This is just a short fanfiction about Paige and her situation. It's just,
"Shout" and "She-bop" in my own words. What I think could have happened.
This takes place like a week or less after that party, where the whole
thing started. Noone knows about it, except for Paige and Dean. That's all.
Oh and by the way, the story was inspired by, (Of course) "Shout and She-
bop" and the song, "Damaged" by TLC.
Damaged
----
I know I'm kinda strange, to you sometimes
don't always say, what's on my mind
you know that I've been hurt, by some guy
But I don't wanna mess up this time ----
"Paige! Hurry up! We're going to be late!" Paige's mother called, from downstairs.
"I'm almost ready!" Paige yelled back. But she wasn't almost ready. Actually, she wasn't even close to that. Paige was still in her Silk Blue Pajamas and her fluffy slippers, as She paced around her room, biting on her newly painted red fingernails.
Paige jumped, "You scared me, mom!" She screeched. Paige's mother looked in disgust as she walked into the room.
"Paige, I don't appreciate you lying to me." Her mother said, turning off Paige's radio. "Its already almost fifth teen-minutes after eight. You want to be even more late?" Her mother asked.
"This room is a pigsty! You better clean it up, right after you get home." Her mother ordered. She sighed," I really don't understand you anymore, Paige." Her mother shut the door. Paige couldn't help but mumbled foul- mouthed words under breath.
If only she would understand me Paige thought to herself maybe I would feel more comfortable about myself and I can tell what's wrong.
Paige took out any matching outfit in her closet that she could find. She looked in the mirror and took a deep breath, "Another day, and a second closer to night." She paused, and started to play around with sequence on the rim of her belt. Paige heard her mom yell for her again, so she started to head downstairs into the car.
As they driving to Degrassi, Paige's mother couldn't help but ask her the most unlikely question that Paige would want anyone to ask her about. She asked Paige about why she was has been so, "Invisible" lately. Why she was never home. Paige just lied and told her she didn't know what she was talking about. She stared at Paige for a moment. Kind of examining her eyes. She acted like she could tell Paige was lying, but she really did know. She knew Paige was keeping something from her. She wanted to find out.
----
And I really, really, really care
And I really, really, really want you
And I think I'm kinda scared
Cos I don't want to lose you
If you really, really, really care
Then maybe you can hang through
I hope you understand
It's nothing to you
----
After Third period, Paige was roaming around the halls for Hazel. She was nowhere to be found. Paige looked and looked and looked. Nowhere. Paige shrugged and turned around. Where she bumped into Spinner.
"Hey, Spin." Paige said with a smile.
"Hi, Paige. How are you?" He said, with a serious tone in his voice.
Paige started to get suspicious, "Fine..what's wrong with you?" She gave a laugh, acting like she didn't know what was going on. When she didn't.
"Oh nothing." Spinner laughed, "Just a little curious." Spinner started to casually walk away from Paige. Paige followed behind him.
"About what?"
"I'm just curious about the fact..." He started to drift off.
Paige started to get really impatient and wanted too much to know what he was talking about to let it go. "What? Tell me." Paige whispered, anxiously.
"I heard somewhere, that you and that guy, were having a blast at that party..." Spinner finally admitted.
"I don't like you lying to me like that. I really care about you, Paige. But I don't think you get it- I don't think you care."
He walked away. Leaving Paige with a Stiff feeling in her body, with the guilt and sadness absorbing it self through her heart and mind. She felt like her heart was the Titanic. Broken into two pieces and small little parts scattered among her ocean.
Paige held back her tears till she went to he bathroom. And She ran as fast her body would allow her too. When she made it to the bathroom, She went straight for the end stall. Brought her legs close to her chest and cried. She cried because she felt lost and alone. Her life-ruined, the boy she really liked and thought was hers- gone. She felt lost. She cried harder. People would say she's over-reacting. But no one would understand her feelings. She couldn't face her mother, Spinner, or anyone else. She cried for the rest of the period. At least, that's how long it felt to Paige.
Suddenly, Paige forced herself to stop crying when she heard the door open and the tapping of heels on the shinny tiled floors. "Hmm.somebody had a rough day?" The person said.
Paige wiped her tears away with a piece of toilet paper, "Isn't it obvious?" Paige replied with a stuffy goggled up voice.
"Well sweetie, what's the problem? I could possibly help."
"No, you can't." Paige protested, "I have an unfixable problem."
"Well, what is it anyway?" The girl asked in a snotty tone.
Paige walked out of the stall, and realized it Courtney Megan from the eleventh grade.
Paige suddenly remembered a sign, her second grade teacher used to have in her room, "M.Y.O.B."
