Part Eleven: Peace Can Be So Fragile
Buffy has had it with her life. She has to spend all of her time either killing scum or training to kill scum. It has her down. She wants her Angel back. But, it isn't simple anymore. What about Xander? Then it occurs to her. Xander never told her what he found out with his trip to the underground.
I'll bet Angelus killed his parents. I'll bet he is training to face Angelus.
She has to find out.
Xander is pissed off, too. His reasons are different, however. When he started training it was for one purpose. He was going to challenge Angelus. If the thought of that wasn't bad enough, he knew he would have to go through the slayer to do it.
But, why? How the hell can she possibly still be in love with the bloodsucker?
When Buffy comes into the library for the after school meeting she is single minded. She approaches Giles.
"Okay, Giles, yes or no question. Angelus killed Xander's parents, didn't he?"
He just shakes his head. "Buffy."
"Nice no answer, answer, Giles." She goes right to Xander.
"This whole training, it's to get Angel, isn't it?"
Not liking the tone in her voice he starts to walk away. She follows after him. She gets in front of him.
"You know, Xander, you might be able to handle one or two monsters but, don't ever think you are on the level of Angelus!"
Xander is disgusted. "I'm not going to listen to this shit." The boy starts to leave again.
The slayer continues her verbal assault. "We'll get Angel back then everything will be okay."
Something in Xander snaps. He turns around, going back to her.
"Why are you doing this?"
"I don't want you thinking you are ready for the big time. You're strictly a civilian."
Xander is getting very upset. He knows Buffy is playing some stupid game with him.
"I stopped being a civilian the first time your daemon lover sent a monster after me."
"I knew it. Did you hear that, Giles? Tell him there's only one slayer."
Giles just looks at her. She turns back to Xander.
"I don't want you to come on patrol with me any more. And, some advice from me to you, don't try to mess with any of the big boys."
Xander can't help himself. He has to reply. "You have the guts to be in my face with this?"
Xander knows Buffy is really upset. He doesn't want to fan the flames. He walks to her.
"Stop this, Buffy, please?"
"Then you stop it. Whatever you are doing. Whatever you are doing to me. What the hell are you, Xander?"
"Whatever I am I was forced into by your lover boy."
"You hate Angel. You've always hated him. And the reason is because I love him and not you! I don't need you hanging around me thinking something is going to happen because it isn't. Even if there were no Angel I still wouldn't love you."
The hurt on Xander's face is evident. The pain reaches deep inside him and Buffy knows it.
After recovering he goes to her. He claps his hands together several times.
"Wonderful performance, Buffy!"
"If we're being brutal and honest here, it goes both ways. The only reason you're attacking me about your precious Angel is because you have an idea that I might be able to get in the same ring with him."
"A blood sucking vampire and you're afraid for him!"
This sets her off. "I'll be damned! You really think you are a bad ass now, don't you?"
She walks face to face with him. "You think you're up there with the best? Let's see how good you are right now?"
Giles tries to stop her. "Buffy."
"No, we need to know. Prove yourself!" She pushes him. He tries to cool it. He grabs her arms.
"Stop it, Buffy!"
"Let go of my arms, Xander!"
"Come on, Buff. We'll go someplace to talk about it."
She knocks his hands off of her then, kicks him. His knee buckles. She jumps on him, pinning him to the floor.
"What are you going to do now, Xander?"
"Are you going to stake me, Buff?"
"Just stay out of the fight until you grow up."
Xander sees red. He pushes his knees up into Buffy's back. It knocks her forward. Then he throws her off of him. He jumps up. She throws a punch at him. He grabs her fist throwing it back at her body. She is frozen for the moment.
"Alright, Buffy, I'm tired of your nasty ass brat routine. I'm sorry, Giles. If you're going to vent your anger at me then you're no better then the other freaks in Hellmouth.
"Now, I hate to burst your little bubble, slayer princess. But, your boy knew I loved you a long time ago. It never bothered him. Why does it bother him, now?"
