RIVER OF LOVE

PART 1: THE TIME I NEED YOU MOST IS WHEN THE DAY TURNS TO NIGHT. "I don't wanna hurt anymore!" she shouted to him as he walked away. "And I hurt you is that what your saying?" he shot back. "No, I just, I.. dunno where I am in my life." She continued. "Forget it Abby, I know exactly what you're trying to say." He continued to walk away from her. "I thought we were good together." "We are." She pleaded. "Then why did you have a one nightstand mistake with Carter!" he shouted. She finally realised that she needed not to save her relationship with Luka but embark in one with the man she really loved. "It wasn't a mistake." She muttered just loud enough for him to hear. "What!?" he exploded in a rage of anger. "IT WASN'T A MISTAKE LUKA, I LOVE JOHN CARTER AND NOONE CAN TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME!" She yelled down the street. Luka spun round to face her, angrily giving her a harsh look. "Right, once upon a time, you told me you loved me, now you think you're in love with Carter, ha, you'll go off him like you did me, Richard and all the others." He replied hissing as he did so. "No don't say that." She ordered close to tears. "I will never ever stop loving Carter." "Yeah you will cos you said that to me but you stopped loving me." "That's different." She whispered. "Tell me Abby, how is this different from when we started dating?" he shouted making her jump. She suddenly seemed scared of him. "Because I only wanted you because I needed something that would help me other than drink, but you never did so I started taking an interest in Carter. That's when I fell in love with him." She spat out her explanation. "Whatever Abby." He muttered then walked away. Her gaze followed him till he was out of sight. "If this is what I want, then why do I feel bad?" she asked herself before setting off to her own apartment. She was so brisk in her walk home that she didn't notice Carter sitting on the edge of the steps to his apartment. He coughed and she looked at him. "Hey Carter" she practically whispered. "What's the matter?" he asked sympathetically. "I broke up with Luka." She answered dropping her head. He jumped up to hug her, but she pushed him away. "And the worse thing is that it was because of you." She muttered. He took a step back from her; he was disgusted that she would say such a thing. "Carter?" she whimpered. "Forget it Abby." He remarked before walking up the steps into his apartment. "Please Carter, I'm begging you, please don't walk away from me, I have done that my whole life and it got me no where. So please just don't walk away from me." She urgently cried. He turned and walked back down the steps to face her. She looked up at him, but his eyes were too harsh for her to look at. She had done this to him, she had loved him and he loved her, but she ruined it by falling into a short romance with Luka Kovac. She looked away, this time it was her turn to walk away; he didn't want her to stay. She threw a tearful goodbye over her shoulder before walking towards her apartment. It was at that exact moment he suddenly realised that he practically threw her heart away and he hated himself for it. He didn't go into the apartment; instead he lingered outside, waiting, watching the perfect world go by. He had lost her, he had been an asshole and that was what had made him lose her. Being an asshole had made him lose a lot of things in his life, but losing Abby was the worst thing John Carter could ever lose. Abby opened her apartment door and looked around; it seemed so empty though it was always like that. She needed him, the man that made her happy, and the man she loved, the man called John Carter. The only thing on earth that was important to her and she just practically threw it out the window. She longed for him to hold her, to love her, to caress her, to be with her. She turned on the radio and listened to the song that played:

In the middle of the day, I'm fine, I don't need anyone. But the night is cold and lonely, Without you the night is dark. And I hear you call my name

I hear the voices in my head, Telling me I have a heart. When the day turns to night, I need you with me, I wanna be suspended in your arms, I wanna love you, hold you, caress you, When the day turns to night.

As the lyrics played in her mind, they reminded her of how much she really needed Carter, and what she felt for him.

I ask myself everyday, Why do I need you so much, Why does the warmth only come when you're there, How come my life only seems whole when I'm with you, Has the world ever seen love like this before,

I hear the voices in my head, Telling me I have a heart. When the day turns to night, I need you with me, I wanna be suspended in your arms, I wanna love you, hold you, caress you, When the day turns to night.

Life isn't great, far from it. But the night's the saddest time, When the horror runs through your mind, But in day the horror continues through the time, I need you now and forever.