The girl chuckled, "Sweetie, what's the mean? Is that something you little tenth-graders made up or something?"
"No Hon, it's not something we made up. It means Mind Your Own Business!" Paige told Courtney.
"Plus, you were a tenth grader yourself once. So, I wouldn't be talking." Paige stormed out of the bathroom.
"Ha. Here's my own abbreviation, P.M.S." Courtney laughed, facing the door. She then went back to fixing her makeup.
---- My heart's at a low
I'm so much to manage
I think you should know that
I've been damaged
I'm falling in love
There's one disadvantage
I think you should know that I've been damaged
----
Paige finally found Hazel in the cafeteria at lunch. Hazel was sitting around with Jimmy and Spinner. At first Paige was afraid to walk over. But she had too. She took a deep breath and walked over. Spinner noticed her walking over and turned the other way. He was furious. She was scared.
"Hazel," Paige said grabbing Hazel and pulling her to the side. "I need to talk to you." Paige whispered.
"What is it?" Hazel said.
Paige continued to whisper, "Can we talk in the bathroom?"
Hazel became confused. "First tell me why we are whispering."
Paige ignored her comment and pulled her to the bathroom. Hazel walked around the stalls, still puzzled; While Paige sat on the bathroom base of one of the sinks.
"Okay," Hazel began. "What you wanna tell me?"
"Haze, remember Dean?" Paige asked, hoping not to cry.
"That guy you were crushing bad last week? How could I forget! You were in love with him!" Hazel answered.
Paige lowered her head, "Well, now I hate him."
Hazel looked surprised. "Whoa! Why the sudden change?"
Paige lifted her head and revealed to Hazel that she had been crying. "When you decided to go home, I saw Spinner. So, I pulled that asshole, Dean upstairs. Thinking maybe they're was a room where we can hide out for a bit." Paige began between sobs. "Well, at first we were just you know...passionately kissing and stuff as he was telling me how pretty I was and how he really liked me. I accepted it. Then he..... took it to far."
Hazel put her hands on her mouth and walked over towards Paige who was hysterically in tears. Hazel held her friend in her arms and tried to console as much as she could.
"Hazel, I really liked him- he made me feel special. He made me feel safe around him. When really he was actually making me non-safe around him. I kept saying no, no, and more no's but he wouldn't listen!" Paige cried.
Hazel pulled away from Paige, "Did you see the Police? Did you a doctor?"
"No, I didn't see the police. And I didn't see a doctor because he was a little bit considerate and wore a condom."
"Paige, do you know what Dean did?"
"Besides mentally tear me in half? I don't know. What?"
Hazel paused, "He raped you, Paige. Dean raped you. You can take him to court for sexual assault."
Paige's mind went blank, me? I was raped? Paige thought I hear it happens a lot on the news...but I never thought it would happen to me...
That afternoon, Paige took a walk by herself, to one of the old-looking drugstores down the block from where she lived. She walked in picked up a few magazines, a milkshake, and a candy bar. Paige sat down at one of the benches outside of the store. And began reading her "Twist" Magazine as she took a sip of her milkshake. She flipped through the magazine looking for the certain articles she liked to read first when she got a magazine. She read embarrassing moments. Style tips. Etc. She came across three articles about readers and their lives. She read about a girl being bullied so much that she lost her eye site for a short period of time. And a brother coping over his younger brother's death of drug abuse. Paige then began to read an article about this girl about her age from the US, who had been sexually harassed, had been knocked out and raped at a party. The girl had eventually become pregnant, and was forced with no choice but to put the baby up for adoption. Paige began to cry.
Paige panicked and threw the magazine in the trash. She took a sip of her milkshake, then pulled the beverage away from her mouth and looked at it. "I'm such a pig!" She threw that and the candy bar in the trash and ran home.
When she ran up to her room, she went immediately to her mirror. She gazes at herself.
"Why me?" She asked her reflection. "Why me?!" She screamed. She began to bawl harder.
She felt that her heart was nothing but cold and musty air. She sat on the edge of her bed and but her hands between her legs. She began to think about all the times she was mean to her friends; the ones that never wanted to hurt her. How she was always trying to ruin Ashley's life. How she kept dwelling on the past, when all Ashley wanted was her friends. How she was blaming Hazel for the papers she ripped with Emma's article the year before. How she always thought she was the better one, and how everyone she passed thought of her as this bitchy diva. And how could she forget, how she was mean to Spinner. If she just kept her promise with Spinner, this would have never happened. She wouldn't be feeling this pain, and wouldn't be the target of everyone's pity.
