there is long dead."
Dib grinned at him, rather manically. "Not necessarily. I mean, they
could have migrated off planet, er, satellite. They could even have
integrated with the human population long ago. Or, even if they didn't,
I wonder what killed them off?"
The Irken sighed, resting his chin on his hand, watching the boy
obsess. It was cute, in a frantic, potentially self-destructive sort of
way. Of course, Zim himself was living proof that just because the
human seemed crazy at times didn't mean he was wrong. He chuckled to
himself.
"Hey, maybe they're the Oranges! Maybe they're searching the galaxy
for the right type of energy to restore their decimated home world." He
got a dreamy, star-gazy look in his eyes.
Zim snorted. "I wouldn't hold them in very high esteem if I were you,
Dib-human. Even IF, as incredibly improbable as it is, that were what
they were trying to do, they obviously are going to kill you, your race
and a good amount of the other life on your little planet to do it."
"Oh, yeah. Huh. Well, it's still possible though," his eyes became
more focused again, and he pushed up his glasses.
He rolled his eyes, glad to have brought Dib back to reality for the
moment. "If you like I will send a probe to do more tests on your moon,
I should probably get more samples of that compound to test anyway."
He wanted to know as much as possible about these 'Oranges'. He didn't
like unknowns, they made him uneasy. Especially not knowing whether or
not there had been any permanent damage done to Dib. He was certainly
acting normal enough, normal for Dib anyway. But he was still worried,
humans were such a frail race. Even the healthiest ones could die
suddenly, seemingly without reason, and none of them had even ever made it
to a hundred and fifty of their short earth years.
Zim shook his head slightly to get rid of the melancholy thought.
"I'll send the probe off right now." He looked up, "Computer, launch
moon probe from orbital base."
"Activating..."
Zim glanced over at Dib, who was looking a little paler than usual and
more tired than he had moments before. His excitement had probably
accentuated his lack of energy. He should have realized mentioning life
on the moon would illicit such a reaction. And he seemed restless, a bit
bored even. Zim wondered if there was anything he could do to perk him
up. Hmmmmmm. "Computer, display probe launch on screen."
He saw Dib's expression brighten instantly as the monitor snapped on
to show an orbital view of Earth, Zim's crescent-shaped base, and the
Earth's natural satellite, the grey-brown pockmarked rock, Luna.
***
Dib watched the screen with barely disguised longing. A hatch in the
orbital base, which he had been in once but really hadn't gotten a
chance to look around, and a probe, small, sleek and bearing the
standard Irken insignia shot from it. He watched it rocket to the moon
across a field of stars, all in much sharper focus than Earth
instruments could manage. It almost looked like he was out there in
space. If only...He sighed.
He slumped back in the chair, feeling distinctly weary, his eyes still
fixed on the monitor. He didn't feel so well, a little nauseous, a bit
dizzy too. Was he going to die like that grass? He hoped not. Here, in
the chair, with Zim beside him without, for once, a weapon of mass
destruction or even small scale terror, he felt...content. Like things
were finally looking up. Such a contrast to last night, when he lay in
bed with out any hope for the future, wondering if Zim would shoot him
as a favor. Now the only thing that he might have asked the Irken was
to hold him, tell him he wasn't alone. That was what the dark haired
bespectacled human feared most in the world, being alone.
***
Zim saw Dib's eyes as he stared both literally and figuratively, off
into space. He still didn't look well, in fact he looked even worse
than before. His eyes were glassy and his face was flushed. Zim thought
the human might have a 'fever', a symptom, he knew, of illness.
"Dib," he said, trying to rouse him from his waking slumber, "Dib
are you in satisfactory condition?"
"Hmmm?" the slouched, black clad form looked up.
"Are you feeling okay?"
Dib blinked blearily and Zim was becoming more concerned by the
moment.
"Nn, not... really," he admitted, "I feel kind of dizzy and nauseous
and just, not good."
Zim frowned. "I think you have a fever, Dib-human."
"Maybe," he said sleepily. "I don't know, can you check?"
Zim blinked. Wasn't lack of alertness a sign of fever? "You want
me to?"
Dib nodded vaguely.
Zim, unsure of himself for once pulled off one glove and reached
over to Dib, his three fingered hand hovering just above the human's
forehead. Should he really touch him? He looked at the boy's large
glazed ryes, and laid the back of his hand on Dib's face.
"Dear Tallest, you're burning up!" he exclaimed.
"I am?" he asked groggily. "That's not good." The boy nuzzled Zim's
hand with his cheek. "Your hand's nice and cool."
Zim felt himself blush, but couldn't bring himself to snatch his
hand away. No, Dib definitely wasn't thinking straight.
The human looked up with large, worried, golden eyes. "Mmmmm, Zim,
what time is it?"
Zim glanced at the clock, he answered tentatively, wondering why Dib
wanted to know. "Seven-thirty."
"Oh no, I've got to...to get home," the boy immediately, shakily
tried to stand.
Zim put his hands on Dib's shoulders and tried both to steady him and
to gently force him back down into the chair. "No, Dib, you've got to-"
The human wobbled and fainted into Zim's arms.
To Be Continued...
Dun dun dun. Heheh. CLIFHANGER OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. Okay,
one hint, the title of the next chapter is 'Fever Dreams'.
Read it? Review it!