Non Mary Sueish Mary Sues
Chapter 3
DISCLAIMER:
DT: Yadda yadda yadda, me no own LOTR. Take your lawyer and shove it up your-
Dark Omen: You shouldn't swear.
DT: I never swear. *eye twitch*
Dark Omen: Suure.
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"So, where're we goin'?" GT asked, riding after Aragorn.
"To. The Uruk. Hai. Camp." Aragorn told her for the last time.
"Okay. Hey Kels, wanna race?"
"Okay." Kels agreed. "Go!" She yelled, taking off in the exact opposite direction that they were going, followed by GT.
Aragorn rolled his eyes and went to follow them, motioning for Legolas to follow him.
"No!" Gimli yelled. "I will not go any closer to the demonic pikas!"
Legolas tried not to laugh, while Aragorn sighed in frustration.
"Gimli, there is no such thing as a demonic pika." Aragorn told the dwaf patiently.
"Oh yes there is!"
MEANWHILE...
"Kels, I thought you knew where you were going!" GT yelled.
"I do know where I'm going!" Kelsey protested. "My incredible sense of direction told me to go this way."
"Kels, would this be the same incredible sense of direction that helped you be half an hour late to come over to my house?" GT asked.
"No, that would be your directions." Kelsey argued.
"I gave good directions!" GT protested.
"No, you just said, 'turn left a bunch of times'!" Kelsey argued.
"So? Those directions were easy enough to follow!" GT yelled. "Plus you were the one who walked around the whole West Edmonton Mall before finding a Booster Juice!"
"So?" Kelsey asked. "At least I don't...uh...do something!" Kelsey resorted to immaturely sticking out her tongue.
"Reeeal mature Kels." GT said, rolling her eyes.
"Oh shaddup!" Kelsey yelled, crossing her arms.
"No!!!"
"YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Kelsey yelled at the top of her lungs. Which attracted a random group of Orcs who happened to be passing by.
"NICE ONE DUMBASS!!!!!!!!!!!" GT yelled.
"Hey, we can take 'em." Kelsey argued. "Oh SHIT!!!!!!! We don't have any weapons!!!!"
"Ya!!!! SHERLOCK!!!!!!!!!" GT screamed back.
"Okay...Umm...This isn't too good is it?" Kelsey asked.
"No. No it's not." GT replied.
"Umm...Got a plan?" Kelsey asked.
"Why the hell would I have a plan? You're the genius who made them come over here?" GT asked.
"Umm...okay. Lemme think." Kelsey said, ignoring the orcs that were closing in on her and her friend.
"HURRY UP ASSCLOWN!!!!!!!!!" GT yelled.
The orcs kept closing in on the friends.
"KELS!!!! HURRY YOUR ASS UP!!!!!!!!" GT yelled.
"WELL IF YOU WOULD SHUT UP I WOULD THINK FASTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Kelsey yelled.
"WELL YOU BETTER THINK AWFULLY DAMN FAST, BECAUSE THERE'S AN ANGRY HORDE OF ORCS CLOSING IN ON US FAST!!!!!!!" GT yelled back.
"SHUT UP BITCH!!!!!!" Kelsey yelled back.
"LIKE HELL!!!!!" GT yelled.
The orcs encircled them as the two friends kept arguing, paying no attention to the orcs.
GT turned her back on her friend, and was hit in the back of the head with something.
"DAMN IT KELS!!!!! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT?!!!" GT yelled, before noticing the scene before her.
Several people on horses were now killing all the orcs. By the looks of it, Kels was just as suprised and confused as she was.
The leader of the horsemen rode up to the girls, dismounted and removed his helmet. The girls were suprised to see that he was their age.
"What are two unarmed maidens doing travelling by themselves?" He asked.
"We were travelling with three others, but-" GT began but she was cut off by Kelsey.
"Hi. You see, we lost our companions we were travelling with." Kelsey began, batting her eyelashes.
"More like your incredible-" GT interrupted, but Kelsey cut her off with a sharp elbow to the ribs.
"What are your names?" The leader asked.
"I'm GT, and the one flirting with you is Kelsey." GT explained.
"Hey! I am not flirting!" Kelsey lied, fluttering her eyelashes again.
"Oh puh-leeze!" GT said, rolling her eyes.
"You aren't flirting? Because it's working." The leader said to Kelsey, who giggled.
"If you excuse me, I think I'll go over there and PUKE MY GUTS OUT!!!!" GT yelled, rolling her eyes.
"Why?" Kelsey asked, looking away from the eyes of the leader.
"You don't even know the guy's name and you're flirting with him?" GT asked.
"My name is Talath." The leader told her.
"There! Now I know his name. I can flirt now." Kels said, smiling and turning back to Talath.
GT hit herself in the forehead with the heel of her hand. Then she had a brilliant idea. "You guys wanna learn a new, fun way of dancing?"
"Suuure." The group answered, except for Talath, who was still making out with Kelsey.
"WILL YOU STOP EATING EACH OTHER'S FACES OFF?!!!!!!!!!!!!" GT yelled.
Kelsey blushed and straightened her shirt.
"Okay, let's dance." GT said, pulling a cd player and cd's out of her backpack.
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