Paige walked back over to her mirror, "Why are some guys so cruel and sick?" She screamed again at her reflection. She couldn't take it anymore. She picked up a chair, and screamed. "I hate my life!" and through the chair right through her standing mirror, and watched as her reflection shattered into little tiny pieces on the floor.
Spinner....
Damaged
----
I know I'm kinda strange, to you sometimes
don't always say, what's on my mind
you know that I've been hurt, by some guy
But I don't wanna mess up this time ----
"Paige! Hurry up! We're going to be late!" Paige's mother called, from downstairs.
"I'm almost ready!" Paige yelled back. But she wasn't almost ready. Actually, she wasn't even close to that. Paige was still in her Silk Blue Pajamas and her fluffy slippers, as She paced around her room, biting on her newly painted red fingernails.
Paige jumped, "You scared me, mom!" She screeched. Paige's mother looked in disgust as she walked into the room.
"Paige, I don't appreciate you lying to me." Her mother said, turning off Paige's radio. "Its already almost fifth teen-minutes after eight. You want to be even more late?" Her mother asked.
"This room is a pigsty! You better clean it up, right after you get home." Her mother ordered. She sighed," I really don't understand you anymore, Paige." Her mother shut the door. Paige couldn't help but mumbled foul- mouthed words under breath.
If only she would understand me Paige thought to herself maybe I would feel more comfortable about myself and I can tell what's wrong.
Paige took out any matching outfit in her closet that she could find. She looked in the mirror and took a deep breath, "Another day, and a second closer to night." She paused, and started to play around with sequence on the rim of her belt. Paige heard her mom yell for her again, so she started to head downstairs into the car.
As they driving to Degrassi, Paige's mother couldn't help but ask her the most unlikely question that Paige would want anyone to ask her about. She asked Paige about why she was has been so, "Invisible" lately. Why she was never home. Paige just lied and told her she didn't know what she was talking about. She stared at Paige for a moment. Kind of examining her eyes. She acted like she could tell Paige was lying, but she really did know. She knew Paige was keeping something from her. She wanted to find out.
----
And I really, really, really care
And I really, really, really want you
And I think I'm kinda scared
Cos I don't want to lose you
If you really, really, really care
Then maybe you can hang through
I hope you understand
It's nothing to you
----
After Third period, Paige was roaming around the halls for Hazel. She was nowhere to be found. Paige looked and looked and looked. Nowhere. Paige shrugged and turned around. Where she bumped into Spinner.
"Hey, Spin." Paige said with a smile.
"Hi, Paige. How are you?" He said, with a serious tone in his voice.
Paige started to get suspicious, "Fine..what's wrong with you?" She gave a laugh, acting like she didn't know what was going on. When she didn't.
"Oh nothing." Spinner laughed, "Just a little curious." Spinner started to casually walk away from Paige. Paige followed behind him.
"About what?"
"I'm just curious about the fact..." He started to drift off.
Paige started to get really impatient and wanted too much to know what he was talking about to let it go. "What? Tell me." Paige whispered, anxiously.
"I heard somewhere, that you and that guy, were having a blast at that party..." Spinner finally admitted.
"I don't like you lying to me like that. I really care about you, Paige. But I don't think you get it- I don't think you care."
He walked away. Leaving Paige with a Stiff feeling in her body, with the guilt and sadness absorbing it self through her heart and mind. She felt like her heart was the Titanic. Broken into two pieces and small little parts scattered among her ocean.
Paige held back her tears till she went to he bathroom. And She ran as fast her body would allow her too. When she made it to the bathroom, She went straight for the end stall. Brought her legs close to her chest and cried. She cried because she felt lost and alone. Her life-ruined, the boy she really liked and thought was hers- gone. She felt lost. She cried harder. People would say she's over-reacting. But no one would understand her feelings. She couldn't face her mother, Spinner, or anyone else. She cried for the rest of the period. At least, that's how long it felt to Paige.
Suddenly, Paige forced herself to stop crying when she heard the door open and the tapping of heels on the shinny tiled floors. "Hmm.somebody had a rough day?" The person said.
Paige wiped her tears away with a piece of toilet paper, "Isn't it obvious?" Paige replied with a stuffy goggled up voice.
"Well sweetie, what's the problem? I could possibly help."
"No, you can't." Paige protested, "I have an unfixable problem."
"Well, what is it anyway?" The girl asked in a snotty tone.
Paige walked out of the stall, and realized it Courtney Megan from the eleventh grade.
Paige suddenly remembered a sign, her second grade teacher used to have in her room, "M.Y.O.B."
The girl chuckled, "Sweetie, what's the mean? Is that something you little tenth-graders made up or something?"
"No Hon, it's not something we made up. It means Mind Your Own Business!" Paige told Courtney.