"What has changed, Buffy?"
She tries to look away from him but he won't let her "What has all of a sudden changed, Buffy? Why does he think he has to get me, now?"
She doesn't answer.
"You don't even know what's in your own heart, do you?"
With disdain he continues, "He started sending his monkeys after me because you started to have feelings for me. He knows you better than you know yourself."
"I never wanted any of this shit, Buffy. It came to me because of you. But, I want to declare this right out in the open in front of everybody. The place you were in my heart has now been replaced with pain. And what is the pain? You're right, it's him. You couldn't stake the bastard so now I get attacked twice a week and my parents are both vampires." "You are out of my heart, Buffy. Do the same with me! No more shit for you!
"And, one last thing. If I ever get a chance to take that son of a bitch out I don't care if he's Angel or Angelus or Ronald McDonald, he's going down! If your on his arm…."
Turning to the others. "I'm through! Have fun with her, just don't say anything bad about the bloodsucker!"
Buffy has tears in her eyes now. The slayer's anger left her when Xander told her he was being attacked because of her, because of her feelings for him. She didn't know it was that evident.
Xander is still not finished. "I just want to say one more time. You are out of my heart, babe."
He spits on the floor in front of her then leaves.
Everybody is flabbergasted. Buffy is wiped out. She slumps in a chair. She doesn't exactly know what happened but she does know that Xander is through with her. She hurt him for the last time. She can't believe the look on his face when she told him she could never love him.
All Xander does is try to help her and make her slayer life a little easier and all she does is hurt him. She can't believe how bad she feels. She has always had Xander. She has always had his love. Now, she blew it. Maybe she doesn't deserve him in her life, anyway.
Willow sees the look on Buffy's face. She tries to console her.
"Buffy the tremendous hurt you felt when Angel turned. I don't think many people know how much it destroyed you."
"Thanks Will but, I think I have a bigger problem. Did I just do what I think I did?"
"Do you mean humiliate and physically attack Xander and then make him tear you out of his heart, twice, then drop you as a friend and all of us, too?"
"I think that about sums it up."
"Well, you did that. You get extreme passing marks for that."
"What am I going to do?"
Giles feels he has to butt in at this point. With Xander leaving the group is in chaos. He has to bring them back together.
Looking at Buffy. "You're going to learn from what you just did. First, everything Xander just said was correct. You were wrong.
"But, you are still the slayer and the rest of us are still a team. Xander will not abandon us. He just can't stand to be around You, Buffy."
"Thanks for that, Giles."
"Most of what happened tonight can be traced to the feelings you kids have for each other. I normally allow these interactions because you have a way of keeping each other honest, however brutally. But, this time it was different. Buffy, you have got to learn to deal with things at the appropriate time. That boy should not have had to deal with any of that tonight."
"I want everyone to learn from this."
After the meeting Buffy goes home, exhausted. She lies on her bed, thinking.
I feel like my heart is broken all over again. There is no way out of the pain of Angel. Alive or dead, soul or no soul, there is nothing but pain.
Then, I have somebody like Xander totally in love with me. What do I do, I rip his heart out and trample it on the ground.
Now he feels like me. There's a pain where his heart use to be…where I use to be.
So, what's left?
Just the duty. Just the job. Be the slayer. All the rest is what Giles calls, matters of the heart.
Xander is furious. Instead of coming to me she has to attack me. Why? Why can't she just look around? I'm here. I'm always here. I have everything she needs, too.
Xander goes to his house. Linda gave him some of her special wine. He grabs some of his favorite "Poor me" blues CD's. He throws them on the player. He grabs some paper and a pen. In between gulps of wine he begins to write of his favorite subject, His unrequited love for Buffy Anne Summers, The vampire slayer.
In the beginning, I saw you…A goddess, a creature down from heaven to light my path. My heart ached, pounded…Almost out of me to you.
