what an end this is

for Death himself

I smile at the irony

when was the last time I was happy?

was I ever?

what is happy?

A bittersweet memory of me

will be kept by only four

the ones who are closest to knowing

who the hell I am

A strange feeling passes,

the prelude to death

Maybe this is the end

How many times have I pondered just that?

I was right all along

for part of me died each time

now is different

Omnicide

the murder of all

thinking takes too much energy

so does sitting up

I fall face down

and drown in your stale water

Am I still alive?