I hear voices in my head, Telling me I have a heart. When the day turns to night, I need you with me, I wanna be suspended in your arms, I wanna love you, hold you, caress you, When the day turns to night.

I hear the voices in my head, Telling me I have a heart. When the day turns to night, I need you with me, I wanna be suspended in you're arms, I wanna love you, hold you, caress you, When the day turns to night.

The time I need you most, Is when the day turns to night.

She hated that song because of the effect it had on her, all she could think about was Carter and how she'd treated him. Suddenly she felt an ache inside her; it was an ache from her heart. Longing to hold Carter, longing to be held by Carter, yearning for his touch, she sat down on the couch. Laying her head back, she quickly fell asleep.

Carter's POV

Why am I at her front door? Why am I giving in to my heart? Easy, because if I don't I'm gonna go mad waiting to hold her, waiting to caress her, wanting to kiss her. Suddenly these thoughts made the journey to her door seem shorter, now before I knew it I am standing at her door. It's not too late; I can turn back now, walk away and forget that I love her more than any goddamn thing in the whole world. Nope, it's too late, I've knocked on her oak door and am standing hear looking pathetic and small. This is the effect she has over me; I can't help it, as soon as she walks in my strength walks out the door. This makes me think of a song I hear practically everyday; it's on the cd in my car.

I know all about, Yea about your reputation And now it's bound to be a heartbreak situation But I can't help it if I'm helpless Every time that I'm with you, ah You walk in and my strength walks out the door Say my name and I can fight it any more Oh I know, I should go But I need your touch just too damn much Lovin you, That isn't really something I should do I shouldn't wanna spend my time with you ya Well I should try to be strong But baby you're the right kind of wrong But baby you're the right kind of wrong Ya, baby you're the right kind of wrong

It might be a mistake A mistake I'm makin' But what your givin I am happy to be takin 'Cause all that will make me feel The way I feel when I'm in your arms

They say your somethin I should do without They don't know what goes on When the lights go out There's no way to explain All the pleasure is worth all the pain Lovin you, That isn't really something I should do ya-hey I shouldn't wanna spend my time with you ya Well I should try to be strong But baby you're the right kind of wrong Ya, baby you're the right kind of wrong

I should try to run but I just can't seem to 'Cause every time I run your the one I run to Can't do without what you do to me, I don't care if I'm in to deep yeah

I know all about, Yea about your reputation And now it's bound to be a heartbreak situation But I can't help it if I'm helpless Every time that I'm with you, ah

You walk in and my strength walks out the door Say my name and I can fight it any more Oh I know, I should go But I need your touch just too damn much Hey-yeah Lovin you, yeah, isn't really something I should do I shouldn't wanna spend my time with you ya Well I should try to be strong, I should try to be strong But baby you're the right kind of wrong (right kind of wrong) Baby you're the right kind of wrong Baby you're the right kind of wrong

Yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong

Except to me Abby is not the right kinda wrong cos when you love someone as much as I love her, the normal rules of life so do not apply. I think I heard that in some lame film with some lame actors, maybe not all of them but pretty much all of them. Suddenly the door flies open and standing there is a very pissed off Abby. "Carter what are you doing here?" she started. "It's 10:30 pm" Her voice is a sweet melody that I wanna hear everyday but one of the many things in life that are probably gonna happen, unfortunately. "I don't know." Is all I can pathetically say. "Right.." Abby raised an eyebrow, and I'm sure she thinks I'm crazy. "I just needed to see you." I say. How pathetic am I? Of course I needed to see her, I'm in love with her I have practically loved her all my life, and right now I needed to see how angry I had made, how pissed off she would be, how upset she would be; all because of me, that makes my heart ache when I know I have done this to her. "That's cute." She sighed turning away. She leaves the door open for me and I'm grateful, I need to talk to her right now. The physical attraction between us is so obvious, why doesn't she get that? What do I have to say to get through to her? I walk in after her and she stands there looking at the floor. "We need to talk about us." I break the silence. "you know that that can't happen right now, cos I know the only thing I'm gonna do is disappoint you. I will forever disappoint you."