You didn't see it. Then I learned. You are slayer. No ordinary girl. Special. Hell, I could have told you that! I joined. I came beside you. I stood behind you. My shoulder there when the terror came. You didn't see me. I faced my fear, swallowed my fright, and kept guard while you lay sick. Night after night kept both eyes on your back. Watched you. Helped you stay strong. All the time my heart breaking for your eye, your hand, your lips, your… But, you don't feel me!
He gets disgusted, throwing the pad of paper across the room.
"Why can't I stop loving her!"
"I don't want to love her!"
He continues his tirade, out loud.
"What the hell does she have on me?"
Xander cannot stop caring for Buffy but he can hide it. The thought of Buffy patrolling alone terrifies him. He follows her to the cemetery but, stays out of sight.
Everybody has the same idea. Rebecca, Giles, Willow and Oz as well as Cordelia are there, also.
Things go fine for awhile. One or two vamps but nothing major.
Then, the air gets heavy. The birds stop singing. Even the crickets stop. Sensing this, Xander joins the group. The scene is so tense nobody else even says anything to him.
He joins Buffy in the middle of the cemetery. She looks at him wide-eyed. He shrugs his shoulders. She continues to stare.
"What?"
The slayer smiles. "I never thought I'd see you here!"
"The only way I can explain it is that you're like the female Rhinoceros. The female Rhinoceros does something to the male Rhinoceros. No matter how hard he tries. No matter what he does, he can't leave her. Something keeps forcing him back to her."
The slayer stops. She furrows her brow.
"You made that up, didn't you?"
"If you went to school more you would know such things."
"Ha, that's a joke coming from you. I go more than you do."
"Sure you do."
"Okay, smart alec, what's your average in Biology?"
"Do I even have Biology?"
Laughing, "I have a B+ average."
"No, you don't!"
"Ask, Giles."
He turns around to Giles. "Does she have a B+ average in Biology, Giles?"
Giles can't believe they are talking about something so mundane when all this evil is in the air.
"Are you two aware that there is a definite aura of evil all about us?"
Xander looks back to Buffy. "You better not be getting better marks than me."
Their discussion is interrupted by the presence of Angelus. He is not alone, either. Spike, Drusilla and another evil looking woman flank him.
The new woman's name is Carla. She is about Rebecca's height and build. She is fashionably dressed but, all in black. The woman has shoulder length black hair tied back in a ponytail. She exudes power and confidence and evil. Angelus comes up to the gang paying special attention to Rebecca. He speaks to Buffy first.
"Well, if it isn't my die hard ex. How's the pain coming, babe?
"Rebecca, my God, I haven't seen you since… well, since a real long time ago. And, Xander, how's Xander? Is she still breaking your heart?"
Rebecca steps up, speaking, "I missed you last time I was scum hunting. You must have been out sucking some gutter snipe for blood."
When Rebecca sees Carla she visibly cringes. Xander sees it. He starts to go to her but then backs off. Rebecca speaks. "Christ, Carla, you came right to me. I thought I'd have to sniff your daemon ass out in a pig sty somewhere."
"Rebecca, what would life be like without you?"
"You came in the front door this time?"
Pointing toward the rest of the gang. "They told me you had help. So, this is your army?
The daemon walks among them. "Let's see, we have one slayer… one watcher, assorted others with mild powers and…"
She stops in front of Xander, looking at him, then back at Rebecca. "I'm impressed, Becky, where did you come up with him?"
She speaks to Xander. "I wouldn't mind having you before I cut your head off."
Carla fondles Xander's cheek. "Think you're man enough to handle me?"
"Why do I think you'd be better served by a well endowed sewer rat?"
Rebecca breaks out in a hardy laugh. "He's good, Rupert!"
Carla puts on her game face. She is quite formidable. She grabs Xander's throat with her claw. It is terrifying. Buffy makes a move toward her. She lets him go.
"I've changed my mind. I'm going to get pleasure bringing you to a slow death. You're on my shit list now, boy."
"You'll have to take a ticket to get my ass."
