Part Seven: The Slayer Princess Misses The Boat
Buffy has to get her life into perspective. She is still very much in love with Angel. Angel is her soul mate, her honey. She has not given up all hope for his return. Their love is the one certainty in her life.
Buffy looks at herself in the mirror. Her thoughts drift to Xander
"This thing with Xander has got to stop, whatever it is. It is out of control. Xander is out of control. What is he now?
She gets a chill thinking about those kisses.
"I definitely have to talk to him. We have to stop."
Xander pulls himself from his bed. He inspects his wounds. All are healing. More importantly, there was very little remaining pain.
He, of course, begins to think of Buffy. All the intensity of last night comes back.
"I know exactly what she is thinking now. She is thinking how she still loves dead boy. Next time I see her she will be all business. She will calmly tell me that last night was a fluke.
He shakes his head to clear those thoughts from his mind.
Angelus is beside himself. Spike and Drusilla are trying to enjoy a peaceful morning. With the slayer so busy at the cemetery last night, the pickings were easy elsewhere in Sunnydale. They are both in a very cheery mood.
"Angelus, I thought you didn't have the bloody hots for her when you were your evil-loving self?"
Dru ads, "Come on, daddy. Wasn't it fun enough to watch her get all bloody in the knee?"
She leaves Spike to go over to her dolls. She begins to fondle Miss Edith.
"Her blood smelled so sweet, Angelus. Can you please kill her for me? Then the little boy will be nothing."
Getting very nervous, "Miss Edith doesn't like him, daddy. She feels pain. He is bad.
Spike goes to his mate. He looks back to Angelus.
"Now you've gotten Dru all upset, again"
"Why don't you just kill the bitch? All this bloody playing around isn't like you, bloke!"
Angelus goes over to Spike. He condescendingly puts his arm around him.
"Spike, my good man, the reason that you are a good vampire while, I am a great vampire, is because you lack vision. You have to be creative with the humans."
"I was taught never to play with my food."
Continuing in his condescending manner. "Spike, you are so damn..Ordinary."
"Dru knows the sweet, sweet rewards of terror and mental torture."
Angelus goes to her. "The absolute pleasure of watching one of them crumble right before your eyes. It does something to their blood, actually. Gives it a certain kick."
"Yea, in the mean time the slayer and her boy toy kill half the damn daemon population of Sunnydale. Tell me Angelus, does your big plan include killing them at some point?"
Spike leaves, disgusted.
Angelus, more to himself than to Dru, "So, the pathetic little boy thinks he can stand up to the terror. He hasn't even begun to see what is coming his way!"
Dru approaches Angelus. "Share it with me, daddy."
Looking at her approvingly, "Dru, I knew you would understand. The slayer is weakening. She still has her pathetic love for her "Angel" but the boy wonder is getting to her. He has to suffer for that. We can drive them both crazy before we feast on their boiling blood."
"Like you did with me, daddy! Just like you did with me! You know how to make Miss Edith so happy."
Angelus puts his hands, seductively, on Dru's back, bringing her closer to him. He kisses her roughly. The Daemon then takes her by the hand, leading her in the opposite direction Spike took when he left.
Willow meets Buffy for school. They walk in silence for a block or so. Willow can tell that Buffy has some more stuff for the vault.
"Okay, Buffy, are you going to give it up freely or do I have to use my magic on you?"
After a few silent seconds, "He kissed me this time, I think."
Willow is confused. "You don't know?"
Realizing this sounds a little funny. "Well, he was doing his crazy thing, again. He
backed me into a tree. Everything got sort of fuzzy after that."
"Buffy, what are you and Xander doing?"
"I have to talk to him tonight after the meeting."
"Do you still love Angel, Buffy?"
"Yes I do, Willow. With all my heart and soul! I have to stop this with Xander. It's him. He's this…I don't know what he is. I still love Angel. I can't patrol with Xander anymore."
Rachel sits alone in her motel room. It's always tough to find one which stays dark enough during the day. She is quite lonely. She fell in love with Angel a long time ago. He was the only one of their kind she could find who didn't stalk and feed on humans. He needed her, too. Her kindness and gentle nature were not lost on him.
She didn't have to pay dues with him.
He left her, though. His guilt and self-pity drove him away from her.