"Plus, you were a tenth grader yourself once. So, I wouldn't be talking." Paige stormed out of the bathroom.
"Ha. Here's my own abbreviation, P.M.S." Courtney laughed, facing the door. She then went back to fixing her makeup.
---- My heart's at a low
I'm so much to manage
I think you should know that
I've been damaged
I'm falling in love
There's one disadvantage
I think you should know that I've been damaged
----
Paige finally found Hazel in the cafeteria at lunch. Hazel was sitting around with Jimmy and Spinner. At first Paige was afraid to walk over. But she had too. She took a deep breath and walked over. Spinner noticed her walking over and turned the other way. He was furious. She was scared.
"Hazel," Paige said grabbing Hazel and pulling her to the side. "I need to talk to you." Paige whispered.
"What is it?" Hazel said.
Paige continued to whisper, "Can we talk in the bathroom?"
Hazel became confused. "First tell me why we are whispering."
Paige ignored her comment and pulled her to the bathroom. Hazel walked around the stalls, still puzzled; While Paige sat on the bathroom base of one of the sinks.
"Okay," Hazel began. "What you wanna tell me?"
"Haze, remember Dean?" Paige asked, hoping not to cry.
"That guy you were crushing bad last week? How could I forget! You were in love with him!" Hazel answered.
Paige lowered her head, "Well, now I hate him."
Hazel looked surprised. "Whoa! Why the sudden change?"
Paige lifted her head and revealed to Hazel that she had been crying. "When you decided to go home, I saw Spinner. So, I pulled that asshole, Dean upstairs. Thinking maybe they're was a room where we can hide out for a bit." Paige began between sobs. "Well, at first we were just you know...passionately kissing and stuff as he was telling me how pretty I was and how he really liked me. I accepted it. Then he..... took it to far."
Hazel put her hands on her mouth and walked over towards Paige who was hysterically in tears. Hazel held her friend in her arms and tried to console as much as she could.
"Hazel, I really liked him- he made me feel special. He made me feel safe around him. When really he was actually making me non-safe around him. I kept saying no, no, and more no's but he wouldn't listen!" Paige cried.
Hazel pulled away from Paige, "Did you see the Police? Did you a doctor?"
"No, I didn't see the police. And I didn't see a doctor because he was a little bit considerate and wore a condom."
"Paige, do you know what Dean did?"
"Besides mentally tear me in half? I don't know. What?"
Hazel paused, "He raped you, Paige. Dean raped you. You can take him to court for sexual assault."
Paige's mind went blank, me? I was raped? Paige thought I hear it happens a lot on the news...but I never thought it would happen to me...
That afternoon, Paige took a walk by herself, to one of the old-looking drugstores down the block from where she lived. She walked in picked up a few magazines, a milkshake, and a candy bar. Paige sat down at one of the benches outside of the store. And began reading her "Twist" Magazine as she took a sip of her milkshake. She flipped through the magazine looking for the certain articles she liked to read first when she got a magazine. She read embarrassing moments. Style tips. Etc. She came across three articles about readers and their lives. She read about a girl being bullied so much that she lost her eye site for a short period of time. And a brother coping over his younger brother's death of drug abuse. Paige then began to read an article about this girl about her age from the US, who had been sexually harassed, had been knocked out and raped at a party. The girl had eventually become pregnant, and was forced with no choice but to put the baby up for adoption. Paige began to cry.
Paige panicked and threw the magazine in the trash. She took a sip of her milkshake, then pulled the beverage away from her mouth and looked at it. "I'm such a pig!" She threw that and the candy bar in the trash and ran home.
When she ran up to her room, she went immediately to her mirror. She gazes at herself.
"Why me?" She asked her reflection. "Why me?!" She screamed. She began to bawl harder.
She felt that her heart was nothing but cold and musty air. She sat on the edge of her bed and but her hands between her legs. She began to think about all the times she was mean to her friends; the ones that never wanted to hurt her. How she was always trying to ruin Ashley's life. How she kept dwelling on the past, when all Ashley wanted was her friends. How she was blaming Hazel for the papers she ripped with Emma's article the year before. How she always thought she was the better one, and how everyone she passed thought of her as this bitchy diva. And how could she forget, how she was mean to Spinner. If she just kept her promise with Spinner, this would have never happened. She wouldn't be feeling this pain, and wouldn't be the target of everyone's pity.
Paige walked back over to her mirror, "Why are some guys so cruel and sick?" She screamed again at her reflection. She couldn't take it anymore. She picked up a chair, and screamed. "I hate my life!" and through the chair right through her standing mirror, and watched as her reflection shattered into little tiny pieces on the floor.
Spinner....