Xander's attitude is really scaring the rest of the crew.
Buffy can't hide it though. She is impressed.
Xander isn't finished. When he looks at these daemons all he can think of is his parents.
"All this reunion shit is nice but, why don't we just get the damn thing started!"
Xander shakes out a stake from his sleeve. He takes the crossbow from Giles, handing it to Buffy.
"Which one of you freaks is first?"
Carla is really mad at being upstaged. "You insolent pup!"
Angelus chimes in. "Poor Xander is mad."
Xander makes an attempt to go after him. Buffy stops him.
"Xander, don't!"
Angelus has to make one more comment. "Yea, hide behind your protector."
He pushes past the slayer but Angelus is gone.
"I'm here, I'm here!"
Buffy goes to him trying to calm him down. "Will you calm down, Xander?"
He throws the stake down. "God dam freak!" He looks at Buffy.
"You're going to get in my way once too often, slayer!"
She gently grabs his arms, looking into his eyes.
"Xander, they're gone."
"Next time stay out of my way!"
"But, I was just…"
She doesn't finish. Xander glares at her. She is really taken aback.
She recovers. "What are you trying to do, Xander? You endangered everybody here!"
"No I didn't, Buffy. They weren't going to fight now. We can't let them intimidate us like that. It's a psyche thing."
Rebecca speaks up. "He's right, Buffy, those things make a difference." Buffy is really floored by Xander's actions. It is not unpleasant for her. She actually manages a smile. Even if the slayer doesn't realize it consciously, Xander is pushing his way deeper and deeper into her heart.
She goes back to him. They look at each other for a minute. It is nice, A very non-verbal moment. They haven't had a tender moment together for some time.
The space between them takes on that familiar charge. If this were another place…
Later, at the library the whole gang is there. Xander and Rebecca are off to one side having a private conversation. The rest are reflecting on the evening's festivities.
Willow doesn't like Xander being with Rebecca. "What is going on with Xander?"
Oz comments, "That was too freaky. They were scary people."
"Not! There wasn't a person among them." Cordelia adds.
Willow is scared. "I'm scared for Xander."
"He didn't seem too scared for himself."
"Yea Oz, but that doesn't mean anything. This new Xander is stupid Xander."
Cordelia, almost in tears, "I think he's going to get killed."
Buffy, who is looking at Xander, "Not if I can help it."
Willow can't let it go. "Why did he have to go and get that Carla daemon mad at him, and Angel, too?"
Buffy still stares at Xander. He and Rebecca are talking like they have some special bond. Rebecca is a very wise and good woman but Buffy sees her looking at Xander sometimes with more than friendly eyes.
She is actually jealous.
The fact that Xander's action at the cemetery scared everyone else is one thing. But, he scared her, too.
The slayer turns to Giles. "Giles, who is Carla?"
"She is an age old daemon who has wrecked havoc on this world for a long, long time, mostly in Europe. Rebecca has been chasing her most of this century. She is very, very formidable. She takes no prisoners."
Xander and Rebecca are talking about Carla, too.
"Rebecca, when you saw Carla you got nervous and all stressed out. That's the first time I ever saw you that way. It was scary."
"You saw that, did you?"
"I'm sorry, Rebecca."
"Carla and her ex, a monster named, Malcolm, wiped out my entire family, much the way Angelus has done to you. I have been chasing her for most of this century."
Rebecca gets very sad. Xander can see her eyes well up. He hugs her. He speaks to her softly as she cries.
"Rebecca, I have never met a person that I have more respect for than you. If you ever need me for anything you are doing, I'm here."
They break the hug. Rebecca looks at Xander, smiling. "Thank you, Xander."
Giles comes over to Rebecca. They go off, arm in arm.
Xander makes a mental note to himself to never pass up any opportunity he has to take that bitch, Carla, out!
Part Twelve: Danger Can Make For Excellent Whoppi!