She had no idea where he went, until recently. She went to him once when she first found out he was here. He told her of his love for the slayer. She left in anger and sorrow. But, soon found she had nowhere else to go.
But, now he was Angelus.
Rachel still loves him but it is killing her to see him terrorize the slayer and her friends. When she learned of his campaign against Xander she was determined to help the boy as much as she could.
A curious thing happened. She finds herself attracted to him. She can't help it even though she knows it will cause trouble for everyone involved. Their two encounters thus far have proven to be very comforting and loving.
But, now she is in danger, herself. If Angelus ever finds out she is helping Xander he will have no mercy on her.
There are very stiff penalties for vampires that dare to help humans. Especially, one of Xander's status. Treason is not tolerated in vampiric circles.
Hell, even if they don't find out she is helping Xander, she will be expected to join the "Nest" of the super vampires.
To the humans she is a beast of the night. To her own kind she is a joke. Who ever heard of a non-violent vampire?
Her only hope is that Angelus will become Angel, again. But then, as Angel, he and the slayer are soul mates.
Rachel has very little to keep her going. More and more she has been thinking of a certain Xander Harris.
Xander joins the gang for the meeting. When he looks at Buffy he can tell his earlier observation was going to prove correct. She has a very serious and, business like look on her face.
This gets him angry. He sits across from her. He leans his arms on the center of the table, bringing his face close to hers.
"Hello, Buffy."
She looks at him but doesn't say anything. He is not surprised.
"How did I know you weren't going to answer me?"
"Xander, we have to talk after this."
"My God, I must be psychic."
"You're in a great mood!"
Xander doesn't answer. He is determined not to allow Buffy to take over this meeting with her slayer bratiness which, he knows is coming.
Giles comes in. He begins the meeting.
"I understand last night was very eventful?"
Xander begins to answer. "Giles, there were more vampires after us last night than I have ever seen before."
"Is this true, Buffy?"
Xander speaks before Buffy can reply.
"I resent that, Giles. You never think anything is official unless she says it. What makes you think she is so reliable?"
I'll tell you her secret. You know she drinks, Giles?"
Everyone except Buffy and Giles are laughing. The slayer just shakes her head.
Xander continues. "See, she doesn't deny it. Even her mother doesn't know. She hides it in her mouthwash bottle.
So, there! How can you believe anything she says?
Buffy speaks up. "Giles, could you tell him to shut up? This is a serious meeting."
"Yes, Xander, can we get back to last night?"
Buffy speaks up. "Giles, last night was very dangerous. We almost lost Xander. I can't afford to have anybody with me on patrol, anymore."
Xander is incredulous. "What did you say?"
"It's not just you, Xander. I'm the slayer. From now on I work alone. It's too hard to try and protect everyone. Civilians will do research, only."
Xander is still seething. In a sarcastic tone, "You have to understand, Giles, The slayer princess doesn't want to share. She…"
Buffy's eyes bulge. She gets up, approaching Xander menacingly. "What did you call me?"
Xander, not backing down. "You know, when you use to get like this before I thought it was because you had such a hard life. Now I think it's a more basic problem. You're a brat!"
Buffy gets so mad she reaches out, grabbing him by his shirt.
"How about if this brat kicks your ass!"
"Well, at least you admit it. You know they say that's half the battle."
Buffy is beside her self. This boy in front of her has her half crazy. She has to retaliate, somehow.
"Well, Lavelle, at least I know what I am."
Now it is Xanders turn to be upset. He loathes his middle name.
"Who told you my middle name?" He looks menacingly at Willow.
He goes toe to toe with Buffy, The name is Xander, say it!"
Buffy, knowing she has the advantage back.
"Poor Lavelle, can't even stand his own name."
Turning his attention back to Willow. "It had to be you who told her. Nobody else knows."
Willow and everyone else in the room are now in stitches, even Giles. He has to agree with Rebecca. They certainly put on a good show.
After a few minutes Giles gets everyone back to business. For the moment Buffy has relaxed her demand that no one else be involved with the actual slaying.
She finds herself much more relaxed then she was earlier. She can't help but look at Xander. He gets her madder than anyone has ever gotten her. But, he also seems to know what she needs. And, he always seems to give it to her.