Buffy is beside herself. She is confused, angry and uncertain. It all has to do with Xander. With all the pressure of being the slayer she isn't able to sort out her feelings the way other girls her age can do. She never has the time or energy to do most of what other girls do.
Everything is so damn intense with her and Xander. Her emotions are always raw when she is around him. Buffy can't think of a single time in her recent memory when she and Xander have just spent normal time together. It seems they are either fighting vamps together or fighting each other. And, this whole thing with him fighting vamps in the first place. She never agreed to him doing it all the time. It just sort of happened.
Xander can't figure life out, either. When he first started out all he wanted to do was help Buffy. That is still, basically, all he wants to do. Everything he does still has something to do with her. But, why is she such a damn bitch to him? She is worse than Cordelia when he first met her.
After a few thoughtless moments something dawns on him. He has figured out why she can't kill Angelus. As evil as he is, he is still her only link to love. She has to hold on to it. The only thing, which separates them from the evil they are facing, is love. If they don't have love, all they have is the violence and the darkness. Buffy is so close to the dark side sometimes. Xander knows because he can feel it, at times, himself.
"Holy Darth Vader!"
He decides to try something. He goes to Giles, getting the okay for he and Buffy to take the night off. Then he makes a call to a place, which delivers singing telegrams.
Buffy is at her house with her mother. A knock comes to the door. Joyce answers it. A young delivery person has a message.
"Ma'am, I have a message for a Buffy, "The Slayer", Summers."
Joyce gets Buffy.
"You are Buffy, The Slayer, Summers?"
Somewhat embarrassed, "Yes, I guess that's me."
"I have a request from Xander, "No middle name", Harris. And it goes like this,
He proceeds to sing a message, very off key,
"Oh please, oh please you slayer, dear.
Find it in your great big heart
to clear,
Some time in your busy retinue,
For a poor guy whose purpose is to woo,
Your attention from all this fuss,
To buy you some dinner, oh please,
you must!"
Buffy just shakes her head, laughing.
"And, he adds, this is the big time, baby! Wear something that will do him proud. If you play your cards right he might take you out stepping, afterwards."
"Is that all?"
"Well, he said one more thing but,..Maybe you could ask your mother to cover her ears or something?"
Buffy looks at her mother.
"Oh, well how about if I wait inside?" She closes the door.
After a minute Buffy comes back in laughing. Joyce stares at her.
"What, Mom?"
"Are you going?"
"I might."
"What was the last part?"
Buffy just smiles.
"That was as corny as hell, Buffy, but, it was really cute."
"I know."
Buffy actually has a spring in her step as she runs upstairs. She stands in front of the mirror, looking at herself.
This is so typically Xander. He knew, somehow I needed something like this. I am not going to turn him down this time. I'm not going to let the pain get the best of me. Xander knows about me. He wants to do this. Maybe it's time to trust him for once. I'm just going to go with the flow this time.
As she gets herself ready she feels light. She's not getting ready to go slaying or to meet the master. She is getting ready for a big date. A date with a guy who knows all about her. A guy just as heavy as she.
Buffy has not felt this good in ages. It surprises her that she actually knows much about what turns Xander on…
Wait a minute! I can't believe I am doing this!
I accepted a date with Xander and, now I'm getting ready And, I actually know what he likes?
"Oh well, go with the flow, Buffy."
When Xander gets word that Buffy accepted his offer he leaps for joy. He is going to do it up large!
As he looks at himself in the mirror he notices how really dark and brooding his face has gotten in the past months. He lets out a little laugh to himself.
"Just the way she likes it!"
For once The Hellmouth has worked for him, yes!"
Hoping that Buffy would accept, Xander made reservations at a very nice restaurant. The one thing Xander doesn't have to worry about is money. Unfortunately this brings him little consolation. Right now it is paying for him to go out with Buffy so, he'll take it.
Buffy comes down the steps, ready for Xander. Her mother is there.
"Wow, Buffy, you really pulled out all the stops, didn't you?"
"I haven't felt this excited in a long time, mom."
"This boy, Xander, he is more than just your friend?"
"I really don't know what he is, mom."
"If it means anything to you, Buffy, he certainly knows how to ask a girl out in style."
Xander is really nervous as he steps to Buffy's porch. He is really decked out. He hopes Buffy notices.
He has two bouquets of flowers. He knocks on the door. Joyce answers. She definitely notices Xander's digs.
"Hello, Xander. Come in."
"Hello, Ms Summer's." After coming in he hands her one of the bunches of flowers.
"These are for you, Ms Summers, for having such a wonderful daughter. I'm sure she takes after you."
Joyce takes them. She is really impressed. "Thank you Xander. Buffy comes over to him. Xander looks at her.
"Oh my God!" He is suspended with his mouth open.
Buffy has a similar reaction herself. She has never seen Xander look this..This, wow!
Joyce laughs at them as neither says a word nor moves an inch. She tries to intervene. She tries to take the other bouquet of flowers from Xander.
"Are these for Buffy, Xander?"
Xander still can't answer. Joyce turns to Buffy. "Honey, I think these flowers are for you."
"What? Oh, yes. Thank you Xander." She tries to take the flowers from his hand but he won't let go.
Touching him on the arm "Xander, are these for me?"
Finally snapping out of it. "Oh, yea, these are for you."
Joyce can't help it. She runs to get her camera.
"I know this isn't the prom or anything but, I have to have pictures of you two. Is that okay, honey?"
"Yes, mom, it's okay."
Joyce takes picture after picture. Finally, Buffy and Xander get out the door. Xander stops. He goes back to Joyce.
"Thank you so much for your daughter!" He hugs her. He actually hugs Buffy's mother. When he goes back to Buffy she is shocked.
They get in the car. Buffy is still staring at Xander.
"Xander, you didn't actually hug my mother, did you?"
"Oh, Buffy, it had to be done. Somebody has to be thanked for bringing you into the world."
Buffy can only close her eyes and shake her head. The boy is very definitely nuts but his romantic ways are really charming the hell out of her.
Thus go the ways of the heart!
"Xander, you brought flowers for my mother!"
"Buffy, let me ask you a question? I won't press it or anything, I promise. Did you.. Did you wear what you are wearing and look the way you look with me in mind?"
Buffy is really embarrassed. Busted!
Trying to play it cool. "I think maybe that question is sort of..Well something which can't really be answered."
"What?"
Changing the subject. "Did you make up the little rhyme that kid sang?"
"Yea, I have some poetic stuff in me."
Buffy closes her eyes.
"Are you okay, Buffy?"
"Yea, Xander, I am."
The dinner is very nice. Xander is continuing his charming ways.
"That dinner was very good, Xander, thank you."
"Buffy, we both need this."
Xander has some other surprises for Buffy. They don't go to the Bronze to dance. They go to a nightclub, a fancy one.
Buffy is wide-eyed as they enter. Xander explains. "We're dressed way too good for the Bronze, Buff."
"Besides, I'm about to show you a part of myself I have kept hidden. I'm only unveiling it for tonight. You are sworn to secrecy under pain of death."
"What are you going to do now, mystery man?"
They get a table. He leads her to the dance floor. A very danceable fast record is playing. Xander proceeds to dance, in time with the music and with moves, which could actually be called smooth.
More than smooth.
Down right good, even!
If Xander's intention was to impress Buffy, he is succeeding, royally.
Buffy is very good, herself, of course.
They proceed to dance to each other and, for each other.
Our two heroes are not heroes tonight, except to each other.
They are not Buffy the vampire slayer and the boy wonder, right now.
They are two good looking, high stepping young people on a mission. They have to move to the music, make their bodies dip and sway and rock until they bring that beat home!
It is serious business and they both set themselves to the task.
The results are ass kicking to say the least! They are both zonked into it.
When a slow dance comes on they practically melt to each other's arms. Buffy finds herself getting as close to Xander as is possible. He readily accommodates her. Mid way through the song Buffy has to sniff back tears. Xander pulls away, looking at her.