But, he is still Xander. Xander and Willow are her friends. Angel is her heartthrob.
When the meeting is over Buffy goes to Xander.
"Xander, we need to talk."
"Boy, do I ever understand that tone of voice!"
"What does that mean, Xander?"
"Nothing, lets go into Giles office. They do. Buffy speaks first
"Xander, last night..We have to stop."
"Yea I know, Buffy."
"You do?"
"I know the drill. You still love Angel. He's the man (sic) in your dreams. He's the cream in your coffee. He's the gravy on your mash potatoes."
"Xander, I'm serious."
"You're not serious, you're pathetic but, I guess that's a different discussion."
"Xander, don't be like this."
He doesn't answer.
As he looks into the face of this woman beside him a quiet recognition settles in.
She is dumping me for dead boy all over, again. We aren't even together but she's still dumping me.
Dead boy isn't even around, anymore but she's still dumping me for him.
Buffy Anne Summers.
The girl with whom he fell in love. The girl who starts his heart beating in the morning and puts him to sleep at night.
The vampire slayer. The blond goddess on loan from heaven. They have shared moments as electric and dynamic as a thunderstorm. They have had glimpses of another dimension while in each other's arms yet, she stands here, in front of him, spouting her broken record, Angel, Angel, Angel.
"Okay, Buffy I get it!"
"No, you don't, Xander. All you have ever given me on this was grief.
Xander goes up to her. He grabs her by the shoulders.
"Will you please shut up, Buffy."
"No, I won't! I love Angel, Xander. Deal!"
Xander has to back down. The next step will be a fistfight and he knows it.
"Fine, slayer, you love dead boy."
"Next subject! Despite your little slayer tantrum in there, we both know you almost died last night, too. It is stupid for you to patrol alone and you know it."
"You think you're big stuff now, don't you Xander?"
"I've had enough of your bratiness today, I'm leaving. I'll be at your house at eight."
He walks out of the office and the library.
Buffy's heart is very heavy. But, she had to say those things to Xander. Her love for Angel is safe. It is her security. She can't be out there with Xander. It's too scary. He's too scary.
Xander is lost now. His love for Buffy brings him nothing but grief.
But, she can't deny the fire between us.
Do the lights go out for two blocks when she and fang boy kiss?
Last night when we kissed she didn't even know her name.
Angel is her soul mate, Bullshit!
He has to calm himself. Bring himself to the right place. The right place where Buffy is the chosen one and he is her White Knight. Loving Buffy Summers means doing what needs to be done to make her life bearable. He has to bring comfort to her. That is his job. That's what he agreed to do when she didn't die in the master's lair.
This is his focus. This is why he lives.
Part Eigth: Who Said It Couldn't Get Worse?
Xander meets Buffy for patrol. She is in a very bad mood. He knows it is because of the way he left the meeting. He walks in front of her, stopping.
He addresses her very lovingly and gently. "Buffy, I know we had a bad day today. Last night was awful. We didn't know if we were going to make it. I know it killed you to leave me."
Xander continuing, "I respect what you said, Buffy. About Angel, I mean. I'm sorry for how I've acted in the past."
Buffy is shocked.
Every time I think I have him figured out he goes and blows my mind. Now he is being sensitive. Part of me is listening to what he is saying. Another part of me wants to punch him in the mouth.
What is he trying to do to me?
Xander continues. "The most important thing for me right now is that we be friends. Can we call a truce?"
Buffy thinks for a minute. Then she sighs. "Xander, we are friends."
"Okay, does that mean a truce is in effect?"
The slayer nods.
"Well, that's just about the neatest thing I've ever heard. Now we can be bosom buddies…I mean.. Well, what exactly do I mean? No other word seems to fit in there. I guess we can't be buddies, after all."
"Xander, are you going to drive me crazy tonight?"
Going over to her, putting his arm around her. "Well, that depends. What do you do when you get crazy? Are you like, monster slayer from hell or, are you like, somebody cure my major-libido-overload, girl?"
"Xander, where do you come up with the things that come out of your mouth?"
"They come from a very deep study of the human race."
"Let me guess. Your textbooks for this study come from the adult section of the Sunnydale book store?"