"Honey, do you want to go home or something?"
Too embarrassed to say more. "Just dance, Xander, just dance."
They dance most of the night away. They haven't said much in words but they have never had as good a conversation as they have had tonight. Buffy is beyond moved. They sit at the table. Xander looks at Buffy.
"I think I'm danced out, Buff."
She doesn't say anything. Xander leads her to the car. They begin to drive home. Buffy has a very funny look on her face.
"Buffy, I don't want to keep asking you but, are you okay?"
"Xander, I don't know what to say." She starts to cry. Xander pulls over. He goes to her side of the car.
"Buffy we have really rough lives. You have had so much heartache."
Through tears, "So have you, Xander. So have you."
"I know. I wanted to make this a special night for the both of us."
"Xander, it is. Everything is perfect. I've had an unbelievable time. I..I just.."
She doesn't finish.
"Buffy, I knew this would blow you away." He fondles her face. "Look, you need to keep hold of your love for Angel. I know that, now. He's your connection to the only goodness you've had in your life. It's okay, Buffy. I'm not trying to replace him.
Xander continues. "I'm able to forgive you for not killing, Angelus. I thought I couldn't do it. I thought I was going to hate you, forever. But, now I get it.
Xander starts to cry. Buffy moves closer to him, putting her arm around him.
"Xander, Angel is not the only good I've had in my life. When we were dancing back there. I wasn't pinning for anyone else, Xander. I knew who I was with."
They look into each other's eyes. There is no distance between them this time. Tonight already took care of that.
The kiss is very tender. It needs to be. They both need comforting. The baggage these two are forced to carry around with them would leave any soul tattered and torn.
They fondle and caress each other knowing they have to help heal one other. This damn business they are both in is relentless and unforgiving. Nobody knows it any better than they know it.
"These past couple of months, Buffy, I've felt lost and alone. Now I know what you've been dealing with as the slayer. It's terrifying. Day after day, night after night, every time something goes bump in the night it's some freak trying to kill somebody."
"Xander, I know I haven't been any support for you, at all. Not even I have as many things after me as you do, now. I know you're not even telling us about all of them. And I know that most of it is my fault."
The slayer continues, "It scares me. You scare me."
"Buffy, anything I have is for you. Any contact I make. Any strength I have. You're the slayer, Buffy. All I want to do is try to make your life a little a little easier."
Buffy starts to well up. "Xander, I'm trying to keep myself in control, here. If you keep this up I'll be…"
He doesn't let her finish. He starts the car, again. He zooms off toward his house.
"The night is not over, yet. We have this one night to experience things we normally wouldn't experience."
They get to his house. Xander pulls the love seat in front of the fireplace. He tells Buffy to start a fire. He starts to leave but stops. He looks back at Buffy.
"Ah, Buff, when I say start a fire you do know I mean in the fire place, right?"
She has to laugh. "Very funny, Xander."
"Just checking. You know, with your reputation and all!"
"Go do whatever it is you are going to do before I decide you are trying to seduce me, here, Lavelle."
"Ugh, the hated last name! Now you have done it missy."
He continues talking to her as he goes to the dining room, taking two wineglasses from the china closet.
"Now, I will laugh at you hysterically when this stuff curls your toes."
He gets a bottle of Linda's wine. He pours them both a glass.
"What is this stuff, Xander?"
"Just remember, Buff, we are young and carefree, just for tonight. Drink from the nectar of the Gods."
Buffy looks at it suspiciously but she did say she was going to trust Xander, tonight.
"Oh well." She takes a big gulp. Her eyes widen as the smooth sailing sauce rolls toward her stomach.
Buffy is not a drinker. She can't afford to be with her line of work. But, this stuff.
Oh, baby!
"Is this a potion or something?"
"I don't really know everything that's in it but, I think it's just wine."
Taking some more, "Xander, this is very good!"