"My God, Buffy. Do you think I would be caught dead in such a place? What do you take me for?"
"I see, you have subscriptions for them, right?"
"You make me feel so cheap!"
The slayer stops. Xander did it again! I felt like crap when I came out tonight. Now I feel like everything is okay.
Xander looks at her. She is staring at him. "What?"
"Xander, come here please?"
He walks over to her. She takes him in an embrace, putting her head down on his shoulder. Xander can hear her sniffing back tears.
The tender moment is very abruptly interrupted. It's a presence they both know well.
"Would you look at that, Drusilla, two losers comforting each other."
The slayer glares at him. "What do you want, Angel?"
"Sorry, honey, he ain't here no more. But, you can still see him in me. That is so moving. I love it, sort of gives me the edge I'd say."
Xander has had enough of this shit! He walks right up to the vampire.
"Listen, you bloodsucking asshole! Leave her the hell alone!"
"Down boy!" He looks past him to Buffy, who has her mouth open.
"What have you been feeding him, slayer?"
"If you came to fight, let's go!
Buffy grabs his arm as he starts to swing at the daemon.
"Xander, don't, he'll hurt you!"
Angelus is as shocked as Buffy that he offered him out like that. He starts to walk away. He stops, trying to get the advantage back.
"You should listen to her, boy."
Xander screams, trying to get around Buffy. "I'm here, asshole, I'm here!"
Angelus disappears into the darkness from which he came.
Xander is so pissed off he can't see straight. Buffy tries to go to him. She can not allow him to think he could ever tangle with Angelus. Angelus is the big time!
"Xander, what the hell do you think you are doing?"
Xander looks at her but doesn't say anything. She stopped him from attacking that monster. He does not want to go off on her. He puts his head down, trying to catch his breath and calm his anger. She doesn't stop, however.
"I cannot allow you to do that, Xander! That was Angelus as in, Angelus the super vampire, remember? He would rip you apart and you know it. You have to tell me you won't do that, again."
All Xander can think about is that Angelus is terrorizing him and the woman he loves but Buffy still somehow loves him. She has had many opportunities to kill the undead bastard but can't. Everybody who dies from now on is on her. This tears him apart.
This flower, this wonderful, beautiful woman he loves cannot put the stake to this monster. Angel or no Angel, the son of a bitch has to die! He has done enough!
Xander stands up, looking into Buffy's eyes. They stare at each other. Buffy doesn't like what she sees.
"What, Xander? Why are you looking at me like that?"
Xander does not want to share his feelings right now. He turns around and starts to walk away. Buffy runs in front of him. She puts her arms on his shoulders. She can feel him looking right into her soul.
She begins to well up. "Xander, please, don't look at me like that."
He reaches out to her face. When he touches her she moves closer to him. He holds her for a minute. Buffy raises her head to look into his eyes. When she does she sees his concern and love for her but the other look is gone. She can't help it. She reaches for his lips. They begin a kiss. The now familiar intensity begins to mount.
But, then it stops abruptly. They break off contact.
They both felt something. Something not good.
"Xander, you felt that?"
"Buffy, what the hell was that?"
"We have to get out of here!"
They leave the cemetery, frantic.
Buffy's house is first. They burst in.
Joyce is okay. They even call Buffy's father. He is fine, also.
They look at each other. They run outside. Xander's house is next.
As they get closer the feeling of dread gets stronger. Approaching the porch they see the door open.
They slowly approach the house. It is dark inside except for a small lamp light in the kitchen. They walk toward it. Xander slowly opens the kitchen door. He freezes. For a moment every thing seems to stop.
His eyes drift to a chair at the table. Sitting on the chair is somebody who looks to be Xander's father. He is slumped over onto the table. Sticking out of his back is a huge butcher's knife.
Then he sees a shadow of something by the refrigerator. Coming in a few more steps he sees what it is. A rope is tied to a big hook on the ceiling. On the other end is a noose tied around his mother's neck. She is hanging there, her neck obviously broken, staring in his direction.
Buffy has to run outside to throw up.
Xander falls on his knees, putting his head down. He is too stunned to do anything.
He looks back up after a few seconds to make sure this isn't an allusion. When he does his mother raises her head. She puts both hands on the rope, slipping the noose from her neck. Then, she jumps down to the ground. She promptly walks up to Xander and uppercuts him to the chin. He rolls on the ground but jumps up. He backs away from his mother as she menacingly approaches him.
"What's the matter, Alexander, something have you a little spooked?"
He continues to back up. His mother stops. She looks at the form of his father slumped over the chair. "Herbert, Alexander won't come to momma."
His father gets up off the chair, walking toward his wife. "Oh, dear, would you take this cumbersome knife out of my back?"
Xander is still frozen. Buffy hears the voices. She rushes back in.
"Oh look, Alex, it's that slayer girl. The one who keeps hurting Xander."
The monster that was once Xander's step father gets closer to the slayer. He morphs into his vamp face. Buffy jumps back thinking he is going to attack.
"Well, thank you slayer. He deserves all the pain you can give him."
With this they both start laughing hysterically, leaving by the kitchen door.
Xander's mother stops for one last comment.
"We will see you around, Xander."
Buffy and Xander stare at the door for a minute, not quite believing what just happened.
The slayer reacts first. She runs to Xander, throwing her arms around him. He doesn't respond.
"I'm so sorry, Xander."
Buffy is crying to break her heart but Xander is still frozen in shock. After a few minutes he looks down at Buffy. He speaks to her very quietly.
"Buffy."
She looks up at him.
"Go home, Buffy."
"Xander, no! That was your mother and father. I'm your friend. I'm more than your friend. Don't shut me out of this."
"I can't, Buff. I…I have to figure this out. I…I have to think."
Buffy continues to try to reach him. She looks up at him, fondling his face.
"I can't stay here, Buffy."
"Okay, Xander, we'll go someplace."
He looks at Buffy. He does not want to see anybody right now, least of all her.
"Buffy, please, I need to be alone."
Hurt that he doesn't want her to comfort him. "Xander, what are you saying?"
Even in his grief he doesn't want to hurt the slayer. He takes her hands in his. "Buffy, I have to go somewhere, alone, to piece this together. I know we're friends. Please respect what I am saying. Go home. I'll get in touch with you in a few days."
"You're leaving, Xander?"
Xander starts crying. He has got to get away from Buffy. Right now all he can think about is that Angelus did this. She could have killed him but, didn't. But, he does not want to have it out with her. He does not want to vent his anger on her. It might tear her apart. He pleads with her through his tears.
"Please, Buffy, I 'm begging you. Just let me alone."
Buffy may never have been as sad in her life as she is now. This boy/man in front of her is unbelievable. He stands behind her, beside her anywhere she wants him to stand. He has helped her, saved her, even told her off when she needed it.
But, in his greatest hour of need he has to go it alone. It's not that she doesn't understand, she does. In her most desperate and saddest moments she felt completely alone, also. She had people, most of all, Willow. But, for some reason she still felt alone. During the darkest midnight she had only herself to rely on. This self-reliance comes from having to deal with evil all the time.
This is how you survive Hellmouth but there is a certain tragic quality to it. It separates you from everyone else. She knows this is what Xander is feeling, now. It breaks her heart to see him like this. She wishes she could help.
The slayer reluctantly leaves. She goes to Willow's house. They go up to her room.
"Buffy, what's wrong?"
"Willow, we were in the cemetery. Xander and I were… We both felt this awful pain. I don't know how but we both knew it was either my family or…"
She breaks down.
"Buffy, is your Mom okay?"
Getting herself under control. "Yes but Xander's…Willow, his dad was slumped over the table with…with a knife in his back.
Willow puts her hands to her mouth. She begins to rock back and forth.
"His mother… his mother was hanged."
She can't finish. She and Willow hug.
Willow speaks. "Where is Xander, Buffy? Where is Xander?"
"Will, he wants to be alone on this. He's really being hard on this."
"Oh my God, Buffy!"
"I didn't tell you all of it. After I saw them I had to go to the porch. I heard voices inside. I went back in. Will, they're both…they're both vampires."
They cry on each other's shoulders for a long time. Finally, Buffy breaks.
"Willow, we have to tell the others."
Go on to Part Nine
Send Feedback
Go Back to the Fanfic Main Page
Buffy and the Slayerettes are Property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and the WB. No Copyright Infringement is Intended.