They stare at the fire. Buffy's momentary high passes as she thinks of where she is. This is Xander's house. His house which he now lives in, alone.
All the terror of that night comes back to her. She looks at Xander.
"What is it Buff?"
"Xander, I'm sorry. I can't help thinking of that night.."
She doesn't finish but she doesn't need to finish. He knows which night she is talking about.
"I know you don't want to talk about it, Xander."
"No, Buff, actually I do. If you don't mind?"
She gets closer to him, fondling his face.
"It's something I never even thought could happen. I never told them anything about slaying. It's not something, which even crossed my mind. It was more than a shock, Buff. I mean, they didn't pay too much attention to me anyway but they still loved me in their own way."
"Xander, one of the things which drives me crazy is the thought of you having to come home alone every night."
He reaches his hand to her face. He very carefully outlines her features with his hand. He gently pushes the loose strands of her golden blond hair behind her ears. Buffy is enjoying it very much.
When he gets to her lips she lightly touches his fingers with her tongue. Xander brings his lips closer to the slayer's face. He carefully kisses each of her eyes, first. Then he reaches for her dimples on either side of her mouth. He gently nestles her top lip between his teeth. He does the same with her bottom lip.
By the time he gets to a full kiss they are both on fire. The intensity surpasses all their previous encounters.
When they brake neither can say a word.
Finally, Xander speaks. "Okay, slayer, now we get to see if we're compatible."
Buffy, still reeling from the kiss, "Compatible, what does that kiss show?"
"This is the real test." He tells her to finish her glass of wine, which she does. Then he fills her glass, again. He takes it, putting one side of it up to his mouth. He invites her to do the same with the other side. Then they both hold it with their teeth. Xander takes his hand off of it. So, now the full glass of wine is suspended between them with only their teeth holding it. Buffy starts to laugh. She has to take it from her mouth.
"Xander, what are we doing?"
"If we are compatible we will both be able to drink the wine at the same time."
"Are you serious?"
"This is really important."
"I can't believe I am going to do this. If you tell anybody I'll deny it."
"Stop staling, Buffy."
Xander raises the glass to his lips. Buffy grabs her side. Xander drops his hand.
When Buffy tries to drink the wine it spills, down her cheek to her neck and then places below. Xander watches the precious liquid on its journey. He grabs the glass.
"Oh no, the juice from the Gods has spilled. It must be retrieved at all costs!"
He jumps on Buffy, slurping the spilled wine from her neck and below.
Buffy can't believe he is doing this! "Xander! Xander!"
He pokes his head up, looking at her.
"What?"
"Are you crazy, I can't breathe!"
"Take a breath."
She does. He dives back in. Buffy starts laughing because, in addition to it doing other things to her, it tickles like crazy. She has to grab his shoulders, pushing him off the love seat.
He falls on the floor. He looks at her.
"You will force me to work from the bottom up!"
She has to pull her feet and legs away from his diving face. She falls, landing on top of him.
"Now, you have pounced on me with your slayer strength."
"Xander, what am I going to do with you?"
They look at each other, intently. This is always a mistake.
There is nothing easy about this kiss. The entire evenings magic has now settled down to the both of them very much in desire and need for each other.
When Buffy agreed to this date she had no idea she was going to be overwhelmed by a flow of love and charm and warmth. From the very beginning this night was done with class and nerve and spice. Add a little bit of sauce and you have the whole story.
This Xander Harris is dangerous in more ways than one!
The duo spark and sizzle and squeak, doing their love to a melody all their own.
However, we do have to remember boys and girls, where our heroes live.
This is Hellmouth!
Even amidst the billowing passion and pathos of their true and fine union, Xander and Buffy can still sense danger a good thirty seconds before it strikes.
Xander stiffens, his eyes popping open with alarm. Buffy immediately feels the same thing. "Shit, Buffy!"
Go on to Part Thirteen
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Buffy and the Slayerettes are Property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and the WB. No Copyright Infringement is Intended.